• Published 25th May 2013
  • 5,472 Views, 330 Comments

Bloody Show Ponies! - GentlemannlySniper



When Twilight and Fluttershy move to another world to learn more about a race that even Celestia knows nothing about, they get into a very unusually strange, friendship-less world...

  • ...
20
 330
 5,472

Chapter 3 1/2: The late night dove hunt

"Psst....Archimeeeeedeeeeeessss! Argh, vere is zat damn bird?" The Medic searched around frantically, wearing his casual shirt and vest, which were cleanly stuffed into his pants so that he could look presentable. "Zat damn bird is alvays flying off! Komm raus, little dove!" He called out softly, as to not wake up anyone.

"Doc', what are you doing?" The Soldier asked, coming out fully clothed in pajamas and a triangular hat with a little fuzz ball attached to the end of it.

"Oh! Soldier! I vasn't expecting you to be awake! Vould you help me find Archimedes?" He asked, as he continued his search.

"Come on Doc', It's probably still sleeping in that bird cage I got 'cha for smissmas..." The Soldier reasoned, as he turned to go back to his room.

"If you let me down, you let down America..." The Medic threatened, which made Soldier stand up at attention, as he ran his way over to the Medic.

"Lieutenant General Soldier, at your service!" He said, with the flames of a pure american heart beating deep within that war rusted heart of his.

The Medic smiled, as he pointed to an untouched part of the room. "Now, check every little nook and cranny of zat part of ze room!"

"Sir, yes sir!" The soldier said, as he rushed to the room to search for Archimedes.

"Hey Doc'?" The Soldier asked, as he looked over his shoulder at the Medic, who finished looking around his part of the room.

"Yes?" He responded as he made his way over to Soldier's side of the room to help him search.

"I don't trust those colorful ponies..." The Soldier said, as he looked under a crate.

"Really? Zey don't seem like a threat...." Medic replied, as he took out a couple seeds and put them around the ground.

"That's what we said about a wounded Heavy, and then he got up while we turned our backs and ripped out our spines!!!" He growled.

"Sshhshshshsshhhh!" The Medic warned, which led the Soldier to let out a low growl. "And yes, zat vas very bloody...Don't judge a book by zeir cover, I guess..." He said, with a slow nod of agreement.

"Now, vere iz zat damn bird!? It's his bed time, and I von't have ze bird asleep on ze job!....Or better yet not asleep inside ze job..." He said, with a small sigh.

"Found it!" The Soldier said, as he held up a small white mouse, that squeaked against the Soldier's grasp. "Oh wait...no that's a- ARRRGGGHHHH! DAMN RAT!" The rat had bitten into the Soldier's hand, and the Medic sushed him up.

"Keep quiet, dummkopf!" Medic said, angered by the Soldier's loud voice.

"Sorry..." The Soldier said, quietly, before continuing the search, rubbing his aching hand every now and then.

"Hey Doc, I know what happened to your bird!"

"Vat do you m-"

"The ponies ate him!"

The Medic facepalmed. "Should I mention zat ponies are herbivorez, Soldier?" He said, in aggravation, no less.

"They hugged me! They're obviously planning on doing something here Doc!" The Soldier said, with anger bellowing from deep within his soul.

"You've never had a childhood ven you vere younger, did you?" The Medic said, giving the Soldier a displeasing look.

"And I'm still the man I am today! And besides! What if they want to get to know us better?" The Soldier asked, closing in on the doctor.

"Vat do you mean?" The Medic asked, giving his rocket wielding friend a quizzical look.

"You know these two things are in our hands now, right? If they get to know us for who we really are, then they'll go running off! And guess who would find 'em and slaughter 'em?!" The projectile expert said, adjusting his pajama hat over his eyes.

"Are you saying zat if zey know about our past...zey vill most likely turn tail and run?" The Medic suggested, as he stopped what he was looking for.

"Exactly my point, Doc! They must never know!" The Soldier said, holding his hand to the doctor.

The Medic rolled his eyes. "Zat is ze most-...." The Medic stopped himself....

He was right, if they found out about the brutal pasts of him and each of his colleagues, this would spell disaster to these ponies, and they would run the second they could, forgetting about their enemies....

and then, they could die in so many horrific ways...

And Medic knew this very well, since he's used to getting blown up, shot at, hit by trains, and falling down very steep cliffs...

"Soldier, you are a ficken genuis!" He said, putting his hands on the Soldier's hands.

The Soldier blinked. "What? What did I say?" He said, before the Medic left him and went back to his room. The Soldier scratched his head in confusion, before turning around to look for Archimedes again. "Where's that damn bird..."

Soon after, the Medic came back, carrying a small book. "Soldier, write in zis book..." He demanded, shoving the book in the Soldier's hands.

"....Whhhhyyyyy....?" The Soldier asked cautiously, which led the Medic to grin.

"Ve are going to rewrite our history! Unt zen, ven zey ask more about us, zey vill think ve are not zat bad after all!" The Medic said, thinking this idea was fool-proof.

"Wow! Good thinkin' Doc!...Er...what should I write about?" He asked, which led the Medic to give a big style.

"Ah, yes, Ze Soldier, Ze ace of ze best men in ze army! Highest ranking officer and a man vith a heart of gold! Ze man zat saved our lives, over and over, again and again! Write somezing along zose lines!" He said, with a smile.

The Soldier put a thoughtful hand to his chin, and smiled at the thought. "Not like any of this is fake anyway! You've done me proud, son!" He complimented, as he took out a pencil he had in his pocket, and began writing in the book, as he walked back to his room.

Medic clapped silently. "Excellent! Now, ve vill make zure zey are out of harms way!" He said, and waited for a bit.

"Vait...oh Scheiße, I forgot about Archimedes..." The Medic remembered, as he then began to look for his bird again...

Author's Note:

Don't forget to comment! It keeps me motivated :D