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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
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Just finished reading this chapter and I realized; you can write action scenes pretty good. Only noticed one error (below). Can't wait till the next chapter.
"Rearing back in pain,...then the finally round flew out..." (scorpion fight)
20k words! HHHHNNNNGGG *dies*
240413
Action scenes work very well for me. But ask me to type up a slow plot based scene and it takes me...help me out here Pinkie...
s3.amazonaws.com/kym-assets/photos/images/newsfeed/000/139/680/1306559090154.jpg?1308925755
Thank you.
Chapter Five turned out to have NO fighting in it what so ever...it...it makes me sad. But it does drive the story I think, now to just get my pre readers on it...oh yeah I should proable finish fluffing it out some as well hehe Oh, and thanks for the error you spotted I shall fix it post haste!
*goes back to reading other peoples fanfics*
241055
Dare I say it? Hmmm...Its over 10,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yeah...that made me sad too...
Okay a few things.
1. I went through as I was reading and noticed a bunch of minor syntax errors. Are you by any chance looking for more editors?
2. I'm really liking this so far :D
3. The part where the few ponies poisoned themselves sounded to me kinda like an iron maiden reference, the song "when the wild wind blows", but that could be just me.
If you do want me as a proofreader, hit me up here or on Skype (adobe66)
'I stood silently' doesn't work; neither does 'Once they were finished'. 'It was a photo' is also unavailable. 'Into each' is still on YouTube, but now it's private so I can't listen to it.
This took longer than I was expecting because my father was swapping the modem we use and trying to get a better picture with out TV. The good news is that my laptop's wireless enabler actually talks to the new wireless modem (for some reason, it didn't with the old modem) so for the first time in a very long time I'm not actually plugged in!
I normally enjoy stories like these, I am a big FoE fan. I just can't read this fic, the main character and his best friend.. I am getting hung up over the names. Not my cup of tea, thanks and good work on this :)
One hundred and seventy eight years so it a hundred years pre littlepip?
6823777
Really now? REALLY?! A hundred years before Littlepip?! I can't believe it. X'D