sPxHoLEic Teaser (For Public Release) · 1:42am Feb 1st, 2016
Since it's been...a very long time since sPxHoLEic last updated, and since I'm endeavoring to actually finish the next chapter within the coming week, I thought I'd share a couple of little teaser snippets with the general public.
Ordinarily I wouldn't share snippets of a commission in this manner, but I feel like I kind of owe it to everyone actually reading this story. (Plus, it's a little shameless promotion for my followers who aren't reading it for whatever reason... 
)
(Note that since this IS a commissioned story, if the client nixes anything that happens to be present in this teaser during final approval, it won't be showing up in the published story.)
Teaser #1
"Girls, you remember Trixie, right?" Rarity said lightly.
Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle stared at the blue unicorn filly in front of them.
"Uhh...ain't Trixie a grown pony?" Apple Bloom asked.
"Yeah, this looks more like Trixie's kid sister," Scootaloo said.
Trixie sighed. "I really am the Great and Powerful Trixie. I kinda had a little accident..."
"Usually when I have a little accident, my mom puts rubber sheets on the bed," Scootaloo said.
"NOT THAT KIND OF ACCIDENT!"
Sweetie Belle tilted her head. "What'd you do, try that age spell thing again?"
Trixie nodded. "I managed to cast it, it just...didn't hit who it was supposed to." She ducked her head and scuffed the floor with a hoof.
"Since Twilight Sparkle is too busy planning the Gala, Trixie's going to be spending the week like this, and will be attending the Gala as Sunset Shimmer's plus-one," Rarity said. "In the meantime, since everypony has so much work to do to prepare for the Gala, I'd very much like if the three of you would keep Trixie company."
"Ugh, we gotta babysit Trixie?" Scootaloo asked, making a face.
Rarity frowned. "No, you most certainly do not have to babysit her," she said. "But Trixie could use a few friends right now, and given her current...ahem...situation...I thought it best she make the most of it." She smiled. "It certainly couldn't hurt to pass the week playing with other fillies, now could it?"
Trixie rolled her eyes. "Alright, fine," she said. She looked at the Crusaders. "So, what exactly do you three do?"
Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo looked at each other. Identical evil grins split their faces.
"Girls?" Apple Bloom said. "Let's show Trixie why we're called the Cutie Mark Crusaders."
Trixie felt a sudden spike of dread down her spine...
Teaser #2
"By the way, Twilight, there's somepony I want you to meet," Celestia whispered as she waited for the next guest in the queue to approach. Once she and Twilight had greeted two more guests, she signaled for a herald to take over welcoming duties, then led Twilight through the ballroom. They approached a powder-blue unicorn mare whose ice-colored mane was tied in twin ponytails. She wore a simple, severe dark purple and black dress; a pair of small, angular salmon-framed glasses was perched on her muzzle. She gave them a level, measuring stare as they approached.
"Sugarcoat, I'm so glad you made it tonight!" Celestia smiled at the mare.
Sugarcoat nodded briefly. "Your Majesty." She looked around the room. "The Gala's as boring as usual. Are you planning to troll the snobby nobles again?" She glanced at Twilight, then added, "I see you brought Princess Crazy-Pants along."
Twilight blinked. "Ex...cuse me?"
Sugarcoat snorted. "Everypony in Canterlot knows you're neurotic and obsessive-compulsive. Probably everypony in Ponyville too. It's just that now that you're a princess, nopony's going to call you out on it." She paused. "I hope you do something really neurotic tonight. It'll make this Gala more interesting."
Celestia chuckled. "Now, Sugarcoat," she said, "I'd appreciate if you'd save your candor for the ponies that truly deserve it. Especially since you're going to be working for Princess Twilight from now on."
Twilight stared at her. "What?!"
Sugarcoat stared at her. "What."
Celestia smiled. "Twilight, Sugarcoat is the pony I've chosen as the chief of staff for your palace."
Twilight's jaw dropped. "You've gotta be kidding!" She looked from Celestia to Sugarcoat and back. "The first thing she did was insult me and call me crazy!"
"Exactly," Celestia said. "She's the perfect pony to keep you on your toes. Sugarcoat, well...her special talent is being forthright and observant. In a way, she's like your friend Applejack. Every word out of her mouth is honest and true. It's just..." She paused, tilting her head. "Unfiltered."
"You have broccoli in your teeth," Sugarcoat said.
"See?" Celestia paused, then conjured up a toothpick and tried to discreetly dislodge the broccoli.
"I don't think I want to work in Ponyville," Sugarcoat said. "It's an entire town of crazy ponies."
"That's true," Celestia said, "but I'm tired of listening to the Canterlot nobles complain about you."
Sugarcoat gave her a flat stare. "That was harsh."
Twilight snorted. "If that isn't the pot calling the kettle black."
That Sugarcoat part looks interesting. Can't wait to see it full thing.
You have earned my respect.
0/10 Too much Scootaloo having a mom.
All unfunny cliches aside, though, I could criticize this as being a little bit too unfocused on the original point of the story. I won't though, because this looks like it's going to be really amusing. I am wondering how Spike will react to Sugarcoat, though. Will he find her criticisms of Twilight funny, or will he be offended by them? Will he interpret her presence as a threat in some way? Will he and Trixie bond over having perceived rivals? I am legitimately interested in finding out.
Also, and this is a really minor nitpick, I feel like the phrase "keep you on your toes" wouldn't make sense in Equestria. Again, nitpicking.
Oh Celestia, i hope Sugarcoat officially makes it into the story without getting nixed! That wud be EPIC!
Now all we need is Flash to become Captain of Twilight's guard, so he can be the resident object of all jokes/pranks/fails/derision/awkwardness etc... but in a kindly way of course