A record of things gone wrong · 9:36am Oct 19th, 2015
So, Drunkentale was a success.
Sort of.
Many of you guys showed up (thank you everyone!) to watch me stumble around and be stupid. I got extremely pissed, and I barely remember any of what happened. But finally, the whole uncut playthrough finished processing in youtube, and I present to you, shamefully, the fruits of my labour (because I was drinking port. HAHAHAHA.)
Ladies and Gentlemen, Drunkentale.
For those who couldn't join, here it is as it happened. As I came to understand, I said many weird things in the latter half that I couldn't take back, and also there were incidents, but I think it managed to do what I wanted, which was to make people respect me less than they already do. Give it a look, or maybe someone else who watched the thing can give highlights (because I don't want to relive this myself).
If you want to watch just the parts where I start to drink, skip ahead to 55:43. Also, take note that I had 2 shots before I started 'for the road' which in retrospect was a reallllly bad idea.
But I would like to state for the record that this was not an enjoyable or smart idea. No one should do this. I was pretty much out for ages and ruined my own weekend. At least I have a video to show for it. I am probably not going to do this again because I had a bad time.
A BAD TIME.
Still gonna kill Sans one day, though.
I already have zero respect for you, so this changes nothing.
Now stop blogging at work and get back to fixing websites. Your soul belongs to the koalas now.
I like to imagine that the intro music grows more and more insistent and impatient every time it repeats as you fumble with the cork.
3481585
That is surprisingly accurate
at least in my head.
My respect is earned through destructive weeble wurbling
Hard drink makes one free Reesoo
One hour later, the questionable nature of the decision to engage in behavior that significantly impacts your coordination as a failure condition for a task that requires increasing amounts of coordination becomes apparent.
3481660
I weebled and wurbled aplenty sir.
Also it was barely hard. I was drinking port. I just never drink in my social life, that's all.
3481681
the best part is that I don't remember it!
3481696 I have never had port
I don't even know what it is exactly
why would anyone drink things that are not 100 proof vodkas
3481703
Because 100 proof vodka just tastes like licking old batteries and I like flavour ;(
Port is fortified wine. I think I explain it in the video somewhere.
3481706 and now I know a new thing
It tastes like forgetting and that is a good taste
I think?
I forgot
"HIIIIII PLUUUUM" and "My face feels like Yoshi's Island" will forever live on in my memory.
I gave in and played through the normal and pacifist endings and decided I didn't want to do a genocide run so I can watch this without spoilers now. Yay?
(approx. 52:00)
Flowey: "There's just one thing left to do."
KR: "SHIP EVERYTHING."
yesssssssssssssss
But seriously though, given what you have to actually do in order to genocide the game, I think you played perhaps the most appropriate kill run ever. You're literally injuring yourself and distancing yourself from pain and other people as you descend into the game's full madness.
It's, like, symbolic and shit.
At this point beating Sans kind of seems like a formality.
Some other great drunken
blackmail materialquotes, approximate timestamps:1:27:40 "This port is starting to taste like anger … anger and pain and bile and uhhhhhhhhhhhhm … what was I talking about? can someone remind me in the chat? What am I doing."
1:30:00 "Port is basically … they take the wine, and they put the MORE wine in the wine, so it becomes double wine, and you drink the double wine, and it makes twice as much wine in your stomach. And your face." /seems legit
1:46:50 "The Legendary Hero … Oh, I get it! Because a hero is both a kind of sandwich, and also a really bad television program. Fuck you Tim Crane! … … … So Plum is yelling at me in the … in the … what do you call this thing? With the words that go up the sides? … In the chat. Plum is yelling at me in the chat and I'm not sure why."
1:47:50 "Pie is the literal enemy of fish people."
1:48:15 "Give me a moment. I'm going to go get a bottle of water. I'm gonna stop drinking. … My face feels like Yoshi's Island."
1:49:50 "Why do liquids spill? If someone Kickstarts me I'm going to start a project for unspillable liquids."
1:52:17 "As you can tell I had a few drinks. Not that many." [note: this is after like 15+ drinks and losing count on the deaths]
My morning routine now includes killing Sans. It really does wake you up. It's also a great confidence booster.
puu.sh/kQvEG.PNG
3483025
God, I don't remember most of this.
That would be Tim Kring, though, the creator of Heroes, a show I really, truly despise. Not even being blind drunk can distract me from my utter hatred of Tim Kring.
Named "Temmie" absolutely disgusting
So did you ever go back and succeed?
3498433
Not yet, lol