Scootareader's Guide to Getting Banned · 11:45pm Jul 20th, 2014
Disclaimer: Don't actually do anything that I suggest doing in this blog post. Don't ban plz mods.
So, I've been getting a lot of questions lately about how to get banned from FIMFiction. Well, let Scootareader, the master of all things that are things, give you some tips and tricks about how to make the most out of your time getting banned from FIMFiction!
The first mark of every serious post must be a sexy Rarity picture.
1. Every day, go to the user page of each mod and post this:
They will be appalled at your honesty as well as your work ethic and be left with no choice.
2. Drunk post profusely. If you can read what you're writing, it's not ban-worthy.
3. When confronted with something you said concerning verbiage and respect, remind the mods that you are a personal friend of Knighty and will get them banned if they continue to harass you. They will then ask Knighty about your personal relationship with him and learn that, while you are a personal friend of his, he thinks you should be banned just as a joke.
4. On a story that you don't like, make about seven or eight comments in a row that say "brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr" and then proceed to delete them all, then make a follow-up comment saying that the author is deleting comments. The mods will take this as a challenge of their comment deletion privileges and will be forced to one-up you.
5. Re-post already posted stories when and where possible. The mods understand the desire to increase follower count by ripping off stories that other people wrote, but they also understand capitalistic ideals. If they remove the competition, it will in turn bolster their own follower counts, because there won't be as many people to have to stand on the shoulders of.
6. Roleplay profusely. The mods don't like it when people use their imagination.
7. Use the mods as your verbal punching bag whenever you dislike something that is done well within the established rules of the site--you know, the rules you signed up for. The mods will recognize your attempts to strengthen your debate skills, but they want you to work for the experience, so they will repeatedly ban your account whenever you seem to be getting too lackadaisical in your debating.
8. Post NSFW content wherever and whenever possible. The mods, after fapping, will ban you so that no one else may fap to their fap content.
9. Stage weekly coups to overthrow the oligarchist regime of FIMFiction. The mods will appreciate your participation in government, but unless you can keep it secret until the time to topple them, they'll nip you in the bud so that you can try again next week. Unpublished view password is sic semper tyrannis.
10. Romance Knighty's mother, then break her heart.
With this ten-step comprehensive plan to getting banned, you'll be well on your way to being a successful FIMFiction user like yours truly! 
The Grand Story Repository sounds like a great idea!
You, I love you.
Damn straight, son.
2302859
We should totally collab on it.
You think so too?
2302864
images.wikia.com/mlp/images/archive/b/b9/20120330173939!Twilight_blushes_again_S1E6.png
I don't deserve such kind praise. My greatest hope is that I gave you a laugh, no more.
I LOVE THIS! You are bloody HELRIOUS!!!!!!!!!!
If I ever engage in a truth or dare game with you, we will have to try those dares.
2302900
How about... all of them! On a dare.
2302912 images6.fanpop.com/image/photos/36100000/Derpy-Hooves-MLP-FiM-image-derpy-hooves-mlp-fim-36194295-720-690.jpg
I think I like you, OP.
2302950
I must try harder to win your heart!
Only like?
2303011
Well, my penis is down there...
It's posts like these that remind me why I follow you in the first place.
Lol ur gonna be an example of the mods' lack of humor.
Hm...... well I have been feeling power mad lately.......
2303397
I'd like to see them try.
(Not really pls don't ban mods)
About step 3. How do you become personal friends with Knighty..? I've sent him multiple PMs depicting my affection for him and he just keeps blanking me.
2303772
I thought everyone was total bros with that guy.
Wait, you're not personal friends with Knighty already?
2304012
Probably everyone except me.
2304042
Never mind that I don't know his first name, but if I had to take a guess, I'd say everyone else knows it.
That's entirely likely. Everyone's on first name terms with Knighty that I talk to.
2304054
... all by myself...
2304083
Who needs to be validated by Knighty, anyway?
I'm here.
2304125
You're right. Thanks Scooty. 
2304134
Scooty... not many call me by that nickname.
2304135 I'm not very good at nicknames... I usually just call people cutie. Do you like it..?
2304144
I don't mind it one bit.
2304172
You know that Scootaloo is worst pony.Okay I''ll keep calling you that, Scooty.I freaking died. It's a good thing I followed you!
dashie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw10629-LyraPimpstrings.gif
Hahaha! Brilliant!
#6 is so wonderfully true.
"Does nothing for the fandom/site," I think Knighty said before banning it...
You should actually shorten this guide to three principal rules:
1.) Have an unpopular opinion.
2.) Tell someone the harsh truth about their behavior, story, or art.
3.) Have a sense of humor.
This made me laugh hysterically
Thanks for the funny post 
4407306
Glad to hear it.
4407345 Thanks!