No, this is the blog post I should have made. · 7:12am Feb 23rd, 2013
This is not a whine post.
7 times.
7 times I've put my heart into something. I've worked MONTHS on something, wasted the time of very very nice people who've helped me edit and review and plan.
And... every time, as par all my experiences, it usually comes to the digital form of sort of being looked with a tiny bit of disdain and then passed over, like as if someone in a fancy party gave you a plate full of freeze-dried cow bollocks. As if to say, thanks, but... ah... maybe this is for other people.
I have never had the joyous experience of having a great reception. Never had the happiness of knowing that you can reach out and penetrate a public sphere. I feel like I'm writing for a very small group of people, half of which pity me and half of which kind of just tolerate me because I pay them money.
If I were to remove the people whose throats I force my fics down, I'd have approximately 2 genuine readers at launch for ANYTHING I've ever done.
Things whiz by overhead, where fics I see which are SO similar in every respect do much much better and I always wonder what is it, what curse have I borne that leads me to just be... hated in general? Whose ass did I put the cactus in? Is there a god above who spat on my hair and called me funny names behind the schoolyard and now I'm just 'uncool'?
Yeah. I could think of all these things. Everytime I post a fic I get down as shit. Because It's disheartening.
With every new thing I do, regardless of what it is, no matter what, it doesn't WORK. In the end people try to help me. And that makes me feel WORSE, because while I genuinely appreciate the help, I'm stuck thinking that that's the only thing that's getting me anywhere. Cognitive dissonance, anyone? I have to hate the very things I love. It's a bit like Twilicorn.
So I get into a bad mood. I question everything. I hate myself. I hate what I do. Every time it happens in succession I get one step closer to quitting everything. Throwing down the golden towel and going yeah, no one's gonna care anyway. Kind of true. No one is. But that's not what it's about.
After a while (and eating a lot of delicious yummy pills) I finally realise that there's only one thing, really, that fucking matters. Anyone who ever got anywhere in this life has only ever had one single mantra to live by, and no matter how down a fucker gets, he has to just keep going no matter what, until he's left a broken, bleeding carcass on the floor, coated in nougat and rat shit. That's the only time when I'm going to stop.
This is my hero.
If you don't know what he said, I don't care. Because I know, and that's what this is all about.
And that's what we're going to do, ladies and gentlemen.
That's what we're going to do.
Shout out below if you know the quote, my babies. Because EVERYONE needs to know that these are the truest words Tim Allen has ever said.
EDIT:
Oh for crying out loud. No one knows =(
NEVER GIVE UP! NEVER SURRENDER!!!!!!
Yes. Well, sort of... lost the impact now...
I'm gonna go drink a beer in the corner.
Well frankly I tend to read most of your stories, I just don't post often. I understand the frustrations with putting your work into something then not seeing the results you expected. It happens to us all whether in everyday life or when we're writing something for the internet. I must implore you to realize that you're a genuinely good writer especially by the fandom's standards. It would be sad to see you stop writing (I don't know the Tim Allen quote that you're referring to).
Some writers on here play to the feature box and try to post when there's not many "Main" fics in it in order to gain recognition quickly. (I know some who openly admit to it in their blog posts) If it bothers you that much, then by all means try to play the system as well. It shouldn't though, you write enjoyable stories and people will find you in time without the fancy gimmicks and other silly games.
Something I forgot to add: Sometimes overexposure is a bad thing. Look at stories such as "The Golden Armor", the writer is trying to push out chapters every day or so just to meet the demand of the fandom and tried for a while to fit what everyone wanted him to be. The site is full of people who think they know how your fanfic should go better than yourself and it's easy to fall into the trap of trying to please everyone while the quality of writing goes down overall.
Most of those samey popular fics get popular because that is what most want to read. They aren't looking for stories delving deep into the heart of a character, aren't hunting for those elusive fics that feel so real they can make your heart ache... Nope, they wants tits, ass, and the simplest language possible because complex topics makes their heads hurt. If it also includes a crossover to some retarded video game they also like, it is even more attractive, because trying to read a unique story is waaaaaay beyond their mental faculties. They only have room for one incredibly shallow world, so if they can get a story that uses that shallow world, it keeps their brains from overheating.
Appealling to the lowest common denominator.
Shrug it off, recognize that you really are a damn good writer, and resume writing with swagger.
Strut, you magnificent bastard,
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Boy, I really hope someone says the quote, or else I'll look like a RIGHT fool.
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And listen to Martian. He's another damn good writer in a similar boat as you. Not as much exposure but overall MUCH better fanfics than the slop that gets posted to this site daily.
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Martian exceeds me by leaps and bounds. His stories are so simple but at the same time so deep.
It's like... I can't even.... fathom the ability. I've been trying to suck his power for a while but I can't.
Martian...
let me suck your power. =(
I'm pretty sure I've said the same things everyone else here has.
I really hope this succeeds, but... that's life.
By Odin's shaggy beard, don't put me on a pedestal. I'm just this guy, you know?
Also: I haven't watched Galaxy Quest since it came out. That was 13 years ago. Give me a break!
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Ah. Is that the faint floral flavours of Pimm's #1 I taste upon thine odd circumference?
Indeed. A cup is what we need. It is what we all need.
Pimm's #1 Cup. Drink deeply of martian's power.
bonappetit.com/images/magazine/2010/04/mare_the_pimms_cup_v.jpg
But no. I have been trying to do what you do for a while now. Nothing works, because I'm a livid angry asshole who hates life and cannot capture the essence of the simple and beautiful. I cannot... just... express beautifully the wonder of the absolute in words such as you do. So you get up on that pedestal and don't come down until I say so!
Don't you mean.... By Grabthar's Hammer?
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It is life! We move on! We get better! Chapter 2 in a week, damnit. Chapter 3 is where your babydear is out. Special mention to you, don't worry. =)
Never give up! Never surrender! Destroy and recreate the Universe to fix mistakes!
Being overlooked sucks, yes. It's not hard to feel under-appreciated. I know you keep calling me a celebrity, but I've never had a story featured on launch either, so I know the feeling. Best you can do is cross your fingers, swear silently at the ignorant masses, and hope that you can
bribeearn your way into a spot on EQD.'Course, as a wise lady once told me, never trust the opinions of anyone on the internet.
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HOORAY FOR POLY!
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shh shh... spoilers... =3
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And old woman once told me, don't trust what old women say.
So I shot her. =(
But yeah. but what can we do. MOVE ON! Post a bitchy blog and move on =)
Uhm....If it helps, Six Walk In is one of the best stories I've ever read. I loved how you personalized the "descent into insanity" for each character and the writing style was absolutely beautiful.
If this makes you feel a little better, I'll say this: it took me at least 3 days for my first story to get the number of views Romancing the Clouds did in a few hours.
I agree with what Martian said, a lot of the popular stories were popular because of the concept or the author himself/herself were already popular in the first place. Especially a lot of those which got onto the feature box.
From what little I saw of your writing (mainly Diary of an Equestrian Overlord), I will say that you are definitely a good writer, just that you're not catching any breaks. I'm also experiencing something similar at the moment, people read my story but few ever post any comments or feedbacks. It's almost as if my words are intimidating them.
Ach! I knew the quote, but you ran out of patience and edited in the explanation of it before I got a chance to say anything! By Grapthar's hammer!
I feel for ya, sir. I would say I'm in the same boat, but the fact is, it's a big frickin' boat. There's a lot of good authors on the site that the whims of the Featured Box see fit to snub. I do my best to downplay my expectations whenever I launch a new story, but there's always that little flicker of hope in the corner of my mind that just maybe this one will be the one that'll make it. So far, I've yet to write one that does. (Teatime Visit hits the box when it updates, but the first chapter never made it to the non-update slots.)
Just gotta hang in there, and write what you wanted to write. Never give in, never surrender!
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SORRY, sorry.
I think this entire blog speaks to your writing genius - spoilers aside, there's no doubt that you've hit on something huge. I'm SO PLEASED EVERYONE ELSE SEES WHAT I'VE KNOWN FOR... what is it, a decade? Fourteen hours? Whichever!
VALIDATION RULES!
It's on my "read immediately next" list.
I have to admit though, I am mildly concerned about the "genre tags will be added as the story progresses the avoid spoilers" statement. If it's going to be a depressing tragedy of a story, I'd much rather know up front.
Also, you should have waited longer for someone to know the quote. Never give up, after all.
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Ah, thank you very much! Nice to see there ARE people reading.. =)
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50 of those views were from my editors, haha... so yeah, it didn't do as well as it looks. That's why I know the truth >_>;
And yes! our horrible Chinese words... scaring people off... =( I know those feels, brah.
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Glad I'm not ALONE in the boat.... but... it's bad for ALL of us! GRRRR. Anyway.
Let's all chant now... LIVE LONG AND PR-
oh wait. I mean, NEVER GIVE UP, NEVER SURRENDER!
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14 decades, clearly.
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I couldn't wait. It started to make me look like a whiny bitch. =(
I mean, I am, but... MORE of a whiny bitch.
okay, so just for you, the tags that ARE going to eventually be there when the story is complete will be dark, sad and tragedy. But as you know, I kind of write rollercoaster type fics, so the bits sort of come interspersed. I don't want people to sort of think that it's being written towards a certain direction, so I'm leaving out the tags until it is appropriate. I'm honestly even questioning putting those tags in at all because they surely aren't the FOCUS of the fic... so I wonder if they're relevant.
Ain't that the truth. It's gotta be like 8 or 9 months since, well, you know, and I still get a little bit sick to my stomach thinking about what's going on in These City Walls. Now that's some staying power.
Thanks for the mild tag spoiler.
Every time I hit the Publish button, I wait a second for the trap door to open below me. If it's Chapter 1, the moderators are going to hate it and send me back a list of things wrong with it that's longer than the chapter itself. (Oh, wait, that's EqD.) And if by some fluke they do approve it, maybe ten readers will show up, and nine of them will thumb it down with great vigor.
If it's Chapter 2 or thereafter, I will swiftly be informed of how I'm taking this tale in an unfortunate new direction, how I've lost focus, and how I should be banished to some other fandom: Justin Bieber fans, perhaps, or is there a group for the Star Wars Holiday Special?
This is perhaps odd behavior for an individual who in the quarter-century before had written over twenty thousand short pieces, for Usenet, CompuServe, QuantumLink, AOL and the Web. Or, you know, not: to this day I never know how the audience I have will respond to anything I come up with. (To this day, I never know how it is I have an audience, but that's another matter entirely.)
And maybe ultimately it's healthy: if I start shoveling stuff out with absolute confidence, swagger even, I'm just asking for a rude surprise, am I not?
But I am also a lividly angry asshole who hates life...
Ffff, you're making me squirm. DO NOT COMPLIMENT ME, DAMMIT.
But it's cold and I'm scared of heights...
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WHICH I WILL FINISH. I promise >_>;
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Yeah, DA is another one. Right now for anyone in entry level it's just a hole you throw shit in and hope won't burn instantly.
And.. I do all of that. Even with Bad Horse. I try to take most of it but I have to stop short at a complete selling out of self... and the time I post it is quite up to the gods of fate. Either way, there's just some combination that people just fear. Or that sign on my back. Mmm. Well. Also my good friend Crack just reckons that I don't write things that the mass wants to bother with. Something that resonates with what Martian said... Ah well. NEVER GIVE UP! And thanks for all the tips!
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Use to be I thought that I should always be pessimistic so that when something good happens I can be pleasantly surprised. But nowadays I realise that the right way to go about things is to be REALISTIC. Of course, doesn't help the sudden mood swings, but... realistic is the safest. Also, 20,000? Sheesh. I admire you, Dusty.
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You say one thing, but that smiley tells another tale you sexy beast you.
Anyway, that pedestal is pretty short. I couldn't afford the whole thing.
It's more like a step, really.
reminds me of my story. 2 monts on making a 5k word oneshot. Every single line polished again and again.
3 upvotes, and 1 downvote
This fandom is so random i'm sure a story about fiona taking a shit could get featured
Buzz Lightyear is right, guys.
Kit, can I call you Kit? I'm going to call you Kit, I'm sure after all the comments on here I haven't bothered to read there isn't much I could say that wouldn't be repeating the above, so rock on I guess. You da man x
I haven't read 'These City Walls' since it was last updated and yet, it the the one fic that I constantly think about. Sure I read other fics for fun every now and then, but that one fic has captivated my imagination and is deeper than anything else I've read on this site. So if only two people will appreciate you I'd be glad to be one of those people.
Shine on you crazy diamond.
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I will write that story! Fiona must take shits. Plenty of shits.
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Buzz is ALWAYS RIGHT. ALWAYS. And yes, thanks buddy. I <3 you.
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Aww, thanks man. That's actually really touching. Well, I'm... trying to finish it, hahaha. I'm workin' on another epic right now, that will SURPASS THE DOOT out of it. YEAH. If you liked TCW, check it out. =3 And thanks so much for the support and all. I'm one reader closer to heaven now. ;_;