• Published 9th Jun 2022
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The Princess and the Kaiser - UnknownError



Princess Flurry Heart of the Crystal Empire and Kaiser Grover VI of the Griffonian Reich meet. They will reclaim their empires, no matter the cost.

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Part One Hundred

The projector switched to a more focused view of the Equestrian South, with the oil fields and rail lines marked across the peninsula. A red dot hovered along the line just below Army Group Center. The dot danced to Army Group South behind another line in the Southeast.

“We have nearly cut-off southern Equestria,” Field Marshal Bronzetail announced. He held the red crystal in one claw, tapping the end to make the small dot bounce across the projected map. “With the push across the heartlands, we’ve backed the bulk of the Heer away from their supply lines.”

The dot paused on a gap above Rockville, just at the edge of the enlarged map. “According to our scouts, the Changelings are attempting to mass a relief force to hold their final remaining railway up the coast to the rest of Equestria. We will strike hard and sever that, and once we do we’ve boxed in the Changeling Heer on land.”

“At sea,” High Admiral Raincrest continued, “the Changeling Kriegsmarine is left with Las Pegasus as their final major port in the south. Their submarines continue to harass our convoys. Once the south is cut-off on land, they will attempt an evacuation to the Olenian Peninsula.”

The projector switched back to the continent of Equus as a whole. There was a wide circle across the top of the landmass that every griffon tried to ignore. The frontlines began below it. Raincrest took the crystal from Bronzetail and the dot zagged between Las Pegasus, Vanhoover in northwestern Equestria, and Hjortland on the Olenian Peninsula.

“With Las Pegasus taken, we can expand operations to the Changeling Lands coast and contain their submarines,” Raincrest stated. He removed his blue cap and wiped his head feathers. “Fuel remains a concern.”

“Nearly half of Equestria’s oil is in the south,” Grover said dismissively. He had his claws clasped under his beak, propping up his head and the Reichstone atop it. The Kaiser of the Griffonian Reich lounged in a high-backed chair before the projector. His tail swung lazily, batting at one of the chair legs. “Once we have their oil fields, we force them to rely on the Olenian Protectorate.”

“My oil fields,” Princess Flurry Heart corrected from several chairs away. The alicorn had folded her white boots atop the table, high purple cap tipped back to show the jeweled crystal band beneath. “Under occupation.”

“I expect the Heer shall try to ignite your oil fields as they retreat,” Grover said languidly. He did not look to the Princess, remaining focused on the map.

“Just so,” Flurry agreed in Herzlander. “Speed is of the essence. How fast can your Reichsarmee fly?” She also stared at the projection. The alicorn was in full uniform for this meeting, and had brought a dozen of her high command with a large escort of guards.

The griffons and ponies in the room looked between the two royals sitting together, but several empty chairs apart.

“General Mudbeak?” Grover asked aloud. “The offensive is planned to start in two weeks. You are not burdened by storms in the south. I want Army Group Center under Field Marshal Bronzetail to mass brigades beyond Rockville to stall any breakout.”

The elderly Reichsarmee general nodded, wispy white mustache quivering atop his beak. “My Kaiser. It will be done.” He coughed into a cloth. “Your Reichsarmee is eager to move beyond the jungles. The roads are terrible, barely dirt. Those savages are our only recourse. They strip the Changeling dead for trophies and leave heads upon sticks.”

“The Tzinacatl are awesome, aren’t they?” Flurry chuckled. She tugged off a white boot with a flash of magic and rolled up her sleeve. She showed off the swirling, figure-eight scar just above her hoof. “Thestrals are the best nighttime fighters in the world.”

“Savages for a savage Princess,” Grover remarked. “I want to use them for a night assault.”

“Tlatoani Light Narrative has called the warbands. Does your little Reichsarmee need a helping hoof in the scary night?”

“They cannot fly faster than we can drive,” Grover dismissed. “Can your bat ponies even drive, or was that too much freedom pre-war?”

“Not much use of a car in a cave,” Flurry deadpanned. “How many of your soldiers know Equestrian? I sure as shit guarantee my Thestrals don’t know much Herzlander.”

“We have a contingent from New Mareland. They joined my army willingly, something your predecessors failed to achieve.”

“Oh?” Flurry whickered. “They clucked like chickens about fighting in a pony’s war until Beakolini came knocking. Glad they grew a spine.”

The griffons and ponies slowly shifted their heads between the two monarchs. The tension in the room had faded from simmering into a malaise of confusion. Sunset Shimmer shared a side-eye with Tempest Shadow from behind the alicorn.

“General Mudbeak,” Grover announced again. “Shift the New Marelander divisions against the frontline. Pair them with whatever tribal warbands the Tinacats scrounge together. They will spearhead the assault with light vehicles. Take the supply hubs in advance of the regular assault.”

“Tzinacatl,” Flurry corrected. Grover flashed a talon at her. The alicorn stuck her tongue out. Benito and Loudbark shared a look with pinned ears.

Grover waved a wing at one of the servants. The griffoness switched the projection back to the enlarge map of the south, then switched again to the supply hubs and major rail networks. Field Marshal Bronzetail took the crystal back from the admiral with a long look between the Princess and the Kaiser.

“We will…” Bronzetail hesitated, then rallied. “We will leave a corridor open to Las Pegasus to drive the Hegemony’s retreating forces into an opening. Once the south is completely cut-off, we encircle Las Pegasus. It is the next major city after Appleloosa.” The red dot danced on one railway from Appleloosa to Las Pegasus, then a road network.

“Why?” Flurry asked aloud.

“It is my design,” Grover answered. “We leave them an opening, and they have hope of escape across the sea. Civilians will flee and slow the retreat. Once we have taken Appleoosa and closed the pocket around Rockville, we can crush them at our leisure.”

“Do you have operational sea range to stop an evacuation?” Flurry asked dubiously. Baltimare was marked over on the map. “Tempest, Sunset, what do we know about Las Pegasus?”

“It’s the most important city of the Appleloosian Protectorate,” Sunset answered. “Major port for the Kriegsmarine with Admiral Mimic in the city. Governor Plexippus ruled from Appleloosa, probably evacuated by now.”

“Rockfeller’s the real power in the south,” Tempest added. “Rockfeller Oil owned all the major pumps during the war. Talked Chrysalis into keeping his share and expanding into Buffalo territory.”

“And the Buffalo?” Flurry asked mirthlessly.

Nopony answered.

“He hangs,” the Princess ordered absently.

“Whatever you do with your subjects is not my concern,” Grover refocused. “We will rely on air power to stop any sea evacuation. I need the oil fields and airfields intact. We have to move quickly while the rains stall the north.”

On cue, another clap of thunder rattled the boarded-up windows. Rain hit the slanted roof above the large meeting room with renewed vigor. The room paused for the noise to fade.

“Everyone leaves Canterlot by dawn,” the Kaiser ordered with a sweeping glance along the room. “We have dallied enough.” The Reichsarmee officers nodded.

“I need mages and the Imperial Guard,” Flurry stated in Equestrian. “We take up garrison duty and reintegrate territory as soon as possible. Archmage, I want ponies that can work with the Griffonian knight charters to clear the front. High Commander, focus on the mixed Imperial Guard before the Imperial Army. We’ll speak more on this before I leave.”

“As you say, Princess,” Tempest said softly.

“You intend to go to the front?” Grover asked idly.

“Yeah,” Flurry nickered. “Someone has to win this war for you. Not planning on disappointing my Thestrals.” She laced her boot and tapped it on the table.

“Do not die.”

“Could say the same to you,” Flurry quipped. “Maybe I’m immortal. Wouldn’t that be funny one day?” The alicorn raised a hoof before her muzzle. Her eyes turned serious, focusing on her hoof with intensity.

“Alas, poor Grover,” Flurry said in an awful approximation of a Griffenheim accent. “I knew him, Benito,” she winked over at the dog standing with crossed paws along the wall. Her muzzle suddenly scrunched and she frowned at her hoof.

Grover finally shifted in the chair to look at her blankly.

A pink wing fluttered. “Eh,” the alicorn snorted, “I’ll wing the rest. I forget how it goes. That one was boring anyway.” Her Herzlander returned to its ‘normal’ peasant-tinged, heavy Katerin accent.

“I am sure it will be a tale told by an idiot,” Grover rolled his eyes. “Full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”

Two feathers pointed at him. “I know that’s from one; I don’t remember which.”

Grover laughed, voice cracking deeper. “Dismissed.”

The ponies and griffons in the room shared a long, awkward look between themselves. The knights shifted their wings along the walls opposite the purple-clad crystal ponies. Jadis squinted across from Sir Geralt. He shrugged a wing.

“I said I’ll meet up with you later,” Flurry called out in Equestrian. “Get the fuck out, everypony. We got shit to do. We’re not figuring it out here.” The alicorn pushed herself free from the table, cracking her neck.

My Reichsarmee moves slowly today, Grover noted. “Dismissed!” he crowed out louder. Bronzetail and Mudbeak saluted at the front of the room, and the servant unplugged the projector with a wary glance at the alicorn stretching her large wings.

“Expect a courier with copies of the battleplans,” the Kaiser said over to her. Flurry Heart flapped the wing in acknowledgement before refolding it. “There will be more details once the frontline is organized from Stableside.”

“I’ll get moving down there tomorrow,” Flurry Heart planned aloud. “Meet up with the governors before they scatter and confirm quotas.”

“The Reconstruction Bureau will land in Manehattan once the frontline has advanced further.”

Flurry Heart groaned. “The Lord Regent will meet them here if I’m at the front.”

“We will speak further before you leave.” With Grover slouched in his chair with a folder of claw-written notes, the pony loomed over him several chairs away. He set the Reichstone on the table before craning his beak to look up at her muzzle.

“What?” the alicorn asked. Her horn glowed and she tugged her chair over.

“I meant later,” Grover rolled his eyes. “Not right now.”

She kicked the chair back against the table with a hind leg. “Oh, good. I’m hungry. The canned carrots in my room call to me.”

Grover made a disgusted croon in the back of his throat.

Flurry Heart flashed her flat, herbivorous teeth in something that could be charitably called a grin. Teeth that I watched grind down chicken wings. They were not sharp, and a duller white than her high collar. “Sorry you don’t have teeth,” the Princess said mockingly.

Grover splayed his talons out. “The Gods made a fair trade, I suspect.”

The alicorn followed her high command out. They had lingered to watch the exchange. Her crystal pony limped behind her with a long, cold look at Grover. Jadis, I think. I am certain they all know of the arrangement. Ancestors above, how many does she tell?

Grover looked to Benito. He stared back unblinkingly, though Loudbark had already left with the other Ironpaws. The room was quickly emptied, with the Equestrian and Imperial staff following their Princess to the other side of the castle. Rain echoed on the ceiling.

The Kaiser flipped open his folder of notes and reread them. It is a good plan, leaving a pocket encourages a retreat. Some will choose to run rather than try to fight to the death. Planes had already dropped the pamphlets of Princess Cadance and Twilight Sparkle weeks ago; the bombing runs had halted for the most part. The south needed to be intact.

Benito coughed into a gloved paw. He had advanced to the far side of the table. Grover looked up to see an Aquileian unicorn shuffling nervously beside the dog. The mare wore a black sash across her barrel, marking her as a trained mage from Aquila’s magic academy. “Yes?”

“We would like to scan the room for Changeling agents, my Kaiser,” the unicorn requested nervously.

“The Princess blasted magic through the room seven times,” Grover answered with a raised brow. “Aside from her Royal Advisor, there were none present.”

The unicorn bit her lip.

Grover waved a wing. “Go ahead.”

A half-dozen unicorns slowly circled the room while Grover reread his notes, making additional comments or scratching out something that was no longer relevant. A wing jittered as magic ran through his feathers, but he ignored it.

He ignored it the second time as well.

And the third.

The prodding of his tan head feathers tried his patience too far.

“Out.”

The six unicorns surrounding his table froze, eyes wide and tails swinging under their hind legs. Grover set his pen down and stared over the rims of his glasses. Benito looked away with another cough.

“Sir Geralt, please escort everyone out. I shall speak to Benito privately.”

“My Kaiser.” The remaining knights practically dragged the mages from the room, then departed themselves through the double doors. The meeting hall was silent now, except for the rain lashing the windows and roof. Another rumble of thunder echoed from the sky around the mountain.

Grover was alone with Benito. “Whenever you approach like this, it is always a poor conversation,” he repeated.

“As you say, my Kaiser.” The dog shifted his boots.

“Am I under some spell?” Grover asked sardonically.

“Not one we know of.”

“The Princess is not subtle,” Grover denied.

“She is an alicorn. There are magics beyond most that she may have-”

“For fuck’s sake,” Grover scoffed. “She took off her pants to show her cutie mark. That was it.”

Benito’s whiskers on the end of his muzzle curled, and his graying fur flushed in embarrassment. Still, the dog folded his arms and stared down at his sitting Kaiser. “You disappeared for some time.”

“I absconded from my guards to sit inside a tank,” Grover deadpanned. “That is a full accounting of my time. You answer to me, not the other way around.”

“What else was discussed beyond her mark?”

“Words.” Grover waved a claw. “Words are wind.”

Benito took a breath. “You…she insulted you.”

“And I insulted her.”

“You laughed.”

“Blessed Boreas,” Grover sighed in exasperation. “Am I incapable of laughter? Is that the Kaiser you want?”

“You understand how it looks?”

“I do not care how it looks.”

Benito reached into his coat and pulled out a folded sheet of paper. He smoothed it out before setting it on the table. Grover closed his folder and stared flatly at it.

It was a copy of the picture chosen for the front pages of several of the Reich’s largest newspapers. Flurry Heart stood with raised wings and a jeweled crown, clad in scarred, heavy crystal armor that put any of his knights to shame. It had been taken at the very end of the coronation, and the photographer managed to capture a bolt of lightning in the far distance from the window behind the alicorn. The banner of her fiery Crystal Heart was in the top left corner.

It was a perfect photograph of a conqueror. The last picture widely disseminated across the Reich was of her shaking hooves with President Blackpeak years ago, a tall gangly filly in a bright sunflower dress and swirly mane and tail. The alicorn had not grown that much, but her wings were certainly larger. Perhaps that is just because they are unfolded.

“What am I supposed to look for?” Grover asked aloud.

“My Kaiser,” Benito pleaded deferentially, “she is heading to fight with your Reichsarmee. You are not. Your griffons are simple.”

Grover laughed at the unintended insult. “And my dogs are not? You pride yourselves on your ‘simple’ loyalty to my family.”

“They see a warrior.”

Grover rolled wrist, inspecting the fine golden cufflinks of his shirt, then the sash of jingling medals, all of which he was awarded for simply existing. “I learned every language of my Reich,” he said in Wingbardian, “all to be told I should swing a sword harder. At the very least, Equestrians have a similar ignorance of history. Their Princess is from an empire lost to time.”

“Yes,” Benito acknowledged in Wingbardian. His eyes turned wry. “I have at least heard of The Taming of the Shrew…”

“Maar’s Daughter cannot be tamed,” Grover returned. He looked down at the photograph again. True, I could ask her not to fight. Perhaps she would even listen. The Crystal Heart was wreathed in flames upon the banner, and again upon her flank.

“It’s not a crown. No laurels. Ponies are desperate to believe I’m a Princess.”

A Princess did not stand before them, but she said she was one and they chose to believe she was. She was not smiling in the photograph, nor did she smile at any point in the coronation. She smiled in Aquileia. And in the tank. Grover tapped a talon on the wooden table, studying the picture. Her eyes are still the same.

“You have seen her mark,” Grover said aloud.

“Yes, my Kaiser. Not as clearly as you.”

He ignored the jab. “The Equestrian gods are not our Trinity, nor even the spirits of the borderlands that my ponies might believe in. Harmony? Whatever watches over Equus, it wants her to fight. It gave her the mark to do so.”

The Kaiser turned deep blue eyes up to Benito. “It is a force that banished a mare to the moon for a thousand years and defeated an incarnation of Maar in Discord. Shall I raise my wings and oppose that?”

“You are blessed by Boreas,” Benito tried.

Grover removed his glasses. The dog was close enough it was not an issue. “Boreas did not save my ancestor outside Azincork. He slaughtered his prisoners to win the day. I will not pick a fight I cannot win out of pride.” He glanced to the side. “I have armor back home, you know.”

Benito whined. “My Kaiser…”

“I am not going to the front,” Grover clacked his beak. “I am not a fool. Grover II took a spear to the face in a time of muskets and gunpowder. I can manage the war from the rear.”

The dog sighed in relief. “Just so, my Kaiser. You could do so from Griffenheim.”

“You complain the Princess is closer than I, then suggest I retreat further?” Grover questioned. He smoothed his head feathers down and popped his neck. A claw settled on the Reichstone.

“It is disconcerting to see you get along,” Benito finally admitted. “The ponies feel the same. The alicorns have always spit upon the Reich.”

“I struggle to imagine Celestia spitting on anyone,” Grover deadpanned.

“They recognized the fraudulent Griffonian Republic. They never approved of your ancestors, and only begrudgingly recognized them due to the Reich’s power.” The dog tapped a paw on the hilt of his sword. “I led your father and Eros from the mob when they stormed the Palace, watching the Archon scoop a frail griffon into his claws as we ran through the tunnels. The alicorns would have watched us hang from beyond the sea.”

Grover’s eyes darkened. “You stood beside Eros while Chrysalis came to drag a foal away. You intervened only because I commanded it. Do not lecture me on the moral failings of the past.”

Benito bit his lip and shifted his eyes to the wall. “As you say, my Kaiser.”

Grover returned to the photograph. Perhaps he should be insulted. Perhaps his ancestors would be insulted that the alicorn held her high horn above them and waved her larger wings, that she brought hundreds of griffons into the hall to proclaim her as their Princess of Ponies.

“I do not care,” Grover VI said aloud, and was surprised to find the statement true. “She will fight the army of the witch that killed her family, and I will marry a shieldmaiden of northern legends before the Trinity in Griffenheim. Let griffons crow about that.”

“If she survives,” Benito countered. “She is quite proud of that scar.”

“It’s self-inflicted,” Grover chuckled.

The dog shook his head. “Were all the alicorns mad?”

So were all the Grovers. The Kaiser set the Reichstone back on his head. Another peal of thunder rattled the windows. “I will need to meet with Mudbeak and encourage his departure south.”

“He intends to leave with all due haste, my Kaiser. His words.”

“His words are especially wind. Perhaps the Princess can teleport him.”

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