God Damn Kraut Took This Shit Apart
Who the fuck would disassemble a god damn motorcycle completely? Let alone, what kinda of fucker decides to bring said other fucker with his entire disassembled motorcycle over and plop it in the middle of the room? Well, who else would other than God himself.
When Patton heard the large crash coming from within the General's quarters, he entered the room to find 4 angry Germans, a heap of motorcycle parts, a large compliment of suitcases and clothes, and Chuck... standing behind the angry Germans, with a childish smirk on his face. At first, Patton did not know what the hell to make of it all and immediately went on his own tirade at Chuck on why the hell there was a heap of junk and 4 Germans in the general's quarters. It probably would've continued if Ike hadn't entered the room along with Bradley and Monty. But even then, Eisenhower was still surprised at the sight before him.
"Chuck... what the hell is all of this shit in front of my eyes? And why the hell are 4 Germans in here as well?" Eisenhower asked, gesturing towards the heap of motorcycle parts and the 4 Germans he did not even bother to look at.
"Oh, hey there Ike... meet your new tactical advisors." Chuck exclaimed, still wearing the childish grin on his face.
"What the hell do you mean tactica-" Eisenhower stopped when he finally bothered to actually look at the German's faces. From the sound of silence within the room, he could tell that everyone else noticed.
"Bloody hell..." He heard Monty mutter.
For a while, there was nothing but silence between the two groups until Patton finally spoke up, clearly still pissed at something.
"Chuck... they weren't on the list." Patton grumbled.
"Oh, I know that George, but consider them gifts!" Chuck said.
"Gifts Chuck? Okay, I understand why the hell you brought in Rommel but what the hell is Von Rundstedt doing here? Also... who the fuck are the other two anyways?" Patton asked, still pissed at the answer he got.
"Oh, well... that's quite simple really... You asked for a tactician, and I delivered! Consider Gause and Bayerlein as additional advisors." Chuck asked.
"Okay... I get that now, but why the hell is Rundstedt here if I may ask?" Eisenhower asked, clearly still confused about the whole situation.
"Simple, the Desert Fox here needs a handler!" Chuck said, eyeing Rommel at the same time.
"Ich brauche keinen Handler ... Ich bin ein Erwachsener, der perfekt in der Lage ist, meine eigenen verdammten Entscheidungen zu treffen." Rommel sneered in German, clearly pissed off at the comment.
"Oh... I forgot, translation issues." Chuck chuckled before snapping his fingers. "You were saying there Rommel?"
"I said that I do not need a damned handler... you know that very well." Rommel said in heavily accented English.
"Rommel, you nearly managed to get yourself and Gause behind enemy lines during Crusader, tried to dig tanks into the beaches, heck... your wife actually asked me to kick you out. The neighbors were getting noise complaints. Trust me... you need a handler."
As Chuck finished himself, one could here the chuckles of both Bradley, Patton, and even Bayerlein but earned two very pissed off looks from both Rundstedt and Rommel.
"Alright then... why am I his handler?" Rundstedt asked.
"Simple, you managed to keep him at bay somewhat in France and besides... consider this posting as your own penance for Babi Yar..." Chuck said, his face now very serious.
"I did not order my men to take part in that atrocity! I even ordered my soldiers to not take part in the killings under the SS! Rundstedt exclaimed.
"You still knew about it, and you still failed to do anything about it. You can't lie to me Von Rundstedt, I see anything and everything... don't ever forget that." With that, Rundstedt grew silent, but his face was still seething with anger.
"Okay then... thank you for that display but now can anyone tell me why the hell all this metal is here?" Bradley finally asked.
"Oh... you don't know?" Chuck asked.
"What do I not know? Please Chuck... enlighten me." Bradley said somewhat sarcastically.
"I think Gause would be better to explain this since he lived with the Rommels for a few years after his home was destroyed." Chuck said, pointing towards Gause.
"What do you want e to explain? The motorcycle parts?" Gause asked.
"What else would I want you to explain Gause? What, the argument your wife and Lucie Rommel had? C'mon..."
"Fine... alright. Well then General Bradley, what you see here before you is an example of one of my dear former commander's hobbies. In I think it was 1943, after our home was destroyed, Rommel here had invited me and my wife to stay at his new temporary home in Herrlingen. In the time we stayed there, I was told of a story during the years after the 1st Great War. Apparently, after he had relieved his first motorcycle, Rommel had taken it completely apart, and then completely rebuilt it just to see how it worked." Gause stated, his face never betrayed any emotion he truly had.
"So you mean to tell me that the reason why all this shit is here is because he was basically playing mechanic?" Patton asked.
"Oh... well, his wife wanted him out quickly so uh... I kind of just transported him and his mess here so that his wife wouldn't have to clean up the mess." Chuck admitted.
"You could have at least teleported this mess outside." Rommel muttered under his breath.
"You know I can here that Rommel." Chuck said, glaring at the former Field Marshal once again.
"It is not all that bad Erwin. The Americans had me act like I was working in one of their own depots as a mechanic." Bayerlein chirped in, clearly trying to calm down his former commander.
But Rommel didn't answer back to Bayerlein. For a while, all of the men in the room stood there in silence, clearly thinking about what their own position was. Surprisingly, the only one to really not even speak was Montgomery, something that the 3 Americans had noticed. But like all sentient life, they began to get restless in their silence. Surprisingly though, it was Chuck that broke the barrier that was holding them all back from speaking.
"If you jokers for generals are gonna stay quiet, I'm gonna take my leave now. Eisenhower, I trust that you will get your 4 new guests acquainted with their new surroundings as well as jobs of expertise?" Chuck asked.
"Oh for the love of your damn ass Chuck, just get out of here." Patton answered.
"I didn't ask you for your answer Patton."
"I don't care... I'm tired from the bullshit these ponies are giving us and I'd like to get this mess cleaned up before I turn in for the night." Patton answered rather angrily.
"You know what... I'll help you with that then." Chuck said before snapping his fingers, clearing up the mess of metal parts as well as removing himself from the room.
"Excuse me... did you say... Ponies?" Gause asked, clearly puzzled at what Patton had said. But before Patton could answer, the whole castle shook as a certain blue princess shrieked at the top of her lungs.
"WHO HAS TELEPORTED THIS HEAP OF JUNK INTO THE THRONE ROOM?"
At that point, only one word was said by Patton.
"Run..."
*** *** ***
There are many certain aspects of life that ponies can get accustomed to within Canterlot. Despite the overly extreme poshness of many of the ponies and nobles within the city, it was easy to get used to after a while. However, one aspect of life in the city was never something to get used to... the Royal Canterlot Voice.
What started out as a rather pleasant night for both Shining Armor and Sharpened Rapier had turned into much worse after Luna nearly woke up the entirety of the city. When they hurriedly managed to get the the throne room, they were shown a sight that many ponies feared to ever see. There, right before them... an extremely pissed off Princess Luna stood before a massive pile of junk and crafted metal. However, she was also confused which lowered the amount of anger that she was in.
"P-princess... we heard you scream... is everything alright?" Shining Armor asked, nervous of the response that was to be given to him by the angry Princess of the Night.
"Captain... rally the Guard... and find whoever holds this name..." She snarled out, lifting up a metal plate with words engraved on it. Looking closer, he could see the name imprinted within it.
Property of Erwin Rommel
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How have I not found this story sooner!
Insta read for me!
Oh it would have been even better if hube was there to support rommel haha
10230533
He would still be in hell for supporting Hitler and his militaristic plans and was an opponent of democracy and only lost faith in Hitler as the tide of the war turned against Germany.
Oh boy. Time for the Desert Fox to pull a ... speedy retreat.
Celestia: Let me get this straight. These new arrivals are from the other side of the conflict you fought in? What is Chuck playing at?
This is pretty funny. Put a watch on it and see where this goes.
10230696
Don't forget that their war criminals as well and if not at least did nothing to stop war crimes. Plus, they served a genocidal regime which would make Celestia and Luna wander what is Chuck's game.
Was Rundstedt actually complicit in the Final Solution, or did he turn a blind eye to it?
Several times in this chapter, you used "here" instead of "hear".
10230922
The major war crimes committed under Rundstedt's command were before he was sacked in 1941. The part about him ordering his troops to stop cooperating with the SS was true but it still happened anyways, even from his own direct subordinates. Later in the war... It is known that he knew of a multitude of plots against Hitler but unlike Rommel (who knew of the July 20th plot vaguely enough from Speidel), Rundstedt managed to keep under the radar and remain somewhat unassuming to the Gestapo and such.
10231010
Crap! I hate auto correct
10230614
Lol, it's El Alamein all over again but this time, he has no rearguard.
10231135
I doubt ANY rearguard would save him from "Wuna amger"TD
It's funny because while all these generals are great, what is really needed is actual enlisted training Sergeants and depot clerks trained and experienced in teaching up and supplying a Army. Not a bunch of tacticians and strategists. These are guys who look at the big picture but its usually enlisted personal that get the ball moving. I've known Colonels and Majors who barely understood the supply chain other than filling out requisition forms and signing there names.
Honestly at this point a bunch of Vietnam era Green Berets would be a good start.
10232630
Rommel + Supply = What, they were here a second ago...
Patton + Supply = I need more.
Montgomery + Supply = Okay, so... Try to minimize as much losses as possible.
Bayerlein + Supply = It all got destroyed by allied bombers.
Eisenhower + Supply = Sharing is caring.
Gause + Supply = I swear... Rommel was just here with it.
Bradley + Supply = I have some in reserve.
Rundstedt + Supply = Say goodbye Russians encircled in Kiev.
We need some training Sergeants, maybe some from Rhodesian, because they have some of the finest infantry, and tactics and training for infantry in the modern world. Plus we need some men in short
10236996
Hm... that gives me an idea..... Chesty Puller anyone?
10247415
If you want, I can try to find some name of famous Rhodesians.
Plus what about german general like von model, and Erich von Manstein?. If you want general from other armies, I have a list for you
Christian Frederik von Schalburg
Christian Peder Kryssing
Pyotr Wrangel
Lavr Kornilov
Roman von Ungern-Sternberg
Philippe Pétain
Charles de Gaulle
Ferdinand Foch
Why don’t you bring action on Bismarck next
Actually that would work out nicely he is a master diplomat and Uniter of Germany