Just Another Great Day In The Office
Three days.... It had taken 3 days just to make the clean out the shit stains from the toilets. It took an additional two more days just to make the actual building viable for occupation. Still though, one had to enter the building wearing a face mask just to keep healthy.
Throughout the early hours of the morning, Monty, Shining Armor, Sharpened Rapier, and a few hand-picked staff officers from the guard spent the entire morning placing scented candles in every corner of the building just to replace the smell before they got to work organizing the files. That all on it's own called for several coffee breaks from each and every member of the group... So much so that they had to take all the coffee from the officer's club just to keep going through the morning.
Every now and then, Eisenhower would check in and sometimes try to pitch in as best as he could but he never really could stay long as he still had a leash to keep a hold on Patton as Bradley couldn't do everything like Ike did to keep Patton in line, no matter how hard he tried. At one point, even Luna came in for a few minutes but that was before the candles were all lit and the smell around the still quarantined and soon to be completely demolished bathroom was still... Lingering to say the least. Skipping to the end of that ordeal... Her breakfast decided to take the fast lane upwards. It was only midday when Monty finally was able to go over papers concerning the administration of the Royal Guard with Shining Armor and the others when the first discretion was spotted in the paper work.
The first paper he had picked up from the massive pile was titled "Requisition Form for Vacation Leave Pay". Almost immediately, he cringed as he read over the document. Apparently, said if said document was filled out, one would receive back-pay while vacationing for the standard 2 weeks. How the hell the guard already did not have a back-pay system was beyond Montgomery and even Shining Armor since he claimed that there was a back-pay system well established well before he even was born. The whole entire ordeal was simply rotten. What he did not know though, was the heated debate that was being had between Eisenhower and the princesses.
*** *** ***
Throughout the course of his life... Eisenhower had to argue sense into either those unwilling, those unknowing, or simply those too stupid to comprehend what things meant. With what he was dealing with currently however... he had no idea to do with excuses and nonsense the Princesses were currently giving him.
The whole original purpose of him meeting with the Princesses was to discuss the matter of creating a full blown standing army for Equestria as it was clear that in the event Equestria was ever even invaded, the small and (not right now) elite component of the Royal Guard would not be able to so much as even survive a small skirmish with any sort of enemy force. However, each time he tried to press the matter of it, he was always deflected by some sort of excuse whether it be by possible infringement from the Noble Council, even further centralization which would anger said nobles, or simply not enough money to do such a thing. However, that last one was complete and utter nonsense as Equestria was able to field a rather strong navy (somewhat on the lines of the early 20th century British and German Fleet in terms of size and capabilities) with a rather large budget to compliment it as well. He had the eerie sense that he was simply being bullshitted.
"Alright... I am going to ask you again... and I WANT a straight answer this time. Have I made myself clear?" Eisenhower said, now wearing a facial expression he would normally give to Patton whenever he fucked up.
"Straight answers... got it." Celestia said, nodding her head with her sister.
"Now... why the hell do you guys NOT want to form a standing army. And don't give me the excuses you gave me before because we all know those were horseshit excuses." He deadpanned.
"Well... you see General... we cannot really form an army because..." Celestia stumbled out before pausing, as if trying to make up another excuse. If she was trying to hide it, it was not working because her face was showing a rather nervous expression.
"Well... spew it out now..." Eisenhower said, waiting for the answer.
"Well... the whole matter is extremely complicated as um..." Before Celestia could say anything else, Luna finally decided that enough was enough apparently and put her hoof in front of her sister.
"What my sister is trying to say is that well... the whole entire process would simply be too bureaucratic and both her and I are not exactly sure if the public opinion would be in favor of joining an army and possibly being sent to die in the event of a war." Luna admitted.
"Wait... I get the first part... but why the hell would ponies join the navy if the second part were true? I mean... I am sure a bullet to the brain would probably be better than simply drowning slowly on a sinking ship." Eisenhower said, earning a thoughtful yet nervous look from Celestia and Luna (the latter not really nervous at all).
"That.... is a matter I never really thought of..." Celestia admitted.
"Good... I am glad we have made progress. Now, what bureaucratic red tape is set up against forming a standing army?" Eisenhower asked. Celestia was about to answer until Luna popped out of the room and almost immediately, came back in with a large binder. Taking a quick look inside, Eisenhower could see that this was the "bureaucratic red tape" that was standing up against creating a standing army, along with a large amount of old laws that were never repealed or updated helping with said Red Tape. Turning to the princesses, he could see that Luna had a blank look on her face while Celestia nervously smiled, knowing the mess her reign had caused in the 1000 years Luna was gone.
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Yeah... what will the elements think of this?
Fluttershy will have a heart attack.
Oh boy, red tape that will be fun. I have an idea of who else you can bring in. Instead of a German considering, they lost how about bring in Rokossovsky who was a successful planner and commander who helped destroy the Army Group Centre with Operation Bagration.
Before I read this, I must know:What took them so long?
So the navy is not a fucking mess? Ok now this is the element of this fic that I needs my biggest suspension of disbelief... can we please get an explanation on how the navy managed to survive the administrative mess that is the arm forces?
If you do not bring in Gunny I will be disappointed.
10219200
yes.
Who would have thought that you need somewhat workable bureaucracy to form and maintain army, right?)
I suspect following action would be removing 1000 years old legal tumors. Normally such results in problems with nobility and ruler replacement, but Equestria has a bit different situation: princesses do not rely on nobility to maintain in power like rulers on Earth.
10219182
The baby situation will be explained in later chapters but to put things lightly... Don't ever mess with a sailor or try to short change them, especially when your trade lifeline is on the line and always at risk or piracy.
10218904
I was actually gonna bring in Zhukov, especially since him and Eisenhower were more or less friends... Or at least on pretty good terms.
10219200
Nah Montgomery could be a good general as shown at El Alamein but a bad one as well as seen in Market Garden. The guy was very cautious and preferred to move at a slow but steady pace which allowed Rommel to escape.
10219371
Now... Call me a wehraboo but I believe that Monty was good at overall grand strategy and brilliant at logistical planning but was not exactly good when it comes to fighting an actual battle at the front. This can be seen by how during the 2nd battle of El Alamein, the Germans and Italians held them up for quite a while, and the subsequent failures of Montgomery to truly capitalize moments where he could've encircled Rommel but instead neglected to do so at the right time and fell victim to the rather brilliant rear guard actions made by the Afrika Korps. Market Garden simply sums this up completely with his short comings as a field general. Also... In British army circles, he was known to be "not a very nice man" and quite an egotistical one sided jackass with no sense of diplomacy what so ever.
10219417
Him, McArthur and Clark were some of the most egotistical generals among the Allies. Maybe you should bring in Marshall since the guy was great organizing and equipping the US army during ww2.
Just burn it, that book is almost impossible to repeal. Act like it doesn't exist and burn it.
10322309
no, get discord to make it so it never existed