Anthology of Graybles

by Str8aura

Trick Or Treat (AJ, Dash; Comedy)

"There's a... There's a girl in that tree."

"Yes, I know."

"Is she... Is she with you?"

"Yes. Ignore her. I have no idea what she's doing."

Irma had several questions, and none of them looked like they would be answered soon. Moving into a new town took a lot out of her, and she hadn't exactly been looking forward to the hordes of kids that would be undoubtedly swarming her porch this Nightmare Night. For better or for worse, she didn't have to deal with them. Instead, she was met at her door with what she could only assume were two grown women; Assumed because one of them was hiding in her tree and one of them was larger than her house.

Irma nodded sagely as if she understood. Reverting to autopilot in her haze, she reached for the discount mixed bags of chocolate bars she had spent less than ten dollars on, pulling in a handful without care for rationing. A large head came down in front of her doorway, obscuring the view outside with a tiny jack-o-lantern basket gripped in its teeth. A gust of exhaled air swept over Irma as she kept her eyes closed, spilling name brand candy bars into the basket and closing the door.

Less than a second after it was closed it caved inwards, the doorknob popping out of its hole.

---*---

"What was your plan there, exactly?"

"You were going to lean down with your basket, she'd give you some candy, and I'd *swoop* down and shovel it out of her hooves before she could! Then, I'd fly out of sight before she could see who it was!"

"You did great. Really nailed the part where you miss completely."

Dash pouted, hugging her basket tight. She sat perched on the edge of AJ's muzzle as she carried her through the dirt paths, carefully sidestepping the kids screeching and scurrying around her legs.

Nightmare Night was in full swing, kids and adults alike taking enjoyment from the holiday, although the adults mostly for the fact that it was one of the least marketed holiday around, and the pressure to show generosity was non-existent. In the case of the kid currently sitting on AJ's nose however, just as the kids running beneath her, tonight was a night to dress up as something stupid and gorge with no societal repercussions. Not that she wouldn't try the same every other night.

In a stroke of charisma largely aided by Dash's unique ability to hold on to an argument with a ferocity not normally seen outside of rabid chihuahuas, she had somehow convince Applejack to dress up alongside her- Dash as a space pilot from a name brand non-imitable sci-fi series, and AJ as one of the giant walker robots they apparently fought, as she was enthusiastically filled in about the night before.

And so she tolerantly marched through the streets with painted cardboard boxes strapped to her, carrying the expression of a man with their head in a guillotine, if that man had been pressured into doing so by their guillotine loving daughter.

Citizens began noticing their walk from their porches, nudging and pointing with a range of emotions from fear to excitement. Dash made no move to quench their attention, leaping off her muzzle theatrically and flying loops over and under AJ as she pursed her lips and kept her eyes trained forward. As they passed by the crowds, Dash happily flew up to Applejack's ear, still looping head over heels.

"Alright, now this time I'll go knock on that door and hide, she'll come out, think she's been ding-dong ditched, and you lean down suddenly and screech in her face!"

"I will not."

"Please! For me!"

She didn't wait for an answer, zooming away and landing in a crouch at the front door. Army-crawling forward, she reached up and knocked twice, leaping up and flipping around to land on the edge of the house, striking her best gargoyle pose.

The door opened. The owner leaned out, raising a ticked eyebrow at the lamp-lit void before them. Before they could return inside, AJ leaned down with the most passive expression she could muster. She didn't have to try very hard.

"Howdy."

They screamed louder than anything AJ could make intentionally. A space pilot mysteriously fell out of the sky to the concrete between them. She screamed louder.

---*---

Crowds of people whooped and hollered loudly as the valiant spaceman barely evaded the mech of the evil Vietnam metaphors. She zipped back and forth between searing hot lasers being fired by enraged, faceless black cloaked men. Sound became a suggestion as she broke barriers, looping around the mech's legs bajillions of times in a row, tying them together in a split second before streaking back into the sky.

Applejack lamented her physical ability to bring her hoof to her face as Dash did stunts to the crowds. If she could actually fire lasers from the cardboard tubes on her head, the daredevil would've been dead seven times in a row.

"Avast. You have defeated me. You brave beautiful bastard."

"That's right! Take pictures everybody, you'll want records of this momentous event! Nothing can outrun me!"

Dash was blowing kisses to the ecstatic crowd, winking for photo flashes.... directly in front of Applejack. Biting her lip, she shifted her footing in the ropes quietly,locking onto her target. Rocking back and forth steadily, not enough to attract attention, gaining traction, losing footing, until....

The swarms suddenly parted, leaving Dash hovering in the air, confusedly turning around.

Her expression two inches away from AJ's face was worth the entire night and 364 more.

---*---

"Are we coming up on a house?"

"Maybe. Maybe not. Who's to say?"

"Come on, listen, I've got another idea; put your head in front of the door, open your mouth, and I'll lean out to get the candy. Their face will be great!"

"Maybe I'll just take us home."

"Please! I'll give you all of my candy. All of it."

AJ rolled her eyes, begrudgingly walking up the lawn with her head hung low. Stamping her hoof on the concrete loudly enough to attract attention, she brought her head to the ground.

"Is someone coming?" Dash's muffled voice called out. "Don't say anything, just nod yes or-"

AJ swallowed as the door opened, expertly catching the jack-o-lantern basket on her tongue and bringing it to her teeth.

"Trick or Treat."

---*---

For a grand second time that night, Dash was pouting while AJ bit back laughs. Occasionally, Dash would stop and attempt to shake off her drenched fur before quickly giving up.

"That wasn't very funny, AJ."

"Now I'm not allowed to have fun?"

"Alright, listen, new plan; I'll sneak up through the back door while you distract them at the front door. I-"

"That's breaking and entering. Also you won't be able to sneak; they'll smell you from a mile away."

"Yeah, only because you stink inside!"

"You should've thought of that beforehand. Maybe we should just trick or treat normally?"

"No, No, here's a better one: You sit up on the roof, and I'll knock on the door, and then... hold on, I'm thinking..."

Applejack groaned as audibly as she could.

Author's Note:

The picture that prompted it