I am so glad you updated. And I'm so glad Luna is actually going Trixie a chance. I wonder how long will it take for Trixie to adjust to her new scedule? BTW:
Luna adjusted her hooves to gaze at her mentor while still half awake.
I thought Trixie was the student and Luna was the mentor.
well, i found out something new today! hasbro has horrible eyes! it's obviously white, but that's just my opinion, right? okay then! from now on, i'll say pale cornflower!
I usually don't give reviews until the story is complete, but at this stage I will give you an unofficial review. You need to proofread or have someone do it for you, you need to up character development rate, add clearer time and location changing phrases, and make longer chapters. This caliber of fimfic seems to work well if you make it 2500 words. In the end, it's about progress and stirring emotions in your readers. I feel like I read a paragraph explaining how Luna is impatient with a determined but subpar Trixie, and also she got a room. That's it? Art Inspired, I am very familiar with your work and it is normally above average. What happened to this fic?
1241042 To be honest... I'm not that into this one! At first, I was like awe yeah, a Lunixie! but now... It's just drab. I'll still work on the importance of mood, feel and flow, but for the most part... the feeling I thought I would enjoy isn't going so well... I need to get my mind set in the right mode for this one, otherwise, it's going to start having bad description and upsetting progression. Thank you kindly for the feedback. Much appreciated!
1243020 Lol. I just realized I made that typo, sorry. It managed to elude both spell-check and myself. I've fixed it; I promise that was not intentional.
TRIXIE!!
get some sleep!
1226202
Fitting story. Oh, and Samuel L. Jackson.
hooray for twixie!!!
Your relieves you said "hearing this struck fear into the white mare's heart" It was only luna and trixie
1226365 i think i fixed it... i thing. the 's thing always confuses me.
1226438....Yeah...hope you did
1226446well, i just changed it to "trixie's"... sould it be trixie'? i don't know! the apostraphy is so confusing.
1226456 first you said your struck fear into the WHITE mare's heart so just change it to the BLUE mare's heart
1226473 i said white MANED mare's! her MANE is white!
1226480 Trixies Mane is not white!
1226483<- that's not white? her mane, also known as pony hair isn't white? you need to get your eyes checked!<_< looks white to me!
I am so glad you updated. And I'm so glad Luna is actually going Trixie a chance. I wonder how long will it take for Trixie to adjust to her new scedule?
BTW:
I thought Trixie was the student and Luna was the mentor.
1226586...phhh... BWAHAHA! oh, sweet celestia! oh, i goofed that up so badly!... oh, i'm so sorry!... okay! it's been fixed.
1226495 It's ALMOST white. Looks light blue to me.
1226712this is blue.
this is white!
she had blue streakes running through the middle, but their a very light blue, but for the most part, it's white, so i'll say white! thank you!
1226768
ORLY?
i.imgur.com/iAkDc.png
I now own you.
1226952 the turth BURNS!
well, i found out something new today! hasbro has horrible eyes! it's obviously white, but that's just my opinion, right? okay then! from now on, i'll say pale cornflower!
1226952 btw, NOPONY OWNS ME!
SSP: NOPONY OWNS MY ART INSPIRED BUT ME!
1227012 In your defense, it's VERY pale cornflower which is probably as close to white as damnit is to swearing... but still not quite.
Ok sure *implants an obedience chip inside you*. Whatever you say.
1227043 I am the metal. Your chip is useless!
1227064 Exactly what I programmed you to say!
1227111 did you program me to say this? ... bend over!
1227150 Sorry, I'm a bit kinky.
1227164 rapeface engaged...
1226495 to be anoying its actualy "Pale cornflower blue" and "Very pale cornflower blue"
You can see it here Trixie XD
1236360 not that, thats just how i say trixie sometimes
1238936 Later on, you'll see it.
1226952
ready-up.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/Objection-550x406.png
That is a wiki. The information on it can be false. Since It's not official, it could EASILY have been messed with.
1238940
I usually don't give reviews until the story is complete, but at this stage I will give you an unofficial review. You need to proofread or have someone do it for you, you need to up character development rate, add clearer time and location changing phrases, and make longer chapters. This caliber of fimfic seems to work well if you make it 2500 words. In the end, it's about progress and stirring emotions in your readers. I feel like I read a paragraph explaining how Luna is impatient with a determined but subpar Trixie, and also she got a room. That's it? Art Inspired, I am very familiar with your work and it is normally above average. What happened to this fic?
1241042 To be honest... I'm not that into this one! At first, I was like awe yeah, a Lunixie! but now... It's just drab. I'll still work on the importance of mood, feel and flow, but for the most part... the feeling I thought I would enjoy isn't going so well... I need to get my mind set in the right mode for this one, otherwise, it's going to start having bad description and upsetting progression. Thank you kindly for the feedback. Much appreciated!
1238963 You're so dumb you must be a high school teacher. The wiki is right, and if you look closely enough at her mane you can see the blue tint.
So sit down and shut up, Phoenix. Case closed.
1241799
Why you so mad?
Just have an opinion, man, Chillax.
1241847 I'm not mad, I'm disdainful. Know the difference.
1241847>>1241860
images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/30700000/INTERNET-FIGHT-my-little-pony-friendship-is-magic-30752631-480-270.gif
1241878
What?
1242890 Mods must have removed it.
1242947
Removed what?
1241860
Also, I just want to know why you had to curse at me. I just had a differing opinion. So let's all just be gentlemen and agree to disagree.
1243013 The meme I posted.
1243076
WHICH WAS?!
1243104 Internet fight.
1243118
What fight? We resolved this peacefully.
1243150 SuperChaosKG... Thinks he resolved his problem which he never did!
1243165
Sir. Don't start with it. Don't even.
I don't need to do this.
I edit ERB. I refuse to allow you to do this.
1243177 SuperChaosKG... thinks i'm being serious, when really I'm just insanely bored. he should see this funny video!
1243205
I seen the Bloody Video! I subscribed to him!
1243020 Lol. I just realized I made that typo, sorry. It managed to elude both spell-check and myself. I've fixed it; I promise that was not intentional.
1243591
The cursing was a typo? Okay then.
Oh, by the way,
TR-TR-TRIPLE COMBO!!
Well, Trixie is doomed.