Day 5 part 3 End of Day 5
“Thank you for your help Ethan, once again the Brotherhood is in your debt.” Elder Lyons said with a weary sigh.
“Anytime Elder, I live to help in times of need.” Ethan replied with a shrug.
“I looked over that report that you filed and I must say that I am very disturbed by your description of this mutant Dominus, he appears to be far more dangerous than any mutant we’ve faced since the Master himself.” Lyons said with a frown.
“Yeah, I’m actually not too worried now that I know what to expect, he seems to be your normal run of the mill mutant conqueror. What I’m more worried about is the fact that there was a group of Talon Company mercs after Twilight the first day after she showed up, which means that someone knew that she was coming.” Ethan said with a frown.
“How could they’ve?” Lyons asked. “You yourself only ran into her because of pure luck correct?” Lyons asked in confusion.
“Yeah I don’t understand it; I’m going to be talking to Commander Jabsco about it.” Ethan said with a dark smile.
“Do you really think it wise to forget about the mutant threat?” Lyons asked Ethan with a hard look.
“It’s not that I’m forgetting, it’s that I don’t want an unexplained variable running around causing Twilight problems, something’s fishy about this sir, and I hate fish.” Ethan told the Elder who sighed.
“Very well, if you think that that’s the best thing that you could be occupying your time with.” Lyons replied fixing Ethan with a heavy stare.
“Trust me Elder we decimated most of his forces here he’s fallen back to somewhere safe where he can lick his wounds, now is the time for Twilight to get some answers.” Ethan replied. “I owe her that much at least.” He added thinking about how the mare was currently lying unconscious in the Brotherhood clinic.
“She is certainly a very talented young woman, and if anyone deserves to be free of this brown wasteland it’s her.” Lyons continued with a sigh. “Do as you will Ethan, just come back soon, I doubt that we could kill this Dominus without you.”
“Don’t worry Lyons I’ll be back.” Ethan told Lyons before extending his hand to shake the old man’s.
They shook once (Ethan noticed that the old man’s grip was as strong as ever) before Ethan exited the room and made his way to the infirmary. When he got there Twilight was still asleep so he pulled out an old Grognak the Barbarian comic and read while he waited for the purple mare to awaken. He must have waited around half an hour before a low groan announced that Twilight had returned to the land of the living.
“Evening sleepyhead how’re you doing Sparky?” Ethan asked as the unicorn slowly sat up.
“Make the loud noises go away.” Twilight groaned.
“HEY SPARKY ARE YOU AWAKE YET?” Ethan shouted causing Twilight to grasp her head in pain, Ethan winced. “Sorry Sparky, so how do you feel?” He asked her as she turned to look at him.
“I’m fine… ugh it feels like someone’s been banging on my head with a hammer for an hour.” Twilight said with another groan. “Goddesses I hate magical exhaustion.” She added as she took a sip out of the aqua pura bottle that Ethan offered her.
“Magical exhaustion?” Ethan asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Yeah magical exhaustion, it’s basically like a hangover but with less alcohol and no odd conversations with your friend’s brother about how you and your friend got really loud…” Twilight said and then covered her mouth in surprise while Ethan smirked.
“And here I was thinking that you were a virgin this whole time.” Ethan told her with a chuckle.
“I never said that, I just said that I didn’t want Celestia to be alone forever. I never turned down a good time when it was with someone I trusted; besides alcohol makes good social lubricant.” Twilight said with a smirk.
“Tell me about it, this one time I threw a merc party for all of my mercenary friends. The next morning I awoke to Sidney and Riley snuggled up on either side of me it was great…till they woke up… as it turns out that they were rivals in the merc business. Long story short my house got trashed and I had to run out of it naked in front of the entire town while two incredibly angry women chased me, good times.” Ethan replied with a smile.
“This was before you were married right?” Twilight asked.
“Yeah, Cassandra would literally skin me if she caught me cheating on her.” Ethan replied.
“Neat, I’ve always wanted a human skin carpet!” Twilight told Ethan with a wide smile.
“No you don’t, trust me it’s not very soft and it smells bad.” Ethan replied.
“I’m sure that given the proper treatments it would smell like a bed of roses.” Twilight said giving Ethan a smirk.
“You know Sparky I’ve been wondering, do unicorn horns grow back?” Ethan suddenly asked Twilight with a wide smile.
“No…why?” Twilight asked her eyes suddenly narrowing.
“Well you see I’ve always been a little worried about someone poisoning me, and according to legend if you cut off a unicorn’s horn and turn it into a cup it’ll prevent all poisonings.” Ethan told her with a wider smile. “And you know I was just thinking that we’re in an infirmary…”
“OH HELL NO!” Twilight shouted blasting Ethan off of his chair and into the wall he slumped to the floor laughing uproariously.
“Oh my god Twilight, you should’ve seen your face!” He shouted before collapsing back into hysterical laughter.
“What the hell is going on in here?” Sarah Lyons demanded from the doorway.
“Nothing Sarah, I just made Twilight aware of the old practice of cutting off unicorn horns as a way to prevent poisonings.” Ethan replied with a chuckle.
“Christ Ethan…” Sarah said with a sigh before walking away.
“You know I’m joking, right Sparky?” Ethan asked the unicorn whose fur was standing on end and bristling in a slightly cat like manner.
“Ethan if you ever, EVER, talk about cutting off my horn I’m castrating you.” Twilight replied without looking at him. Ethan gulped; even he wasn’t immune to that particular threat.
“Duly noted…” He replied. Twilight turned to face him with a giant smirk on her face.
“Point, Twilight.”
“Son of a bi-”
***
“Um Dash, what’re we going to tell your friends?” Gilda asked hesitantly in-between bites of her drumstick.
“That we’re together again and you’re going to apologize for them for being a bitch.” Dash replied as she tried to return her mane to its normal messy form, for some reason whenever she and Gilda had sex her hair got all straight and nasty.
“Fine… who should we start with?” Gilda asked with a sigh.
“Probably Pink-”
“Hi Dash!” Pinkie said from behind them making Dash and Gilda jump in surprise.
“Pinkie how the buck did you get up here?” Dash asked
“Silly filly I just climbed up the stairway to heaven, jumped off it, got some help from Anonymous who got thrown through the warp again by his Celestia and then I asked Captain Planet for help and we fought eco-terrorists until I got hit by an energy beam that transported me to the future where Vandal Savage helped me go back in time but I ended up in the middle of the desert until I got a lift from the Planet Express crew before they dropped me off with Harry Potter who gave me some flu powder which sent me to see the other Harry who gave me a ride through the Never Never and then I was in Atlantis with Milo and he used a crystal to transport me back here but I got interrupted along the way and ran into Blackjack and we went on a drunken adventure and then her spleen called her a cunt and she got into an argument with it and then I got hit by a spell that sent me to help Commander Shepard fight the Reapers…” Pinkie went on like that for around four minutes… “And that’s how I got here just in time to give you this really long explanation.” Pinkie finished with a smile.
“Is she insane?” Gilda asked.
“Na she’s just random.” Dash replied with a shrug.
So i'm sure you're all wondering how the whole Gilda Dash thing went, well you're in luck because I have Pinkie Pie here to explain it.
Okay so first Dashie was all like 'Gilda what are you doing here' and then Gilda said 'Dash i'm dying you have to have sex with me!' and then Dashie said 'What is love?' and they sang both parts and then they both cried and then Dashie grabbed her in a deep embrace which was romantic and stuff and then they fucked!
*cough, clears throat* Thank you for that wonderful description Pinkie.
anytime Ed, now where do you keep your cupcakes?
I don't have any right now, try again tommorow
Oh and sorry for the general shortnish I'm in a hurry to wrap up this day
Oh god, Pinkie's description!
1233496
Which one?
1233502
1233502 *Hits you in the head with a Barret M82 A1 round*
1233539
*robotic voice* We appologize for the delay but actual comments must be posted before any combat takes place, we once agian apologize for the inconvince
GOD DAMMIT PINKIE! TRAVELING THOUGH THE MULTI VERSE IS NOT SUPPOSE USED AS A TAXI.
christ we have to fix these walls AGAIN. before the universes collapsees AGAIN.
but in other news awesome chapter keep em rolling
1233583
If you didn't want the walls to collapse you should've made them thicker, or maybe stickier...
1233558 He's trying to kill both of us! I only helped you because of those pesky flood that attacked us! He shot my ear off.
1233601
I hope you've learned a valuable lesson about friendship my friend
You have it all wrong, Applejack was the one who got sent to kill the Reapers.
1233619
I did hear something about that, but remember she got sent home before she could do much
1233593 'goes crying in a corner mumbling to himself'
there suppose to be unbreakable buuuuuut noooo SOME PEOPLE breck the wall for the lolz.
I'M LOOKING AT YOU PINKIE
'continues crying'
1233631
I think she hit on him and the combined force of the fandom cheering as the fourth wall was torn apart as all the other LIs joined in on a catfight for him broke it and she got sucked in.
1233614 Nope.
1233634
Oh no I didn't mean to make you cry! Please stop crying I was just pointing out that they could be thicker, and if you added a layer of frosting or something else sticky and sweet i would be to busy licking them to break them!
1233661 hmm GENIUS
in honor of this idea i propose a PARTY!!!
in dreams
Luna:shining is twilight allright
Shining:well she can kick my flank blindfolded if thats anything now
1233684
This will be the most awomse party ever!
1233695
admit it you jelly
1233808
I prefer this version
1233879 haha nice
Short chapter is short.
I can't wait 'till Shining slearns about Twi's body count.
Pinkie Pie and commander shepherd team up. They get the shit beat out of them by shepherd then mindfucked by Pinkie Pies defying of physics.
I honestly don't get the 'point, twilight' thing. How does tat make him a sonuva beetch
1234572
They were having a verbal duel, Twilight actually made Ethan scared for once, thus she gave herself a point, the son of a bitch was Ethan's response when he reilized that she'd tricked him
You fucking rock.
1235124
Thanks I try
1235072 ah. Completely missed that. It was midnight after conditioning st my school and two karate classes. I'm giving myself a pass.
1235893
We all have those moments bro
1235933 Pinkie had a party with the Queen of Whiskey. Until Deus' spleen started insulting her. Really, I only have one response:
Thank God Pinkie didnt show up at the MoM facility in Manehattan. Finding your own incinerated skeleton with a bullet hole through the skull would bring Pinkamena back to life. FOREVER.
Favs today... hopes for new chappie tomorrow.
123331630.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ktl51jzqZL1qa2q7do1_400.jpg
That ending was flippin brilliant. Onward to the next day!
I tried to keep reading, but this is how far i can go without throwing my hands in the air with frustration.
The rough and creative language they throw out is really putting me off. And i don't mean Ethan and crew either.
Maybe it is simply because I see it from a childish view or something, but i can at least understand Twilight, but it seems too much really. Its very well written, but i can't keep reading this.
In my mind, Twilight should of been traumatized by everything she see and experience, but yours just takes it like a soldier and moves on. I don't know what universe this Twilight hails from, but fuck me if I ever pissed her off enough for her to throw me through a wall as a response.
It doesn't deserve a down vote, but i can't read this anymore, and i really tried to give it a chance.
Motha F-ing references!!!
Shepard and Pinkie...Harbinger, start counting, your days are numbered.
Oh man.
Mass Effect was fun.
BUT PINKIE IN IT.
PINKIE SHEPARD.
MASS EFFECT PLAYTHROUGH OF PINKIE SHEPARD COMING SOON.
I kinda hate Pinkie's fourth-wall breaking in many stories. In some, it is used as a plot element, or as a subtle joke once in a while, but sometimes it's just over-excessive, which IMO is the case here. Sorry, but that last part kinda ruined the chapter for me.
Pinkie's adventure sounds awesome!
"“Is she insane?” Gilda asked."
*reads*
no,her blood is jet mixed with a dozen other chems and her brain is made of LSD.
Pinkie fought reapers with Commander Shepard AND went on drunken adventures with Blackjack?!
... Lucky...
why is pinkie pie, pinkie pie. BITCH, BECAUSE SHE'S PINKIE PIE. why did pinkie pie go on adventures with Shepard. NIGGA, BECAUSE SHE'S PINKIE PIE
enough said right
"........."
i thought so
Silly filly I just climbed up the stairway to heaven, jumped off it, got some help from Anonymous who got thrown through the warp again by his Celestia and then I asked Captain Planet for help and we fought eco-terrorists until I got hit by an energy beam that transported me to the future where Vandal Savage helped me go back in time but I ended up in the middle of the desert until I got a lift from the Planet Express crew before they dropped me off with Harry Potter who gave me some flu powder which sent me to see the other Harry who gave me a ride through the Never Never and then I was in Atlantis with Milo and he used a crystal to transport me back here but I got interrupted along the way and ran into Blackjack and we went on a drunken adventure and then her spleen called her a cunt and she got into an argument with it and then I got hit by a spell that sent me to help Commander Shepard fight the Reapers… I LOVE YOU NOW!!!! NICE ONE AUTHOR!!! Blackjacks argument is the best part
Milo as in Milo from Atlantis? I loved that movie.
4414365 eff yeah! have an internet cookie for being awesome!
References on top of references sprinkled over a nice bowl of references with a reference-based chocolate syrup to top it all off.I was keeping track of the number of references,but, Pinkie just made me lose count.
SO MUCH WIN WITH THIS STORY.
4514111 Yeah people who know that movie!
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