Generosity
Slowly I blinked awake and sat up, I felt strange this morning...stranger than the alien body I'm imprisoned in which is crazy to think about, but still I felt strange.
I was awake yet my eyes felt closed...I was standing but I still felt like I was lying in bed...I could move but...it felt numb...I felt so uncomfortable, moving my limbs I tried to get some more feeling in them but it was still slight numbness.
Trying to distract my mind I looked around my room only...my room wasn't here….it was just a wasteland...I could make out pieces of smashed buildings buried in grey sand reminding me of an apocalyptic movie…
My heart pumped a bit faster as I looked around for some semblance of life but it was all sand and destruction, I looked at the sky and just found blackish grey clouds….not a single bird in the air.
"H-hello??" I called out in the voice that wasn't mine, I got no response so I started walking searching the buildings that I could enter and that looked to have things in them, there wasn't much to find in any of them, some tables, chairs, and wrecked computers, but no life.
I was getting even more scared now as I hurried my search along, I kept calling out to the wasteland hoping for anyone to respond but no one did….not a single person…
I stood in the wasteland city the soft sand beneath my hooves, slight wind blowing across my fur, my ears laid back against my head as I stared down at my current finding…. something that twisted my insides, something that sent an ache in my heart, a fear throughout my body...a human skull sat half buried in the sand, slowly being uncovered by the wind.
I shook stepping back as my eyes were locked onto the skull, shakily I glanced around now focusing more on the ground, my pupils shrinking in terror as I found more and more and more skulls...the skeletal remains of this cities inhabitants laid all around the desert floor, the winds slowly uncovering some while burying others...
I shook my head in denial and looked around further, I found even more death littered across the ground, I couldn't understand this, why? Why so much death?? What happened?? Why was I alive when so many were dead?!
My questions went unanswered till a single memory entered my mind, a single memory which answered my questions...Alicorns are immortal...tears formed in my eyes before streaming down my face...I was immortal...I outlived humanity...I outlived everything!! "No...no! I don't want to be immortal!! I don't want to live forever!! Please! Please don't do this to me!!" I fell to my stomach sobbing at my fate, to live forever in a dead world…
My eyes suddenly opened as I felt the warm tears running down my face, my room in Twilight's castle surrounding me, I was back...sitting up I looked at the tear stained pillow, before looking away, just staring at the wall across from the bed...sleep used to mean rest for the mind and body….a place where anything happened, where you could experience amazing dreams…It was my hell now...each night one nightmare after the other...and then I'd wake to a new hell…
The door slowly opened after a soft knock, Twilight peaked in smiling before her smile faded seeing Nightmare's state "Nightmare? Are you alright?" It was so strange to ask a previous villain who nearly took over Equestria if she was alright, although after yesterday she owed it to the mare...
My ear twitched at the sound of that name...Nightmare...was my life a fucking joke? My eyes looked towards Twilight, she was going to come in to deliver some new kind of shit for me to deal with today...it was the only reason she even talked to me...we may have made up a bit yesterday but it didn't excuse her previous actions before that….not once had I even been asked to join dinner...hell I hadn't even eaten since Monday...what did it matter anyway I didn't get hungry…
Twilight's body went rigid, the eyes staring at her sent flashbacks of when she had first faced Nightmare Moon and then back in the library the day before...they were cold and so full of hate, the Nightmare she'd allowed into her home didn't have those eyes...those eyes were innocent, scared, and gentle…
She backed up slightly and swallowed, a spell was prepared in her mind in case Nightmare tried anything "a-are you ok?"
I sat there silent for a few seconds "I had a bad night…" slowly I got out of bed and walked towards the door.
Twilight scrambled backwards out of the way as the large mare walked out of the room, she was relieved that those eyes were no longer focused on her, but now without them she could see the bad state Nightmare was in, her mane was disheveled and her eyes did also look like they had bags under them…
"I'm sorry to hear that Ni-" Twilight shut up as she noticed Nightmare stop walking and tense up "B-Blake…" she calmed down and continued walking, so her name set her off...guess she was going to have to refer to her as Blake...she'd have to tell the girls to do the same..
So she was calling me by my name now?...guess smarty pants is smart after all...shouldn't take a genius though to get how much I fucking hate that name…I growled as I walked.
Twilight flinched as a vase suddenly shattered when Nightmare walked by it, she felt a sudden wave of alicorn magic, it didn't seem normal though, more out of control similar to when she was trying to get her to perform a spell...she might not have intentionally even shattered the vase…that was going to require further studying…no! No more studying... that's probably what got her in this state...
I sat in the library waiting for Twilight, she cleaned it up pretty good..couldn't even tell I had a outburst yesterday, I figure I might as well get whatever she wanted done with...whatever bullshit it is will distract me from the bullshit of my life….
Twilight walked over "alright Blake...since you've had a bad night you don't need to do this today...I don't want to force you to do something when you're not feeling good.."
I blinked...she was giving me a chance to not do what she wants?....this was great! I could do whatever I wanted today!..
..Like what?...I can't leave the castle without an umbrella or something to keep me out of the sun...and even with something like that, everyone in town was terrified of me
Twilight watched Nightmare Moon's expression go from tiredness, to an excited smile, then to a saddened look.
"I'll just do what you want…" I huffed.
Twilight frowned slightly "alright…" she stood and walked out of the room, returning a few seconds later with Rarity.
"Good morning darling, I have so much planned for us to-" Rarity stopped talking as her eyes went wide and she gasped very dramatically "your mane and tail!!"
I looked at the glowing magical mane and tail, it didn't look smooth like I had seen before, now it had a few hairs poking up along it's edge...huh I kinda figured this hair would always remain cloud shaped only changing when wet.…I looked back at Rarity "it's a bit messy so?"
"So? So?? Or dear you are coming with me this instant and we're fixing that dreadfully messy mane and tail!" Rarity turned and began walking out of the door.
"Um Rarity I still need to give her that gift" Twilight couldn't help but smile softly at Rarity's behavior, it was something similar they shared, Twilight admitted she was a bit of a control freak.
"Gift?" I looked at Twilight.
Twilight looked to her and levitated up a thin black metal band and levitated it over to Blake.
It looked like a ring….wait….ring..Twilight handing it to me...this wasn't a proposal was it??? I blushed "uh um T-Twilight w-we don't even know each other."
Twilight quirked a brow looking confused before she looked at the ring and her eyes widened blushing "no no! That's not what this is!! Th-this is a magical ring that allows you to walk in the sun!!"
"Oh…."
The two looked at each other blushing before Twilight put the ring on Blake's horn and pushed her and Rarity out of the room "ok goodbye, have fun!" The doors slammed shut.
I sat blushing before looking up at my horn, I couldn't see the ring but I could feel it there, it felt kinda weird but also like wearing a ring on my finger, so it just needed getting used to.
"Well now that you got Twilight's gift we can go" Rarity was smirking at Blake.
I blushed "yeah...yup" I nodded and stood "let's go.."
Rarity lead her towards the castle doors and walked out, she stopped though when Blake stood at just the edge of the sunlight that peaked through the doorway.
I looked down at the light that I had come to fear…Twilight's gift better work or I'm gonna…..be mad at her...I couldn't hurt her or any of the ponies...my accursed love of these characters was too strong…and my non-violent soul...the memories of the day before...how close I came to hurting someone...so unlike me.
Taking a deep breath I closed my eyes and took a step forward, the warmth of the sun hitting my skin making me flinch...but I didn't feel any burning...no pain...opening my eyes I looked at myself, no smoke either! This ring worked! I smiled and began running around and jumping in excitement "woo! Yes!! Haha!!"
Rarity watched with a smile, Blake was much like a child reminding her of her little sister and her friends.
I kept running around before I fell and rolled down a small hill and landed in front of Rarity on my back, I blinked and looked up at her before smiling a bit embarrassed.
She chuckled "are you alright darling?"
I nodded and stood up shaking some dirt off.
Rarity had to look up in order to look at Blake...she was quite big…her eye slightly twitched noticing the dirt now coating the large mare, and quite dirty….
"Well darling we should head to my boutique before you make yourself even more of a mess" Rarity began walking.
I huffed quietly and followed, just when I was having fun I get a comment about my appearance...plus horses are usually dirty….though Rarity would be a show pony so her cleanliness makes sense...if Applejack were here though she wouldn't care…
Walking towards the town my head hung slightly at my now downcast mood, a day with the fancy pony of PonyVille, this was going to be quite the day…
My eyes while looking around the scenery happened upon the small white mare in front of me, I'm not used to being...well a giant amongst others….she was so small, I feel like if I tripped and fell on her I'd crush her…..god I couldn't even think of what I'd do….hey Twilight, so I accidentally crushed Rarity on the way to her boutique sorry…
Shaking my head I got out of my thoughts and looked down at Rarity, specifically her cutie marks...so strange how in this world you could actually see the fur...and the cutiemark was part of that, so their fur was different colored….if they were shaved would it still be there?....
Speaking of the fur I could definitely tell Rarity kept herself in tip top shape, fur perfectly combed and almost sparkling in the sunlight like snow, she was a very pretty mare especially in this version of the world...and those hips were very distracting….
I suddenly smacked myself with my wing, what the heck was I doing?!? I don't stare at girls butts!!! Jesus! I'm really out of it today….
Blushing hard I looked at the town we were now entering, the ponies all around were looking at me in fear, momentary confusion took me before remembering to them I was the monster that tried taking over Equestria…
With ears folded back I looked away from the ponies and kept my eyes on the ground, my hooves moving beneath me, it still felt so strange….no hands or feet, just these hard round things at the ends of my limbs, it still so hard to believe this is what I am now....a pony...a mare! It's...crazy...
"Here we are Darling" Rarity suddenly chimed as she opened the door for me to her boutique.
Looking up it was way bigger in person...walking through the door I looked around, so strange to see a cartoon building in real life, cool yet also sorta disorienting.
Rarity walked in closing the door and walked towards the dressing room "follow me dear and we'll get you in proper shape" she trotted to the room.
Following I peaked into the room seeing the pony mannequins, some sporting dresses, rolls of fabric were on one side of the room, some tables with fabric stretched out across it, some had needles in them, all preparations for dresses.
Walking in I looked at Rarity as she stood beside a chair sitting in front of a mirror with a counter, it looked like a barbers but...more fancy...and girly…
Moving over to her I sat in the chair, different than how I would have as a human...it looked more similar to that of a dog sitting, Rarity got in front of me and began getting to work, levitating different items in the air and to me.
From straightening irons, to scissors and combs, she started with my mane brushing it before using the straightening iron to press the hair, cutting the few to long strands with the scissors.
Rarity pursed her lips before speaking "Darling….have...you been using the proper conditioner for your mane?...you have so many split ends...and it's not as vibrant as it could be…"
"Uh...I'm..not really used to using these hooves so, no…"
"Well that won't do" she turned the chair and Nightmare along with it so her back was facing the counter before she hit a lever and the chair leaned back placing Nightmares head in the sink.
"Uh Rarity?" I looked at her confused before water began running onto my hair...guess I was getting the full salon special…
Rarity put some soap into the water allowing it to bubble before she turned the water off and ripped her hooves in and began rubbing Nightmares mane, she couldn't believe a mare wouldn't take care of herself this much, it was as if she had no desire to make herself presentable.
I sat in the chair...uncomfortable, it wasn't the chair itself more so the surroundings...I didn't have a phone to watch a video on while this happened, so I was left looking around with my limited view point, looking at Rarity felt awkward.
After half an hour Rarity hit the lever letting the chair sit straight up, she then returned to cleaning and fussing with the mane, brushing it and fluffing it with her magic before she moved back in front of Nightmare.
"Alright time for the finishing touches" she smiled and levitated make up over.
My eyes widened "woah woah, uh Rarity...I...appreciate all the help but...I'm not into makeup...at all.."
"Oh don't be silly darling, all mares love a little makeup, and how else would I teach you generosity than to gift you the experience of looking your best?" She smiled and began applying the makeup not bothering to wait for Nightmares reply.
Cringing and squirming a bit I sat as Rarity began to bring multiple different makeup items to my face, I hated this...I hated this a lot...I felt so uncomfortable and embarrassed...I'm a guy and no part of me was into putting makeup on…
Rarity finished with applying some lipstick before stepping back "you look fabulous darling! Now to complete this look we should get to work on getting you a dress, I should have one that fits your mane and fur but it'll need some adjustments, your quite bigger than the mares I usually make dresses for" she chuckled softly trotting to her rack of dresses and looking through them.
I turned in the chair and looked at myself in the mirror, the sight...had two reactions….one hoof the mare in the mirror was stunning, her dark fur and blue eye shadow and lipstick caused her to look alluring and beautiful...on the other hand I was that mare...I felt..so wrong...I shouldn't look stunning...alluring...or beautiful! I was a guy...and one that didn't want this!
Swallowing my suddenly dry throat I had to look away from the mirror, my breathing felt heavier...and my legs were trembling, closing my eyes I breathed in deeply, I had to calm down, it was fine...I was fine..nothing to worry about…
"Darling you'll need to stand on the platform for the adjustments, the lighting is far better there than on that side of the room" Rarity called not turning away from her dress search.
Standing I walked over and stood on the platform, at least I didn't have to look at a mirror….correct that...there's a full body mirror over here...goody I get to see my entire alien body now…
Turning my head away I looked out the window at the outside world, somewhere away from my problems...somewhere I don't have to deal with this..
"Ah hah! Found it!" Rarity walked over with the dress levitating behind her.
I looked and felt ice go down my spine, the dress was dark blue and black….and a dress...a very feminine dress "Rarity….do...I have to wear that?"
Rarity frowned looking at the dress "why? Do you not like it?"
"No no..it's not that it's just...I...I um…" I didn't know how to put it into words, I tried to avoid with the makeup but she ignored that, I didn't want to hurt her feelings either.
Sighing with my ears pinned back I looked away from the dress and Rarity "nevermind…."
Rarity looked at her about to say something before shaking her head and began working on the dress, cutting some points to get it on Nightmare before restitching them so it fit better on her "hm bigger than Luna, similar to Princess Celestia's size, wings are a bit smaller, and flanks are a tad wider."
Each comment about this body made that knot in my stomach tighten, my ears were pinned back so hard it felt like they were ready to push right into my head, this wasn't my body...I wasn't a mare...just had to breathe, in and out...slow and steady...
After a bit more stitches there, and an addition of fabric here the dress adjustments were finished, stepping back Rarity looked at her hoofy work "Fabulous darling! Simply fabulous."
Turning I looked at my reflection in the full body mirror, the large blue mare stood with a flowing mane and tail in a dark blue and black dress, the fabric had a glittering to it giving it a sparkle, it perfectly complimented the mane and fur, it was beautiful…
But I hated it….I hated seeing it on me..I hated seeing myself in this mirror...I hated being this! I wasn't a mare! I wasn't beautiful! I'm not supposed to be!! I'm supposed to be normal! A normal guy! Not this! Not a girl!!
My breathing was heavy and quick, my heart beating a mile a minute I could hear it in my ears, my ears which were different...longer than they should be, not human...these lungs I was breathing with weren't my own, larger than a humans, my body was heavier than a humans, longer, larger, not normal, not human!
Backing up with shaking hooves my eyes were wide and focused on the floor, my vision flickering in and out of focus and starting to tunnel, a ringing filling my ears deafening all other sounds. The walls closing in the room around me, mind racing with thoughts, thoughts of panic, rage, sadness, disgust, fear….my horn began glowing..
Rarity was smiling looking over her model before she noticed Nightmares sudden change in attitude, her head was hung down and there was a look of distress in her face, her eyes were wide and she was breathing quite heavily, ears falling back Rarity began to get worried "d-dear?....are you alr-"
The mirror suddenly exploded sending the glass flying across the room, then the next mirror, and the next, and the next, the dress encasing Blake was ripped off in a glowing blue glow before it burned up in the air, the other dresses in the room soon igniting before immediately turning to ash.
Rarity stood in shocked silence looking to the destruction of her room.
I stood shaking and breathing heavily, the ringing slowly stopping and my vision clearing I blinked and looked around gasping as I saw the shattered mirrors and burning dresses, lifting a hoof I looked to Rarity who looked horrified "I-I'm sorry Rarity...I'll clean this up I j-"
"Get out…."
"W-what?" My ears pinned back further.
"Get out!!" Rarity yelled glaring at her.
Stumbling back I quickly rushed out of the room and then out of the boutique, I didn't even realize what I was doing...even now it's a blur, I didn't remember breaking the mirrors or burning the dresses...I didn't even know I could do that….I...I just...didn't like seeing myself like that..as not me…
Soon arriving at the castle I rushed in closing the door behind me and stood there for a couple seconds, that knot though not as tight was still there...just seeing my legs reminded me of how I wasn't me....the knot tightened ever so slightly...it made me feel sick...closing my eyes tightly and breathing in and out shakily I tried to not think about it, not think about not being me.
"Blake? Your back so soon? It's only been a couple hours...I was expecting you to be with Rarity for most of the d-Blake?...is everything okay?" Twilight walked towards the large mare after hearing her return, but getting closer she noticed her shaking form and stressed expression.
"I...I just...I don't…" my voice quivered and I doubt I could form the right words...couldn't say what I wanted because I didn't know...I didn't know anything! I didn't know why I destroyed the library, why I destroyed the boutique, why I was such a freak!! Tears forming in my eyes I broke down sobbing, I don't even understand why I was crying...something in me just broke…
Twilight's ears went back and she frowned hurrying over to the mare to hug her as she began crying into her shoulder, Twilight didn't understand what happened at all...Blake had just went through so many different emotions today, from anger, to excitement, to relaxed, to now crying…
Though not understanding she wrapped her wings around Blake trying to comfort her, she still wondered if this mare truly wasn't Nightmare but she couldn't let a pony suffer "come on...let's get you to your room so you can rest...okay?"
Sniffling Blake nodded not confident enough to try speaking.
Walking her down the hall Twilight kept glancing to the large sad mare, such a different personality from the Nightmare Moon she had fought all those years ago...and if it is the same Nightmare than she's either changed...or the greatest actor Equestria's ever seen.
Spike walked out of the library and saw them "is everything alright?" He didn't feel the safest around the evil Alicorn of darkness but even he could tell she wasn't very evil currently.
"Yes Spike...could you make us some tea and bring it to Blake's room…?" Twilight asked her dear little assistant dragon.
He nodded and hurried to the kitchen.
Twilight walked Blake into her room and laid her in the bed which she fixed while Blake was gone, pulling the blanket up and over Blake and sat beside the bed looking to the sniffling mare as she hugged a pillow...she looked like a child honestly..a scared child...
With the blanket over me I didn't have to see this body...closing my eyes I pressed my head further into the pillow I clutched.
Twilight hesitantly reached her wing over before gently petting Blake's head, she didn't know what else to do to comfort a sad pony currently, all she could think of is when she was sad or sick as a filly her mother would tuck her into bed and pet her head gently, though simple it helped calm her when she was younger.
Sniffling I was surprised by the caressing of Twilight's wing before I relaxed slowly, the gentle movement eased my tension and stress away, the thoughts that clouded and stormed my mind faded to the back of my mind.
Twilight smiled seeing the tension leave Blake's body, as she pet her head she began to hum softly, a song her mother had hummed to her as a child.
Memories of my mother came to my mind, days when I was sick or dealing with a migraine….her humming and gentle caressing of my hair….it melted away the aches and pain….my eyes felt heavier before I closed them allowing myself to just listen and feel.
Spike walked through the door but stopped seeing the two, Twilight's smile and gentle petting giving him fond memories of the past, quietly stepping back out of the room he walked back down the hall, they needed time alone and he didn't want to ruin it for them.
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Aww, I was hoping Rarity would have made a cloak to protect Blake from the sun. Sorta like this. Oh well. That leaves Kindness and Honesty.
the elements wanting to help but not beleving our mc's story is eventualy going to blow up in their face
10529105
It's already blown up in Rarity's face.
Nice chapter. I hope to see more soon. This story is good.
Blake's on his way to a complete mental breakdown. Honestly I wouldn't be surprised if Twilight walked in to his room one morning to find him completely catatonic.
Only one I see believing her is Applejack
It's Rarity's own fault that she couldn't take a hint. Just saying. Also, 'all mares love a bit of makeup'? Lady, have you forgotten that you live in a farming village, one with at least two large-scale farms and at least 3 gardens that support the livelihood of their caretakers? Have you forgotten your dear friend Applejack? What about your dear friend Princess Twilight Sparkle? She only wears makeup for formal events and matters of office that involve being with other ponies.
10529366
Next chapter next Thursday
10530560
In her defense she also assumes this is Nightmare Moon who is a corrupted version of Luna, so to her it's assumed she'd like make up being a princess and all.
How wrong she was...
10530978
I don't mind the wait. It's worth it.
10530995
Yeah I'm trying to keep the chapters spread out so I can work on the next.....I'm not the best at keep up with stories....I loose inspiration and ideas alot..
10529071
Maybe for nightmare night...
Interesting and engaging as always.
10532010
Thanks
Ponyville
Luna Princess Celestia's
Spike
10536589
Thanka
Another botch on the lessons it seems. Hopefully Applejqck and Fluttershy will be better, because so far these lessons seem more about making Blake do things other people enjoy.
So far only Rainbow, surprisingly, Fluttershy, and Twilight have been kind to Blake. Bit disappointed in Rarity.
10622303
What...
Well, that was a let down
Rarity pulled a Fluttershy role model event again, this time ignoring deliberately all body languages.
Delusional. There is already plenty on longevity research that shows that biological immortality is definitely possible. At most his parents would die which would have happened with or without immortality.