Pearls Before Swine: Part 2
Spike was tired. Strike that, Spike was dead tired. Dead on his claws, drained of life and energy with nary a drive to get up. After days and days of etiquette training, fittings and Rarity’s ever growing temper, Spike was finding it harder and harder to get out of bed each morning. But today was the day of the party, the very reason Rarity put Spike through the wringer. Rarity… she made Spike’s heart flutter and knees weak, but lately Spike’s heart felt no fluttering and his knees stayed straight. They had to stay straight or Rarity would yell at him on proper posture again and Spike didn’t want that.
Today will be better. Today we’ll have fun.
Spike finally and laboriously crawled out of bed, feeling a huge weight on his back as he strolled into the bathroom and brushed his teeth. Afterwards he’d have to pack his suitcase and meet with Rarity at the station to catch the train to Canterlot. Spike finished brushing his teeth and decided to start packing. He didn’t need to bring much; the most important part was the suit that Rarity made. Spike reached out for the outfit but then retracted his claw. He didn’t make any motion to actually remove it from his closet; he just stared at it with a grimace. It was a beautifully tailored suit, silky smooth to the touch. It was a traditional black, double-breasted suit, but the collar and lapels were a lighter shade of black to give the jacket some dimension to it. The brass buttons were polished so perfectly that they shined like gold. Pleats in the back hid the buttons that opened up the holes where Spike would sport his wings.
It truly was a work of art and anypony would be amazed that Rarity was able to construct a suit that not only looked so stunning but was also made for a dragon of Spike’s size. Yet as Spike’s glazed vision took in all of Rarity’s hard work he felt no amazement or awe. He normally praised all of Rarity’s accomplishments, assuring her that her creation was even better than the last and how floored everypony will be when they see the latest design by the “fashionista supreme Rarity.” But this suit felt hollow to him. In the simplest terms, Spike did not like this suit.
There was a knock at his door. “Spike?” Twilight called from the other side. “May I come in?”
Spike grabbed his suit and placed it in his suitcase. “Sure thing Twi.”
Twilight stepped into Spike’s room, wearing a mischievous grin. “So are you ready for your big date with Rarity?”
“I-it’s not a date Twilight. I’m just… her plus one.”
“Oh come on, you and her in fancy clothes in Canterlot? I may be new to the whole dating thing, but even I can see the sparks flying.”
If you mean the sparks from her gnashing teeth then yeah, Spike groaned internally.
Twilight tilted her head. “Spike? Are you ok I thought you’d be happier, you sure were when you first told me about Rarity inviting you.”
Spike forced a small smile. Why make Twilight worry over his reluctance to be with Rarity? “O-oh I am, I guess I’m just nervous is all,” he added a hearty chuckle to drive the nail further.
“Pssh, you got nothing to worry about Spike, you’ll be great. You’ll be a true gentlecolt- er, gentledrake who’ll wow Rarity and sweep her off her hooves. And do you know why?”
“Why?”
Twilight wrapped her hooves around him in a hug. “Because I raised you to be a kindhearted and respectful dragon. I know you’ll do great. And who knows, you just might make a connection.” Twilight gave Spike a wink.
“Heh thanks Twilight. I’ll give it a shot.” If she’ll let me that is…
Spike’s eyes threatened to jump out of his head when he noticed the time. If the clocks were accurate (and Twilight made darn sure each clock in the castle was 100% accurate) he only had ten minutes to get to the station for the next train to Canterlot.
“Oh no! I’m late, I’m late, I’m late!” Spike grabbed his suitcase, gave Twilight a quick nuzzle and bolted out of his room. Twilight marveled at how somepony as big as Spike could move so fast.
“Good luck!” she called out.
Rarity tapped her hoof impatiently as she glanced at her pocket watch for the umpteenth time. Where in the world is that dragon? The train will be here any moment. A column of smoke rose up in the distance as said train began to rapidly close the distance to the station. Rarity felt a gust of wind blow from behind her and heard a thump like somepony making a landing.
“I’m so sorry for being late!” Spike said hastily. “I-I was just so tired and I overslept. I got here as soon as I could!’ Spike braced for another chewing out by the alabaster mare. After all it wouldn’t be the first time that week.
Rarity sighed in relief. “That’s quite alright darling. I suppose I did overwhelm you over the past few days. But the important thing is that you made it in time. So let’s be on our way, shall we?”
Spike wasn’t expecting this. He was expecting Rarity to tear into him like wrapping paper on Hearth’s Warming. She was so quick to do so when he made even the slightest mistake during her etiquette training. Maybe since he made progress and the party was that night, Rarity was feeling much more relaxed. The train pulled up to the platform and the passengers filed out in an orderly manner.
So I guess it really was just stress. Spike smiled his first genuine smile in a week. “Sure thing! After you, milady.”
The train chugged steadily down the tracks towards the capitol city, cars swaying gently and nudging ponies in their seat. Spike and Rarity were sitting opposite each other on the benches in the center of one of the many passenger cars. A mare came down the aisle with a pleasant smile and a cart full of snacks; Spike waved her down and bought a bag of cinnamon nuts and a packaged cucumber sandwich. He offered them to Rarity and she chose the sandwich over the nuts.
Rarity swallowed her dainty bit of her sandwich. “Just imagine it Spiky, in a few hours we’ll be attending the party of the year, no, of the century! Pish Posh’s grand soirée will be the talk of Canterlot and we’ll be there for all of it and I’ll have the chance of a lifetime to get into Pish Posh’s good graces. No pressure right?”
Spike smiled. “Aw don’t worry about a thing Rarity. You’ll be great, I’m sure you’ll be having Pish Posh eating out of your hoof in no time. I’m just worried I might not be… uh, up to their standards.”
Rarity waved her hoof. “Oh balderdash, you’ve been practicing for this party for days. As long as you adhere to what I’ve taught you about mingling and the proper customs you’ll do fine darling.”
Spike rubbed his neck sheepishly. “Gee, thanks Rarity, that means a lot.”
The rest of the ride was filled with pleasant small talk between the dragon and unicorn. All the while Spike felt an enormous pressure being alleviated from his body as visions of a white mare in pretty dresses calmed his nerves.
Spike wiped the steam from his bathroom mirror and grinned at the handsome dragon looking back at him winking and pointing finger guns. After checking into the hotel, Rarity decided to go to the salon for some last minute pampering and prepping, leaving Spike to his own devices, though Rarity did recommend washing up before leaving, Spike was grateful that the hotel Rarity booked had a shower big enough for a dragon; saves a lot of trouble. He opened his suitcase and hung his suit on an available rack. He scratched his head, something was missing but what could it be? He had his jacket, the matching vest, cuff links, bowtie- Wait… where’s the bowtie? Spike turned his suitcase upside down and shook out its contents. His sleeping cap, toothbrush, some gems and some cologne on loan from Discord, but no bowtie to be found.
“Oh geez! I can’t believe I forgot the bowtie! What am I gonna do?” Spike paced around the room. “Way to go genius, you’re in Canterlot and going to a party with Rarity and you forgot something so simple as an accessory.” Spike groaned and threw his claws in the air. He did not want to get an earful from Rarity again over this; she finally started being nice to him again. But then Spike just shrugged his shoulders.
“Eh, I’m sure Rarity will understand, besides I don’t want to keep her waiting.”
What’s taking him so long? It’s officially the time to be fashionably late. Rarity stood by the gate to the mansion with both invitations in her magical grasp. I’m sure Spike will be here any moment now. He knows how important this night is for me after all. More and more sharply dressed ponies crossed Rarity’s path and entered the stately manor grounds. She took another moment to just admire the exterior of this grand vista through the bars of the gate.
The ivory mansion was enormous and even that word alone wasn’t doing it justice. Rarity was convinced that this abode could easily fit every pony in Ponyville with some room to spare (of course she just might be exaggerating). The topiary lining the sides of the mansion and extended to the front gate were all perfectly trimmed in the shapes of ponies, rabbits, birds and other small animals. The stairs leading to the mansion wrapped around either side of a large and elegant fountain, decorated with gold and silver bands and illuminated by a set of waterproof lights to make the sophisticated figure shine all the brighter all night long.
Just then a gust of wind blew through Rarity’s mane and over her dress and she heard a familiar thump. Spike landed a few yards away from Rarity wearing a snappy jacket and a pleased smile.
“Hey Rarity! I didn’t keep you waiting long did I?”
Rarity giggled, “Well maybe a little, but I think I’ll let you off the hook this one time.”
Spike took in Rarity’s appearance and his heart skipped about two or three beats. The back of her mane was styled in a low bun with her signature curls perfectly conditioned and perfectly framed her face. Her hooves were polished to perfection with a silver bangle on her left foreleg. Her lips had a coat of ruby red lipstick and her dress, oh sweet Celestia that dress. It was royal blue with black lace forming diamond patterns on the sleeves, shoulders, neck and chest and from her flank down to her fetlocks was a layer of lace with the beautiful blue fabric lying underneath. It hugged her torso in a way that was alluring, but not promiscuous. It was truly one of her best dresses.
“You look… amazing Rarity…” Spike said in awe.
“Why thank you Spiky, I knew I could count on you for a few kind words. And you look positively hand-… Spike,” Rarity’s voice suddenly had an edge that could cut stone. “Where is your bowtie?”
Spike gave a nervous chuckle, “W-well, I uh, seemed to have, uh, forgot it. In Ponyville.”
“You WHAT!?” Rarity screeched and Spike recoiled from the outburst. “Spike that bowtie is the centerpiece of your whole ensemble! It’s what pulls your look together and you forgot it!? How could you do something so foolish!?”
“I-I’m sorry Rarity!” he said as the stressors from the previous few days rose up and picked at the back of his mind and he began to fidget with his claws. “I didn’t mean to do it, I was just in a rush and I thought I had it with my jacket but-“
“How am I supposed to show my face at this party with you looking incomplete?” Rarity rubbed her temples as she tried her best to fight off a raging migraine. “Think Rarity, think! How can I salvage this?”
Spike’s ear fins drooped. “I, um… could just go home if you want me to…”
“That’s also out of the question! If I don’t show up with a plus one I’ll-“ Rarity suddenly caught a glimpse of a shop. It was a shop specializing in male attire and accessories with a window display showing the buying public an assortment of suits, hats and… bowties! Rarity made a mad dash to the shop just as the employee was about to flip the ‘open’ sign to ‘closed.’ Rarity burst in crying out about a wardrobe emergency. After a few minutes Rarity emerged from the shop with a bowtie in hoof.
“Crisis averted Spike. Thanks to a stroke of serendipity, I’ve acquired another bowtie for you.”
Spike eyed the accessory curiously, despite not having anywhere near the amount of experience in the fashion industry as Rarity had, he couldn’t help but ask, “Doesn’t it look a bit too small?”
“It was the largest size they had, I’m sure it’ll be alright.” Rarity’s magic snaked the fabric around Spike’s neck and between the folds of his collar. Then in a quick fluid motion tied the two ends together into a neat bow.
“ACK! Um… Rarity, it’s uh, kinda tight…” Spike’s voice sounded like it was being strained through a bottleneck.
“Well I can’t make it any looser, it might come undone. Now come along, we’re late enough as it is.” And without another word Rarity trotted off towards Pish Posh’s mansion with Spike in tow.
As soon as Rarity stepped hoof into the mansion she was overcome with a wave of unbridled glee. The foyer was carpeted in the richest shade of red she’s ever seen and every step she took felt like she was walking on clouds. Well-dressed ponies chatted amongst themselves as waiters served Hors d'Oeuvres on silver trays with practiced ease, professionalism and grace. The light playing off the marble staircases leading to the upper floors of the mansion and the gold statues glowing with an ethereal aura giving the room an almost dreamlike quality, with nary an imperfection in sight.
Rarity was at a loss for words. That is until she caught Spike tugging on his bowtie. “Stop it!” she hissed.
“But… it’s really tight…” Spike croaked.
“If you keep pulling on it you’ll untie it, so leave it be!”
Spike just nodded his head dejectedly.
Rarity caught the attention of one of the passing waiters. “Pardon me sir, but where might I find Pish Posh?”
“Madame Posh? She’s in the ballroom.” The waiter pointed his hoof to a large pair of wooden doors.
“Thank you very much. Come along Spike.” Rarity trotted towards the ballroom. She really wanted to gallop, skip and prance. To cheer, laugh out loud and holler to the world of her joy and excitement and she would have if she were anywhere else. She had an image to maintain of course.
Rarity took her first uneasy, nerve-raked steps into the ballroom and was taken aback by the sights that greeted her. The off white and brown colored floor tiles were perfectly glazed and polished. Tall, wide windows decorated the far wall giving the guests an up close look at the topiary garden through the crystal clear glass. But what stole Rarity’s attention above all else was the most marvelous chandelier she’d ever laid eyes upon. The massive frame was gold, encrusted with vibrant and shimmering streaks of blue metal running down and out forming the array of arms like a waterfall branching off into perfectly molded streams. The light radiating from the from the glass lanterns was bright, but not blinding, like the light of the full moon on a cloudless night, illuminating perfectly to see everything and everypony in the room.
“It’s beautiful!” Rarity gasped. “Isn’t it exquisite Spiky?”
“Uh huh…” Spike said in a tone a colt would have if he were being dragged through a museum exhibit on ships in bottles.
Rarity gave him a glare. “You better drop that attitude of yours mister dragon,” she said tersely. “Ponies will think you're a downer and Pish Posh will-“ Rarity inhaled sharply.
Standing some distance away under the grand chandelier was a unicorn mare with a blond mane tied back in a ponytail. She was wearing a black dress with a yellow shawl with a large broach of the same comb with a bee that sealed Rarity’s golden invitation.
“That’s- that’s her!” Rarity took a deep breath to help keep her from hyperventilating. “That’s Pish Posh! She’s right there!” Rarity coughed awkwardly to snap her back into her prim and proper role.
“Now remember Spike, bow, thank her for inviting you, ask simple questions and give short replies and be on your best behavior.”
“I will… I promise,” Spike wheezed.
Rarity trotted towards the illustrious hostess. Crossing under the glorious chandelier Rarity felt her heart pounding in her chest but her mask of poise and calm never faltered. At that moment all of Rarity’s training and practice for blending into high society was being put to the test. The way she carried herself, the way she gently tossed the curls of her mane and even the control of her breath. She made sure not to move too fast or too slow in approaching Pish Posh. Too fast and she’ll come off as impatient, too slow and she’ll seem embarrassed. But Rarity stayed cool and collected and soon she was a mere forelegs length away from the mare of the hour.
“Good evening Pish Posh,” Rarity said as she gave a slight bow. “It’s truly an honor to finally meet you, I’m-“
“Ah Rarity!” Pish Posh said in a pleased tone. “I was hoping you’d be here, I’ve been waiting for you all night.”
“Y-you have?”
“But of course, it’s not everyday a designer genuinely impresses me. And you my dear are a rare talent, somepony who truly embodies the word ‘rarity.’ I’ve wanted to get to know you for some time.” Pish Posh turned her head towards a unicorn mare with a short orange mane and glasses. “This is Rarity, she’s the one who made that absolutely stunning dress for Fleur De Lis.”
“Oh yes, of course!” said the unicorn mare. “Such a fine display of talent if I do say so myself.”
Rarity couldn’t believe her ears it took her a second or two to find her voice. “Well I’m flattered that you feel that way. I’m surprised somepony as great and as influential as you would think so highly of me.”
“How could I not? When I saw Fleur’s dress I just had to know more about the mare behind the design and I,”- Pish Posh’s brow furrowed. –“And who is this?”
Rarity noticed Spike at her side. “Oh, yes! Um, this is Spike, my plus one. Spike this is Pish Posh.”
After a few moments of silence Rarity jabbed Spike’s arm with her elbow. “O-oh right.” Spike took a deep breath and said in a strained voice, “Good evening Ms. Pish Posh, it’s a pleasure to meet you… thank you for your hospitality.”
Pish Posh’s eyes looked over Spike like she was taking him apart scale by scale with her gaze alone and then responded in a hoity air, “Yes… it’s –cough- to have you here…”
“Likewise,” said the mare at Pish Posh’s side with muted enthusiasm.
Rarity started to feel the first beads of panicked sweat build on her forehead as Pish Posh dissected the dragon and looking none too pleased. “Say Spiky, why don’t you go say hello to some of the guests while I have a chat with Ms. Posh.”
Spike anxiously rubbed his arm. “But… I don’t know anypony here… and I thought I was spending time with you…”
“Well then go and make some new friends, one can’t have too many of those, now off you go.” Rarity waved her hoof to shoo him away like a stray dog.
“Um, ok… Guess I’ll go then…”
“Yes,” Pish Posh responded sharply. “Go and make some new friends. I’m sure there’ll be plenty of ponies that’d love to make your acquaintance.” She said with an underlying edge of disbelief.
The Yes Mare with the orange mane stifled a laugh.
Spike slowly made his way into the sea of upper class ponies.
“I do hope your dragon, uh, friend, trimmed his claws,” Pish Posh said in mild annoyance. “I just had these floors polished and I don’t want him scratching the surface or Celestia forbid tear up the tiles.”
“Oh no need to concern yourself about that darling,” Rarity reassured. “I made sure his claws were clipped and filed, just incase such a situation arose.”
“Good, it’s nice to know that you’ve managed to add some civility to that dragon’s life.”
“Oh you’re so right Posh,” said the Yes Pony. “He should count himself lucky that he was groomed at all.”
Rarity chewed her lip. “Y-yes, very lucky indeed.”
Spike ambled away from Rarity and Pish Posh, his neck making quick, short motions looking around the room, the anxiety building up in his chest making it even more difficult to breath. Who could he possibly talk to? He doesn’t have a single thing in common with anypony here and they all had this uniform "mightier than thou" air about them as they sampled the food on silver platters, holding snooty conversations with other ponies with their noses in the air, as if they’re trying to see who could look the farthest down on the other without looking at the ceiling. Then there were the ponies that gave Spike glances that ranged from basic aversion to downright bafflement. Spike figured that they must have been thinking about how much of an oddity he was to be here.
Spike was starting to wonder why was he here? To spend time with Rarity, time she’d rather spend talking to a snooty, stuck up and rude pony, the biggest leaf in a pretentious forest. Why was Rarity so eager to push Spike away? She asked him to come with her and she didn’t even want to spend time with him? What was the point of all those fittings and those lessons to be accepted at this party if nopony wanted to be around him and the one pony he actually wanted to be with just told him to go away and spend time with other ponies. Who would want to spend time with him?”
“Oh my! Spike? Is that you old boy?”
Spike looked around to see where that aristocratic voice was coming from and was met by Fancy Pants and Fleur De Lis.
“Ah it is you! I thought I saw you and Rarity together earlier. I dare say I almost didn’t recognize you, seems you’ve gone through a bit of a change lately. Fleur, this is Princess Twilight Sparkle’s assistant, Spike. We met a few years ago.”
“A pleasure to meet you Spike,” Fleur said in a kind tone.
Spike smiled. “Hey Fancy Pants! It’s great to-! Oh wait…” Spike coughed. “Um, good evening Fancy Pants… and it’s a pleasure to meet you Fleur De Lis… congratulations on your engagement.”
Fleur and Fancy Pants gave each other perplexed looks. “Dear me, are you quite alright Spike? You sound like you’ve caught a dreadful case of laryngitis,” said Fancy Pants.
“Oh, no… I’m alright, really I am,” Spike gave a nervous laugh and hoped that would be enough to convince them both.
Fleur rubbed her chin with her hoof. “Hmm, I think I see the problem here.” Fleur’s horn glowed and untied Spike’s bowtie/choking hazard. Spike took a few deep breaths, thinking about how he’s taken breathing for granted all these years.
Fleur gave a small gasp, “My goodness Spike, how in the world were you able to tie this around your neck? It’s far too small for somepony like you.”
Fancy Pants nodded. “Indeed, you really aught to be careful my good chap. I’m sure you wouldn’t want Rarity to worry about you passing out on her.”
Spike chuckled and rubbed his sore neck. “Heh, heh, yeah I guess I should’ve bought a larger size. Silly me.” Wait, why did I cover for Rarity? Perhaps it was the lack of oxygen, but Spike’s mind was popping like corn kernels on a hot skillet as he tried to figure out why he didn’t tell Fancy Pants and Fleur the truth.
“Well no harm done. Now Spike perhaps you’ll indulge in this stallion’s curiosity and tell me what you’ve been up to since last we met? Especially where this growth spurt came from.”
Spike grinned. “Well, if you really want to know.”
“So that was the secret of your summer line. And here I thought you were inspired by Hoity Toity’s take on Saddle Arabian robes,” Rarity had been listening to Pish Posh’s tales of fashion triumphs with the same curiosity and laser focus that Twilight shows in her charts and check lists.
Pish Posh gave an amused chuckle, “Very keen eye Rarity, most ponies think I based it on robes of the Crystal Empire, but they’re way off.”
“They’re all so wrong,” said Pish Posh’s Yes Pony. “But can you blame them? They clearly aren’t as clever as Pish Posh. But kudos on being smarter than them Rarity.”
Rarity brushed a stray curl away from her face. “Well I like to think I have an exceptional attention to detail.”
“Speaking of detail,” Pish Posh said quickly, as if she were waiting all night for this opportunity. “Have you seen my new chandelier? I just purchased it for this soirée. Pure gold and blue tinted mithril with glass perfectly crafted by hoof. I’d tell you how much it cost, but it might make your pretty little head spin. It was so heavy I needed a team of earth ponies to lift it off the ground and a team of pegasi to anchor it. They said my ceiling couldn’t support this glorious piece, but you’d be surprised how quickly ‘no’ becomes ‘yes’ when you throw enough bits around.”
“I was admiring it the moment I stepped into the room. It’s magnificent.”
“I know it is, but thank you for your adoration.”
An earth pony waiter passed by and offered Pish Posh Hors d'Oeuvres. Her magic encased a small lemon tart before noticing something out of place.
“What the hay is this?” Pish Posh asked in disgust. “What are these little white specks? Get back to the kitchen and get another tray of tarts!”
The waiter bowed and scurried away.
Pish Posh rolled her eyes. “Earth ponies. Great for manual labor but they have no grace or tact when it comes to something as simple as serving guests. Honestly I wish I hired more unicorns.”
“They have grace and tact,” said the Yes Pony. “But I’m sure you already know that Rarity.”
“Oh. Uh, yes, yes of course I know that, everypony knows that,” Rarity felt like she had to wash her mouth out with soap. What would Applejack or Pinkie Pie think if they heard her say this? But Rarity needed to get into Pish Posh’s good graces so she’d have to play along and treat her earth pony friends to a day at the spa when she returned to Ponyville.
“But enough about my achievements. You simply must tell me more about that lovely little number you’re wearing, it’s absolutely darling. Sophisticated yet alluring. The lace is perfectly weaved in a way that brings out your curves in all the right places.” Pish Posh grabbed a glass of cider from a passing waiter with her magic and took a sip. Her eyes widened and she spat her drink out in revulsion.
“Oh dear, is everything alright? Did the cider spoil?”
Pish Posh’s face held her sour look and seemed to get worse as the seconds wore on. “Rarity you are aware that this is a formal affair, correct?”
“Of course I do!”
“Then would you kindly explain why your dragon is treating this party so casually like this is a barn yard or a quarry or wherever it is dragons like to lollygag?”
Rarity followed Pish Posh’s glare and was greeted to the sight of Spike speaking to a small group of ponies, with Fancy Pants and Fleur De Lis being the most noticeable. Spike was being very animated, motioning his arms and claws to emphasize key points in whatever yarn he was spinning for his audience. Rarity wasn’t exactly sure what Pish Posh was finding fault in. After all, his suit looked clean and pressed with his complementing bowtie… wait, where was his bowtie? Rarity felt a twinge of anger, he knew how important it was to keep his bowtie on and he still untied it, leaving it dangling limply around his collar.
“Please excuse me darling, I’ll go take care of this right away.” Rarity trotted off towards Spike, determined to give him a swift reprimand. How dare he embarrass her and in front of Pish Posh no less. It was time to give that dragon a piece of her mind.
“So there I was, sitting by the pond feeling sorry for myself when all of a sudden a wagon came out of thin air and was hurtling towards three fillies!” Spike’s claw reached up and moved in an arc towards the ground as Fancy Pants, Fleur De Lis and a few random ponies listened on bated breath for what was shaping up to be the climax of this thrilling tale.
“What happened next?” Fleur asked.
“Yes, are the fillies all right? Please tell me they’re all right!” said another pony biting his hooves.
“For a moment it seemed like time was at a crawl,” Spike continued. “But I had to act fast! So I leapt up and flew as fast as I could and was between the fillies and the wooden rocket at a speed that would’ve floored a Wonderbolt! And then…” Spike paused for dramatic effect, drinking in everypony’s anxious expressions from a tall glass.
“And then what?” Fancy Pants asked zealously.
Spike raised his arms over his head and pretended to brace himself against the wagon all over again. "I caught the wagon with my bare claws, which gave Princess Twilight enough time to teleport the fillies to safety!”
Spike’s audience clapped their hooves and stomped on the ground in applause of his heroic tale of might and bravery.
“Bravo!” said one pony.
“Marvelous!” said another.
“By Jove what a jolly good story,” Fancy Pants exclaimed.
Fleur nodded. “Indeed, you’re quite the valiant spectacle Spike. I can see why Fancy holds you in such high regards.”
Spike blushed and scratched his chin timidly. “Aw geez, it’s nothing really, just your everyday Ponyville weirdness. I just did what I thought was right.”
“Give yourself some more credit that that ol’ bean,” Fancy Pants said while firmly patting Spike’s arm. “You’re the reason those fillies are alive and well. Celestia only knows what would’ve happened if you weren’t there to save them and I dread to think about what could’ve happened. You, my good drake, are a hero.”
Pride began to swell up in Spike’s chest. That was the nicest thing he’d heard all night. “Wow… thank you Fancy Pants.”
“Fancy? Is that who I think it is?” Fleur asked looking across the room.
“Why yes, I do believe it is. Well Spike it’s been marvelous catching up, but I fear we must depart. Please let me know the next time you’re in Canterlot, I’d love to hear more about your adventures.”
“Ta-ta for now Spike, it was a pleasure meeting you,” Fleur gave a farewell wave as she, Fancy Pants and the rest of the ponies who listened to Spike’s story went about to converse with others.
“Bye Fancy Pants! Bye Fleur! Have a great night!” Spike waved enthusiastically with a smile. These few ponies actually wanted to listen to the stories of his triumphs and heroism. Spike was convinced that the ponies here wouldn’t give him the time of day, let alone have a full-blown conversation with him. He’ll have to figure out a way to thank Fancy Pants and Fleur for making his night a far more enjoyable experience then what he was having before. I wonder if they like throw pillows.
“SPIKE!”
Spike jumped and felt a shiver run down his spine to the very tip of his tail. Rarity stomped up to Spike with a glare so cold it threatened to freeze him where he stood and from what he could tell she was a few moments away from blowing her top like a firecracker in a teapot. Spike’s claws began to tremble, sweat built up on his face and his heart was racing. What was this feeling? He felt it before, many times before. He felt it when the diamond dogs took Rarity, he felt it when Queen Chrysalis tried to take over Canterlot, he felt it when Tirek left all of Spike’s friends powerless and helpless to his wrath and he felt it when he thought he and Rarity were going to be the timberwolves next meal. Fear. He was actually afraid of Rarity.
When did this happen? When did the mare that Spike fawned over for so many years cause his heart to beat in panic rather than to beat with the warmth and familiar tenderness he had come to associate with the snow-white mare? Where was the feeling of love that came from hearing her voice? Why was Spike seeing Rarity, the same mare he risked his life for on more than one occasion, with the same kind of dread he would feel when squaring up with a thousand year old villain?
“R-Rarity! What’s wrong?” Spike said timidly and laced with trepidation.
“What’s wrong!?” Rarity was practically breathing fire. “I’ll tell you what’s wrong! You’re not wearing your bowtie! It’s just hanging around your neck like some sort of slob!”
“Rarity I can explain-“
“I don’t want to hear it! This is a formal party and you’re not taking this seriously and you’re embarrassing me in front of Pish Posh, not to mention showing yourself to Fancy Pants and Fleur De Lis like this. Do you realize your little stunt might spawn rumors that will damage everything I’ve strived for?!”
“B-but Rarity you don’t understand! Fancy Pants and Fleur are the ones- GAAK!” Rarity’s magic grabbed the ends of the bowtie, constricting it even tighter around Spike’s neck. He didn’t even think it could be any tighter. Spike tried to voice his concerns, but he found that he couldn’t utter a single word aside from the gasps and wheezes in an attempt to breath.
“What I understand is that I expect you to keep that tied for the remainder of the evening, do you understand?”
Spike didn't croak a response, so he nodded instead.
“Good. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to try and smooth things over with Pish Posh, you stay out of trouble and don’t say anything unsavory.”
Spike couldn’t even point out the irony.
Rarity spun on her hooves and trotted her way across the polished floor and under the grand chandelier. She resumed her calm, controlled and poised demeanor as she approached the hostess.
“Dearest, do you have dandruff?” said a passing mare.
“What? I don’t have dandruff,” replied a stallion.
Rarity put on her best smile as she resumed conversation with Pish Posh, “I must apologize for Spike’s behavior, I promise it will not happen again.”
“I do hope so,” Pish Posh responded in annoyance. “I can’t have other ponies seeing such uncouth behavior. Honestly I can’t figure out why you invited him of all creatures. I thought it was apparent to everypony that dragons don’t exactly represent elegance and class.”
“Well I did spend the better part of my week trying to teach him the proper way to behave at a party on top of spending time making him his suit jacket so I couldn’t actually instruct him to the best of my abilities.”
“Oh honey,” the Yes Pony sighed. “I’m sure you did the best you could with a creature like him, no reason to put yourself down. After all there’s only so much one can do to educate a dragon, in my opinion.”
Rarity bit her lip. “Oh… well yes I suppose you’re right about that.”
“Of course she is,” Pish Posh replied haughtily. “After all you surely have hooves on experience in dealing with your dragon, uh, Barb?”
“Spike. And what do you mean by experience?”
Pish Posh covered her mouth with a hoof as she laughed. “Come now Rarity. I’m sure this isn’t the first instance of that silly dragon committing such a social faux pas. You must have seen plenty of his blunders.”
“Well… I suppose I have.”
Both Pish Posh and her Yes Pony leaned in closer. “Ooh, now I’m curious. Please Rarity, you simply must tell me more.”
Seriously, I hate the fact that it takes me a whole month to make an update, but sometimes I just keep writing and eventually 2,000 words turns into 6,000 or even 8,000 and it takes me forever to rewrite it. I'm still trying my best to get chapters out quicker I swear. But it's kinda hard since I have only one proof reader and I have to self edit, which I know is not recommended but I don't really have much of a choice. I could go to the editor groups and ask someone for their advice, but I'm paranoid and I'm not very trusting of others and the thought of someone stealing my idea haunts me to no end.
But I like to think I'm making progress, of course I'd love to hear feedback and see what you guys think.
As always, thanks for reading. See you next time 
Silver Wit
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Rarity is either gonna blow up at push posh and the yes pony or spike will overhear rarity talk down about him and they will have a major fight
9912494
Yeah couldn't agree more with you, I just hope that Rarity blows up cuz so far shes been a bitch. I love my sparity but I'm not liking her atm, poor spike. She needs to sort herself out, I hope spike doesn't overhear them, he's been through enough already. better yet, have celestial show up and put them in there place and go off at Rarity, to smack some sence into her.
Honestly I like where this seem to be going. I thinks Spike NEEDS a reality check with Rarity for their relationship to grow the same with Rarity. If he hear her using him as some kind of joke and show dog to all these up tight and racist ponies it will fuck things up for them. Something she can't fix with a eye flutter and a gem being thrown his way. And I think that is what they need. Something to rattle that foundation they fine themselves standing on and they can build something new. Get Spike to stop seeing Rarity as the perfecting shinning light and more of the mare she is faults and all. And get Rarity to see Spike isn't someone she can belittle or dismiss HE wont take it and he is a grown male and want respect that he has earned through his personality and actions. Overall I want to see the shake up and after so long of seeing Rarity treat Spike like this I want to see him go off on her not run away crying.
why do I see spike ripping off the bowtie and just walking out.
What nobody's mentioned is the fact that the chandelier (which is, as Pish Posh was told, too heavy for the structure of the building) is working it's way loose, scattering little bits of plaster dust, hence the white bits in the hor d’oeuves and the 'dandruff'. That things coming down, and I suspect Spike is going to have to save some ungrateful white pony from becoming a pancake.
Also, I agree with everything said above. Rarity is being a complete bitch.
Though I'm surprised at the way Pish Posh is acting, even if she is a rabid tribalist. The only dragon in Equestria is Spike, assistant and effectively little brother to Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship. He was raised by Princess Celestia, and is a Hero of the Crystal Empire, being on first name terms with Princess Cadence. So some petty social climbing bint like Pish Posh should be pushing Rarity aside to laud Spike, who has the kind of royal access any Canterlot noble would kill for, even if she privately despises him.
9923248
In my experience There's always one person who thinks they're higher than the rest, it may seem odd in this context with Princesses who basically have achieved Godhood, but someone who thinks they can buy their way out of any given problem is a troublesome soul. Not to mention I based her off of one of the ugliest souls in the history of TV.