Shane doesn't belong here; Heck he doesn't belong to where he came from really. Now stuck here how will he cope? how will he find a way to keep going?
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......so uh....so is our current human gonna tell them about the whole space probe.... or are we gonna ignore the whole elephant in the room?
8084639 things will be talked about, I am quite sure
8084639 I'd hope they'd be gradual what with how badly it affected him
8085195 you mean greatful right?
8085232 I've never heard of Greatful Dead or their music but no, I mean gradual, like over time & stuff not all at once.
I also don't mean grateful if that's what you were going for.
I guess if he does answer their questions so soon after his little episode they should be grateful but whatever.
I'm so fucking tired right now sorry if my wording is awkward or completely wrong.
ALL: there has been a slight edit to "The Vault" Chapter. Nothing you have to go back and read again. I had to edit the year he was born because I painted myself into a corner. I had forgot to account for his current age, a slip on my part.
I'm going to probably stop reading here as we're 16k words in and I don't even know what the main conflict of this story is. You've introduced 2 mysteries with regards to him being there and the 500 year old human satellite. Yet the rest has been a very passive character with everything else having no interesting twists on a HiE story.
The story has no conflict and no tension at this point and 16k is a lot of words for a novel (80-100k is average American novel length). The only conflicts that have existed were essentially immediately dealt with leaving me feeling like this story is meandering around without direction.
8252402
Its all good brother. We all have our likes and dislikes. I tend to write for the slow burn, rather than fast action. Great deal of world building and character backstory before we see any heavy conflict.
Thank you for giving it a look.
Time difference needs to be addressed at some point it seems.
Damn it, and after the praise I gave a few chapters ago you used Sentient in place of Sapient.
Dude I am apologizing for swearing but this story is fucking awesome! I'm only on chapter 6 and loving it. I can't wait to read your other works! Keep this one alive it's truly well written and flows beautifully. Caracters are well defined and I look forward to more. Good job!
Heh, I know the story behind that. It is pretty funny.
Personally, I'd have taken the opportunity for the best deadpan of all time.
.
.
.
"So that's where that went to. I hope it didn't hit anything important?"
love the Demolition Man reference
They really can't send him home, even if they knew how to find it. After 500 years, he'd be returning to a totally alien planet despite having grown up there.
The big mystery now is what decided to scoop him up and stuck him for nearly 500 years in stasis before dumping him on the planet? Why him? And are there any others out there ready to be dropped in everypony's back yard?