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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I hope everything goes well i really REALLY do
7075516
Thanks, I do have an editor and he is working on the story. I will make those changes to the first chapter.
i loved that meeting between solar and twilight you portrayed how she would act perfectly
Damn son, I wasn't expecting this at all! I hope things get better.
I like the concept of the chapter but the scene felt forced and i wasnt seeing the reason for the events. I got it hes a kid and dosent understand alot. However i didnt see corelation between celestia saying "she is going to be my new student" to him suddenly thinking his mom was leaving him. Espescialy if hes as bright as they have been saying. But anyway on with the story.
Fire Punch
7113127 Falcon punch?
When i started to read this i was like,
"man i can wait till he meet twilight"
Then he sent her flying and fought her father...
"shit got serious real fast 0_0"
but good story so far will be fav and tracking this
7146809 I'm imagining that the had a fucking tea party right now but the cult hit her invisiblely and blamed in on Solar.
This story really eccalated quickly and twilight will have a trauma about this for all her life and btw amazing
I nearly wanted to say "NO bad Celestia, let your son choose his own Mare".
I think I remember one, or even two guys who lost a battle just because of that.
well okay why not love on first sight....
I guess I don't mind, but I would have liked a better reason for his crush then a school uniform.
I give you a tip, start speaking to him at least.
her inner monologue probably stopped her from doing anything the whole time they were fighting, it couldn't just have taken a few seconds.
7099314 I think I agree with that.
However I still think it was a bit stupid what kind of reaction-span she had while he was fighting. That's probably why she needs all the guads, they need to buy time till Celestia decides what she is going to do, or till she understands the situation.
Sorry I still like it, but it "is" a different quality than what I'm used from some very good authors, at least I have one favourite at the moment.
That doesn't means much more than that you still can get better in my eyes.
I like to offer my opinion, and try to help you this way.
I really hope that he won't get a soft punishment if you don't then you will raise a blueblood
7327418 *do*
Wow that was unexpected. At first I thought it was all a dream but, I guess not. Anyways loving the story so far!
Did not fucking expect that shit... It's kind of refreshing to see. I will continue reading this. Just... Please don't hurt Purple Smart any more.. (Purple Smart is Twilight.)
Damn. Night Light just got his ass handed to him by a 7 year-old.
always wondered why some stories always used the shout your spell out like an asshole as you cast method always seemed like a stupid thing to do and killed flow of fights for me
shouts: Super asshole attack X!!!!
Foe: blocks knowing a spell will be cast.
7864989 that happens sometimes but not all are lucky to avoid it ask krillan
the fire ball strike did he says that out laod?
Holy shit I have never cringed so fucking hard in my life motherfucker!