I woke up, ordered to have breakfast in bed and...
I looked at the nervous maid in front of me, an earth pony mare who had just served me breakfast.
"What is your name maid?"
"Toffee Sparkle your highness."
I raised an eyebrow "Are you related to a Twilight Sparkle?"
"Not as far as I know Princess."
'Must be a coincidence then... wait a minute! Didn't we already said something like that before to each other?" I was sure this was even the third time, even.
"Uh... maybe?" She was so nervous it was kind of adorable.
However I had things to do, so I just ate my breakfast and then let her clean up the mess I made and leave.
Then I started to read all those letters I had got the other day.
It turned to be Moon Dancer reports about Appleloosa, the ponies living there and other smart creatures like the Buffaloes. There was even a tribe of horned rabbits that was causing trouble by stealing the food.
There had been a bit of tension with the Buffaloes but both ponies and Buffaloes had got together to fight off the plague of horned rabbits eating all the food.
I wrote back a letter suggesting they actually let the local coyotes, yes they had those, eat the horned rabbits but not to the point of extinction.
I admit I skipped a lot of Moon Dancer report because it was basically a lot of text, but I saved the letters in a drawer in my desk to read them again later.
I also remembered to praise my student for writing such a detailed report but I suggested that if it was nothing urgent to not sent so many letters at the same time again.
Then I wrote a letter to Sweetie Belle suggesting she might have a great afinity with fire magic and that she should get somepony to train her fine control of her magic to avoid burning food all the time. I also went to the library and copied several control exercises for young unicorn ponies that... had issues with their magic leaking off, to sent to her.
I also told her that I was okay and that killing monsters was not something to do most of the time, but that bugbears and timberwolves were an exception to that rule because of how vicious and evil they were.
I also told her to never ever go alone into the Everfree forest.
Having done that, I took a bath and went to sleep, I stared at the rubber ducky, still wondering were it had come from, then hid it in my mane.
Then I woke up to the sound of thunder, what the buck?
Mechanist Queen Radiance Celestal, ruler of the mechanical city of Canteborg, alicorn mechanist supreme, watched yet another black and white video of what those Griphons were doing. Oh, new Queen? In the same year? What was this, the third or second time?
Honesty, who would have thought the stupid cat birds would become so violent during their civil war?
Worse, she had not figured how to stop the videos being grainy due to magical interference, but at least the things worked. She finally was able to stop using those quite expensive magical orbs that tended to explode for some reason.
"Princess Celestia, is time for your meeting!" Her spunky assistant said to her.
"I am Mechanist Queen Radiance Celestal, I don't go to meetings!"
KRACK-A-THOOM!!!
Dramatic thunder and lighting struck down behind her... were her equipment was.
"MY VIDEO PLAYER IS FRIED! STUPID THUNDER! I TOLD YOU TO DO THAT OUTSIDE!"
The so called Thunder, a brown pegasus, muttered a silent apology.
"Oh dear... not this again... Did you forgot to take your pills your highness!" Her unicorn assistant said. How could a pony that was all pink be such a spoilsport?
"I don't need any stupid pills, I am a the mighty mechanist supreme, my whole body is mechanical!"
"I admit that's an impressive costume, but if you do not go there soon those greedy nobles will steal from the crown more that they usually do."
"Ahh.... fine. Miss Fine, get me one of those pills and a glass of water, but I am keeping tne costume, so I can scare those idiots a bit."
"After the solar flare thing last year, they are always scared of you princess."
"Blame the idiot who thought getting the pony who controls the Sun on soft drugs was a good idea."
"That idiot was yourself your highness."
"I don't regret anything but what happened to Luna! Now get me that pill already!"
Miss Fine have Celestia her pill and a glass of water, after swallowing it the alicorn looked confused for a moment and then looked herself over.
"I did the whole Mechanical Queen routine again, didn't I?"
"Yes you did your highness. Although I admit those devices that you create while you are like that are impressive."
"No rampaging mechanical monster this time, at least?"
"No, we did keep you busy convincing you to conquest Griphonia, as you had instructed us."
"Good. Still keeping the costume on, now that Luna is back I don't need to act so restrained anymore."
Miss Fine raised an eyebrow. "As you wish your highness."
Then a paniqued and sleep depresived Princess Luna entered the room. "TIA! ARE YOU OKAY? WHY WAS LIGHTING STRIKING INSIDE THE CASTLE?"
Princess Luna then noticed the costume her sister was wearing.
"Is that an armor made out of gold?"
"Yes..." Celestia said, her face red as a tomato upon being caught dressed like this.
Luna seemed to think about it for a moment and then said. "Do you think I could get one in silver?"
"Yeah, why not?"
And then Queen Luna from the Lunar republic was playing a board game with her sister.
"Ha! I got the goose to the pond, I win!"
"Lulu, you have to get it to the end square, not to the pond, the pond is a distraction and makes you lose a turn."
"But Tia, gooses love ponds!"
"That's why it is a distraction." Celestia said in a tired tone.
"Okay. You roll two times then."
After a few board games more, Queen Luna felt asleep in her chair, still wearing the silver armor she had got before.
"Princess Celestia, you missed your meeting... again."
"Oh dear, what was it about this time?"
"Let me see..." Miss Fine looked over a bunch of papers. "Something about raising a tool to a bridge?"
"What bridge?"
"The one that connects New Troot City to Haysburg."
"What's that raise of the tool ever for? The bridge is made of Swirl Bricks, they are harder than that coot head was, so there should barely be any maintenance issues. In fact, there shouldn't even be a tool anymore, that bridge was fully paid six years ago!"
"Yes but because you missed th meeting the council probably raised the tool anyway."
"And that's why I can't retire... if only there was a way of making more alicorns..."
"If I may ask, how are alicorns made anyway?" Miss Fine asked, full of curiosity.
"Since me and my sister were found as babies one day, I am afraid that I don't know." After saying that Celestia magically removed the costumes of herself and her sister.
"I think I will take the rest of the day off." Celestia said as she levitated Luna with her magic.
"What if there is an emergency?" Her assistant of course asked.
"If it's some monster or invading army, send a l1etter to Twilight Sparkle, if it's politics, you are now my prime minister, effective right now, I even signed it and everything." Celestia said and showing her terrified secretary a signed and stamped document.
"WHAT? ARE YOU CRAZY?"
"Yes. If you need help, you are authorised to arrest anypony for insubordination, and the royal guard has been ordered to give you their support."
Her spunky assistant turned Prime Minister fainted.
"Dammit! Why does this always happen when I try to get a Prime Minister?"
I woke up having a wooden stick poking my nose but I didn't try to eat it, like I did the previous time.
"Hey Tia, what time is it?"
"Time to lower the sun and raise the moon."
"Okay." Without even waking up of bed, I watched Celestia lower the sun and then I raised the moon.
"What now?" I asked my sister.
"Sister, do you think that I am a bad ruler?" Celestia asked out of nowhere.
"Considering there is still a country for ponies after all this time... I do not think so?"
"I let stupid nobles raise an unfair tax just to have time to expend with you."
"And? You can just lower that tax or remove it, under the treat of ruining the stupid nobles lives, right?"
"Luna, that's not how things work nowadays. I am running a republican monarchy not an absolutist one."
"First, it should be a diarchy since there is two Princess, and second, if you just made a comment saying that tax is unfair, do you think those nobles wouldn't lower it just to get your favor? Or that public support wouldn't get in your side to lower it?"
Celestia lowered her head. "I... I think that would ruin the whole point of letting my.... our little ponies having a say in the way the government is run."
"If our little ponies were capable of ruling this country on their own, then you wouldn't have to keep ruling things, right? You would have becomed a mere decorative figure with no political power."
Now, is not that I don't believe in democracy but let's be honest here, ponies are not humans, without a strong and capable leader they are a disaster. As show again and again and again in both the show and comics.
"That's... a not inaccurate way of viewing things. But I still don't want to abuse my power and influence like that."
"So... do you want me to do it? To play being the rude Princess who is hated by nobles?"
"Pretty please?"
"Fine. But I also want to catch the most corrupt noble, strip him or her of his or her power and money, and let the population hit said roble with rotten fruit."
"Deal!"
Wow... that was easy, she must be really tired of those jerks abusing her lack of time.
"So... who is the most corrupt noble?"
"If I told you, that would be too easy, is part of your responsibilities to find out." My sister said with the kind of tone she uses for public speaking.
"You have no clue, don't you?"
"Lulu, ruling a country takes a lot of time and effort, I literally don't have enough time on the day!"
"Why don't you ask fair Twilight Sparkle to help to organise you schedule? She seems the type to do everything with a checklist... or three."
"Because it would be a huge responsibility and give her a panic attack?"
"Yes, I can completely see that. That's part of the reason I am helping her friends and allies before I start to give her magic lessons." And because I am literally winging it, of course.
Then I tried to pull the rubber ducky from my mane to prank my dister and got... a maid?
"Toffee Sparkle, what the fudge are you doing inside my mane?"
"I have no clue your highness."
At least the look of complete confusion on Celestia's face was priceless.
Seems Luna has her own personal pocket maid, lol.
9945144
Lol, I was laughing when I read the end and now I'm In pain, god That's funny
It's Alive ! And I Love this ! This was a great chapter also sunbutt and moonbutt are best queenie's
I loved the chapter and I Really hope you continue this story, there ONE story kind of like this but it's dead, please keep up the good work and, remember don't rush, we are willing to wait
Love it
all I can thank of now is ponies in 40k armor
1. This really needs a [Random] tag.
2. Also, an editor. The typos, they are multiplying.
3. There is no three.
4. I don't think I'll be tracking this one, sorry.
9945766
You would've gotten a like except for #4
Damn... Next thing you tell us Pinkie is the sane one... Can we have Chrysalis as the royal Waifu at least? Pretty please?
9949725
Is it just me or does this make me want to find a story about Chrissy being the third or fourth princess (or "royal pet/waifu" ) instead of being the Cunt who ruins a wedding and her own life.
9951302
Im actual in planning of it but im german there for translating/gAmmerprovig is a pain and near year end plans eats up all my time ;p
9951827
9951302
I think this here should be intresting for the two of you.
Princess Celestia: The Changeling Queen
have fun
9949692
No alicorn Cadence. She is a pegasus here.
And yes the story could use some editing but people keep nagging me to post more so this is the best I can do with the time I have to write this story.
May I ask when this maybe updated? I mean, next month your going to continue this yes?
This chapter was glorious crack. I loved it. I wonder if Luna can ask Pinkie for advice with her new powers...
"I don't know what is going on, how I got here or what I'm going to do"
Isn't that the same for everyone ever?
You give humans too much credit. Universal Sufferage was the worse thing to have happened to democracy.
As an old dude once said: One person can be smart but people are stupid.
10270462
The point is that humans are perfectly capable to live on their own while ponies are always shown to be unable to do that.
This is really good. Really funny too, love the consept. Wish there was more.
10326812
Thank you. I will try to get back into this story after updating Unlucky Seven.
Good story!
Toffee Sparkle being introduced three times had me so confused though haha. I’m guessing there’s something going on there?
There's a glitch in the matrix...
Me gustó mucho el episodio
two souls in one body? also when will the next chapter come out?
Little bit of an oxymoron as a Republic is a state without a Monarch/Diarch.
It would be a Constitutional Monarchy or Prussian Constitutional Monarchy
Dang it!
I read it too fast
11237508
Unfortunately my cowriter bailed out and so I lost interest.
11237940
Bail? Is he out of prison?
Please when is the next update?!
11422481
No, he quit writing this story.
11452789
I will try to write something pony related in 2023 but I am not sure if it will be a new chapter for this story.
Cause that role isn't PRIME minister i'ts FIRST Minister
11468269
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prime_minister
11468863
Oh, 😄 my bad.
The fuck was this chapter?
Humans are even less capable. Without the threat that nukes present, America run bankruptcy decades ago...
That end was very random
9951302
That story is now public education for quite some time now...