Twilight's Birthday
by Gallifrey
Chapter Four
At Canterlot Castle
The train arrived in Canterlot. The Elements got off, Twilight was carrying her presents, and the Sun was shining with its feeble winter heat through the clear, crisp air. The purple mare ought to be happy, and indeed she was, being in extremely good spirits, and yet... there was something definitely missing.
"Shall we get going?" asked Rainbow, as the rest of them waited patiently on Twilight to make the first move. The unicorn however had been staring into the distance and thinking.
"Hmm? Sorry," she said apologetically, leading them out of the station and up to the Castle.
The trip up to the gates was wholly uneventful. At the gates themselves, however, they were stopped by two guards.
"By order of Her Majesty Princess Celestia and Her Majesty Princess Luna, none may enter without permission."
"Do you know who we are?" said Rarity indignantly.
"Miss Rarity, we know who you appear to be, but after all that changling business, security has had to be tightened, I hope you understand."
"But the Princess knows we're coming," said Twilight, puzzled.
"Yes, we know, and were expecting you. But nevertheless, Princess Celestia handed us these questions that apparently we have to ask you."
"Fire away then, boys," said Applejack, with an air of impatience.
"Twilight Sparkle," said a guard, holding out a short scroll in front of him, "can you prove that you are real?"
"Well, I can't prove it as such, but I can give a well reasoned argument backed up with empirical evidence and data-"
"It also says, 'can you prove that you're not?"
"Wh-what?" said Twilight, suddenly teetering on the edge of an existential crisis.
"That will do," said the guard. "Applejack."
"Yeah?"
"What is the square root of five hundred and forty six?"
Twilight bit her tongue so as not to blurt out the answer.
"Now how in the hay am ah s'posed ta know that? Stop using yer fancy mathematics on me!"
"Mmmhmmm. Fluttershy, where's the weakest point on a bear?"
"Well, I suppose it's the back of the nec- why? Does the Princess want to hurt my animal friends? She can't do that! She can't! Oh dear, I have to hurry home at once to make sure they're okay!"
She actually motioned to leave, but Twilight stopped her.
"Hang on," she whispered.
"Pinkie Pie, what time is it?"
"It's party time," said Pinkie in a sedate manner.
"Rarity, what if I said your dresses looked tacky and outdated?"
"Then I would destroy you!"
"Rainbow Dash, Spitfire says you suck."
"What!?" she squeaked. She was torn between hurt and anger, which was readily showing on her face.
"Well, that concludes the test, and you all passed, with flying colours."
They all looked confused, except Rainbow, who was looking smug because not only did she pass, but it was with flying colours, and she was all about flying colours.
The guards opened the gates for them and bowed them through.
"Well, that was weird," said Twilight, "though I have a bone to pick with the Princess."
---------
There came a gentle knocking on the mahogany doors of Celestia's study.
"Enter," she said.
The door opened and Pinkie Pie bounded in, the other five following in a more ordinary fashion.
"Ah, good afternoon girls!" said the alicorn cheerfully. She looked at Twilight warmly. "Happy birthday, my faithful student."
The unicorn trotted up to Celestia and hugged her.
"Thank you, Princess. Can I ask you something?"
"Why of course you can my dear."
"What was that test outside about?"
The alicorn smiled inwardly at her mischievous questions.
"Did my guards not explain?"
"Well, they did, but-"
"So you understand that it was necessary then, yes?"
"I do, but did it have to be so... odd?"
"I had to ask particular questions I knew your reactions to. I hope that answers you, Twilight dear, but please, I have something to give you," she said, giving her an exquisite leather bound photo album. "So you can recall all the fond memories you make with your friends, I already started it off for you, with some pictures from your foalhood."
She suppressed an awkward smile and gave her a box.
"I also baked you a cake, I hope you like it," she said.
A shadow of anxiety crossed her face as Twilight opened the box to see a slightly wonky and misshapen cake, with icing which someone had attempted to spread evenly... but which wasn't even at all. In spindly letters of green icing the words "Happy birthday, Twilight," were just about legible.
"Do, um, do you like it?" asked a not at all worried Celestia.
Twilight nibbled lightly at the edges.
"As long as it tastes good, that's all that matters, right?" she said, winking and wiping her muzzle of crumbs.
"I suppose you are right," said Celestia, relaxing.
"Thank you for the gifts, Princess."
"You're more than welcome, my dear."
The door creaked slightly as it opened, Luna stuck her head in, wearing a hoodie and watching from a distance. She took a second to look awesome before entering quietly. All had their backs to her except Celestia, who noticed her but kept quiet, a knowing glint in her eyes at what Luna was planning; she was like a lion stalking it's prey, creeping up upon the Elements, all the while keeping her eyes fixed upon Twilight.
"Guess who?!" she shouted, pouncing on Twilight and covering her eyes with her hooves.
"I have no idea!" said Twilight, playing along.
"Luna!" she said excitedly. They turned to face each other and hugged.
"It's been too long, Twilight Sparkle; how are you?"
"I am fantastic, thank you Luna. How are you?"
"Well enough. Well enough. We have a present for you. Happy birthday, Twilight."
"Thank you!" she said, accepting the box that was proffered to her.
Twilight unwrapped it to uncover a mysterious, glowing orb, with swirling, sparkling light stirring in its depths.
"It's gorgeous! What is it?"
"It's a calendar!" she said enthusiastically. "I'll show you how to use it later, there's a knack to it, but once you've got it, it's easy."
"Where did you get it from?"
"I made it myself, from moonbeams, starlight and crystal many years ago. It's quite precious to me really... take good care of it."
"Why are you presenting me with it if it's so valuable?"
"Because... you're worth it, Twilight Sparkle," she replied, blushing slightly.
"Thank you," said Twilight quietly, for what felt like, and probably was the hundredth time that day.
------------
It was late afternoon, and while Pinkie Pie was bouncing around the snowy gardens, under the careful supervision of Fluttershy, and while Rarity admired Luna's thousand year old dresses, and while Applejack and Rainbow Dash chatted to Celestia in her study, Twilight and Luna retired to the alicorn's bedroom.
"Do take a seat Twilight," she said, "would you like anything to drink?"
"Hmmm, what do you have?" asked Twilight, sitting in the middle of the Princess' bed.
"Let me see," said Luna, as she searched a cabinet close to the bed, "there's tea, coffee, um, hot chocolate- oooh, what's this?"
She pulled out a small bottle that seemed to glow in the low light.
"What in Equestria is that?"
"This, Twilight, is Moonshine."
"Moonshine?"
"Yes, it's a very rare liqueur, made by myself, spun from moonlight you see."
"Not really, but it looks bizarre to say the least."
"Would you care to try some?" asked Luna, a mischievous glint in her eyes.
Twilight paused for a second, then remembered it was her birthday.
"Sure, if it tastes as curious as it looks, I bet I'm in for a surprise!"
Luna poured a small measure into two glasses, picked up Twilight with her magic, moving her over slightly, and joined her on the bed.
"Have you enjoyed your birthday so far, Twilight?" asked the alicorn, taking a sip of the drink.
"Oh yes, it's been so nice, everypony has been lovely to me, it feels odd in a way, I'm not really used to it."
"It's always nice to have something like that for a day, but believe me, having it every day becomes a burden."
"Oh?"
"When you're a princess, nopony would dare speak ill of you, everypony is always so polite and well mannered when they address me, it makes us wonder you know; how many of these ponies would extend the same courtesies if we were a 'common' mare. How many of the niceties I receive are actually genuine?"
Twilight looked into the troubled face of the Princess.
"Well, I'm not sure I can answer that... But I do know that I wouldn't treat you any different, to me you are Luna, not Princess Luna, if that makes sense?"
"I think it does, and that means a lot to me, Twilight."
She leaned over and nuzzled the unicorn affectionately.
And so it followed, as the evening progressed, Twilight and Luna had a good catch up with one another. Twilight told Luna all about her adventures and learning she had had with her friends, including the test she took and the crystal ponies. Luna didn't have quite as much to say in return, she told Twilight of her almost daily surprises about modern life she was experiencing as she continued her adjustment into present day society. She also told of the many pranks she played on her sister as the Sun began to set.
"And then," Luna chuckled to herself, throwing her hooves high up in the air, "she stumbled backwards in fright, and fell straight into the bath!"
Twilight giggled as the image formed in her mind's eye. Luna's hooves came down, and accidentally placed one on top of Twilight's. The two mares locked eyes for a moment, each flushing a brilliant shade of crimson. Luna hastily moved her hoof and coughed loudly, Twilight looked resolutely at the opposite wall like it was the most interesting thing she'd ever seen. Then she hiccoughed and launched on that to start a new subject of conversation.
"How much have we drunk?" asked Twilight, looking for the bottle.
Luna pulled it up and they both saw it was half gone.
"Oh dear, we may have had a bit too much," said the unicorn.
She stood up and felt a bit dizzy. The room seemed more wonky than it was before.
"Definitely too much... Should we go down to the others you think?"
"Good idea," said Luna, checking the time. It was later than she expected.
------------
The others had not been idle on the alcohol front, and had shared a glass of wine each that Rarity seemingly pulled out of thin air. Instead of immediately going to a club, it was only early evening after all, they made their twisty and turny way through Canterlot's winding streets to a well renowned pub called The Cross and Arrow. Twilight and Rarity had to combat the icy roads again on the way, the pegasi and alicorn looking on with sympathy from the non slipperiness of the air, and the earth ponies too, wondering what it must be like to have the ground move beneath your hooves.
Upon arrival, a shivering Applejack opened the door and they were all welcomed with a wonderfully warm wind. They filed inside and moved through the friendly looking pub to the back, because that's where the fire was. Luna and Pinkie broke off to get drinks from the bar.
A young couple got up to leave as they approached and Applejack leapt forward to claim their table before anypony else could. Her enthusiasm was justified, it was a table that was close to the fire. Twilight sat down at its head, Rainbow sat to her left, Applejack to Rainbow's left, then Fluttershy. There were three empty chairs left, and Rarity looked decidedly calculating, looking to the bar and then back.
Which seat can I take? she mused.
She sat in the middle seat, leaving two empty seats either side of her.
"What in the hay was that about?" asked Applejack.
"Tactics," said Rarity simply, she looked at Applejack sitting next to Rainbow and allowed herself a small smile. "I see you have employed similar tactics."
"Tactics? What tactics?" asked Rainbow.
"Let me put it this way, Twilight? How did your little private conversation with Luna go earlier?" Her eyes sparkled with the anticipation of gossip.
"We had a catch-up and drank a bit, why?" said an oblivious Twilight.
"Is that all?" said Rarity, looking crestfallen.
"Yes? We're you expecting something else?" she asked curiously.
"Well..." began Rarity, carefully picking her words, "you just seem, to, well, get on with Luna so well, and we thought-"
"Hey, don' drag us into this!" said Applejack.
"I thought you would look just gorgeous together and-"
"What?!" spluttered Twilight. "I don't like Luna in that way- at least, I think so. I've never really liked anypony to tell the truth, or read any books on the matter, so I don't know."
"Huh? Twilight?" said a stunned Rarity, "You mean you've never had a coltfriend?
"No, I haven't," she said nonplussed.
"Please tell me you've at least kissed sompony before."
"Why? Was I supposed to?"
Rarity looked like she was about to faint.
"Twilight Sparkle, twenty one years old and you have still never been kissed?"
"Implying that's a bad thing."
The words were heard, but it was hard to believe they came from Fluttershy. All eyes were suddenly on her.
"I-I'm sorry. It's just, I've never been kissed either..." she all but whispered. "I... I was saving myself for a special stallion."
"I'm sorry Fluttershy, and to you too Twilight, it was an insensitive thing to say."
"That's alright Rarity."
"So Twi," said Rainbow, "do you want to get it on with Luna?"
"I don't know, how do you know if you like somepony?"
"Um... Do you always think about her?"
"Sorta, I think about her more than I do most ponies."
"That's a good start. Do you get all tongue tied whenever you look into her eyes? I know I do when I like somepony."
"No, I don't."
"Hmmmm. Do you wanna kiss her?"
Twilight gave the thought time to mull over, she really wasn't used to this kind of thinking; the answer arrived and she blushed.
"Okie doke, do you ever feel like you're a deer in the headlights?"
Again, she thought hard.
"Well, there was a moment earlier where she touched a hoof, and I all froze up and didn't know what do."
"So girls, what do we think, do you think she likes Luna?"
They all nodded.
"Twilight dear, when she touched your hoof, however accidental it might have looked, she might have done it on purpose to test the waters. Keep an eye out for anything similar during the evening."
"Oh, okay," said the purple mare in light of this new information.
"Don't worry darling, I'll keep an eye out too," she said soothingly, "anyway, act natural, here she comes."
The white unicorn moved the bowl of sugar that was on the table to her right. Pinkie Pie made a beeline for it, setting the drinks on the table and diving her snout into it.
Just as Rarity had planned with her tactics, Luna took the last available seat between the white and purple unicorns.
"I got three red wines," said the alicorn tentatively, hoping she got it correct, "for me, you, and Rarity. Was that right?"
"Yes, thank you Luna," said Twilight graciously, as she stood up, "excuse me though, I have to go to the little fillies room."
"As do I," said Luna hastily. "This is what mares do nowadays, right?" she whispered into Rarity's ear when Twilight's back was turned. She nodded encouragingly.
Luna entered the large, clean room to see Twilight adjusting her mane in a mirror and adding a little blush to her cheeks.
"Hello, Luna," she said cheerfully.
"Twilight," she replied, a small burst of confidence igniting somewhere inside her that gave her the courage to say: "I like what you've done with your mane tonight."
"Do you think so?" she squealed. "I made it just a little more wavy this morning, and added these little star shaped clips this evening."
"I noticed, it is most becoming for you. I- I rather like it."
Twilight beamed at the compliment.
"It'll never compare to yours," she said, "mine can't flow about so prettily. Have you put in some extra stardust?"
"Why yes, I have." It was now Luna's turn to blush, "I didn't think anypony would notice."
"It looks lovely," said the unicorn sincerely, "are you done?"
"I will be in a minute," she replied, studying her mane closely.
"Okay, I can wait."
As they left, Luna held the door open for Twilight, who thanked her both verbally, and with an 'accidental' brush of her body against hers as she walked past. Luna's eyes widened as she felt pleasant sparking shivers race up and down her spine at the contact.
Pinkie Pie noticed their approach.
"Hey Twilight, could you light this up for me?" asked Pinkie, pointing to her small drink.
"What is it?"
"It's sambuca! It tastes great after it's been lit on fire."
"Hmmm, okay."
She shut her eyes and a spark leapt from her horn, igniting Pinkie's shot glass. The pink pony gazed at the small licking flames for a moment, then she then drank it in one.
"Mmmmm, yummy!"
"Ahhh, Pinkie?" said Applejack, "you didn't blow it out."
"Yeah."
"So you just drank burning liquid."
"Mmmhmmm."
Applejack was about to ask 'how?' but then she remembered how. This was Pinkie Pie.
Twilight caught eyes with Luna, and both giggled.
I wonder... If you covered Pinkie with gasoline and lit her on fire, would she freeze over?
Great chapter!
Uuuuuuuh~ I like where this is going. Keep up the good work.
This is cute good work.
Apparently Spike isn't the only one around who is fireproof in someway...
Keep up the good work.
They're admiring manes and Pinkie is drinking burning liquid.
Celestia, save us all...
"Okie doke, do you ever feel like you're a deer in the headlights?"
How would ponies even know about something like that? They don't even have cars in Equestria!
Only thing I noticed was weird, Twilight never thanked Celestia. Even though the princess took time from ruling to try baking Twilight a cake, and all Twilight did was indirectly call it ugly. "As long as it tastes good, that's all that matters, right?" aka: this cake looks like crap.
(Though this is one of my favorite fics, just saying what I thought) Keep up the good work
1136342
That was going through my head as I wrote it. I just wanted to make an Owl City reference, they're everywhere if you look hard enough. XD
1136347
To be fair, the cake did look crap and they both knew it.
But the lack of gratitude was a mistake, I've added a thank you in there now.
1136371
Ah I see. I'm not familiar with Owl City so I never could have guessed the reference.
1136388
It's just a little thing I do with all my fics, for my own amusement of course.
That little test Celestia had them perform got a laugh, loved the reactions. They seemed to be quite well done. But seriously, what's up with Luna and Celestia? When did changelings replace these millennia old and regal women with two giggling schoolgirls?
Seriously. They're older than your grandma but from their acting in this chapter, they certainly didn't seem older than 15. I could see Celestia taking the time to bake a cake for Twilight, if she thought it would amuse her, but feeling insecure about it? Age really does make a difference, even if it's hard to imagine when you're young.
"giving her an exquisite leather bound photo album"
Leather bound? Fluttershy would have a heart attack at the very sight of it! Not to mention that cows are as sentient as ponies in the MLP universe. For the sake of not having a squick moment, let's hope it's really Genuine Imitation Pleather-ette. Ish.
1136587
I always thought their regal professional appearance was just that, an appearance. At heart, they are normal ponies who enjoy having fun and mischief, but are sort of restricted by their jobs. But that's just me. And she would be insecure, she doesn't want Twilight to be disappointed with her gift after all.
1136606
Oh... Didn't think about that. Yes, imitation leather, let's go with that.
1136342 Or do they? "May the Best Pet Win" tells us they have guns and tanks, so... And trains and carriages and wagons have headlights too. Also, Pinkie Pie.
Oh, Pinkie.
1136084
Ofc not she would just say shes hotter now and as soon as she drinks a whiskey on the rocks she would extinguish herself.
Btw anyone can drink burning liquid, it just burns more going down but it will extinguish itself by itself when you close your mouth. Its safer to bow the fire out before you drink because if you miss even a drop when you drink it you will be set on fire.
GONNA GET IT ON!
1136669
It has nothing to do in regards to being normal or not.
Well, that's not entirely true, it has Everything to do with it. Just not the way you mean it.
A normal person get jaded. It's part of ageing, it's why you don't think the same joke is funny when you've hard it 10 times before. That goes for All experiences, good and bad, and what's worse is that it never stops. The older you get, the more experiences you acquire, the more jaded you'll become. When we're talking a timespan that reaches across millennia, you just have to imagine how all of this piles up. Something Celestia might call a "Passing fancy", might very well take her 40 years and make her an expert in the field.
That's not to say she can't laugh, she can't have fun. But the older you get, the more significant the experience will have to be for you to register it as New. Just imagine how many students, friends, "adopted daughters" or other close acquaintances Celestia must have had in this timespan. Imaging living with the knowledge that, in an all too short time, they'll all move on. Just like everyone before them. Each year bringing them one step closer to leaving, while you know that you'll live on.
That's why it's sometimes called the curse of immortality. Living forever sounds good on paper, but think about what it actually means.
1136759
We've never actually seen a gun so bullet being mentioned in may the best pet win could have meant any kind of projectile, not just one fired from a gun. A tank does not have to be a modern day army tank. Look at Leonardo da Vinci's tank for an example. The train from "Over a barrel" did not have a functional light. The carriages and wagons we have seen so never used any kind of illumination.
Therefore it's probably just Pinkie being Pinkie. Listen to me, arguing about the fine details of ponies. What am I doing with my life?
1136857
Be that as it may, (it is a good point) this is a just a little light hearted story about Twilight's birthday. Now, if I wrote a Celestia centric fic with the theme of immortality, then I would take all those points into consideration, but for the purposes of this story, it is all but irrelevant. We all have our faults, and one of Celestia's is that she bakes shit cakes.
1136879
Life. You're doing it right, my friend.
Sorry, but as soon as I read that, I couldn't help but think of this.
1136985
Don't worry, it was intentional. Glad someone noticed.
1136883
Its perfectly OK if Celestia can not bake a cake as long as she understands the perfect beauty that is the Eating of the Cake!
Sambuca? To start with?
I would have expected a long island ice tea, a fuzzy navel, a zombie or something else fruity.
starting with the strong stuff?
Oh Yea! Oh this is gonna be a Good Night!
^^ loved it! keep up the grewat work! (why is there no luna emoticon?)
This is great fun to read, but one thing...
I can't picture Rainbow Dash ever saying 'shall we;' Rarity for sure and probably Twilight and Fluttershy, but most certainly not RD, Applejack, or Pinkie Pie.
1136669 you know how laurne writes them maybe they write wierd book with cars in them maybe?
"Rainbow Dash, Spitfire says you suck."
"What!?" she squeaked.
I laughed.
"Well, that concludes the test, and you all passed, with flying colours."
They all looked confused, except Rainbow, who was looking smug because not only did she pass, but it was with flying colours, and she was all about flying colours.
Twice.
Yet another wonderful chapter
1136985
After I saw that reference, a small part of me hoped that Gallifrey would add the line
"do you ever feel like a paper bag"
when rarity was questioning twilight
1136084
Pinkie can be so cold she'd fall into a volcano and freeze to death.
Pinkie can be so hot she can set ice cubes on fire.
Umad regular ponies?
Wat U did there... I C it and I like it.
For those of you who didn't get it, go read this mandatory story.
I like!
My AppleDash senses are tingling...
The questions at the start were fantastic. Definitely looking forward to future updates.
Yyyyyes. I enjoy this story. Its good to have a light-hearted romance story. For some reason, the LUna wearing a hoodie made me laugh... I don't know why. Maybe its because I can't seen ANY pony wearing a hoodie awesomely.
Keep up the good work!
1136162
Of course! It would be a crime not to think of Scootaloo.
1136985
I'm glad someone posted that so I wouldn't have to.
>> "...including the test she took and the crystal ponies."
I love that authors everywhere are referencing material that isn't even canon yet.
Not a criticism, just amusing.
:D
1140821
I am the Captain Obvious this story needs, not the one it deserves.
YOU SHALL BURN NEXT TO REBECCA BLACK HERSELF, YOU HERETIC
I mean, I enjoyed this chapter! Starting to get the first hints of... later
I call Trollestia on that quiz.
Luna's Moonshine? Ive read too many fanfiction to know where this is going.
1136879
All the right things, my friend.
Lemme just say, you wirte Luna well. Some people go overboard with the pranky/alchoholy/childy side, but you do it well enough to keep humor but not overdo it. s3.roosterteeth.com/images/blue_kurt4e8f40361be2a.jpg
Also, guys, give some credit to celestia, at least she tried
static.fjcdn.com/comments/3576978+_030cd823cefc5ab90d2af7ef6b660118.png
(SOCKS)
Applejack, you should know better than to question ANYTHING Pinkie does
oh... i forgot to comment on this... well... the build-up to the whole "omg we should totally hook twi up with lulu"
was... well... none existing... and that kinda sucked (made little to no sense).
Ah, moonshine! I've never had it as of course I'm underage but I remember seeing many of my family members try some.
Oh their faces and reactions were PRICELESS!!!!
Especially when my uncle thought a cherry was to sweeten the taste but it had been soaked in the stuff!!!! Ah good times!
Anyway thanks for this AMAZING story! Keep up the good work!
listening to woodentoasters song and they match this
Oh! Oh God! My sides, they hurt!
I can't breathe!
Someone, please, how do I oxygen!?
Send help!