first on this chapter? huh..... so im not one to make incredibly detailed and philosophical, or whatever word your supposed to use, comments, so im going to keep this super simple: in my opinion, this was great i want to see more and cant wait for your next update <----emote related, its Rarity in her inner turmoil
You write Rarity very well. I don't get to say this often about clopfics, but this is classy as hell. I do think you could take out the more explicit parts and still have a very excellent, emotional shipfic, but we'll see where this goes. :)
I gotta say this is a really nice job for a mature fic, and even though I don't really ship Flarity I'm still looking forward to seeing where this goes next, and when I say I'm reading it for the plot I honestly mean it
I want to apologize for taking so long on the next chapter... Rarity had a better idea for the next part than I did, which means this thing is going to end up about twice as long as I'd anticipated, and my ratio of stuff to be written vs. time to write it in has been unfavorable. I think I should be able to crank out a couple of chapters in the next week or so, though... I really just need one good session to finish 4.
The frantic urge to move seemed to leach out through her pores
Should be "Leech" like the creature.
Aside from that, another magnificent chapter. I feel somewhat bad commenting on EVERY single chapter as I read, but meeh. It's good and so are you. Look forward to reading/commenting on every one from here out!
1127760 No, it actually shouldn't. I looked that one up to be sure. "Leech" means "parasitize" -- Uncle Larry leeched off of us until Dad gave him the heave-ho. "Leach" means "wash out" -- The flavor of old coffee leached into the water.
“Silly filly,” she smiled as she did some needlework on a chic but restrained business collar for the mayor. “As I suspected, it was merely hormones. All taken care of now.” And the disagreeable little voice in the back of her mind could just shut up about it, thank you very much.
*fistpump* It was the latter! Yes! *reads on intently*
Okay, so Rarity isn't beating herself up at fantasizing so... forcibly, but she IS conflicted. It's not exactly what I had expected out of this chapter, but it's certainly close. This story is moving in all the right directions, and I'm thoroughly reminded why it's on my 'recommended reading' list.
The work day grows short and thusly busy, so I shall continue this rambling running commentary later. For now, I will say kudos to you for another excellently-delivered chapter.
+ rarity is being cute - sparse setting descriptions make things feel a bit unreal. I don't think I'm quick to have a problem with this, usually, but I do here + the idea seems to be that Rarity's been attracted all along, and it just took seeing Fluttershy in a sexy outfit to realize it, which is something I could get behind - Rarity thinks homosexuality necessitates justification - convenient f/f romance book shows up - Rarity writes an anonymous note (coming up next)
I think I'll drop this... but it did keep my interest up for three chapters.
but the solitary rack of romance novels still offered little she hadn't read before.
So? I fail to see the problem - I went through most of high school reading Harry Potter over and over again. Re-reading books can actually be quite an interesting experience, as you can see signs in earlier books that point to later events (for example, Dumbledore's 'Put-Outer', or 'Deluminator' - it's got two names - is first shown in The Philosopher's/Sorcerer's Stone [America didn't think kids were smart enough to figure out what a 'Philosopher's Stone' was, so they changed the name. Kids aren't dumb, America], but becomes vitally important in The Deathly Hallows. At the end of The Goblet of Fire, Dumbledore gets a 'sparkle in his eye' when Harry mentions how a revived Dark Lord took his blood to use in his regeneration; this isn't elaborated upon until The Deathly Hallows, where it's revealed this, alongside Harry's curse scar, allowed Harry to survive instant death one last time. Finally, the diary that possessed a student in The Chamber of Secrets? The Half-Blood Prince reveals it was a soul-canister known as a 'horcrux'). So yeah, re-read books. It can actually be an interesting experience.
You’re projecting your own concerns onto a personal matter. Imagine someone who felt herself the very height of traditional, heterosexual, societal norms being taken over by desires she had never considered before. Would that person, or pony, be so willing to accept that her actual self is so different from her lifelong perception? Of course she will make excuses and justifications. She hasn’t yet accepted that this might be who she is. She thinks it’s errant, or a one-time, offhand interest. Hormones. Loneliness. I’m sure thousands of gay people have gone through the same woes and struggles and dilemmas. Not everyone is okay with discovering their own sexuality—not right away. Especially when you’re dealing with it all alone and you think something is wrong with you.
As for the romance novel, suspend your disbelief a bit. Think—it’s always been on the shelf. She just never noticed it until now...I wonder why?
Pinkie Pie would… well, the stars alone knew what Pinkie Pie would do on the best of days, but her default response seemed to be “throw a party at it”.
I so want this to be the theme of the next chapter.
first on this chapter? huh.....
so im not one to make incredibly detailed and philosophical, or whatever word your supposed to use, comments, so im going to keep this super simple:
in my opinion, this was great
i want to see more and cant wait for your next update
<----emote related, its Rarity in her inner turmoil
Love it! Love everything about this. Well written. Keep it up!
I adore this, inner turmoil around finding yourself attracted to someone of your own gender? Myy faavourite topic. For some reason!
Keep it up!
You write Rarity very well. I don't get to say this often about clopfics, but this is classy as hell. I do think you could take out the more explicit parts and still have a very excellent, emotional shipfic, but we'll see where this goes. :)
495688
Thank you so much! I've actually considered doing just that... but, like you say, we'll see.
Better n better
I gotta say this is a really nice job for a mature fic, and even though I don't really ship Flarity I'm still looking forward to seeing where this goes next, and when I say I'm reading it for the plot I honestly mean it
I'm really enjoying this, Jot Jiggety Jog. Your descriptions are very vivid and paint a very clear picture. And I like it
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img.ponibooru.org/_images/c6fe908ae9e9b43546a02bb7b8be6a45/171713%20-%20rarity.png
*faints from happy*
Nicely done :D
I want to apologize for taking so long on the next chapter... Rarity had a better idea for the next part than I did, which means this thing is going to end up about twice as long as I'd anticipated, and my ratio of stuff to be written vs. time to write it in has been unfavorable. I think I should be able to crank out a couple of chapters in the next week or so, though... I really just need one good session to finish 4.
558341 That's a relief, I was worried this awesome story was going to die off. Thanks for letting us know.
The internal monologue of a drama queen. It's... interesting in a good way.
'Throw a party at it.' AT it. Pure pinkie.
937294
Eeeyup.
Should be "Leech" like the creature.
Aside from that, another magnificent chapter.
I feel somewhat bad commenting on EVERY single chapter as I read, but meeh. It's good and so are you. Look forward to reading/commenting on every one from here out!
1127760
No, it actually shouldn't. I looked that one up to be sure.
"Leech" means "parasitize" -- Uncle Larry leeched off of us until Dad gave him the heave-ho.
"Leach" means "wash out" -- The flavor of old coffee leached into the water.
Extra space.
Sorry, my OCD flares and goes into a frenzy when I see extra spaces.
I'll shutup and keep reading now...
Seeing as how the sun is coming up and I can hear birds chirping, it's time for bed
Drat.... I'm quite enjoying this fic so far
And Rarity?
You got it bad girl
I have to just say this: this fic makes me happy! It satisfies the grammar Nazi inside me, and has a great plotline! Keep up the good work!
*fistpump*
It was the latter! Yes!
*reads on intently*
Okay, so Rarity isn't beating herself up at fantasizing so... forcibly, but she IS conflicted. It's not exactly what I had expected out of this chapter, but it's certainly close. This story is moving in all the right directions, and I'm thoroughly reminded why it's on my 'recommended reading' list.
The work day grows short and thusly busy, so I shall continue this
ramblingrunning commentary later. For now, I will say kudos to you for another excellently-delivered chapter.hmmhh
+ rarity is being cute
- sparse setting descriptions make things feel a bit unreal. I don't think I'm quick to have a problem with this, usually, but I do here
+ the idea seems to be that Rarity's been attracted all along, and it just took seeing Fluttershy in a sexy outfit to realize it, which is something I could get behind
- Rarity thinks homosexuality necessitates justification
- convenient f/f romance book shows up
- Rarity writes an anonymous note (coming up next)
I think I'll drop this... but it did keep my interest up for three chapters.
So? I fail to see the problem - I went through most of high school reading Harry Potter over and over again. Re-reading books can actually be quite an interesting experience, as you can see signs in earlier books that point to later events (for example, Dumbledore's 'Put-Outer', or 'Deluminator' - it's got two names - is first shown in The Philosopher's/Sorcerer's Stone [America didn't think kids were smart enough to figure out what a 'Philosopher's Stone' was, so they changed the name. Kids aren't dumb, America], but becomes vitally important in The Deathly Hallows. At the end of The Goblet of Fire, Dumbledore gets a 'sparkle in his eye' when Harry mentions how a revived Dark Lord took his blood to use in his regeneration; this isn't elaborated upon until The Deathly Hallows, where it's revealed this, alongside Harry's curse scar, allowed Harry to survive instant death one last time. Finally, the diary that possessed a student in The Chamber of Secrets? The Half-Blood Prince reveals it was a soul-canister known as a 'horcrux').
So yeah, re-read books. It can actually be an interesting experience.
6858037
“Rarity thinks homosexualty necessitates justification”
You’re projecting your own concerns onto a personal matter. Imagine someone who felt herself the very height of traditional, heterosexual, societal norms being taken over by desires she had never considered before. Would that person, or pony, be so willing to accept that her actual self is so different from her lifelong perception? Of course she will make excuses and justifications. She hasn’t yet accepted that this might be who she is. She thinks it’s errant, or a one-time, offhand interest. Hormones. Loneliness. I’m sure thousands of gay people have gone through the same woes and struggles and dilemmas. Not everyone is okay with discovering their own sexuality—not right away. Especially when you’re dealing with it all alone and you think something is wrong with you.
As for the romance novel, suspend your disbelief a bit. Think—it’s always been on the shelf. She just never noticed it until now...I wonder why?
I so want this to be the theme of the next chapter.