Silent Memories

This story has been marked as having adult content. Please click below to confirm you are of legal age to view adult material in your country.

Confirm

Comments ( 7 )

Viewing 1 - 50 of 7
- Newest First
- Oldest First

Mr Marshmallow

Mr Marshmallow #1 · Apr 14th, 2014 · · · The End and the Beginning ·

You have snared my attention.

TheBronyWithaBlueBox

TheBronyWithaBlueBox #2 · Apr 14th, 2014 · · · The End and the Beginning ·

You had my interest, now you have my attention

Urist McWriter

Urist McWriter #3 · Apr 14th, 2014 · · · The End and the Beginning ·

Looks good mate, keep it up.

ilikepie1076

ilikepie1076 #4 · Apr 14th, 2014 · · · The End and the Beginning ·

Need to work on the spelling more but it is a very nice plot with fluent writting.... Faved and liked

Snowfyre

Snowfyre #5 · Apr 14th, 2014 · 1 · · The End and the Beginning ·

thousand mile long meteor? more like planetoid, that certainly will wipe everything out and then some
that's near half the diameter of the moon

Snowfyre

Snowfyre #6 · Apr 16th, 2014 · 1 · · New World, New Life ·

eh? no mane and tail? whats the point of that? unless there is a specific reason why other than just to be different, which your character already is, try to stay away from unnecessary minor features for your OC, they tend to be easy to forget

also with the tail, there are 2 parts, the dock and the skirt, the skirt is the hair that you see on the tail, the dock is the flesh and bone bit, you don't indicate if both parts are gone or just the skirt

I suspect that the name Daring gave "Bronze Shield" is based off of his looks, but you mention nothing of his colors except his eyes
while I understand that he would be surprised about how he looks, and the need to find out what he looks like, but doing so in front of daring, doesn't help much with the fact that he should act like he is supposed to know to keep with his lie.

also does he have both colt and filly parts or just filly? bit confusing with the fact he is called a colt by daring multiple times, despite the filly bits

BronzeUnicorn