The Shipping Games

by Skystriker

Two colts and a Princess trot into a bar...

With her sister busy attempting to couple Twilight Sparkle with a stallion in Ponyville, Princess Luna had decided to take things into her own hooves for once and attempt a ship of her own. She had come a long way in her understanding of matching ponies, and the techniques involved with it since her rather embarrassing start. She decided to branch out a bit, and try to ply her skills in another town, so there was no possibility of either of the two interfering with each other. She chose a town on the border of her dominion, the recently constructed settlement of Appleoosa. It was a rough and tumble little town, as most of the settlements on the frontier tended to be. Princess Luna marveled at the self-sufficient, hard working, and obviously dedicated inhabitants of the small frontier town. This settlement was much like the ones that had transformed into the various large cities that now spanned across the land, and it was for this reason that she chose this particular town. She had arrived very early in the morning, just as her sister was rising the sun over the land, and was able to slip in with the early morning cloud cover. Even with the pink and orange shades of dawn just starting to bathe the town in light, it was already bustling with busy ponies going about their daily business. As she observed the townsfolk she began to think about this new hobby she and her sister had taken up, and the consequences of it.

“I am certain Tia will be most proud when she learns of my success here this day.” She thought with a smile.
“I wonder which of my subjects are in most dire need of affection.” She pondered to herself, then her eyes went wide as she thought of something she had not considered before.

Princess Luna magically procured her abacus from her bag and did some speedy calculations upon it, the little beads clacking and whirring wildly as she did so, and she came to a rather shocking conclusion.

“At the rate sister is proceeding, even with Equestria’s slightly larger ratio of mares to stallions, Tia may inadvertently cause a shortage of mares for the stallions, and in the process leave Equestria dangerously underpopulated in the coming centuries!” Luna gasped at the revelation.
“There is only one solution, I must couple, mate, join, oh blast the stars what did sister call it? No matter! I must create colt couples! Wait...that solves nothing...oh well, It may not solve the possible impending population decline, but at least the poor stallions shall not be lonely.” Luna decided as the morning sun finally crept its way up, bathing the land in daylight.

As she hid above the frontier town upon one of the higher clouds, she passively observed the little settlement, looking for her potential couple to be. She was considering the sheriff as a possible candidate, when out of nowhere somepony zoomed past her going so fast that it caused her cloud to spin around wildly, nearly throwing her from it. When her eyes stopped spinning, and she overcame the dizzying effects of being spun around so quickly, she saw that the pony responsible was Commander Soarin’. She recognized him even out of uniform, as she and the Commander had met several times since she had returned from exile, and she easily recognized his powder blue coat and dark blue mane, as well as his cutie mark. She knew a little bit about him, and also knew that being a Wonderbolt he didn’t have much time for relationships, so she would be doing him a favor in finding him a suitable mate. As she recalled he was incredibly fond of pies, and there just so happened to be a very cute stallion close to his age working the pie stand. That stallion, unbeknownst to her was Braeburn, Applejack’s cousin, and owner of the Appleoosa Orchard. She could imagine how cute the two would look together, and she rubbed her hooves together and smiled gleefully at the adorable image she had in her mind. Although, now she had the challenging task of figuring out how she could get the two interested in one another.

“The pies shall be the catalyst to the formation of this union.” Luna said to herself as she held her hoof in the air triumphantly.

Luna’s horn began to glow faintly and a breeze started to blow down the main street of the tiny town blowing the smell of fresh baked pies down the streets towards Soarin’, the scent seemied as if it had hypnotized the handsome pegasus, drawing him towards it. This was a good start, but she knew she would have to think of something more substantial if she wished to get these two colts together. She pensively thought on how her sister might deal with this situation in a subtle and distant way that would allow her to affect the situation from afar, and frustratingly came up with nothing.

“If I cannot do this from afar. I shall have to go down there in disguise, but as who?” She thought.
“I know I shall disguise myself as a male! Nopony would suspect a new stallion to be their beloved princess.” Luna thought to herself and closed her eyes as she cast her disguise spell upon herself.

When she the spell had taken full effect her body had changed to that of a stallion, her coat was still the beautiful midnight blue it always was, but her mane had changed to pure jet black, and instead of long and flowing it was curly and matted to her scalp. Her eyebrows had grown large and bushy, upon her lips grew a big bushy moustache, her nose had become slightly deformed, and on top of it all she now had a thick pair of spectacles over her eyes. She was pleased when she looked down and saw that Soarin’ was almost at the pie stand, and in the blink of an eye she teleported to a back alley next to the market. She then looked down at herself, and realized even all dolled up like a buck she would never pass as normal with horns and wings. Another quick spell made her wings fade from view, and she stepped out into the marketplace, and subtly made her way towards the pie stand.

“Where art thou...ah there you are Commander.” Luna whispered to herself as she saw Soarin’ trotting over.
“A little spell should be enough to tantalize ones senses.” She thought and cast a subtle spell upon Braeburn that made him smell very strongly of fresh baked apple pies.

Luna smiled as she looked around the marketplace, sure of herself and her disguise, knowing nopony would know her, it gave her a sense of freedom, she wasn’t Nightmare Moon or one of The Princesses now, she was a simple pony in a simple town. She quickly shook the thoughts from her head,as she remembered the real reason she was there. She was going to join these two stallions, and make her sister proud of her. She couldn’t help but notice a slight stirring inside her as she paused on her mental image of the two, Commander Soarin’ and the admittedly cute looking stallion. She then watched in awe as Soarin devoured one of the pies in about ten seconds flat, face first. The cute looking stallion in the booth rolled his eyes then collected his bits, and the two had a quick conversation that ended with a green coated mare, with an apple-cart cutie mark, taking over the stand while the two trotted off together. Luna wasn’t able to catch any of their conversation aside a few random words, one of which finally told her this cute stallion’s name, Braeburn. She gleefully smiled and tried to discreetly follow the pair, barely able to believe how well her plan was going. Her sister would be so proud of her.

“Where art thou going children? The town is not so large that you have many places thou could go.” Luna thought to herself as she ducked behind a wagon to avoid being seen.
“Maybe if I were to get a bit closer I could determine their motives.” Luna concluded, and started to close the distance between herself and the two.

Luna ducked between two wagons to try and get around a crowd of ponies, while completely fixated on the two, and ended up jamming her sharp horn right into the sensitive posterior of a large buffalo. The creature yelped loudly, and jumped far higher into the air than she would have ever guessed he would have been able to. When he landed hit the wooden floorboards so hard that he uprooted the nails that held the floorboards down, and sent a poor painter pony, who was high up on a ladder, into a cart full of hay below. Luna looked up just in time to see Soarin scoop Braeburn up in his hooves, and carry him up into the air to avoid the falling scaffolding. She also could have sworn she saw Braeburn nuzzle into his chest as he held him up there, but it may have just been the angle she was looking from. After apologising profusely to the buffalo she accidentally injured, she continued on the trail of the pair, who had stopped off for a cider at the town saloon.

“If only I could hear what they were saying, but that accursed piano and this rabble in here is drowning out everything.” Luna frustratedly mused to herself.
“Perhaps I should evaluate if this pair is even interested in one other in the way in which I desire them to be.” She concluded, as she realized that in this day and age what she had seen thus far might just be the way friends act toward one another.

Luna also knew just how to test her hypothesis in a very subtle way. She reached out with her magic and intertwined their tails as they sat at the bar next to each other. She came to the conclusion that if the two did not separate their tails immediately then they must be at least somewhat attracted to one another. Unfortunately just as she joined their tails together, a passing waitress bumped into her flank and spilled a tray full of mugs of cider all over her, drenching her in the ice cold cider. This caused her wings, which were still invisible, to flare out wide, sending another waitress’ platter all over her as well. The two mares apologized frantically as they started wiping her off from horn to hooves, but by the time the two had finished wiping her off the two had undone their tails, and Luna was still no closer to finding out an answer, although she was far stickier now for her trouble.

“This is simply intolerable! I shall simply have to take more drastic steps, I’m sure sister would approve of my methods.” Luna said under her breath in an annoyed tone as her eye twitched slightly.

The princess then produced a packet of a special blend of herbs that when blended just right created a powerful aphrodisiac, and fertility treatment in males. As she held the tiny packet in her magical grasp she frowned a bit, and began to consider if this was really such a benevolent act. To go to these lengths to bring two ponies together...is it right? She thought to herself for a good few minutes before deciding to use a smaller amount, just enough to perk their interest, as it were, if there was some interest there it would definitely bring it out. She broke out into a little smile as she saw Soarin lean in and whisper something into Braeburn’s ear that made the cute little stallion blush slightly, followed by a quick gentle nibble on the ear. This was it, the sign she had been looking for, now the only thing left to do was to observe them a little longer to ensure they completed their courtship. The two left the saloon, and started off towards the Apple Family orchard on the outskirts of Appleoosa. Luna was positively ecstatic that she had managed to pull this off without any help from her sister, but she could not shake a nagging feeling in the back of her mind telling her that this wasn’t something she should be proud of.
She watched the two affectionately nibbling at one another’s mane and ears as they trotted side by side, their lust plain for any to see.

“Look how happy they are, this must be a righteous act...mustn't it?” She continued to question herself as she watched the two walk into Braeburn’s home.

Luna trotted up to the window of the single story ranch house, and watched as Soarin’ pressed Braeburn up against the wall and kissed him deeply as he slowly pushed his hat off of his head, revealing his adorably messy orange mane. Soarin’s body was toned and athletic, a near perfect example of what a pegasus stallion should look like when in his prime. Braeburn on the other hoof, while toned as well, had a slightly more effeminate curve to his body that made him appear almost like a filly in comparison. Soarin’ was clearly leading him along as the two moved over to the bed, never once breaking their long, deep, and passionate kiss. Soarin’s hoof gently caressed Braeburn’s cutie mark, causing him to let out a soft moan into the kiss. Braeburn then tossed off his vest, and grinded his now bare form against Soarin’ seductively. It was all happening so fast, their hooves were all over each other’s bodies, rubbing and caressing every inch they could.

It was evident by their growing ‘excitement’ that the two of them were going to get truly intimate sooner rather than later, and the Princess could take it no longer. She knew the only reason these two were doing anything was because of her, and she could not deny how dishonest it felt. Between Rainbow Dash and Applejack had started as a joke, and Rarity and Fluttershy had clearly had some chemistry, but these two, as far as she knew, had only met a few hours ago. She had forced this, and now she knew what she had to do. She dispelled her magical disguises and burst through the front door, then into the bedroom where Braeburn was sitting upright on his haunches in Soarin’s lap, as the pegasus sat back with his hooves behind his head. The two blushed bright red as they laid eyes on Princess Luna as she barged into their bedroom.

“Neigh children, stop this at once, thou hast been deceived by me into partaking in this union!” Luna shouted in the royal Canterlot voice.
“What the hay?!” Braeburn cried as he pulled the sheets up over himself.
“Thy fornication is under false pretenses I am solely responsible for the events that transpired to bring it to pass!” She continued, her voice so loud that the windows were shaking.
“Uhm beggin’ your pardon Princess, but no yah weren’t.” Braeburn sheepishly replied.
“What?” Luna asked, her voice now calmed, and a tone of incredible confusion in it.
“Princess we’ve been together for months, and unless you were just in a really bad disguise today while you incredibly obviously followed us around, and before you were stealthier than a ghost’s shadow you had very little to do with what’s happening in this bedroom, your majesty.” Soarin answered, trying his best to retain his respectful tone.
“Months... So I.... The things I did? Was my disguise truly so ineffectual?” Luna sheepishly asked.
“We mighta been fooled, if’n yah’d rememberd to change yer cutie mark. It’s sorta unmistakable an’ unique, Princess.” Braeburn replied as he hid as much of himself as he could.
“So I am not responsible for your relations this eve?” Luna asked, feeling as if a large weight had been removed from her chest.
“No Princess.” The two answered in unison.
“Oh, well uhmm, my apologies for intruding upon your moment of intimacy.” Luna sheepishly replied as she rubbed her hoof through her astral mane.

The three then shared an awkward silence, and Luna began to ask if she could stay, only to receive two feather pillows to the face in reply, which she took in stride given how she had so rudely interrupted them. She teleported herself back to her study in Canterlot, and upon hearing that Celestia had left for Ponyville, and not yet returned, she penned a scroll to her sister.

Dear Sister,

I have had a great epiphany this day whilst attempting to couple a pair on my own. I have come to the realization that what we are doing is not as benevolent a deed as I once thought it was. I believe that we are wrong to be manipulating ponies lives simply for the sake of our enjoyment, and that saying this game is for any other purpose would be dishonest. It is my sincerest wish that you cease and desist any plans for future coupling attempts, and consider disbanding any that are not true in the hearts of the ponies you have coupled. Please sister, I implore you end game before we you hurt somepony permanently. Please.

-Luna

“One more card to play.” Celestia whispered as she added a picture of her sister to the box of pictures

As always everypony I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Favorites and comments are a always greatly appreciated they really help inspire me to keep writing and doing the best I can. ^.^. (extra points to anypony who figures out who luna is disguised as.)

Comments

[Midnight herald]

OH SHIT Luna's getting dragged into all of this? I love how she continues to make little mistakes, like her cutie mark blunder.
Will Celestia just ship the neighsayers to keep them out of the loop, or does she think of it as some twisted form of sisterly compassion? Anyways, loved the chapter as always. I'm excited for when the shit hits the fan.

[Gabriel LaVedier]

Yea. Yea. Fare thee well.

[Menoshe]

Oh my. Celestia has gone mad with power.

[Zanmatsuken]

Oh god, Luna is added to the ship list. That'll be interesting. Funny chapter as always.

As for Luna's disguise, I would guess it is similar to either Cogwork's Prince Artemis(with some obvious changed due to necessity) or a liking to Twi's dad, Nitelite or something like that. If neither of those my third guess is some OC pony that I have never seen.

[ArmourFox]

Yep. Yep. Yep. Braeburn and Soarin' OTP

[TimeWarp]

Luna is about to get caught in the crossfire...

[mysterious_colt]

as much fun as always
i'm really looking forward to the next chapter
i'm interested to see with whom twi and luna will be shipped

[Paper Crease]

>It is my sincerest wish that you cease and desist any plans for future coupling attempts, and consider disbanding any that are not true in the hearts of the ponies you have coupled.
>It is my sincerest wish that you cease and desist any plans for future coupling attempts
>cease and desist

“One more card to play.” Celestia whispered as she added a picture of her sister to the box of pictures.

Celly should stop; she's going insane with her trickiness and, if left alone, may cause her kingdom to be too busy being infatuated with each other to function properly and efficiently. Or maybe she might even be too busy playing the matchmaker to function properly herself, sending the kingdom into chaos.

[Skystriker]

592171

why the green text?

Also so glad all of you are enjoying the update thus far, I've got some very big things planned for this story in the coming weeks that I think you all will really love.

[Dash Is Best Pony]

That was so adorable.

Colt-cuddling.

Just that name.

Goddess, so damn adorable.

ADORABLE. AGH.

[Paper Crease]

593628
Pretty sure that somewhere on the internet that green text refers to implying something.
Lemme put my comment this way:
"It is my sincerest wish that you cease and desist any plans for future coupling attempts"
"cease and desist"
Good luck with that, equal princess of Equestria, Luna.

[Genjen]

Haha, I like how you wrote Luna in this. That naivety finally showing itself in a totally awkward moment, excellent. The last line where Celestia, instead of taking heed of her sisters pleas, just goes and adds her to the list of potential "victims" was priceless.

"Oh foolish little sister of mine. If you don't play the game, you get played."

[GBGamer]

Damn you! Why no Caramac?!

[GBGamer]

I do like this pairing, though. This is one of the few pairings I wish were canon.

[Ravenmoon05]

Awww Now Luna has been entered into the games, It'll be interesting to see who she's paired with

[Natzo]

Some TwiLuna is coming?

[Sengachi]

Luna is going to either be shipped with Twilight or Pinkie Pie. Ho boy.

[Skystriker]

Sorry that the update is a little late everypony, kinda been working a lot and not feeling good the last few days, but I have a fair bit done and I promise you all will not be dissapointed, and unless your psychic I guarantee you wont see it coming, and if you are don't spoil the surprise! I will only say that there will be Pinkie Pie!

[Lightning Shaker]

A fun and interesting story so far, though I have to point out that "fillyfooler" and "coltcuddler" imply something far more sinister than same sex relationships... other than that far to often used in many fics poor choice of words this is really great, you got Pinkie Pie down pat, and I am intrigued by the idea of Luna shipping. I'll give a watch and a fav, and because I enjoy doing it also a Scootacute.

[werewolf435]

590004 Or extreme boredom combined with immortality

[Brony2]

her disguise reminds me of something from Past Sins
hmmmm

[nyiff]

Bad idea Luna, soon your going to be the one who gets shipped

Now lets get ready...
And for some reason I have the nagging feeling it will be Luna Pie because their the two who confront her about the plan!

[FierceRainbow]

Apple Family orchard on the outskirts of Appleoosa
Need a 'lil L there.
before we you hurt
Just one or the other.
Really enjoying the story so far! I was too engrossed to comment up until now and I need to continue reading.