Well, this is new...

by CommunistTaco

Chapter 1: Where am I???!!!!! (v2)

Note: This is not the original version of this chapter. View the original here: http://pastebin.com/GqGhvDhB

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For what seemed like eternity, I was floating in a black void. I heard voices whispering all around me none of which I could actually understand. This was probably the strangest and yet scary moment of my life, if I even was still alive. I then I heard on of the voices say something I recognized. "Wake....... Up.........." It said. And then my whole world turned white.

---

"Ow my head!"

All I could feel was pain. All the way up my body. It felt like I was just kicked in my jewels countless times for an hour on end. I just sat there groaning in agony for what seemed like hours. I assumed this was the after effects of being struck by lightning. Once again my luck with the weather had been so impeccable that lightning decided to strike me instead of the countless buildings, trees, and lampposts around me. Slowly, after several minutes of lying there in agony, the pain slowly started to recede.

I focused mostly on my breathing to avoid either hyperventilating or cease breathing all together. In through the nose, out through the mouth. My breaths were raspy and restricted but I was able to focus enough to keep breathing at a steady pace.

Eventually I upped the courage to open my eyes. I expected to be in the hospital or something but what I saw was almost pitch blackness. Once my vision adapted to the darkness I made out that I was in a dark forest at night. My vision was partially obscured by a weird blue object appearing to jut out from my face.

"How the hell did I end up here?!!" I exclaimed.

I was absolutely dumbfounded. Colorado had extensive sections of wooded areas especially in the mountains but those were mostly pine forests. What I saw before me much more resembled something you would find in the south-east United States. It was humid too, very humid like a rainforest. 'Well I ain't in Kansas no more' I though to myself mentally chuckling at the stupid reference I had made.

Even in near-death experiences I managed to find my horrible sense of humor. Probably due to all that garbage TV I watched. Speaking of TV, the colors here seemed to be much more vibrant, similar to those of a cartoon. 'Well either someone stuck me in some hologram animated by Disney or that lightning really did a number on my eyes'

The last thing I remember was getting struck on the way home from work. 'I should be dead' I thought to myself. 'Am I dead? Is this the afterlife or some shit??!!! Wait no. I felt pain, this has to be real. I should probably find some shelter or someth....'

My rambling thoughts stopped when my eyes caught something peculiar. Right below and the right of me was what looked like a weird blue limb of some sort. I tried to move my arm to find the source of said limb only to find it to be my limb. "WHAT THE HELL!!!!" I yelled as I flailed around like I was having a seizure.

Not only was I in a world that looked like Walt Disney got high and started animating cartoons but my arm was now blue and fuzzy. "WHAT KIND OF CRAZY SCIENCE EXPERIMENT GONE WRONG IS THIS???!!!!!" I demanded not receiving an answer. I also noticed under closer examination that my hands were gone. I just couldn't wrap my brain around it and it was freaking me out.

Once I managed to collect myself I attempted to figure out why my limb was blue and furry. Upon closer examination I determined I had a hoof like a horse. "Why the fuck am I a horse?" I asked to no-one in particular.

So my only explanations at this point was someone genetically mutated me or I was on some serious LSD. I was hoping for my sake, that it was the latter.

I took the time to examine the rest of my body only to find another unbelievable surprise. "I have wings???!!! God this day keeps getting stranger by the minute," I stated.

The wings were strange to say the least. Not only could I now feel the presence of an extra set of limbs on my back but they seemed way too short to even be able to sustain flight. So either my body was like 95% air or I was a flightless bird... or horse in this case.

I attempted to move said wings only to be met with them twitching ever so slightly. "Well I guess I ain't flying around any time soon," I said.

"So I'm a horse with wings so that makes me a pegasus right?" I asked into the dark abyss of the forest.

"Jeez either I was drugged big time in the hospital or I'm absolutely going insane," I muttered to myself.

"Blyad'! (Fuck!)" I swore in Russian.

I attempted to get up without accounting that I was now a quadruped. "Mphhh" I managed to squeak out as I topped over right onto my face... no cross that out... my muzzle which I had figured out was the object jutting from my face earlier.

"Owww, fuck," I complained.

I tried standing up again with the acquired knowledge of being a quadruped instead of a biped and managed to get to my feet..no..hooves. It was just a task trying to stay up so I had no idea how I would figure out walking. I tried to take one step at a time but kept smacking my snout into the earth. 'This has to be easier than I'm making it look!' I mentally sighed.

I tried to remember how my dog, Xander, from back in North Carolina used to walk. I was able to slowly copy his movements from my vague memory. Eventually I was taking baby steps for the second time in my life. 'Wow never though I'd have to relearn how to walk,' I laughed.

After around a hour, give or take, I was able to walk around with a steady pace despite the occasional slip up. I felt confident enough to at least move on to my next course of action. At that point, I was conflicted. I could either A: Try to find civilization and risk being taken and tested on the government for being a talking, blue pegasus, or B: find a cave or overhang and hunker down for the night.

"Well I better find some sort of shelter before I get attacked by some other mythological creature," I muttered.

As if on cue, I heard a growl of sorts behind me. I spun around to see what appeared to be a wolf made of... sticks...? growling at me. Assuming the worst, I attempted to distract the wooden wolf by kicking a rock in its direction. The trick seemed to work and I sprinted off as fast as my poor motor skills could take me. The wolf attempted to pursue but eventually gave up either finding some much easier to catch pray or determining that I was a waste of its time.

With a sigh of relief I slowed my awkward run to a brisk walk. Walking along through the foliage, I managed to find a small cave embedded into a cliff. "Good of a spot as any," I said as I crawled into the cramped cave.

Sleep came easy due to the chaotic events of my day. As I slowly drifted out of consciousness I could only wonder 'Where am I?' and 'Why am I here?'

Finally sleep overtook me and I drifted off into the cozy embrace of my dreams.

---

Morning came and sunlight peeked in through the cave opening. I opened my eyes and looked around. Confirming that I was still a blue pegasus in a creepy forest I slowly stood up and stretched. My stomach interrupted me with a loud growl. "Crap I better find some berries or something otherwise I'm gonna starve."

Walking around the vicinity of the cave I came across a small vine that seemed to be growing raspberries of some sort. I picked one up and popped it in my mouth. "Yep definitely raspberries," I confirmed.

It then dawned on me that I had just picked an object up with a hoof, a seemingly impossible feat considering hooves were essentially a round hard bit of keratin with a softer fleshy frog in the center. Not exactly built for grasping anything. While the hooves I now possessed seemed a lot softer and less defined than the ones on a horse, they still lacked any digits to grasp things with.

After some trial and error with the raspberries and few sticks and rocks lying around, I figured out that items pretty much glued themselves to the surface of my hoof if I imagined grabbing them. If I thought too hard about it, or imagined letting go, they would simply fall to the forest floor. I had no idea how it worked, but who was I to complain. It made the loss of my hands and fingers all that much easier. After my impromptu experiment, I quickly resumed gathering raspberries.

Grabbing as many as I could carry I made my way back to the cave. After a wonderful raspberry breakfast I concluded that my first objective should be to find civilization of some sort. Despite being a talking blue pegasus I still think that finding some sort of town or farm would be the best idea at this juncture.

Setting off in a random direction I walked for seemingly hours until I came upon a small stream. Taking a drink to quench my thirst I stared at my reflection in the water. My coat was more of a teal color rather than the blue I originally thought. My mane was crimson with black streaks through it. My eyes were the same crimson as my mane and they were way larger than they should be. My tail was short and spiky and was the same colors as my mane.

For a pony-horse-pegasus thing I thought I looked pretty bad-ass. After fully taking in my reflection and another long sip of water, I continued along. Finally, after what seemed like hours I noticed the forest was beginning to thin out. And for the first time in a day and a half I broke free of that creepy forest. I was in some sort of meadow overlooking what looked like a small village of some sorts.

'Oh thank fucking god!' I mentally exclaimed, 'Maybe I can finally get some answers!'

The town itself looked like a weird mix of the Middle Ages and the late Industrial Era. The homes had a very 'Medieval' look to them and appeared slightly out of proportion. At the same time I could see what appeared to be electric lighting and in the distance a train station. 'Either the architects here are trying to go for a retro look or this place is way far behind in terms of architecture at least.'

Just as I was about to go investigate I heard some voices near-by. Instinctively I dove into a nearby bush and waited. As the voices approached I was able to make out a conversation of some sorts.

"...and that's why the princess wants us to investigate," I heard a feminine voice say.

I peeked out of the bushes to see six pony-like creatures that seemed to be the same as me. The one thing that caught my eye was that the one leading the front was a purple pony with what looked like a horn protruding from its head. 'A fucking unicorn? What is this, magical pony land?' I mentally exclaimed.

"Ah still don't know why the princess wants us to investigate this magical anomaly thing. Ah would assume that it was just the Everfree Forest being its normally unpredictable self." I heard a southern accented orange pony who seemed to not have wings or a horn.

'So there's pegasi, unicorns, and regular ponies? And they were talking about magic of some sort too. Great it's like the world's biggest acid trip.'

The group walked past the bushes where I was hidden chatting about magic and a princess of some sort. There were four others besides the two I previously described.

One was a sky-blue pegasus with a rainbow mane and tail. I think I heard one of her friends call her Rainbow Dash. 'What I fitting name' I though smugly to myself.

Another one was a pure white unicorn with a obviously over-styled purple man and an almost English accent. She seemed to have the stuffy attitude that was often associated with the wealthy. I just hoped she wasn't a snob like a lot of rich folks. I had a great dislike for rich snobs having worked on their houses all the time at my job.

Next was a pink regular pony with a poofy magenta mane and tail. She seemed like she had way to much sugar because she was bouncing around (don't ask me how) and talking a million words a minute. A never ending pink ball of energy is most likely the best description.

Trailing slightly behind the group a tad was a light-yellow pegasus with a light-pink mane and tail. She seemed a bit timid from what I could she because when she did speak, it was almost unnoticeable her voice was so quiet. Her friends didn't seem to really pay her much attention unless she actually voiced her opinion, which I saw happen only once.

The orange southern-accented regular pony from earlier had a blond mane and tail as well as a stetson adorned on her head. She seemed like your stereotypical southern farmer. I wouldn't be surprised if she grew cotton or tobacco.

The purple unicorn who seemed to be leading the group had a purple mane and tail with pink streaks running through them. She seemed to be the nerd of the group because she kept rambling on about books and science and what-not. If I was any younger I would of admired her intellectual appearance but about a year ago I realized book smarts get you nowhere in life hence my job, house, and livelihood. I studied hard all my life only to be rewarded with nothing but shit.

I also noticed that each pony had some sort of tattoo on their behinds. 'Some kind of ritual or something' I concluded.

As the group walked away from me towards the edge of the forest I decided to quietly follow at a safe distance. 'I know I'm going to end up regretting this later but I need answers and these six seem to know something' I mused to myself.

Oh what a day this was turning out to be...

Author's Note:

Just to avoid confusion, words outlined in "quotes" are when a character is speaking and words that are italic and outlined in apostrophes are the character thinking to themselves.
Hope you all are enjoying the story so far!

-CommunistTaco

Comments

[222leslie222]

Why did you tern him in to a poney !?

[jaybird]

i dont know why but HIES and especially when they turn into pony's are the best story's two me with the exceptions that are just horrible
i will watch this

[CommunistTaco]

4037809 I'll go ahead and change that. Thanks for the heads up

[CommunistTaco]

4037978 I feel that it gives that character a bit more of a inner struggle which I am trying to shoot for. I also find it hilarious when a character is changed physically one way or another. It adds for a bit of drama in the first few chapters at least.

[ferret]

The black somewhat rescues the awful dark red on blue coloring. Still, red and black is an infamous combination that reminds people of many many (gasp) many terrible OCs. I could see a yellow instead of a red, or maybe an orange...

[IkioStar]

I'm going to try to pretend that I didn't see half a chapter full of errors lying on a fulcrum of awkward character traits, sentences and exposition...and try to get through this story without passing a kidney stone through my eyes. I can already feel my mouth foaming...

Oh...before I forget the really big tip... 'Could have'. Not 'Could of'. There's a difference between an accent and being wrong. If you want to go the middle ground 'could've' would work fine, as it is a contraction.

[damnaion]

i hate to say this but this is a better chapter that you should've used as your first one for this a part from that good work

[mapu]

That google translate swearing lol.
So far decent story, could be better, or more original. Nice pacing tho.
4037809 No please don't. I hate italics.

[Profesionalac]

Is it bad if I listen to red army is the strongest and wrote don how to saw fuck in russian

[BurningSkies]

7462949
Same comrade!