Chapter 2: Prison Etiquette
Marwolaeth grinned beneath his helmet. A monster had attacked the nearby town not half a day after his arrival? And he had been told that this was a peaceful place.
This manticore that had been unfortunate enough to appear while within eyeshot of the town was large, at least as large as the average bear. It was a deep golden-tan with a long, limp red tail that ended in a scorpion stinger, and small bat-like wings. Long, wickedly sharp claws dug into the earth as it sloppily pivoted towards the approaching sound of shifting metal. Foam dripped from its fangs as it regarded this shiny new toy with an empty look in its eyes.
The manticore leaped to embrace its new toy as he pulled a long spear from his back. Marwolaeth ducked under the airborne monster as he gave his spear an expert flick and twirl. There was a small spray of red as the manticore roared in pain and Marwolaeth cursed under his breath.
“I’m getting rusty with this spear.” He muttered to himself as he spun to face the manticore as it landed. Its hind legs were bleeding from shallow cuts along their backs, the result of a shoddily executed and subsequently failed attack on its hamstrings.
The manticore roared in fury. Marwolaeth could read its thought process in its movements and eyes. How dare my new toy have the gall to turn on me, it said.
Marwolaeth spun his spear around his body, reacquainting himself with its weight. The flashes of light as the spear caught the sun’s rays mesmerized the manticore, who began circling this traitorous toy, scorpion tail held low and relaxed.
Marwolaeth seemed to make a decision and hefted his spear before rearing it back and throwing it at the manticore. The animal watched dumbly as the shaft of sparkling metal arced through the air until it pierced the stinger of its tail, pinning it to the ground.
Marwolaeth cursed once more, his throw having been off by a scant foot. “At least I still hit it.” He said to himself. He pulled out one of his longer swords and unsheathed an ornate dagger. He paused as the manticore roared again, this time in rage as it turned on its tail and began tearing at it with its teeth.
Finally, the poison sack burst under the manticore’s teeth, leaking a viscous green liquid over its lower jaw. One final twist of its head tore the stinger from its tail, leaving the manticore with a truncated stub. The manticore once more turned to Marwolaeth and began stalking forward, only to twitch and fall onto the ground.
The manticore arose and staggered to the side before fixing its gaze on Marwolaeth. It took a shaky step forward before collapsing. Its gaze never left the man’s eyes.
Save me toy, the gaze spoke, as the manticore began to spasm.
Marwolaeth began slowly walking towards the manticore as it convulsed, sword at his side and dagger back in its sheath.
The sound of hooves approached the scene as Marwolaeth rested the tip of his sword at the manticore’s throat.
“Stop right there!” Somepony shouted. Marwolaeth turned his head to look at the trio of white ponies in golden armour, and two of his charges, Applejack and Fluttershy.
The manticore whimpered as its convulsions weakened to mad twitching. Marwolaeth’s sword rose a scant few inches into the air.
“Marwolaeth…” Fluttershy began. “Don’t…”
The sword flashed downwards, neatly slicing the manticore’s throat.
A spray of blood pattered against Marwolaeth’s boots.
The armoured Ponies glanced at the quickly dying manticore, and then slowly shifted their gaze back to Marwolaeth, eyes hard and cold.
Fluttershy’s eyes were on the manticore as its eyes drained of intelligence.
Applejack could not tear her eyes from the sight of the manticore’s final heartbeats soaking the dirt beneath Marwolaeth with its lifeblood.
“Order me as Pydredd.” Marwolaeth said softly before cleaning the tip of his sword on the manticore’s hide.
“Marwolaeth…” Applejack breathed softly.
“Pydredd, you are under arrest.” One of the white ponies stated.
“Am I? Under what charges?”
“Pydredd… That was a female manticore.” Fluttershy said as she began to tear up. “It- It’s illegal to kill the females.”
“Hm. A shame.”
“Marwolaeth Pydredd.” The white pony stepped forward authoritatively. “You are under arrest for poaching, under the Everfree Conservation Act of 647. Your belongings will be confiscated and you shall be detained in the Canterlot dungeons until trial. As a foreigner, you are entitled to an ambassador of your kind as defense. Your belongings will be returned to you upon release from prison. You have the right to trial and appeal, and the right to remain silent, as anything you say can and will be used against you. Do you wish to declare anything before we begin the search?”
Marwolaeth began to unstrap weapons as he listed them off to what he understood to be a guard pony. As he finished, he looked slightly smaller than before.
“Sir, we are going to search you for hidden weapons, now.”
One of the other guard Ponies stepped forward, this one with a horn. It surrounded itself with a soft blue glow, as the same colour aura developed around Marwolaeth.
“He’s clean.”
“Any requests before incarceration?”
“The armour stays on. If you have prison garb, find a set big enough to fit over the armour.”
The lead guard pony squinted at Marwolaeth. “Very well. Follow us.”
The three guard ponies surrounded Marwolaeth before leading him to the train station. Townsponies gawked at the tall figure as he strode through town. Marwolaeth’s charges slowly joined his entourage, asking for the situation and being told by the guards that Marwolaeth was under arrest. When neither the guards nor Marwolaeth elaborated, Applejack and Fluttershy told their friends the story.
Twilight decided that she could use her leverage as a princess to sway Marwolaeth’s trial in his favour, and so accompanied the guards onto the train. Of course, where she went, her friends went.
The train car was very crowded.
The train ride was awkwardly silent.
When the train pulled into Canterlot station, the lead guard pulled a set of hoofcuffs from a bag.
“Sir, while you have been cooperative so far, protocol demands that you wear these hoofcuffs whilst in the capital.”
The hoofcuffs were a set of four iron hoops connected by chains, clearly meant to hinder quadrapedal movement. However, the hoofs clamped onto Marwolaeth’s wrists were much too big, and slid off easily. They were, instead, clamped to his biceps. This, in turn, meant that the other two hoofcuffs could not reach his ankles, and so were attached to his thighs, which were too big for the cuffs to fully close.
All in all, the hoofcuffs were more of a minor annoyance than a hindrance.
As Marwolaeth and his entourage disembarked and began the trek to Canterlot Castle, the hubbub of a thriving capital subsided as whispers replaced conversations. Some of these whispers were quite loud enough for Marwolaeth to hear.
“Goodness, what is that creature?”
“So intimidating.”
“Such an interesting way to wear hoofcuffs.”
“Look at that armour. No style at all.”
Marwolaeth smirked. Hardly the most vitriolic race, these ponies.
As the group reached Canterlot Castle, the common ponies split from the guard ponies. Marwolaeth was led downwards, the building material giving way from marble to cobblestone and, eventually, smoothly carved cave walls. He was led to what could only loosely be described as a jail cell.
“…What is this?” Marwolaeth asked the lead guard.
“A jail cell. Obviously.”
“…No.”
“Excuse me?”
“Wait here one moment.”
Marwolaeth stalked into the lavish room in front of him. The walls of the cell were covered in lavender wallpaper with flowing designs on it. The bed was a fluffy mattress with pink sheets. The ground was layered with shag carpets and the wall had a small fountain that spilled into a divot that ran across the room and under a plush seat over a hole in the ground that the water fell into. Light seemed to emanate from a bulbous plant hung from the roof that gave the room an interesting floral smell. The only indication that this room was, in fact, a jail cell was the barred door set into one wall. He stuck his head out of the doorway.
“How much property destruction is required before I am convicted of willful destruction of property?”
“More than can be done from a jail cell.”
“Wonderful.”
Marwolaeth cracked his knuckles before going to work.
The mattress went out the door, thumping into one of the guards who sputtered indignantly, leaving only a wooden frame. The plush seat had a leg removed before being tossed to join its cousin, the mattress, outside. The leg was jammed into the fountain, stoppering the flow of water to a trickle, but not before using the jagged edge to jab a hole in the ceiling plant. Marwolaeth then took the hanging pot and gave it a spin, sending the luminescent sap splattering about the room. When the plant was drained, Marwolaeth removed it from the pot and dropped it down the toilet hole.
Finally, Marwolaeth ripped the wallpaper and carpet from their anchors and tossed them out the door, leaving him in a dark, stone cell with softly glowing walls, a hard wooden cot, and the incessant noise of dripping water as the scent of decaying plant began to seep from the toilet.
Marwolaeth beckoned the guards to enter. “This, gentlemen, is a jail cell.”
The guards gawked at the destruction wrought upon their pristine décor. “This- These are simply barbaric conditions to live in!” One of them yelped.
“Exactly. Would deter a lot of crime, knowing that this is what awaited them. You know; if I was feeling especially gloomy, I’d start punching the walls and floor, make them look roughly hewn. If I got lucky, they’d be a menace to touch.”
The lead guard chuckled nervously. “I don’t know what good it would do. These walls are enchanted to resist force and spells alike.”
Marwolaeth raised an eyebrow beneath his helmet. “Is that a challenge?”
The stallion began to sweat. “Uh, no. No. I’d rather not take my chances, after watching you toss that mattress.”
“Smart man.”
“Um, dinner will arrive shortly. What do you eat?”
“Meat.”
The stallion gulped. “Uh, I think we might be able to requisition some of the supplies reserved for the griffon ambassadors.”
“Don’t bother. Bring me mouldy bread and dirty water.”
“Are- Are you serious?”
“If I am to be imprisoned, I demand to be treated as a prisoner should be treated. Half a loaf of mouldy bread and a small cup of dirty water.”
“I- I’m not sure that I can condone that kind of diet.”
“Bring me nothing then.”
“I’ll bring down some-” The armoured pony gagged. “Griffin cuisine for you shortly.”
“Don’t bother.”
“…Right.”
All three guards, heavily shaken by their experience, left the jail cell and shut the door, locking it behind them, before trotting towards the exit.
“Hey! Where do you think you’re going?” Marwolaeth called to the retreating guards.
“Back to our barracks?” One responded.
“Leaving the prisoner unguarded? What kind of farce is this?” Marwolaeth yelled.
The white ponies dropped any pretense of control and hastened to the exit, Marwolaeth insulting their regiment and instructors as they ran.
An hour later, a guard approached the dungeons with a covered platter. Marwolaeth could not tell due to his similarity to every other guard he had seen, but he suspected that this one was the same stallion that had arrested him.
The stallion entered a theatre of carnage. Or, at least, carnage in his eyes. Almost every cell’s door had been opened, and had been evicted of its furniture, which was piled neatly next to the open door. Marwolaeth had been gingerly setting the bed of one cell into the floor as the stallion had entered.
“What… What happened here?”
The guard looked to the cell that Marwolaeth had been interred in. The door was warped outwards, its deadbolt snapped.
“A lesson in prison etiquette.” Marwolaeth responded, sounding winded.
“I- We- Why?”
“This?” Marwolaeth gestured to the broken cell door. “This is what happens when you leave prisoners with no guards. Especially when you don’t know what they are capable of. This.” He gestured to the piles of neatly stacked amenities. “This is a basic remodel. I figured that the bureaucracy to remodel your prison cells would make this take far too long, so I decided to lend a helping hand.” He walked back to his cell. “You’re welcome.”
“I- I-”
Marwolaeth gripped the bent door bars and gave a mighty tug. The cell door realigned itself, knocking the broken halves of the deadbolt clanging to the floor.
“I brought you some food.” The guard began hyperventilating.
“I saw that. What’s the gruel for today?”
“A- A grilled steak.” The guard’s lips began twitching, as he seemed to hold in a retch. “With baked potatoes and- And a spinach salad with garlic croutons. And warm milk. And a small flan for dessert.”
“What, no mouldy bread? Bah, haven’t you all been listening to a word I’ve said? I’ll do without.” Marwolaeth turned his back to the guard before sliding down the wall with the screech of metal on stone.
The guard’s left eye twitched halfway shut with a nigh audible shattering sound.
“You know what? You know what?! NO!”
The guard threw the cell door open and stomped inside. Even though he couldn’t see Marwolaeth’s eyes, he could almost feel his apathetic stare.
“You’re a prisoner! You don’t get to make demands! You’re going to eat this lovingly crafted meal, and you’re going to like it!” The guard slammed the platter to the ground between Marwolaeth’s legs and glared at him, daring him to object.
Marwolaeth stared at the guard with half-lidded eyes as the stallion stood with his nose to the faceplate, breathing heavily.
Marwolaeth chuckled. “Yes, sir.” He said, in a tone that was mocking the perceived seriousness of the situation.
“Good. Good.” The guard backed up a step and took a deep breath. “I’ll… I’ll be right outside. Fixing the rooms, or something. Yell if you need- Ah, Tartarus I won’t care if you yell something. I’m gonna play some card games.”
The cell door slammed shut behind the guard. When Marwolaeth was sure that he would not be watched, he removed his helmet and began eating.
He had to admit that this was one of the finer meals that he had eaten.
Marwolaeth strapped his helmet back on and went to the cell door. He raised a hand to knock on the bars, but recalled that the door was unlocked and would swing open if pushed, so instead he knocked on the doorframe.
Contrary to his outburst, the harried guard poked his head out from the room he had been fixing. “What?! What could you possibly want now?!” He yelled as his voice cracked.
“I’d just like to compliment the chef. It was an excellently cooked meal, and definitely the best prison fare that I’ve had the pleasure to experience.”
“I- You mean it?”
Marwolaeth chuckled. “Those of my position cannot tell a lie. Ask Twilight Sparkle if you don’t believe me.”
“Wow. Thank you, I’ll give your compliments to the chef.”
“Please do.”
Marwolaeth and the guard pricked their ears as a set of hoofsteps approached the dungeons. The guard snapped to attention as a grey Pony with a silver mane bedecked with a set of functional looking plate barding entered the room.
“I heard a commotion.” He said in a soft, worn voice that carried authority. “What’s happened in here?”
“Captain Shield Line, sir! The… The prisoner was giving me pointers on proper prison etiquette, sir!” The guard answered in the terse, near yell of a subordinate answering his commanding officer.
“Prison etiquette, eh? And the emptied cells?”
“Again, sir, the prisoner demonstrated his people’s system of cell decoration, sir.”
“I see. I expect a full report on the insights of imprisonment that he has explained by the end of the day, Mess Hall. Dismissed.”
Shield Line turned to leave, but Mess Hall hesitated. The captain raised an eyebrow at the guard.
“Sir, with all due respect, one of the things that I was taught that is immediately relevant is that the prisoner is not to be left unguarded, sir.”
“Very well. I shall watch him. Return to your duties in Ponyville.”
“Sir, yes sir!” Mess Hall saluted before marching away from the dungeons.
Shield Line turned when he heard the clack of metal being set on the floor. Marwolaeth slid the platter that had contained his food under the cell door. The man was sitting leaned against the wall next to the broken door, watching the guard captain.
“So, I’m to understand that you were unsatisfied with Equestria’s prison?” Shield Line asked, approaching Marwolaeth.
“That I was.”
“Might I ask why?”
“It was much too comfortable. Prison is meant to deter its inhabitants from returning to crime when they are released. When they have a comfortable bed, calming surroundings and good food at their beck and call, prison begins to seem like a reward, rather than a punishment.”
“I see. I’m to understand, then, that Mess Hall will be giving me a list of changes to make to the prison cells at the end of the day?”
“Perhaps, if he listened to all that I had to say.”
“Hmm. Perhaps you can give me a summary.”
Marwolaeth began to tick off his fingers as he listed changes to Equestria’s prisons. “Small, dark, damp, smelly, uncomfortable cells, constant guards, and awful food.”
Shield Line nodded. “Very well. I will take your… counsel under consideration.”
“Do as you please. I doubt that you’ll implement them.”
Shield Line cocked his eyebrow again. “Oh? And how do you know that?”
“You are a guard captain, trained in the classic manner of your predecessors, being advised by lowly criminal scum. My words and actions won’t change decades of consistency.”
“Heh. Smart monkey. At least take solace in the fact that your advice will be upheld for your stay in the Canterlot dungeons.”
A few minutes passed before Marwolaeth looked up. “Captain Line, I would demand that one piece of my advice be followed.”
“Oh?”
Marwolaeth nudged his cell door and it creaked open. “You should get this door outfitted with a new lock.”
“Mm. Noted.”
Silence passed for a few moments.
“Aren’t you going to move me to a cell that actually has a lock?”
“No need. You aren’t going anywhere.”
“Perhaps not, but it is terribly unsafe.”
Another few minutes were spent in silence before Shield Line took a breath.
“Tell me your name, prisoner.”
“I’d have thought that Twilight Sparkle or Celestia would have told it to you by now.”
“And they have. But I want to hear you say it for yourself.”
“Hm. My name is Marwolaeth Pydredd.”
“Mean anything in particular?”
“Yes.”
“…Care to share?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“It translates into a language you wouldn’t understand from a land far away from this one.”
“I see. The reason I ask is, for a creature of intelligence, you seem intent on causing as much ruckus as you can.”
Marwolaeth shrugged. “If it gets results, I will do it.”
“What, may I ask, would result from a reform of the dungeons?”
“Less crime.”
“As far as I can tell, you will not be here for long. Why do you care?”
“My assignment is to keep my charges safe at all times. Since I cannot physically protect them at this time, I am simply attempting to make their lives that small bit safer by reducing the appeal of crime.”
“Oddly focused on that job of yours.”
“It is literally my only reason for being here.”
“Hmph.”
“And you?”
“Excuse me?”
“I gave you my name. Terribly impolite not to tell me yours.”
“I would have thought that you could overhear Mess Hall saying it.”
“And I did. But I’d rather hear it from your own tongue.”
“Hmph. Shield Line.”
“Well, no point in asking what that is. Any particular reason for taking that name?”
“It is a simple, yet surprisingly difficult style of troop command. I specialize in the organization, deployment and command of soldiers and squads.”
“Hm. A respectable talent.”
“Not in today’s day and age.”
“No?”
“No. The last great war was hundreds of years ago, and the biggest conflict of recent times was an invasion that lasted less than an hour.”
“Yes, I had been told that this was a peaceful place.”
“Mmh. We still have our problems. Slight crime, monster incursions, tense political situations. Nothing that requires a stallion of my talents.”
“Makes me wonder why I was requested here.”
“I wonder the same. Perhaps Princess Celestia has grown paranoid for her young apprentice.”
“Perhaps. …When am I to be tried?”
“Tomorrow afternoon. It is nearly nightfall now.”
“We have time, then. Perhaps you could tell me about this short invasion?”
“Hm, I could give you a summary. I wasn’t the guard captain at the time, a stallion named Shining Armor was. Good stallion, always had a head for defensive strategies, and he could cast the best shields I’d ever seen. Problem was, he got cocky, figured nopony could breach Canterlot in a war of attrition, so he didn’t have any offensive or aggressive plans.”
“In a time of peace, not a problem.”
“No, but the problem came when an anonymous tip that an army was approaching Canterlot. Shining Armor managed to keep a shield spell surrounding the entirety of the city.”
Marwolaeth gave an impressed whistle.
“Indeed. Unfortunately, this threat came to us while Shining Armor was preparing to marry Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, who he had met as a teenager as she foalsat his sister, a young Twilight Sparkle before she became the figure she is today.”
“Do I smell nepotism in this Shining Armor’s promotions?”
“No. His rise through the ranks of the guard came before he officially began courting Princess Cadance. That shield spell alone was enough to get him to a commanding position. Unbeknownst to Shining Armor and the rest of the royal family, Princess Cadance had, at some point, been replaced by a changeling queen known as Chrysalis. Now the changelings, as you probably are unaware, are a race of shape changing Ponies that feed on emotions, primarily love and lust. Queen Chrysalis had assumed that she could conquer Equestria and keep its citizens captured in cocoons that would siphon their emotions. However, she became cocky when her plan neared fruition, revealing herself and becoming sloppy in how she dealt with her most dangerous enemies.
“Eventually, Shining Armor’s shield shattered due to his weakness after days of being drained of emotion. changelings stormed the streets of Canterlot. The guards had been posted in odd places, at Queen Chrysalis’s suggestion, and the changelings knew where they were. If not for the return of the real Princess Cadance and her love for her fiancé, Canterlot would have fallen that day.”
“Wait. Cadenza saved the day with love?”
“Oh yes. You know what they say: Too much of a good thing becomes a bad thing. Such was the case with the changelings. When Princess Cadance returned and reminded Shining Armor of his love for her, she supercharged his shield spell with her emotion magic. The shield expanded across Canterlot, pushing the changelings out, back to their homeland. Every changeling returned home battered, bruised, humiliated, and full of love.”
“I see. Have steps been taken to prevent another changeling incursion?”
“Yes. Princess Celestia has opened peace talks with Queen Chrysalis, and has given all of the Unicorn guardsponies a changeling detecting spell.”
“Hmph. A peaceful land where the problems are solved via the magic of love.”
“Heh. When you phrase it like that, it almost sounds childish.”
“Mm.”
Minutes passed as Marwolaeth mulled over this story, before his mind hitched on a small detail.
“Shield Line.”
“Mm?”
“If this Shining Armor was such a good captain, where is he now?”
“Ah, that’s another story. He married Princess Cadance, the real one. Soon after, an old city was rediscovered after having been lost in the frozen wastes of the North. Princess Cadance is the daughter of that city’s last princess, you see, and so was the rightful ruler of the land. The problem with allowing her to rule was that, even for an alicorn, she was very young at the time that the city disappeared a thousand years ago.
“Celestia took Cadance in and taught her the duties of a princess as she grew older, and sent her to reclaim her throne when the Crystal City reappeared. However, the corrupt spirit of the emperor that dethroned Cadance’s mother returned along with the city. The Elements of Harmony, that group of Ponies that you are supposed to be protecting, helped repel Emperor Sombra, and Spike struck the final blow of his defeat. After some celebration and ceremony, Princess Cadance was crowned the Crystal Empire’s new princess, and Shining Armor retired to live as Princess Cadance’s husband. I, as Shining Armor’s lieutenant, was promoted to guard captain.”
“Huh. And this Crystal Empire…”
“Consists of one city surrounded by blizzards and mountains. It used to be the seat of power for an ancient civilization that crumbled when the capital disappeared.”
“Shouldn’t it be called the Crystal City, then?”
“Eh, Crystal Empire rolls off of the tongue easier.”
“I see.”
The pair lapsed into silence once more until Marwolaeth sighed and cracked his knuckles.
“Only seems fair to me that I start telling you my stories.”
“I have a feeling that your stories contain much more bloodshed than mine.”
“You’d be right, there.”
“You know, not many Ponies have the stomach for blood and fighting.”
“Are you one of those that do?”
“I just might be.”
“Are you going to get tired soon?”
“Hardly. I manage the day and night guard rotations.”
“Excellent.” Marwolaeth chuckled. “I’ve got energy to spare myself. How about I make you a deal?”
“Depends on what you want.”
“I’ll tell you my stories if you keep telling me of Equestria’s battles.”
“Sounds fair to me.”
Shield Line and Marwolaeth spent the night regaling each other with past exploits, from Marwolaeth’s battles against monsters to Equestria’s oldest conflicts with the griffins.
While Shield Line had been retelling the tale of Nightmare Moon to Marwolaeth, the man had begun thinking. When the recounting finished, Marwolaeth asked his question.
“How many princesses does Equestria have, exactly?”
Shield Line rubbed his chin, light bags beginning to develop under his eyes. “Hmm, that’s a good question. You’d get different answers depending on who you ask.”
“Do tell.”
“Cults and fanatics will tell you one: Either Princess Celestia, or Nightmare Moon. The nobles will give a varying answer as they believe themselves to be direct descendants of the royal Alicorn family, and thus view all of their mares as princesses. The farmers will tell you two: Princesses Celestia and Luna. The common folk will tell you four: Princesses Celestia, Luna, Cadance, and Twilight. If the common folk are feeling especially cheeky, they may say five, adding Discord to the roster, or more accurately, his female persona, Eris.”
“Suppose there’s a few secret Alicorns hiding in the shadows?”
“It’s a possibility.”
Eventually, near dawn, a new guard came to find Shield Line, as he had work to do. This new guard was saddled with the responsibility of watching Marwolaeth, who fell asleep soon after Shield Line’s departure.
Eventually, a contingent of guards roused Marwolaeth from his slumber and led him to the antechamber of Canterlot Castle where he was to await his trial. When he was not admitted immediately, Marwolaeth began to talk to the leader of this set of guards.
“So what can I expect of this trial?”
The white stallion eyed Marwolaeth carefully. “Evidence will be examined, eyewitnesses will be questioned, and a verdict will be passed on whether you will be pardoned, or kept for further punishment.”
“I see. And what would warrant a pardon?”
“If the eyewitnesses and evidence agree that you did not kill a protected creature, or if you did, that the kill was out of necessity or pity, then you will be handed a minor stipulation of some sort and sent on your way. If you are found guilty of needlessly harming and killing a protected animal, you will be given a short time in jail, and a guard to monitor you when you are released to prevent further infractions.”
“Hmm. Might plead guilty then, if only to gather myself the company of another guard.”
The guard looked askance at Marwolaeth. “Why on Equestria would you want that?”
“Better to have a local guard mandated to my side to help me protect my charges. I guard versed in the law and lore of the land would be of great use to me.”
“So hire a guard, then. We have loanable troops, no need to be convicted of a crime to get one of us.”
“I’m a loaned soldier myself. It would be terribly bad form if I were to hire my own help. Besides, I have none of your money, and no intention to work myself overly hard to get any.”
“Well, I’ll relay your wish for a guard companion to the judge. Maybe she’ll order a guard to assist you as your inconvenient stipulation should you be proved innocent.”
“Pydredd!” A voice shouted from down the hall.
Marwolaeth turned to see six of his seven charges trotting down the hall.
Twilight Sparkle smiled at him sadly. “I’ve made some beneficial arrangements for this trial. As you are the sole member of your species here, I have elected to take the position of your defense instead, as I can come the closest to approximating your reactions. Further, I have raised your case directly to Princess Celestia’s court.
Marwolaeth felt a grin creep across his face. An awful, mischievous grin that would have made Discord proud. “Actually Sparkle.” He said, carefully hiding the mirth from his voice. “If we are to find my defense based on who can judge my reactions the best, I would consult with Captain Shield Line.”
Twilight Sparkle’s jaw dropped. “Wh- What?”
“Shield Line and I had quite the long night swapping stories. If there is anypony that would know my thoughts behind my actions, it would be him.” Marwolaeth turned to the lead guardspony. “If you would kindly find Captain Shield Line and ask if he has the time to act as my defense, we would be most appreciative.”
The guard nodded and ordered a less important pony to fetch Shield Line.
After a minute of uncomfortable silence on the part of the Elements of Harmony, and internal scheming on the part of Marwolaeth, the doors to the throne room slowly creaked open, and Shield Line stepped through the door.
“Princess Celestia will see you now, Marwolaeth Pydredd.”
Marwolaeth felt his smirk return. “Delightful.”
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A manticore... how original. That said, you actually managed to put an original twist in the execution, so... well done.
EAYENAEYAENg,ILLEGAL TO KILL FEMALE MONEYCORES
mmmmm pydredd must be ancient if hes this amazingly educated and cunning to be able to adapt to a new world almost immediately.
ANOTHER!
*smashes cup*
MOREMOREMOREMOREMOREMOREMOREMOREMORE
...Sorry.
This story is FANTASTIC so far. Pydredd is a clever character who keeps me smiling. I can't WAIT to see what he has planned. Keep it coming!
I like Shield Line... do love the story and how it unfolds. Especially the Prison etiquette.
had to do it....
i.imgur.com/oVnE99k.jpg
the part was so funny
3705361
*Smashes vase* What are we smashing next?
3705284
He is. I forget where it was stated, and I'm too lazy to go look for it right now, but he is apparently very old and has a lot of experience on more than a few different planes of existence. And having a completely one-track mind helps since it essentially forces him to remain focused and calm.
3677625 If you're interested in finding a picture of actual armor (and not concept art), do a google search for "Maximilian armor" and "fluted armor." That will get you pictures of the real life armor that Dark Souls and Demon's Souls bases their Knight, Elite Knight, and Fluted armor sets on.
3706284 *Smashes Xbox One* Ohhhhh... how about an ipad?
3707706 While I appreciate the tip, I was looking for concept art. The only pictures of actual armour (withing the first few pages of Google) are empty sets of armour that are, quite frankly, not as impressive as Dark Souls armour sets. Still, I appreciate the sentiment.
this is starting have more comedy elements
please add the comedy tag
man im not gonna lie when i saw mature,sex,gore i thought ehh but now its getting good
Fuck yeah I love this Story
for the 9 people who voted down this story
how can you not like things like
Pydredd is just an EPIC OC, on of few that i can count on one hand that isn't a pony, dragon, ect'... we don't even know what he is, how cool is that?
3707715
*Smashes every iDevice in 10 mile radius* Done.
So, this the second best written OC I've ever read, and one of the best human ones. Yes. More.
More.
More needs to be had. if you do not supply the masses with the sustenance known as MOAR, then there will be consequences.
You have been warned.
Oh, I am lovin' the shit outta this story. Just makes you wanna roll around on it drunkenly, don't it?.
This is great, main character is awesome. This shield Line is another awesome guy. And if a guard does follow Marwolaeth Pydredd around I hope its Mess Hall. Which I thinks his name =)
Great story. He reminds me of artorias the abysswalker from dark souls b4 he went evil all he needs is a huge pet
Keep it up man. It's been a while since I read a story that kept me up past sleepy time.
I just cannot say Marwolaeth without it sounding like a sassy Marvelous. XD
It appears Celestia used Dwarf Fortress as her template for jail-cells.
Great prisoner, awesome character.
Why did I have Bane's voice go through my head for Pyrdredd
4323654 I keep having a vaguely british-accented voice when I read knights of any kind... maybe it's because that's where the theme of knights originated.
3712295 who's the first ????
Lol Pydredd is such a smart @$$ xD I don't like how he smirks and messes with everyone so much (espescially since he's supposed to be this super serious knight that takes no sh*t and is only focused on the mission) but it's understandable; guys gotta have his own fun and all. Plus, gives him some depth and makes him more likeable/appeals to the audience, like plenty of other trouble making, smart alecks, examples being Discord primarily and even Loki.
I also LOVE Equestrian jail, it's so like them xD Hey, Jackobol, I've been a BAAAAD boy, can you perhaps throw me in Pony Jail too? Say, perhaps for life? I MEAN I STOLE A BALLOON ON FREE BALLOON DAY AFTER ALL!
And I love how he dealt with the manticore....No mercy xD P.S. Saw a comment by a guy named RoadRunneR mentioning the execution and I guess you could say that manticore scene was...-Puts on shades- EXECUTED nicely! ZING! -Air Horns-