Extremely Loud, Intensely Bright, Drastically Tense, Exceedingly Tight

by h4ns

Out of Milk

Chapter 40: Out of Milk

Bryce sat at the breakfast table eating his usual breakfast of two fried egg sandwiches. Apple Bloom sat opposite him with her head resting on her hooves. For whatever reason the yellow filly was taking a big interest in his breakfast, and the staring was beginning to make Bryce anxious.

After eating off the crusts from his first sandwich, Bryce finally asked, "Uhh... Sprout... Why are you... looking at me?"

Ignoring his question, Apple Bloom asked, "Why do yuh always have the same thing for breakfast?"

"Why do you want to know?"

"Ah don't know; it's somethin Ah've noticed."

"Well, it's something I like to have."

"That much?"

"Yeah."

Before Bryce could even get in his first bite, Apple Bloom interrupted. "Why do yuh like eggs so much?"

Bryce lowered the sandwich. "Well it's just something I like to have. If anything it's the best source of protein I'm going to get in this world."

"Oh."

Bryce was halfway done with his first sandwich when Apple Bloom again interrupted him. "What's protein?"

"Well, it's an essential nutrient every living things needs to survive. Some foods that have it are eggs, beans, nuts, seeds, and me... me... Mung beans!"

"Yuh said beans twice."

"... I know. I was seeing if you were listening... You were." Bryce quickly went back to his breakfast, downing what remained of his sandwich as fast as he could.

"If all those other foods have protein then why do yuh only eat eggs?"

"Sprout, it's... it's just my thing. I mean, I had the same thing for breakfast back home: Two fried egg sandwiches, a side of grits, and a glass of milk, every morning."

Apple Bloom looked at Bryce opened mouthed. "Every morning!? Wait, what's a grit?"

Bryce chuckled to himself. "No, it's grits. There's more than one. They're small bits of dent corn that have been ground down, but not too ground down. What you do is you take this ground dent corn and put it in a small pot of boiling water, stirring it occasionally. Once the water's all boiled down you put a tablespoon or two of butter in it and let it melt. Finally, it's ready to serve. Add salt as desired."

"Oh. Why would anypony go through that trouble just ta have ground up corn? Couldn't they just have corn on the cob?"

"No, it's not the same. Yeah, corn on the cob is nice, but it's nothing compared to grits. It'll warm you up on a cold day and it sticks to your ribs."

Apple Bloom's pupils shrank. "It... sticks to your... ribs? Is it 'that' hot!?"

Bryce laughed again. "No, it means it'll keep you full for a while. I had the same reaction whenever my momma told me the same thing." Having said that, Bryce began to pull the crusts off his second sandwich.

At that moment, Granny Smith came trotting in from outside, with Corn and Winona following close beind. After saying her hellos to Bryce and Apple Bloom the aged mare went over to the cabinets and began to look each one up and down.

"Granny, what'cha doin?"

"Ah'm trying ta see what all your sister needs to get when shes goes sellin apples at the farmer's market today. We're gettin low on a lot of things."

While Granny Smith did this, Bryce was having to deal with the begging of the two canines that had followed the green mare inside. Taking one look at them, Bryce said, "No, you're only going to waste it."

Corn and Winona continued to eye Bryce's remaining fried egg sandwich.

Sighing heavily, Bryce relented, knowing full well it would indeed be a waste. Pulling of two sections of the egg he offered it to the dogs.

They both began to sniff Bryce's egg. After taking his portion into his mouth, Corn immediately dropped his onto the floor. Winona, on the other hand, ate her portion and took what was left of her much larger companion's.

Bryce shook his head. "You see, that's what you're supposed to do. You'll eat any meat I give you. You'll eat peanut butter. You'll eat what you had a few hours ago, again. But you won't eat that. Even though you know good and well what it is." Bryce shook his head again. "You're nothing better than something to talk to, but I love you so much." Bryce firmly petted Corn on the head. "Sprout, take them out, please."

Apple Bloom quickly did as she was asked. As the door closed Applejack came trotting in through the same door. When she set eyes on Bryce, who had started to down his glass of milk. The apple mare tried her best to not look at him and went over to Granny. "Okay, Granny, Ah'm all set. Do yuh have a list of everything Ah need ta get?"

"Ah'm finishing it now. But, AJ, do yuh think you could let Bryce go with yuh?"

"Uh, beg pardon?"

"Well, you're always tellin me how it takes yuh too long ta get everything 'and' sell apples all in the same day. If yuh let him go with yuh it would give yuh that much more time."

Applejack scratched the back of her head. "Uh, Granny, Ah don't... Ah don't think that would be a good idea."

"Ahh horseapples. He'll be fine."

"But he... He just went inta town not too long ago."

"That was two weeks ago. And besides it would be good for him ta get outta sight of the farm. Keeping the boy all cooped up her can't be good for him."

"Maybe not, but he... He doesn't know where all to go."

Granny Smith narrowed her eyes. "Maybe he doesn't, but that's not the point. He can find his way around."

Bryce slammed his empty glass on the table, ending the discussion between the two mares. "Would you both stop talking about me in third person!"

The kitchen became quiet following Bryce's outburst.

Getting up slowly, Bryce took his plate and glass and rinsed them out in the sink. After a few renditions of curling and uncurling his toes, Bryce looked over and said, "I'll do it."

Applejack was dumbfounded. "What...?"

"I'll get the stuff."

"What... but... you..."

Granny Smith interjected, "See, AJ. Bryce is willing ta help. Now if you'll give me a minute ta finish up you can both get on the road. Oh, and while you're at it why don't yuh take Apple Bloom with yuh too. It'd do her good ta get out."

Bryce nodded. "Well, with Dinky and Amethyst not coming today we have nothing better to do."

"You have a point there. Now, do yuh have any bits, sonny?"

"What's a bit?"

Granny Smith opened a drawer and pulled out a metal coin. "This is a bit."

Bryce shook his head. "I have green pieces of cloth with numbers on them."

Applejack began to eye the human. "Green pieces of cloth. They can't have much value then."

Bryce smirked. "You're not completely wrong."

"Well don't you worry. Ah'll get yuh enough ta get everything on the list. Ah'll even add a few more for you ta use. After all you've done around here you deserve some money ta spend on yourself."

Applejack began to protest. "Granny, we don't have that-"

Granny Smith shot her oldest granddaughter a look. "Hush. He's earned it." With that the aged mare left the room to go get the necessary amount of currency.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The walk into Ponyville was a rather uneventful one. The trio walked side-by-side with Apple Bloom trotting between Applejack and Bryce. The entire trip no one said anything, for whatever reason unknown to them all.

When they reached the outskirts Applejack broke the silence. "Now, Apple Bloom, Ah want yuh ta stay close ta Bryce when y'all are shopping. Around lunch time come on back to the stall just so Ah know you're alright. If yuh still feel like staying in town then you can drop off the groceries with me and go your own way, but Ah want yuh back at the my stall before it gets dark." The apple mare then looked up towards Bryce. "And Bryce... Just... try not ta..."

Bryce looked Applejack's way. "Try not to what?"

"Just... keep mah sister safe, and stay outta trouble."

They continued the rest of the trip in silence.

As the wagon rolled into the town square Bryce could see a cornucopia of the fruits and vegetables blossom forth. At each stall there was a different peddler attempting to sell their own home grown produce to whoever passed by. At one there were watermelons varying in size from ones that could fit in the palm of Bryce's hand to a scant few the size of his gut. At another stall there was a stallion trying to sell potatoes shaded in colors of red and yellow, brown and white. It was when Bryce saw a stall selling onions that made him cringe. The stench of the shopkeeper's breath caused Bryce's eyes to well up. It was as if the vendor ate only his own produce. If that were so Bryce didn't want to be around his other end..

A minute later they came to an empty stall. It was obvious to whom it belonged to when Applejack parked the wagon behind it. When the apple mare started to unload the baskets Bryce tried to help but was shooed off. "Bryce, go on and get the stuff on the list. You won't know how best ta set up everything anyway. And remember; be back here by lunchtime. Don't make me have ta come lookin for yuh both." Or make me have ta break up something you started, even if you weren't intending ta start it.

Bryce held his hands out at his sides. "Have some faith in me. That 'featherbrain' was the one who started it."

Applejack gave him an odd look. "Beg pardon?"

"Uh... I promise to try and get back by then."

"Good. Just follow the list. If there's anything yuh need come get me. And take my saddlebags with yuh to help yuh carry everything."

After shouldering the apple mare's saddlebags Bryce and Apple Bloom headed out. Pulling out the list Granny Smith had given him, Bryce gave it a look over. "Sprout, have you ever been her on a market day before?"

"Yeah, a few times."

"Well could you help me find our way around?"

"Ah'll try, but Ah don't know Ponyville all that well."

"Well any help you can give could help up get done faster. So... first thing is... carrots."

"Oh, Ah know where those are. We passed'em on the way in."

"Okay, show me the way."

The pair zigzaged their way through the square, the yellow filly leading the much larger human. As they passed the multitude of ponies they each gave Bryce a look as he went by. Many would immediately pull themselves out of his path, while others would keep their present course. The sheer number of ponies who were there did stress out Bryce somewhat, but there were a lot less than from his previous encounter.

Eventually, Apple Bloom stopped and stuck out her hoof. "There it is!"

Looking to where Apple Bloom indicated Bryce saw the entire stall selling only the thing he was currently after, carrots. As he stepped forward he began to rehearse what he would say to the shopkeeper.

At the counter there was a pale yellow mare with a curly orange mane. For whatever reason she seemed to be familiar to Bryce, he just couldn't quite put his finger on how or where he'd seen her.

When Bryce and Apple Bloom took a step towards the stall the mare occupying it began to shiver in her hooves. For the next few seconds Bryce and the yellow mare only stood and stared at each other, neither one sure what the other was thinking of doing.

After what seemed like an eternity, the mare asked, "Can I... he- he- help you...?"

"Well, I need some... carrots."

"Oh... H- How many d- do you need?"

Bryce opened his mouth to speak, but when he did no words came out. He pulled out the list to see if there was anything to tell him how many, but the list simply said the word 'carrots'. "I need... carrots."

"Y- Yes, I have ca- carrots... How many do you need?" The mare asked with the shaky grin.

The number of possible answers surged through Bryce's brain. The list said carrots, so there definitely needed to be more than one. At the stall there were baskets and baskets of carrots, at least half a thousand, if not a whole one. The only question was how many was the correct answer. Bryce could say all, but he highly doubted the apple farm would need that many. If not all then maybe half her stock, but at whatever price this monopolist was going to charge would be way more than Bryce even had. Then there was the other extreme. What if he was supposed to get only two carrots. Could that be right? That could be right, but what if it was too little. Bryce stood there, the right answer trying to come up, but there was no way to say what it was. He was lost. There was too little information to ask. He didn't know her price, how much a 'bit' could buy of anything, how much the price may go up if he came back later, the price of tea in China based on his ultimate decision... Wait, that had nothing to do with this, or anything like it.

Or did it?

"Is everything alright?" The yellow mare behind the counter asked.

Bryce looked at her. Whatever had been startling her about him before appeared to have evaporated. The appearance of fear she had had now looked to be more of one of concern. For him.

"Is there somepony I can find for-"

"Excuse me, is everything alright?" A familiar voice asked from behind Bryce.

Carrot Top shook in surprise when she heard that shrill voice.

Standing to Bryce's side, almost as if she had appeared out of nowhere, was Rarity with Fluttershy behind her.

"Is there anyway I can help?" The white mare asked.

"Well... uh... I..."

"He said he needs carrots, but he won't tell me how many."

"How many do you need?"

"I... need..." Bryce stammered out.

"Come now, darling. It's a simple question."

"It's.. The list..." Bryce began to twist the piece of parchment in his hands. "Only... says... carrots..."

Fluttershy suddenly stepped in front of Bryce and Rarity. "Excuse me, could you please give him half my usual amount? If you don't mind?"

"Sure, I can do that. And the usual for you?" Fluttershy nodded. Carrot Top bent down and began to bunch up some carrots. When she came back up she had three dozen tied together in three separate bunches. "There you are. That'll be ten bits for you, Fluttershy, and five for... Bryce."

"Yes. Here, I'll pay for-"

Bryce finally said his first whole sentence. "No, I'll pay for my own." He pulled out five of the coins, dropped them on the counter, placed one of the three bunches into Applejack's saddlebags, and walked off.

Apple Bloom had to struggle to try and keep up. "Bryce, slow down! Ah can't keep up!" When Bryce stopped the yellow filly came close to colliding with him. "Bryce, what's the matter?"

"It's complicated. Let's go on and get everything else."

In that time both Rarity and Fluttershy came running over to him. "Bryce, what are you doing?" Rarity asked.

"I'm out buying groceries."

"No, why are you running away? And why were you just standing back there?"

Bryce didn't respond.

"Why won't you answer me!?"

Fluttershy stepped up again. "Rarity, don't be so hard on him. Not everypony can be as open as you."

"I know, but he's an adult. He should be able to at least give a simple answer."

Fluttershy ignored Rarity and stood before Bryce. "Bryce, is there a reason you felt you couldn't answer?"

He meekly answered, "Well... I didn't know how many carrots I... was supposed to get, and I don't know how much anything costs."

"Could I take a look at your list?" Bryce handed the crumpled up list to the buttercup pegasus. "Oh, I see what you mean. This is your first time, and you got caught up in what was the right amount." Fluttershy gave the list back to Bryce. "Bryce, Rarity and I have some more things we need to buy. Do you mind if we help you pick out everything on your list?"

"Well, if you don't mind."

"It's no trouble, honest. Right, Rarity?"

"Of course it's not. After all, what are friends for?" Rarity said as she brushed up her curled mane.

"Now then, what's next on your list?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Here you are, sir, that'll be four bits." Bryce reached into his coin sack for the umpteenth time that day and pulled out the spcified amount of coinage. "Thank you. have a nice day." After pocketing his purchase, Bryce walked away from the stall with Rarity, Fluttershy, and Apple Bloom in tow. Since their meeting things had went from bad to good to better. With the two mares' help he was able to acquire eveything on his list while helping him with specific amounts when the need arise.

"Now then, about how many more items are on your list?" Rarity asked.

"Well, there's only one more thing left. Two pounds of shelled walnuts."

"That's an easy one. There's a stall which sells only nuts not too far from my boutique. You know, where I make my beautiful dresses, each one made to perfectly bring out the best appearance of its wearer."

"That, and lingerie." Bryce said with a smirk.

"... Well, yes... Let us continue."

Along the way, Apple Bloom asked, "What do yuh mean by laundry?"

"I'll tell you whenever you're older, Sprout."

The group made their way towards Carousel Boutique. Rarity was the first to say anything. "Ahh, there he is."

Where she pointed there was a stall brimming with baskets and barrels of different kinds of edible nuts. Standing close by was a light chestnut coated, dark maned earth pony which Bryce took to be the owner.

"Bryce, we're going to allow you to take care of this one yourself, since you already know how much you need," Rarity said with Fluttershy nodding in agreement. "Do you think you can manage that?"

"Well, I'll try. Will you stay until I'm done?"

"Of course, darling. Somepony will need to watch after Apple Bloom after all."

"Well, okay."

Curling and uncurling his toes a few times, Bryce made his way towards the chestnut stallion's stall. At his approach a matching pair of almond colored unicorn fillies with dark manes came running out at Bryce. "Hey, Mister. Are you wanting to buy our nuts!?" One of the fillies shouted.

Bryce was thrown back by the filly's question. "Buy your...?"

The second filly added, "We have lots of nuts."

They both began to take turns listing off the kinds of nuts they had to offer. "There's hazelnuts,"

"Chestnuts,"

"Peanuts,"

"Almonds,"

"Pea cans,"

"Cat shoes."

The light chestnut stallion rushed over at the sounds of his foals' ranting. "Sir, I do apologize," he said in a Trottingham accent. "This is their first time helping me at my stall... and..." The stallion's apology slowed when he noticed to whom he was speaking. "Oh dear..."

Bryce and the stallion both stood looking at each other for what felt like the longest time. It was hard to tell if the stallion was afraid of the human in front of him, or intrigued.

A minute later the light chestnut stallion found the nerve to speak. "Pardon me, but is your name Bryce?"

"Yeah."

"Oh, well, I apologize for my lapse in thought, but you seemed so much smaller when I saw you on the steps of Sugarcube Corner. You see, there never been anything like you in these parts."

"Well, I get that a lot."

"Yes, well, I suppose you would. Now then, is there something I can help you with?"

"Yeah, I'm here to get some shelled walnuts."

The stallion's mood quickly shifted. "Well if that's what here for then you came to the right place. How much are you looking for?"

"Uh... two pounds."

"Girls, go get our customer his walnuts, please." The two fillies did as their father asked. "Again I do apologize for my children. You know kids; always trying their hardest and putting too much enthusiasm into their pitches. They're just a couple of Nuts from the same Nut. Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Kernal Nut. These are my daughters, Almondine and Butter Pecan."

Both fillies came running back with a paper bag in their mouths. "Her's ur walnuh, Mhum Bryce."

Bryce took the bags from them both. "Okay, how much?"

"That'll be twelve bits for the walnuts. Tell you what; why don't I give you a sample of my wife's newest recipe. Free of charge."

Bryce paid for the walnuts while Kernal gave him a jar containing a dark chocolate substance. Bryce held it up to his eye level. Around the edges he could see nuts sticking out from whatever was supposed to be contained within. "What is this supposed to be?"

"From what she said it's supposed to be a spread composed of chocolate and ground hazelnuts. I hate to ask, but would you mind giving it a try now and tell me what you think of it? You see, my wife wants some feedback on her work."

"Okay, since you asked." Bryce unscrewed the lid and dipped his pinky inside.

Kernal Nut smiled, anticipating what was to come.

Bryce was expecting something close to Nutella, if that was what this stallion's wife had been aiming for. Instead he was met with a sour taste with what felt like whole nuts and rock candy added in. Looking at Apple Bloom, Bryce could see it had the same effect on her.

"It's... okay."

The smile Kernal had began to appear forced. "Just okay?"

"Well, I was expecting it to taste like chocolate, and feel like creamy peanut butter. This tastes like your wife went overboard on the lemon extract and overcooked the sugar. It feels like crunchy peanut butter. I woud suggest she substitute the lemon extract with vanilla, about a teaspoon or two, and grind the hazelnuts down some more. She should try and not cook the sugar for so long so it doesn't clump together. If it's supposed to be a spread you want it to be like margarine, or regular peanut butter. Not lumpy and crunchy."

Kernal had been listening to Bryce intensely. Dipping his hoof into a fresh jar he had a taste himself. "Hmm, I can see what you mean. I'll pass it along to her. Do you have experience with this kind of work?"

"Well... I can cook. I've never tried making anything like this, but I do love to eat. I have a second sense with these kinds of things."

"Ahh, I understand what you mean. You see my wife has just recently tried to make what she calls 'the next biggest thing in Equestria.' My daughters and I have endured a hundred different recipes, at least, and it's something she has her heart set on. It's only recently she even let me offer a taste to my customers."

"Well, it's an ambition, I'll give it that."

"You're right about that. Now, is there anything else I can get for you?"

"Well, not right now."

"Then thank you for stopping by. Please come again soon. Say bye kids."

Butter Pecan and Almondine said goodbye in unison. "Bye, Mister Bryce."

"Look, it's just Bryce. I'm only 23; not an old geezer with a humpback, a turkey neck, and no teeth who hates seeing kids on his lawn." Bryce bent forward, sucked in both his lips, and flexed his neck muscles. "Now I'm an old geezer," Bryce said, imitating an old man's voice. "You kids stay off my lawn or I'll tell your parents on you."

The two fillies began to laugh at Bryce's imitation. Kernal had to bring a hoof to his mouth to keep himself from laughing. "Now, now, girls, we have work to do."

Waving them off, Bryce walked back towards his friends, who had been watching his charade the entire time. Rarity was the first to speak. "So how did it go?"

"It went well. I got the walnuts."

"Did you remember to thank him?" Fluttershy asked.

Bryce began to scratch the back of his head. "Well... No..."

"You should try and remember to thank somepony who helps you with something."

"I... I know, I just forgot."

"Don't feel too bad. You should be proud you were able to do this yourself. What were you doing at the end?."

"I was pretending to be an older gentleman. Just trying to make the kids laugh."

"I will say this, you do tend to do better with children than with ponies your age," Rarity complimented.

"Yeah, well, it's just one of my things." Bryce took a look at his watch. "I'd like to stay, but Apple Bloom's sister wanted us back by lunchtime."

"If that's so then I'll let you two be on your way."

"Okay. And thanks for helping me today. I wouldn't have been able to do anything without y'all."

"Don't mention it, darling. It's the least we could do." With that the two mares took their leave.

"Come, Sprout, let's get back before your sister makes an ape skin rug out of me. Or not, I not sure how she feels anymore. What would you say to some ice cream later on? I think I have enough bits to buy us a cone."

Apple Bloom gave Bryce a big smile and nodded rapidly.

Bryce smirked. "Somehow I knew you'd say yes."

Comments

[damnaion]

chapter 40 aww this is a good slice of life chapter

[akarock]

Damn kids get off my lawn!!! *shakes cane at whippersnappers*