Twilight sat on the balcony to preform one of her many duties since becoming a princess, painting the night sky. The job was originally held by her aunt but was given to her due to the fact she, by accident, put a new constellation in the night sky, using hardly any of the power it usually took Luna.
Once the moon was nearly in the sky, Twilight focused on her magic and pointed her head directly at the sky. Her horn glowed in a rose aura as she channelled her magic. Soon, stars rose from her horn and shot into the sky, exploding in the night sky and painting it. Millions of stars, constellations, and galaxies covered the night sky as the moon journeyed into the sky. The glow around her horn faded and she opened her eyes to view her work.
She had been the Princess of Magic and Stars for about a year now. She was in a happy relationship, which they still needed to tell her mother about, and wanted to take to a new level. Twilight thought for a moment. The only two things she could think of stepping up to is marriage and a foal. She didn't know which one Dash wanted let alone what she wanted. But they both agreed, Celestia needed to be told first.
There was a soft knock on the door and the knob was engulfed in an golden aura. Twilight shook awake the sleeping Pegasus that layed on her bed, telling her that her mother arrived. Rainbow Dash rubbed the sleep out of her eyes as Celestia and Luna stepped into the deep lavender room that served as Twilight's bedroom.
"Good evening, Rainbow Dash. I did not know my daughter invited you along." said Celestia as she sat down on the woven rug in her daughters room. Luna sat next to her after giving Dash a nod in greeting. She sat down, making sure they were some distance apart to avoid suspicions.
"Yes, we'll, you see, me and Dash have something to tell you that we should have a long time ago." started Twilight.
"If only Twi didn't keep getting cold hooves." said Rainbow, blowing a strand of rainbow mane out of her face. Twilight glared at her.
"We'll your mother isn't the most powerful being in Equestria." she fired back. Rainbow dismissed it with a wave of her hoof. Twilight smiled and rolled her eyes. "Alright then, you tell them." Rainbow's eyes went wide and she seemed to pale.
"No. I'm good. You can tell them." sputtered Rainbow. Twilight giggled and rolled her eyes.
"I'm getting quiet curious on what this is you are talking about." said Luna, looking between the two. Celestia nodded in agreement.
"Yes, I would like to know why you asked us to come her, my dear daughter." Twilight sighed and looked up at her mother, keeping her head low.
"Me and Rainbow having been dating the past year."
"What?!" yelled Celestia, causing everyone in the room to flinch. "How come you have waited a whole year to tell your mother?" she demanded. Luna quickly stepped in.
"Now Tia. We have been keeping the fact that we are dating for three years." She quickly placed a hoof over her mouth as she realized what she said. Both her and Celestia paled, which was a feat for Celestia. They turned to the two ponies who sat staring at the, with their jaws hanging open. Celestia glared at Luna.
"Luna!"
"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to say it, it just came out." She gave a small smirk. "You actually look hot when you are angry."
"You're sleeping in your room tonight."
"That's torture, Tia!"
"Well that's what you get for telling them that we are dating before we are ready."
"Alright, alright, let's try to clear things up. Me and Tia will go first since we seem to be the bigger item." said Luna, shifting into a more comfy position. "You see, me and Tia were both orphaned around the same time, but are from different families. Our mother who ruled before us took us in and raised us since we were always close to each other and acted like sisters.
"After her death three hundred years before my rise to Nightmare Moon, me and Tia were no longer sisters but the public didn't see it that way. They called us sisters for our appearance and the fact we had the same mother. Twenty years after mothers death we got together up until Nightmare Moon." She finished and looked to Celestia to see if she missed something. She nodded her head telling her that she did alright.
"But why haven't you came out and corrected the public about you being sisters?" asked Twilight, still trying to come off shock.
"Because I really couldn't while she was not with me to confirm it." replied Celestia, referring to Luna's bamishment. "And we didn't do it before your coronation because we wanted to see how they reacted to that first. Now it's been a year and we believe we are ready."
"So tomorrow we are holding a press conference to not only come out about us being foster sisters once upon a time, but also the fact we are lesbian and are dating each other." added Luna.
"Well, that came only end smoothly." muttered Rainbow Dash. Celestia giggled and pointed a hoof at her.
"You haven't forgotten the fact you and Twilight still have to come out to the public, right." asked Celestia with a smirk. Rainbow's eyes went wide.
"Don't tell me..."
"Yep. Me and Tia won't be the only ones coming out tomorrow." said Luna. Twilight sighed with relief at the fact that she could stop hiding it but Rainbow tensed at the fact she had to come out in front of a room of reporters.
"Do I have to?" she whined, not exactly warm to the idea.
"You are my marefriend and we need to tell the public together." said Twilight. Rainbow sighed.
"Fine. Only because you can be very convincing and sexy at the same time." said Rainbow with a small smile. The two kissed until they were broke up by Celestia clearing her throat. The two blushed as they became aware of their company.
"How did you two get together, by the way?" asked Luna.
"We'll I had feelings for Twilight since she came to Ponyville and they slowly grew over the years. I guess I got the guts to tell her how I felt and she returned those feelings after a gave her some space." said Dash, nuzzling into the larger mare that sat next to her. "And we have been together since."
"Have you thought about taking it to another step into your relationship yet?" asked Celestia.
"Um, well, we did but we don't know where." said Twilight, Rainbow nodding. Luna cocked her head.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, the only two options we have is marriage or a foal and I don't know if we are ready." replied Twilight.
"Why not both?" Everyone stared at Luna. "What? Propose and have a foal. Have the wedding before or just after birth. It could work." Twilight thought for a moment.
"Alright." she said with a nod. She then gave a smirk. "But you two have to do the same." Celestia stared at her with her mouth open. Luna put her hoof to her jaw for a moment.
"Deal."
"Lulu! You seriously can't be considering this!" exclaimed Celestia.
"Why not? We have been together for about two hundred and twenty three years."
"A thousand of which you spent on the moon."
"So? I think it's time we got married. Besides, we thought about a foal plenty of times." Celestia put a hoof to her face and sighed.
"Fine." Luna and Twilight hoof bumped. "But who is going to carry the foals?"
"Oh, that's easy." said Twilight. "You and Rainbow."
"Wait, why me?!" yelled Rainbow.
"Well, mom already has experience in the area and you are not a unicorn."
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"The caster can't get themselves pregnant." said Celestia. "What? How do you think Twilight was born? I'm gay and Im proud to admit no stallions were used in her making." Luna giggled.
"Fine. You better help make a beautiful baby." she said as she jabbed at Twilight's side, making her yelp.
"Royal baby-boomers. Well there is a first for everything." muttered Celestia.
so no sad tag later down the road? just asking.
Hooray for sequels!
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We might see it. For now it is non-existent but it may make an appearance later on.
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can you at least tell us before hand?
It's rare to see a Lunestia where they have a foal, only ever seen it once before in fact. Will the foals be born before the end of this?
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Most likely a chapter or two before the end. This just focuses on the pregnancy, weddings, and a certain cult rising up only to be crushed by a not so happy mother to be.
nice, if you want a prereader, sir...
data.whicdn.com/images/48904992/Now-you-have-my-attention._large.jpg
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Decaprio! I will keep that in mind,
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It probably will not. This is more Slice of Life (completely forgot the tag. ) like the one before it. It will be sad at times but I might not go as far as Sad tag. For now, its just Romance, Slice of Life, and AU.
I am already loving this story, though I think you should add a mane six tag if only because they deserve to be told, and even if Twi and Dashie didn't tell them Pinkie Pie's pinkie sense would and besides shouldn't aunts be told about an incoming foal?
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All these tags I'm forgetting.
I tried to plane an attack once, but it turned out they had a pretty good air force.
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Oh, the spelling fail hurts.
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Have you ever been shot down by an air force led by Marshmallow People? 'Cuz I'm sure that hurts a bit more.
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Damn marshmallow people.
Featured spot on 9/10. Thank you for that. Keep up voting and faveing. Lets see how long it can stay.
I think I'm opting out of this. The story itself is a pinch weak, although eventful, it fails to completely deliver. It could be from the shortness of the chapters, the brevity in how you cover things, or something else. Additionally, the grammatical, structural, tense, capitalization, similar sounding words... errors that are so abundant it's more of a surprise to not see an error every sentence makes it painful to read through. You seriously need to get an editor to clean this stuff up and teach you how to improve your writing.
I'm sorry, but as it stands this just isn't worth the effort to muddle my way through it. While I applaud your writing speed, you need to start focusing on quality, not quantity.
Good luck, both with the story and in the search for an editor.
Definitely an improvement grammar and word wise from the last story.
..Anywhore?
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Ray William Johnson qoute
3186531 As Benjamin Franklin once said, and I quote, "to err is human, to repent divine,to persist devilish."
So long as you own up to your mistake's, and at least try to fix them, then there is nothing more a person can ask of you.
P.S.
If you ever need a proofreader let me know ok.
ok that first chapter was pretty freaking funny
Aaaand, now' I'm following you.
...your math is terrible
Sorry it took me so long to get to this. I'm bogged down by finishing up Exie's Contest fic. Now onto the story.
Ok. I have a problem with this, or at least how it's written. You have it as if Twilight deals with the night completely. Which is Luna's Special Talent. The very reason she went Night Mare Moon was that ponies weren't appreciating her night sky. So just because a new constellation popped up wouldn't make her give up her special talent to some pony else. Especially when she draws great joy with painting the night. I can see her being miffed at first, and / or have Twilight assist her with the night sky, bonding with her niece. But not just a step down.
Or is it that Luna raises the moon, and the night sky. Then Twilight adds stars to it? While that doesn't make a lot of sense ... since the stars pop up when Luna raises her night. I guess I can see an AU were the night starts black, and stars pop up afterwards ... but than how did Celestia raise the stars?
I could see the stars staying in the sky and coming out when the sun is lowered. And Luna (now Twilight I guess) touching it up here and there. Or changing it slightly [making brighter, shifting slightly, moving from northern to southern constellations as the seasons change appropriately]. But it just was something that bothered me with how it was written.
It could use some clarification, and clearing up so that it doesn't sound like Luna gave Twilight her night. Unless she's going to go NMM later on again.
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I
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You need to clarify this.
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Ok now onto the critique of this chapter.
The opening I'll admit bothered me that it took away a good bit from the opening chapter. Mostly since Luna doesn't care how much power it takes her to do the night sky it's something she ended up imprisoned for a thousand years on the moon because ponies where appreciating her night, although her and Twilight sharing that time together to bond as a family I can see, but this was talked about in detail above so I'll skip this part of the critique.
The relationship point of this chapter. Which honestly this chapter should have focused souly, was rather good. I liked Luna's slip of the tongue, and Rainbow's ribbing was funny. Twilight and Celestia's interactions with the loves of their lives was adorable. And all in all was great. I loved what you did there, and seeing Rainbow Dash as a mother and Tia carry Twilight's sister is going to be magical.
I greatly look forward to reading the next chapter. Congrats on a 95% great start on a great first chapter!
Once the moon was nearly in the sky, Twilight focused on her magic and pointed her head directly at the sky. Her horn glowed in a rose aura as she channeled her magic. Soon, stars rose from her horn and shot into the sky, exploding in the night sky and painting it. Millions of stars, constellations, and galaxies covered the night sky as the moon journeyed into the sky. The glow around her horn faded and she opened her eyes to view her work.
um....u like the word 'sky', don't u? XD
i also fixed the word 'channeled' in this paragraph.
Luna is that little girl from the El Paso taco commercials who says "Why not both?" I can't unsee it
Um... For some reason there are no words in Solar Child!!!!! I also can't comment on it wuts going on??? I iz confuzzled. I'm saying it here cuz I can no comment on prev storeh
"Why not? We have been together for about two hundred and twenty three years."
For this to be correct based on what you said; "After her death three hundred years before my rise to Nightmare Moon, me and Tia were no longer sisters but the public didn't see it that way. They called us sisters for our appearance and the fact we had the same mother. Twenty years after mothers death we got together up until Nightmare Moon."
300-20=280. 280+3=283
they should have been dating for 283 years instead of 223. Also if you count the time Luna was on the moon, due to the fact that she never broke up with Tia, could actually mean that they have been together for 1,283 years.
Huh, a bit weird reading it without reading the original, but I like it. I hope it turns out good for Chryssie.
Cya
Raziel-chan
You have my attention!