noise."July 21 Status Blog · 12:13am Jul 22nd, 2020
Every now and then I’ve got a bunch of stuff that really doesn’t fit anywhere else. Story-wise, I’ve got collections for those brain dribbles. Blog-wise . . . well, here you go!
I’m behind on the next chapter of OPP . . . what else is new :P. A bunch of things came up, and I got distracted by a couple new shinies. Such is life.
I’ve also got a fic that was an entry into the Quills and Sofas speedwriting contest number 100. It’s getting final polish over the next couple of days; I think y’all will enjoy it. Or some of y’all.
Source (tumblr’s NSFW...)
I’ve also got another speedwriting fic that’s in the editing process. Got slowed down by a few things, not the least of which is Northern Rail’s schedule at one particular stop. Incidentally, any of my friends who are Brits and live around Middlesbrough and are interested in pre-reading, drop me a line.
Also, now that I’m on the subject of things that I could use input for, people who stream games on Twitch, and people who are familiar with Trader Joe’s.
Work-wise, we finally got caught up for a day . . . last Friday was pretty chill and I got to leave a half hour early. This week we were back at it.
My manager’s getting absentminded, too. Remember when I wrote a story inspired by him losing track of a sheet of paper I put between his hands? Today he asked me the same thing several times; I mentioned it to him after work, and he denied it, and then the following conversation happened:
Him: Did you bring in the keys to that Suburban?
Me: Yes.
Him: Did you roll up the window?
Me: I rolled up the driver’s side window . . . were there any others down?
Him: <crickets>
Me: I’ll go check.
<goes to check; comes back inside>
Me: All the windows are rolled up.
Him: Did you bring in the keys?
In other interesting automotive news, automakers sometimes issue TSBs (Technical Service Bulletins) which address a particular pattern failure on a vehicle, and sometimes a new process to fix it. Those aren’t warranty issues per se, but depending on circumstances the affected part or system sometimes gets additional coverage, or it’s up to the discretion of the dealership.
(Sometimes they’re general, too; for example, there was probably a TSB that GM issued stating that Dexron VI could be used in lieu of Dexron III in automatic transmissions from prior-year models.)
On occasion they’re oddly specific. Sometimes by region, and . . . well, here’s one from Ford (paraphrased):
TSB 06-20-9
Intermittent Crank-No Start with Various DTCs Stored In Memory
Vehicles affected: 2006-2007 Fusion, 2006-2007 MilanIssue:
Some 2006-2007 vehicles built with a 2.3L engine may exhibit an intermittent crank no start along with a Passive Anti Theft System light flashing during cranking and various codes stores in memory. The root cause has been found to be related to radio interference related to a shopping cart anti-theft device installed at some 99 Cent or Dollar store parking lots. (bold added)Action:
To resolve the customer concern reprogram the PCM to the latest calibration. . .
I wonder how long it took the boffins to figure that malfunction out?
It’s not the only TSB I’ve seen that was that specific, either; there was one I didn’t think to save involving certain late-model full-size Chevy and GMC trucks setting an airbag light . . . but only trucks that had visited a certain Texas city (can’t remember which one) and had driven by an particular military antenna farm. They actually named the road where this would happen in the TSB, which is the first time I’ve seen a TSB call out a specific road.
I can’t remember if the TSB had a fix for that issue (more RFI shielding on the side-impact sensor, maybe?) or just suggested that owners not drive down that road until a fix was developed.
I’ll leave you with this gem:
It’s from The Onion, so you know it’s true.
I feel your pain regarding the priorities of meatspace vs writing horsewords. The struggle is real, my friend.
Regarding that TSB, in the famous words of the E Clampus Vitus: Credo Quia Absurdum
I don't go to Trader Joes very often, but they often have decent deals on cheap sparkling wine. Their fish nuggets are good, too.
As for Twitch, I deeply admire Pink Kitty Rose, but she's mostly quit youtube entirely in favor of Twitch. I'm sure she has her reasons, but as a website, Twitch is a fugly unintuitive mess to navigate, and the video buffering is likely to stall if you pause it and do stuff in another tab for a bit, forcing you to refresh the page and restart the video. Very irritating.
*gives him headpats*
Stay safe hun, and keep on writing. <3
Your fans will understand when "life" happens.
I have passing familiarity with Trader Joe's, given that they're more or less local to my region. Hit me up on Discord.
5318165
I don't think you understand the point of streaming...
On top of giving us the oddest, most interesting auto malfunction mysteries, you always give us the cutest pones. Thanks for all of that.
That video certainly is an excellent metaphor for our government response to today's issues. And that final tag line really fits:
5318187
Obviously I'm talking about old saved streams, not live ones.
Two things:
1 I am impressed and proud that you spelled DEXRON correctly and did not add a "T". It drives me batty when people do that. We would loose points if the instructor heard you say that in tech school. (another peeve is "juice" running in wires).
2 GM has a TSB for hard starting issues on black and dark blue diesel trucks in extreme cold weather. Apparently if the vehicle sits outside overnight and into the morning, the sun beating down on the dark paint will raise the temp reading on the intake air temp sensor. This causes the computer to think the actual temp is higher than it is, and puts it in a wrong starting strategy.
Weird RF interferences is how the police helicopter EMP system works for when it cant get the remote codes off the dark net. Similar pulse radars occured on the Yorkshire moors.
Thats why I like mechanical diesels, well maintained, and shielding that handles direct lightning and exploding BBQs.
I really need to look into detail just whats needed for these old MosFETS to use them for a car. I mean, 2 megawatts must be able to power something.
Yeah, computer problems are bad enough. Add in cars and you get "My car doesn't start when I park at Dollar General. Everywhere else, it's just fine." These are the reasons why Skynet is so laughable. "Yeah, the Terminator units were really terrifying until we realized we could beat them to death with shopping carts and they wouldn't react."
So kind of like how you can use ATF+4 in place of ATF+3? (But don't even think about using Dexron/Mercon in place of ATF+3 or ATF+4, doing that is baaaad news. Really, about the only Mopar you should use anything but ATF+4 in is some Jeeps when they have specific transmissions installed.)
5318256 I've literally never had an issue with that. Been using Dexron III for basically everything for like 10 years now. I'm a transmission mechanic. I think where you're getting that from is back in the days when Dexron II (2) would eat up Chrysler A604's, incidentally, that's the reason people are mistakenly under the impression those transmissions are unreliable.
Never had any comebacks that indicated a problem with the oil. It was only a couple of years ago that GM stopped licensing the Dexron name, before that, a third party oil maker had to prove it was up to specs with GM. Not anymore, that's why transmission fluid is now called something like 'Not-dexron III' or whatever.
Obviously, CVTs are a grand exception to that rule.
Also, on the topic of trans fluid, that's all I use for power steering too. Yes, now that's heresy! It's just hydraulic fluid, all of that crap about ruining your seals is nonsense. I have a friend and he insists upon using power steering fluid in his old GM cars. I bought him an official GM service manual for his 1975 Olds. Under fluid specifications, it literally says to use Dexron II for power steering! Not as a substitute, the actual specification.
Of course, we will make exception for foreign cars that use mineral oil type stuff. Incidentally, CHS 11s IS backwards compatible with 7.1 (and LHM or whatever the hell Rolls calls it). That supposed incompatibility is also bullshit - that one I actually had to do research on for a customer with a shitty old Rolls that LEAKS hydraulic oil constantly. Guess what? Volkswagen says it's backwards compatible for their cars. Everyone else says no, but they're wrong!
Another thing, the Toyota Prius "CVT" - it's not. On the first one I worked on, everyone and their dog said it was a CVT (although you could technically call it continuously variable). Yet, the Toyota specification for trans fluid is not a CVT fluid at all, but rather, Toyota's basic bitch ATF. And I found out why - there's no transmission in the transmission! The oil is for lubrication only, there are no hydraulic components at all. In fact, there isn't much of anything in there. 2 motors, some gears, that's it. You could put dirty motor oil in it and it would be fine.
5318385
Not that strange. One of the vehicles we have at the moment (the odd-one-out that's not a Mopar) actually says right in the manual to put Type F transmission fluid into the power steering. Reminds me, sometime I need to find where the power steering in that car keeps leaking at and fix that...
,,,that and their occasional habit of sometimes ejecting the diff pin through the housing and trashing things in the process. Seen a few before that've done that. I seem to remember there being multiple (attempted) fixes for that issue from Mopar (such as a keeper of some sort, and then a bracket to keep that from coming off and letting the pin eject itself...)
5318409
Hehehehe so have I! It's been a while, though. The fix we use is some aftermarket thing, a bracket that bolts on with the ring gear bolts, and is basically just a finger on either side of the pin to stop it from moving. Still my favorite transmission.
Mopar or nocar!
5318411
Reminds me, been meaning to pick one up somewhere and build it up some to put into a particular vehicle. Or pulling the one in the vehicle out and doing stuff to it, less things to mess with to make sure it's compatible as far as cables and switches and such.
(Basically, I have a '90 Caravan C/V that's been sitting out back on one of the family's properties. Last year with the big flat front grille, first year with the 3.3l. And having the 3.3l, it also has the bigger front brakes, meaning not all sizes of Caravan rims will fit on it.)
Kind of been looking at this page, though some of the things seem a bit excessive for my usage: https://web.archive.org/web/20080919142136/http://dodgedynasty.50megs.com/a604/improve.html
Also I have this printed out diagram (I forget where I got it from, or what it's originally supposed to be from, but it's clearly in copy-of-a-copy-of-a-copy territory) that's supposed to detail some changes to a separator plate to IIRC make it behave differently when shifting. The text below the diagram says this:
Any ideas on where it might be from and/or where to get a better quality version of it?
"Got slowed down by a few things, not the least of which is Northern Rail’s schedule at one particular stop. Incidentally, any of my friends who are Brits and live around Middlesbrough and are interested in pre-reading, drop me a line."
...Well, that doesn't raise curiosity at all, does it? :D
I hope your manager's not doing too badly.
Thanks for the blog. :)
5318424 You're not giving me much to go on. If I had to guess, I'd say it's telling you to drill out some of the holes in the valve body plate... one of them. But anyway, I doubt I could get you the diagram, unless it happens to be in my very old A604 book.
For your 90 caravan... I think they continued to have different 14" and 15"+ wheel hub designs. I *think* you should be able to use most later caravan rims, from 96 and up. There are quite a number of good-looking OEM aluminum rim designs for them. Unfortunately for you, the older, smaller wheel hub is identical to the PT Cruiser, which has a WIDE variety of aftermarket rims available.
5318436
Yeah, later Caravans share the same bolt pattern, actually had to borrow the spare from the '90 for a (either third or fourth)-gen Caravan that had two flats one shortly after another with only one spare tire. Actually pulled some 17-inch rims from a Grand Caravan a while back that was heading to the scrapyard, though the tires on said rims were junk, so they'd need new tires for me to be able to use them. (Though with as long as it's been parked there, new tires are probably a really good idea whichever rims I end up going with...)
Oh, here's that diagram that I was talking about before, I took a (admittedly not that great) photo of it with my phone...
https://i.imgur.com/qNxjPsO.jpg
Hey, where's the source for that last image?
Huh, lots of car talk in the comments here; did you find a twitch streamer at all? I do it sometimes, not usually for like... viewers, but, heh. I definitely spend entirely too much time watching them though (and I can't imagine how much worse that problem would be if there was a pony doing the streams...)
Anyway, if there are any questions I'd be happy to help!
5318156
I know, right?
Hey, as more and more tech gets out there, we’ll see more and more of this. The biggest problem on our end is when we don’t have access to the information--some years ago, we had a Ford that didn’t have a functional radio, and we later found out from the customer (after she took it to Ford) that the root cause was programming a second iPhone to it, and that there was a software update.
5318165
I’ve legit never been to a Trader Joe’s in my life.
Hmm. I watch some people who also stream on Twitch, although I’ve never personally been on Twitch myself. I would imagine that some of the video buffering could be due to internet connection or computer speed . . . right now, I’m having issues with YouTube due to other internet issues. At least, I suspect that’s why, since they’re all related to when I’m on Sprint’s network.
5318183
Except that one who threatened to chain me to a radiator and beat me until I updated . . .
I miss her. Conversations were always a hoot.
5318187
Plan on more hitting up going forward
5318189
For years, cute ponies have gotten me through the rough spots, so it’s only fitting that I include them in blog posts.
Yes and yes. If only we stopped testing, we’d have no confirmed cases.
5318204
Two things:
1a: I’ll admit I almost did, because even though I know what it’s actually called, years and years of hearing it called the wrong thing weigh heavily.
1b: Obviously it’s not juice in the wires, it’s pixies. And when you’ve got a bunch of them, they get angry.
That’s one I hadn’t come across, but I could believe it. One of the aircraft companies my brother worked for had a similar design flaw; they, too, needed an ambient air temperature sensor, and to avoid the problems with putting it in direct sunlight, they decided to put it on the bottom of the fuselage. Where it would dutifully measure pavement temperature.
Their workaround? If the reading wasn’t accurate, let the pilot put in the correct reading.
5318220
Back in Ye Olden Times, all you needed was an unshielded Chrysler ignition coil, and you could shut down radio signals for . . . well, not miles, but tens of feet.
Well, yeah, because on an old mechanical diesel there’s nothing that cares about RFI.
Also, from personal experience, some older engines worked perfectly well while on fire.
It’ll get the spark plugs to go, even if there isn’t an electrode on them any more. And if you’ve got 2 megawatts, you won’t need spark plug wires, either--a string will do just fine.
5318223
I think it was Randall Munroe who covered the rise of the home appliances in one of his What If blogs . . . unplugging the router will do in lots of your smart appliances, smaller ones can be covered in a metal bowl, and for roombas gone rogue, a few inches of water on the floor will stop them right in their tracks.
I’ve never personally tried it, but I’ve heard that if you apply a tazer directly to a car’s antenna (especially the old metal ones) the radio doesn’t like it much. And I can tell you from personal experience at auto shops, reverse battery polarity or give a car more than seventeen volts and it’s going to be a sad panda. Some cars are fused to protect the electrical system against reverse polarity, but not all of them are.
5318256
Yes, just like the ATF +3 vs. ATF +4. Ford’s got a similar thing with LV, SP, and Mercon V, but I don’t remember exactly what’s a substitute for what.
Many automakers have some models with CVTs, and those don’t take standard transmission fluids. Often they’re called out as exceptions (i.e., you can put Dex 6 in any GM vehicle except...)
5318385
It is technically a CVT, since it is, as you point out, continuously variable.
The thing that kills those transmissions when it comes to fluid is electrical conductivity. Too much of it, the hybrid systems sees the electrical leak, and shuts you down; way too much metal and things arc to other things and you’ve got a very expensive fix. As far as I know, you could use any fluid in there as long as it lubricated things and wasn’t electrically conductive. I assume they specced out their basic ATF because that’s what the dealers would have (I can’t remember for sure, but they’re T-IV fluid, aren’t they?). Also, I’ve never thought about it until just now, but I bet there isn’t a trans filter in those things, because why would there be? Or if there is, it’s probably just a screen to keep rocks out of the pump, if it even has a pump.
5319045.
1c When thy get angry enough they let out the magic smoke and then you are truly FUBARed!
5318411
Next year you can call ‘em Stellantises.
EDIT: also, I’d thought that Chrysler was running out of other automakers to get in bed with . . . apparently, I was wrong.
5318434
There’s one particular location that as far as I can tell they only stop at on Sundays, and I can’t figure out why.
He’s in his usual form. For better or worse. . . .
5318526
Currently, hidden in a private message on Discord. I’ll be more forthcoming when the story that’s the coverart to drops.
5318646
That happens sometimes . . . I don’t mind; people get to ask other people stuff that they know about and I don’t, and in the process I sometimes wind up learning a thing or two.
Not yet!
That’s better than anybody else who’s
offered tributevolunteered yet. I watch some streamers on YouTube, but have never seen anyone on Twitch, so while I know it’s a thing and have some idea about how some of it probably works, I have no practical experience.Thanks! I’m currently in the middle of multiple projects, and that’s one of ‘em; do you mind if I send you a link? No questions currently (it’s still incomplete), but I’m sure as I nail down some of the finer details, I’ll need a few specifics I don’t have.
5319073
This is true. You can’t put the magic smoke back in.
5319089
Absolutely willing to take a look at whatever, yeah! Shoot me the link and I'll see if anything seems ungeniune.
5319029
I don't want to say that the Amish are really onto something (though Lord knows I think it often enough), but I think if tech went back to, at, 2008 levels, it wouldn't be the worst thing.
5319071 Yeah I think it is T-IV. Been a while, though. I only ever bought fluid for the first Prius I did, and that was years ago. After I learned what's inside it, there's really no reason for me to go out of my way to buy special fluid. Especially considering that even the specified atf is just run-of-the-mill stuff, not some special low conductivity oil or anything. I'd also imagine conductivity of the oil might be an issue, but since their engineers took no notable precautions, and there's nothing special about the oil, I'm gonna say it's not a big issue. I suppose it could be if the oil was completely filled with shavings. But then, I don't think there's a whole lot of exposed electrical wires inside. Probably just a bit of the ends of the windings as they go to the big connectors to the outside world. Even though it's like 400v, maybe it's less of an issue because it's AC? idk.
Can't rightly remember if it had a screen. It does have a pump, but it's tiny and for lubrication only. Chain driven, IIRC. If it does have a screen, it's nothing big like a real trans filter. Probably more like a pickup tube.
5319074 lol who're they pairing up with now? Some French company? It's some French company, isn't it?
5318451 Broken link :(
5319037
Sure thing. I love discussing esoteria even when I'm not the most useful for specific stuff.
5319078
...Huh.
...Is there a church nearby? I think I recall... [does quick seach] Ah, yes. So maybe something like that?
Ah, well, glad it's not definitely worse, at least.
:)
edit:
5319049
"Also, from personal experience, some older engines worked perfectly well while on fire."
Oh? :D
5319325
The imgur link? Odd, works fine for me, I even opened it in a completely different browser not logged into imgur or anything and it opened just fine for me? I'll try embedding it and seeing if that works any better maybe. 🤷
(Looks like the embed is working right in the comment preview, at least...)
i.imgur.com/qNxjPsO.jpg
5319409 Works. Definitely a valve body plate. Can't rightly say which one, but if you have it apart, it will become obvious. Actually that does look like the old book I have. Not sure.
5319325
if it's saying "access denied" for some reason, delete the "i." in the address bar so the link is imgur.com/ instead of i.imgur.com/. no clue what the problem was or why that fixes it, but it does.
I'm a Trader Joe's regular (well, pre-COVID; now I live on Safeway drive-up-and-go) and happy to help review; no knowledge of Twitch to speak of, though.
5319205
If there was a zombie apocalypse, the Amish would be the last to know.
I really wish I knew more about them, because I have a desire to write a story where Applejack just shows up at an Amish farm and they take it in stride. Or an Amish person shows up in Ponyville, gets to work on a farm, and that’s that. Probably all the earth ponies respect them for their hard work.
5319323
That’s the problem--the shavings. Don’t change it enough, and it gets electrically conductive to the point that the car thinks there’s a voltage leak and won’t go. Or you wind up shorting something that you shouldn’t. That’s never going to be a problem in a run-of-the-mill trans; by the time you’ve got enough metal in the fluid that the internal wiring/components have electrical issues, you’re already well past the point of no return with physical wear issues.
Yeah, I think it’s just the brushes and commutators (I think that’s the part I’m thinking of) that’s exposed, but that’s enough.
Of course it’s a French company. They’re probably pining for the Renault days, but of course Renault will have nothing to do with them any more (a lover scorned and all that), so instead they’re getting in bed with Peugeot.
5319341
There is not a church nearby. Just an international airport. And a field, on the other side of the tracks.
My old Chevy C/10 with a 250 inline 6 drove for a mile or two with the carburetor on fire. I didn’t know it was on fire, just that the truck was acting weird and smelled kind of funny. When I got to my destination, I popped open the hood to see if I could figure out what the issue was, and the fire was a good clue. Luckily, it was winter, so I tossed some snow on it to put it out, and aside from having to repair two wires and replace the choke spring, it was fine.
5319486
Alright! I’ll send you a link via PM! (it’s not complete, but if I don’t do it now, I won’t remember
)
5320975
"There is not a church nearby. Just an international airport. And a field, on the other side of the tracks."
...Welp, I don't know, then. Huh.
"I popped open the hood to see if I could figure out what the issue was, and the fire was a good clue"
I'm guessing not the most subtle piece of evidence you've ever spotted in your time as a mechanic, yeah. :D
"Luckily, it was winter, so I tossed some snow on it to put it out"
:D
(Reminds me of one time we were running the induction furnace when there was snow on the ground outside, the cooling tank needed a refill, and I realized that we had a limited-time but ample supply of water that was a: conveniently hand-portable, no container required and no significant risk of spilling it onto something and b: extra cold.
Though, fortunately, the induction furnace was not actually on fire. :D)
Thanks for the story, and nicely done during the incident, it sounds like. :)