Fic recs, March 9th: Landon edition! · 5:41pm Mar 9th, 2020
This month's Flash Fiction Online includes making cosmetics for queens, the truth behind fairy tales, what to do when the well runs dry, and Hansel's return. So, mostly fairy tale fanfic. :B Also, does anyone go check these out when I talk about them?
The next reader to get the reader edition treatment is the erstwhile WhoLandon, now known as Disaster Factory. According to a video posted back in 2015, he cleared out all his Landon-related internet activities but couldn't bring himself to take down the channel. He's stopped reading pony stuff, switching to SCPs in the last few years, which is a shame since he'll likely never finish Letters from a Friend at the End of the World. :B But, he's left us with a ton of content, and enough to actually do a whole review blog dedicated to him. :D
List of previously reviewed readings:
RBDash47's Old Friends
Filler's Fluttershy Gets a Papercut
Paradigm Shine's The Last Crusade
Alexstrazsa's The Princess and the Pupil
Chromosome's Pinkie Pie Is Dead
Skywriter's Sun Princess
Drakkith's How to Preen Your Chicken
Lurks-No-More's Sometimes a Popsicle Is Just a Popsicle
AlexMagnet's Twilight Sparkle, M.D.
Aragon's Daring DONE!
PonyTom's Twilight Eats a Hamburger
Between Lines's TWILIGHT SPARKLE FIXES EVERYTHING
Skywriter's Martial Bliss
Draconian Soul's He'll Never Leave Me
Obselescence's In Memory Of
getmeouttahere's Birthday Present
Violetta Strings's An Adventure Through the Overflowingly Wordy Psyche of the Fair Princess Celestia
Argembarger's The Spiderses
Terrasora's Dearest Fluttershy
Now to the rest!
H: 1 R: 2 C: 7 V: 2 N: 4
Discord at Death's Bed - Goodbye Fluttershy by palelordhiphis
Reading
Reading by BigAshRandomVids
Genre: Sad
Discord says farewell to his only friend.
Given the title, I was actually surprised when there were more characters in this than just Discord and Fluttershy. I was even further surprised at Discord's attitude toward Celestia. I appreciate that this was very much "Fluttershy's long-lived friends say goodbye to her", that was an interesting way to take the story. Otherwise, it's a fairly standard, very season 3 piece about Discord at Fluttershy's deathbed, but at least it didn't try to flog the feels button.
Recommended If You Like Sadfics
The Baffling Case of Pinkamena Pie by Don Quixote
Reading
Genre: Comedy
Twilight's childhood hero comes to Ponyville to study Pinkie Pie's strange abilities.
It's been a while since I read something episode-like, so I found this overall a pleasant surprise. That said, three issues. First, despite there having been three seasons' worth of episodes released when this story came out, it assumes the reader has never seen a one of them and needs to be told in great detail about common settings and characters. Two, the plot is basically Feeling Pinkie Keen, as Twilight tries to dissuade the aforementioned childhood hero from overdoing it on the study, with plenty of references to that episode. A shame, since given how much of a dick this guy is, I was expecting more of a "don't meet your heroes" message. Third, the scene near the end where each of Pinkie's friends enters, demonstrates their predominant character trait, and name-drops their Element. <.< You don't get that much anymore, either. Still, this was a nice bit of fun, and it even had some good fourth wall jokes!
Recommended If You Don't Mind the Overexplaining
A Mother's Work Is Never Done by Dubs Rewatcher
Reading
Genre: Slice of Life
Derpy's tired after a long day, but Dinky wants to play. Derpy would do anything for her muffin.
You know what's hard? Being a parent. You know what's really hard? Being a single parent. This is a slice in the day of life for Derpy and Dinky, where Dinky's, well, a five-year-old, hard to manage, full of life and energy and wants, and Derpy is a fucking saint who deserve a medal because she's such a good pony, you guys. ;_; This was great, from start to finish, building to a head of drama before releasing the valve for all the adorable feels. I loved this.
Highly Recommended
Monster by Mr Stargazer
Reading
Reading by Tankulis Prime
Reading by Crafty Arts
Genre: Dark HiE
Gee, with 26k views and over a thousand likes, I could've done a vs. post on this one, save that I've never heard of it before. :O It got off to a bad start by suggesting our requisite human in Equestria has turned on ponykind because Luna wouldn't bang him, but after that I could see why people like this. I mean, the idea of a human going to Equestria and finding out he's immortal could present a huge story opportunity all by itself, but quickly after that tidbit is dropped, we find out Russell (god, why is his name Russell?) is actually becoming something sinister. And that's a pretty neat concept, too. All told, this would have been a more satisfying read of either idea had it been longer, but given its age, it was probably a first-out-of-the-gate kind of thing, so it's not bad.
Recommended for HiE Fans
Luna's Hearth's Warming Eve by Rainboom_Flash
Reading
Genre: Sad Luna
Alone on the moon, Luna watches her former subjects enjoy a holiday.
Boy, this one really lays it on thick. I'd be more negative about it if the writing weren't pretty decent, but it's packed with melodrama and ends on a tragic note for… reasons, I guess. I dunno, I just wasn't into it, but you could read far worse, especially with that genre tag.
Vaguely Recommended
Luna Drops the Soap by Drakkith
Reading
Genre: Luna vs.
Things spiral out of control from there.
There's nothing inherently wrong with this story, but I've been rather over its type for a long time now. It's one of those comedies that spirals incomprehensibly out of control in wild and unpredictable ways that just don't fit together. The whole joke is "look at how crazy this shit is!" but that is not sufficient, at least in this case, for humor. I mean, I won't say not to read it, but the only thing I laughed at was a guard's name.
Not Recommended
Corn on the Cob by mushrumluver
Reading
Genre: Pony Does X
Cadence eats corn.
Boy, we're just going back over all the old memes, here. First problem with this is you can watch the entire (extremely goofy) 16-second Youtube video linked at the start and get the gist of 90% of the story. There's no deviation, this is a novelized Youtube video that isn't even half a minute long. :/ Second problem is it feels slapdash, and probably was. Some weird turns of phrase and editing mistakes that… Look, the author obviously didn't put a lot of effort into this, all but admits it, and it shows.
Not Recommended
Welcome to Night Vale by Journeyman
Reading (part 1)
Reading by the Author
Wow, the last thing I expected in this blog was to be reviewing another reader! This is his only reading, and as it was done five years ago, there's likely no chance he'll do anything else. But he did a great job with the production. This is definitely how you should experience chapter 3 of this story.
Genre: Night Vale Crossover
Huh, and I just read iisaw's Night Vale crossover, too. The funny thing is that one's called Pony Vale but is distinctly "Night Vale with ponies", while transports the town of Night Vale and all its trappings to an Equestrian setting. And they're both as good as each other, both embracing well the writing style and tropes of the web series. This one's got a lot more pony memes in it, but if anything, that helps the two otherwise tonally disparate IPs meld. This was darkly funny and had a really surprising plot. I will give this the same rating I gave its twin.
Recommended for Night Vale Fans
Ah'll Protect You by LilSane
Reading
Review #6300!
Genre: HiE
Applejack discovers how much Equestria's newest resident needs her protection.
This is a pretty unusual HiE, as things go. Sadly, a large part of that is simply that our human is female; nevermind that some of the best HiEs I've ever read star women, they're far and away not the majority. Aside from that, AJ is a surprising choice for this role, and she fills it well. The Romance tag is maybe overselling things a bit, but it's nevertheless a valid lens through which to interpret the emotions underlying Applejack's actions. I felt the ending was a little abrupt, but this nevertheless might be worth checking out even if you normally wouldn't.
Recommended If You're Okay With Humans in Equestria
Sacrifice by Karrakaz
Reading
Genre: Shipping Drama
After that first Nightmare Night in Ponyville, it was only natural that Luna should fall for Twilight Sparkle.
The only reason I listened to this is it was on my RIL, and the only reason it was on my RIL is, I have to assume, that I wasn't paying close attention to the description when I watched Karrakaz. But, despite winning a Twilestia contest, this gave me a lot more to be interested in than I anticipated. To be fair, that 'lot more' was entirely the "royal sisters fighting over Twilight" first half; I was far less interested in Luna trying to get Celestia to follow her heart. Still, the titular sacrifice fits Luna's character, so I can probably see why this won.
Recommended Only If You Like Twilestia
Humanity's Greatest Pastime by soulpillar
Reading
Genre: HiE Comedy
Computers and the internet have been a boon to accelerating human/pony relations. But there are some things the Equestrians must never find out.
From the start, I pretty much knew where this was going. The outright mention of 'war' being the ponies' 15th-largest search term threw me, but only a little. Still, this was funny, and written well, with a strong voice for our first-person narrator. The final punchline is maybe a little weak, but that's fine, it's not what you're here for. I was amused.
Recommended If You Like HiE
You're Doing It Wrong by Abydos
Reading
Genre: Random Comedy
Someone thinks Twilight is using her books improperly.
So I guess the point of this is meta-commentary on… something in this community, most likely reviewers and/or people who leave critique in comments. But this isn't clear, and the comments only go so far in clearing it up. Really, this is a story about some random OC being a jerk to Twilight and never quite getting to explain his actions. It doesn't work as a story, and thanks to writing, falls short in the meta element. The title thus becomes exceedingly ironic.
Not Recommended
I'd Do Her by Fire Gazer the Alchemist
Reading
Genre: Comedy
An offhanded comment turns into a dare.
Writers take note: If you want to write a story about Rainbow Dash being an incorrigible shithead, here's how you do it and have it be funny. Not a laugh-a-minute per se, but full of excellent humor and a Rainbow (and Applejack) you just want to smack, already. There are some shippy notes about this, but mostly, it's actually friendshipping, bringing Rainbow into a better understanding of Rarity's world despite the former's mind being on sex the entire time. And, no spoiler, I like how this turned out, because it could have easily sent a really poor message. And hey, I get to read the sequel soon!
Recommended
Ghost Nappa Haunts a Unicorn by Amante
Reading
Genre: Dragon Ball Z Crossover/Parody
This is not in any way offensive, but it's also a very standard kind of "X goes to Equestria" story. I'll admit, I only got some of the jokes from having seen Dragon Ball Abridged, but I laughed at very few of them. This was far less funny than I think the author wanted it to be.
Vaguely Recommended
I'd Kiss Her by Fire Gazer the Alchemist
Reading
Sequel to I'd Do Her
Genre: Shipping Dramedy
After Rainbow's revenge prank goes too far, she and Rarity try to make things right between Twilight and Applejack.
This picks up literally right after the last story ended, so make sure you read that one first. I'd say it's a better story on just about every merit, though the ironic thing is, this having more shipping means less people will want to read it. Still, I was very pleased by Rarity's part; it's almost refreshing to see her written as actually knowledgeable about romance and not just a doe-eyed waif bamboozled by novel writers, even if Rainbow had one or two useful ideas of her own. I don't think I'll ever get over "space crap". :)
Recommended
Dear Princess Celestia by MLP-Person
Reading
Genre: Princess/Immortality Angst
I could go into a rant about making Twilight immortal just so she can be angry at Celestia for making her watch all her friends die. But everything you need to know about this can be summed up as "Rainbow Dash had no family, and Scootaloo couldn't have flown up there if she tried". XD What a crack, that's just awful, give me a break. I can see why this was deleted. What a way to end things.
Not Recommended
Pee Pee, you should probably have a Patreon link in your user description.
5216782
It's more trouble than it's worth. :/
Holy cow,
This is the most touching and incredibly detailed thing I've ever had done for anything lol. Maybe I should revive the old channel, got caught up in adult life and work. Rebranded but left sitting.
I miss the old ponyfic reading days, I still read a dozen a week, just dont record them.
10/10 though for feels. I can't believe how long it's been. But hey, I'll be at Trottcon this year so maybe I'll relive a bit of the old days.
5217022
I'll see ya there. :)
(No but definitely finish the one that's still unfinished. I left a comment on your channel a little while ago! ;D)
5216932
Then make one of us do it for you :V
5217138
It's not the patreon per se, but the draconian tax laws. :( Can't really pay an accountant when you're making less than $200 a month.
5217089
Oh so many chapters...
Alright no promises but I think I can manage that.