Hands Short: The Other Mare · 2:49pm Nov 18th, 2019
The early morning quiet is the perfect time for Fluttershy to go out and feed the chickens... Which is then shattered by the loud roar of an engine. Fluttershy jumps and hides under a bush, as Shepherd pulls up on a motorcycle.
Shepherd: "Damnit, I hit the gas again by mistake... Fluttershy?"
Fluttershy: "Ah... y-Y-Yes?"
Shepherd: "I'm sorry about that, still trying to figure out how to ride this beautiful girl."
Fluttershy: "This... This... Th-Girl?!"
Shepherd: "Yeah! Isn't she gorgeous? She's a Honda! Found her in the human archives, took a while to fix her up. But now I'm going to ride her everywhere!"
Fluttershy: "..." *Sobs* "HOW COULD YOU?!"
Shepherd: "Hwah?"
Fluttershy: "WITHOUT EVEN ASKING TWILIGHT?! OR ME?! Y-Y-YOU... YOU MEANIE!" *She hid in her cottage and slammed the door*
Shepherd: "Huh?! Wait, Fluttershy, it's not like that!"
Fluttershy: "TELL AHONDA SHE'S A SLUT AND HOMEWRECKER!"
Shepherd: "Hoo boy... This is a fun start to the day..."
Yeah f@#$ honda who ever that B@#$% is!!!
Ah, the risks of anthropomorphizing beloved possessions.
And seriously, Shepherd, where are you going to go? Equestrian roads range from dirt to cobblestones.
Wait until he brings home some roombas.
Shepherd rubbed the back of his neck. Two hours later, and Fluttershy was still refusing to answer the door. Behind it, he could hear the sound of muffled sobbing, and he had noticed a very hairy, decidedly ursine face staring out the window at him.
He had sheepishly waved at it.
It had not waved back.
He would have liked to say that it had smiled at him, but he was fairly sure that a bear showing its teeth was not a friendly gesture even in this world.
"Man...this stinks..."
"I'll say!"
He jumped. "What the-!"
Beside him, a slender Unicorn mare wearing a press hat and levitating a notepad and pen with a mint-green field stood, casting a critical eye over him.
Shepherd blinked. "Uh...hi?"
The dun mare smiled broadly, tipping her hat in greeting. "Hello, yourself! Scoop's the name, Juicy Scoop, ace reporter for the Canterlot Chronicle!"
"Nice...to meet you, Ms. Scoop. I'm-"
"Please, call me Scoop. Went by Juicy for a while, but after the fifth restraining order, I started going by Scoop." She shook her head, replacing her hat on her yellow mane. "Stallions. Never can think past the ol' mating season."
Scoop brightened up immediately. "And I know who you are, Mr. Shepherd! Famous talking pet monkey of Twilight Sparkle!"
He grit his teeth a bit at that. "I'm not-"
"So tell me," the reporter said, licking the tip of her pen. "Is it true that you married your motorcycle?"
My mind came back to this a few hours later when I realized that Fluttershy must have thought that first loud noise was a fart, right?
LOL! I can only imagine the kind of vindictives Shephard would get if a piece of the Human Archives revealed an artifical intelligence with a female voice- and a holographic avatar shaped like a human woman. Hells, Twilight might teleport to the peak of Mt. Doom…