Breakdown Cruise · 6:00am Jul 26th, 2019
So, I'm going to Bronycon this year! My schedule of events is below, along with some little stories.
Once, a GM ran a Star Trek based campaign for me and a few friends. It was about the heroic crew of the last Oberth class science vessel in all of Starfleet. That class was considered out of date during Kirk's era, so by the time of TNG, we're flying a ship that should be in a museum.
He opened every session with this title crawl:
Space: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Wei Shen. For fifty years, it has explored strange new worlds and sought out new life and new civilizations.
It has sailed so far that its warp drives no longer align. It has done battle with enemies so fierce that the scars remain on its hull. It has been home to so many heroes that the floors are worn smooth by the passage of their feet.
And now, as you try to coax the warp core to life, as you struggle to get the lights to stop flickering, as you listen to the engineers cursing the obsolete computer, you realize it is time for your mission to begin. It is time for the Wei Shen to boldly go where no man has gone before.
One last time.
The last Bronycon is upon us. It's going to be great.
Writing Comedy: How to Make Your Horses Hilarious
Hall of the Moon
Thursday, 2:30 PM to 3:30 PM
"Oh my," said Rarity. "This is shocking. Terrifying, even. A mare who resembles me in all regards, save for a dark disposition. A black mirror to all my faults. An evil clone, if you will. Why in all my days as bearer of one of the Elements of Harmony, this is the first time I have ever encountered such a thing."
Rarity paused for a moment to inspect her hoof polish. "I expect you'll start monologuing soon?"
Other Rarity sneered and reached a hoof up to her head, brushing back her mane. She kept it in the punk style, short and spiky. "Oh, I'm no evil clone. I'm just a young mare trying to find her way in the world. Really, I'm a fan of your work. I'm named after you."
"How creative. Were you conjured by some sorcerer? Cloned in a lab?"
"Oh, you misunderstand," Other Rarity said, her tone turning sickly sweet. "My parents named me after you when I was born."
Rarity paused a moment, looking up from her hoof. "That seems unlikely."
"Oh, no." Other Rarity grinned ear to ear, her expression absolutely delighted. "They were honored! You saved their lives, you know, that one summer day. You thwarted Nightmare Moon, and saved all of Equestria, including a certain stallion and his pregnant wife. It was the least they could do to name their child after you."
"But that was..." Rarity paused. "No."
"It was sixteen years ago," Other Rarity's tone picked up a cruel edge.
"No." Rarity took a step back. "No!"
"That's right. I'm named after you, and I'm sixteen." Other Rarity grinned, her eyes wide and manic. "I'm sixteen." Her voice rose to a shout. "And you're past thirty!"
The ponies of Ponyville gasped. Rarity clutched her heart, screamed, and fainted on the spot.
Seeing Through Your Characters’ Eyes II: The Finer-er Points of Perspective
Hall of the Moon
Friday, 9:15 PM to 10:15 PM
If your idea of an exciting Friday evening is attending a discussion panel on the advantages of first person vs third person narrators in the context of character-driven narratives, this is the event for you!
And if you don't think that's exciting, I'm sorry, we can't be friends. This is what matters to me now.
Original Characters IV: Beyond Equestria
Hall of the Moon
Friday, 11:15 AM to 12:15 PM
I need to be straight with you, we've been intentionally handing out bad advice for the last three years.
I mean, Original Characters I, II, and III were basically just chaff. Distractions. You don't think the art of writing good OCs has changed in the last four years, do you? You don't think those red and black alicorns just happen on their own? No, they don't. We made them happen, so there would always be a steady stream of people with bad OCs coming to our talks. We are the conspiracy.
But now that Bronycon is over, I guess we might as well give you the real advice. Original Characters IV: When We Stop Fucking With You.
I mean, god, we actually said characters should have flaws. And you believed us!
It's in Our Hooves Now: The Importance of Fanfiction After the Series Ends
Hall of the Stars
Saturday, 11:30 PM to 12:30 AM
Without fanfiction people will have to go back to reading Fifty Shades of Grey and nobody wants that.
Distant Worlds: Writing for Non-MLP Settings
Hall of the Stars
Saturday, 12:45 AM to 1:45 AM
Turns out when you're writing Star Wars fanfiction you can't just have winged horses show up and talk without explaining it.
Seriously though, we've got a ton of great content for this panel. We've got notes on worldbuilding, tips and tricks, and even a few stories we're going to show snapshot of during the talk. I know the timeslot is a little rough, but the 1 to 5 people who attend are going to have a fantastic time.
Who are your fellow panelists for each of these?
Really wish BC would list all the panelists for each panel on the schedule...
re that old campaign:
Heh, neat.
re the Rarities story:
Hah! :D
re the others:
:)
[notes down panels]
Right, don't know how scheduling conflicts will work out for those (...Why is my so far most major discovered conflict for a 0045 timeslot? Why are not just one but two things I really want to attend scheduled for the same 0045 timeslot?! Aaaaaargh!), but thanks for the list. :)
(And looking through the schedule, already found another conflict (though not with these). Sigh... It is the way of conventions.)
Anyway, looking forward to it, and seeing you there!
5094401
"Distant Worlds", according to my notes, also features The Hat Man and Wanderer D, though I'm not sure if that's the whole lineup.
edit:
....Also I just looked back at the Rarities story and laughed again. :D
edit2:
...And got the meaning of the blog post title just as I was closing the tab. :D
These all sound awesome. Wish I could make it to Distant Worlds, but the meat body demands some degree of sleep.
Yes, but you CAN do it.
Alone, freezing to death and unable to move was not how Luke Skywalker had planned to spend his day. He should have been despondent with the hopeless situation he was in, far away from the rebel base with nobody to rescue him, but he refused to give up. He had managed to get away from the ferocious beast in the ice cave by using his rudimentary Jedi power and his father's lightsabre, so all he needed to do was get up...
"Luke," called out a familiar voice. It could not be real. The subzero storm sweeping in would have prevented the base from sending anybody out to save him. And yet...
"Ben?" he managed to wheeze while looking at the impossible figure a few feet away, glowing softly in the fading twilight.
"You must go to the Eqquis system," said the blurred image of Ben Kenobi. "There, you will learn the ways of the Force, from the one master who taught us all over a thousand years ago."
"B-but what about Yoda?" gasped Luke.
"He held out for too much money," said the ghost of his old friend. "Remember, Master Celestia will guide your steps, but beware of the dark side."
"The Dark Side of the Force?" managed Luke.
"No, the Dark Side of the Horse," said Ben. "Luna's a hopeless flirt. Look, it will make more sense after you get covered in animal guts. Your friend is almost here, so make sure to hold your nose."
5094561
"But why do I want to avoid her? She's cute."
"Look, I know she seems like the mare of your dreams, but she's got a lot going on and you want none of it. She's the reason 'Lunatic' means 'crazy.'"
"How is she in bed?"
"Luke..." 😐
(I was expecting "Luke, you're just like your father.)
5094585 Yeah, this is an idea that popped up during EFNW this year, and I swear I can make it epic. Celestia/Luna as Jedi masters, Twilight as the frustrated student who can't believe her mentor held *that* lesson back, the Dark Sith Lord Chrysalis and her scheming to steal Twilight away and turn her to the Dark Side. I may just stagger into the oh-god-early-in-the-morning thing just to bounce ideas off people. :)
5094561
the-dad.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2015/11/tauntaun2.jpg
Do you know if any of these are gonna be filmed or recorded to youtube? If not, is there some way to ask about or arrange it?
5095239
I second that! I can't make the con - where do I throw my money to see these panels?
5095239
5095324
Bronycon does put them up on YouTube eventually, but it can take months after the con. :(
5095329 5095324 5095239 The Royal Canterlot Library has the There Can Only Be One panel, recorded by yours truely.