Friendship is Card Games: The Washouts · 11:17am Sep 9th, 2018
Wherein Scootaloo decides it’s long past time she made some puberty-grade bad decisions.
Nice to see the Rainbow Dash fanclub is still a thing. Dash peeking in on every meeting is more than a little creepy and self-aggrandizing, but I can’t say I’m too surprised.
It’s Dash’s worst nightmare, her number one fan moving on to other fandoms interests. Wait, no, it’s literally a new fandom. And of course the Bearer of Loyalty can’t countenance someone looking to put their devotion elsewhere.
“Twenty bajillion percent cooler!” 
In the corner, Nick. You know what you did.
Dash apparently makes for a good Metal Gear protagonist when she’s shocked.
I do love how Dash’s relationship with Scootaloo blurs the line between older sister and mother. Seriously, that filly’s triggering Dash’s maternal instincts something awful, especially this episode… though that really highlights the absence of any other guardians for Scootaloo, whether they be her Schrödingerian parents or the aunts mentioned in some of the chapter books.
The knowing looks the rest of the Mane Six give each other as Dash airs her concerns are amazing. “Oh, Rainbow…”
Applejack may have grown to accept pears in light of her grandfather, but bananas are right up there with strawberries on the list of heretical fruit.
Dash immediately declaring the Washouts a Wonderbolt ripoff on the flimsiest of pretexts is honestly kind hilarious on a meta level. Hatedom is a powerful thing.
What does one look for when evaluating confetti by taste?
It was clear where this episode was going to go based on the Washouts’ motto. “Leap before you look” indeed.
Really says something when the announcer is more safety conscious than the leader of the team, huh?
Speaking of whom, did the Washouts’ announcer get kicked out of the ‘Bolts as well?
Interesting body type diversity among the Washouts. Heck, we’ve even seen Short Fuse before he washed out. He was one of the trainees back in “Top Bolt.” Meanwhile, Rolling Thunder seems to be the Australian pegasus answer to Tempest Shadow. Dark purple coat, scars over one eye, taller than average? All she’s missing is an amputated wing and a legion of loyal yetis. Heck, Short Fuse may qualify as her tiny comic relief sidekick.
Also, ponies have an area that’s developed an Australian accent… though by the same token, the Apples’ accent hasn’t ever been explained, so make of that what you will. 
I wonder if Short Fuse is at all related to pony Sour Sweet, especially since he's working with original-model Indigo Zap.
Scootaloo channeled my usual Civilization playstyle: “You’re both awesome! I bet we can gain so much from each other aaaaand you’ve declared war on each other. And you both want me to join in.” Of course, she didn’t then proceed to lever a tech advantage into conquering the others, so it isn’t quite one-to-one. 
Also, shouldn’t Scoots recognize Lightning Dust given her exhaustive knowledge of Dash’s life from “Parental Glideance”? I wouldn’t think she’d go through the “learn it for the report, then forget it” thing for matters of Dashology.
I was honestly really happy to see Lightning get along with Dash. There are no hard feelings since she’s much happier in the Washouts than she’d be in the ‘Bolts. I knew it wouldn’t last, but it was still heartwarming for as long as it did.
The Wonderbolt-Washout conflict is very much red-white, irrespectively. It’s a question of risky freedom versus stifling security. Granted, “stifling” in this case means “stifling the kind of creativity that gets you killed,” but this is one of those times where white’s in the right.
Dash just can’t bear to see someone turn from the path that led to her own success. Especially not if it puts someone she loves at obvious risk.
Spitfire was hilarious, both in the sheer quantity of drill sergeant momentum making her unload on Dash and the constant refrain of living in a van down by the river ending up in a full body cast and drinking through a straw.
Dash saying “my fault” after a crash is a wonderful understated demonstration of her growth over the series. As is the fact that she only crashed while distracted.
I was thinking about Scootaloo’s flight issues, but hearing her call it out explicitly, especially with no one even entertaining the possibility she might get airborne one day… Yeah, that hurt.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Liquid fuel rockets? Granted, those are older than you might think—the first one was launched in 1926—but that thing looks like Lightning got it from Trixie’s back alley fireworks shop. The fact that it’s held together with duct tape only adds to my concern.
On the other hand, Changeling Space Program just got a bit more canon.
It’s interesting to note that along with “Somepony to Watch Over Me” and “Forever Filly,” this completes a trilogy of the Crusaders chafing under their older sisters. Except in this one, the other Crusaders offer no input. Indeed, where are Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom in all of this? I don’t expect those three to be attached at the hip at all times, but I’d think they’d merit some degree of input in this situation, or at least watch Scootaloo’s performance.
Going back to “Parental Glideance,” there isn’t too much difference between the rocket sled and Scootaloo’s Cloudsdale launch, beyond questions of thrust. Granted, those are pertinent questions, given how we never see the rocket sled land.
“Welcome to the first ever meeting of the newest fan club for the awesomest, previously under-appreciated pony in Ponyville!”
Ditzy Doo?
Also, nice to see that Scootaloo’s fan club also gets a horrific balloon animal representation of its subject. For a given value of “nice.” It’s much nicer to see Dash’s parents get involved… though that only highlights Scootaloo’s lack of visible parents or parental equivalents.
In all, I enjoyed this one. It’s nice to see Scootaloo spread her underdeveloped wings and step a bit out of Dash’s shadow. As for Lightning Dust, as I said earlier, I’m not surprised. She clearly didn’t learn the lesson some set out for her in “Wonderbolts Academy” if her reaction was to create a team that agreed with her initial philosophy.
Now, let’s see how many of these cards are too dangerous to see print. Bear in mind that there are a few mechanical spoilers for Guilds of Ravnica in here:
Full Body Cast 2W
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has indestructible and can’t attack or block.
”You’d think I wouldn’t have to tell such a patient not to go anywhere. That’s pegasi for you.”
—Aorta Redheart, registered nurse
Wonderbolt Discipline 3W
Instant
Untap all creatures you control. Those creatures get +1/+3 until end of turn.
”We only accept the best of the best. Then we train them until we can tack a few more ‘of the best’s on top of that.”
—Spitfire, Wonderbolt captain
Touch the Sky U
Instant
Target creature gains flying until end of turn.
Jump-start (You may cast this spell from your graveyard by discarding a card in addition to paying its others costs. Then exile this card.)
One taste of freedom is never enough.
Meeting Adjourned UUU
Instant
Counter all abilities. Return all other spells to their owners’ hands.
”See you all next week. We can discuss your business then.”
Hovering Observer 2U
Creature — Pegasus Scout
Flying
You may look at the top card of your library. (You may do this at any time.)
“I’m just making sure all fan club meetings are up to code. There’s definitely a code for this somewhere.”
2/2
Patent Pending 2UU
Sorcery
Search your library for an artifact card and exile it with two time counters on it. If it doesn’t have suspend, it gains suspend. Then shuffle your library. (At the beginning of your upkeep, remove a time counter from that card. When the last is removed, play it without paying its mana cost. If it’s a creature, it has haste.)
Stunt Planning 2B
Sorcery
Surveil 2, then draw two cards. You lose 2 life. (To surveil 2, look at the top two cards of your library, then put any number of them into your graveyard and the rest on top of your library in any order.)
The Washouts put spectacle first and safety thirty-seventh.
Washout Coordinator 3B
Creature — Pegasus Advisor
Flying
Whenever another creature you control dies, surveil 1.
”Relax, you baby. Bones heal, and we’ll adjust the cannon power for the next trial.”
2/2
Rebellious Youth RR
Creature — Pegasus Child
Whenever Rebellious Youth becomes the target of a spell or ability, it deals 2 damage to that spell or ability’s controller.
”You’re not my mom.”
2/2
Anger Issues 2R
Enchantment — Aura
Flash
Enchant creature
Whenever enchanted creature is dealt damage, it deals that much damage to each other creature and each planeswalker.
A surprising number of ponies can guess Short Fuse’s name without being told.
Crushing Jaws 2R
Instant
Crushing Jaws deals 3 damage to any target. If that target is attacking or blocking, Crushing Jaws deals 5 damage to it instead.
”Timing is everything. Timing and life insurance.”
—Lightning Dust, Washout captain
Negative Role Model 3R
Creature — Pegasus Warrior
Flying
Mentor (Whenever this creature attacks, put a +1/+1 counter on target attacking creature with lesser power.)
Negative Role Model and each creature you control with power less than its power attack each combat if able.
3/2
Washout Recruitment 3R
Sorcery
Kicker 2B (You may pay an additional 2B as you cast this spell.)
Untap target creature. You gain control of that creature until end of turn. It gains haste until end of turn. If this spell was kicked, that creature also gains flying until end of turn and you sacrifice it at the beginning of the next end step.
Storm Roller 3RR
Creature — Pegasus Spellshaper
Flying
XRR, T, Discard a card: Storm Roller deals X damage divided as you choose among any number of targets.
Any pegasus can shove a cloud. Few can make true art out of them.
2/1
Apple Family Inquisitor 2G
Creature — Pony Cleric
Whenever an opponent casts a nongreen spell, put a +1/+1 counter on Apple Family Inquisitor.
”I’m not prejudiced. All other fruits are equally inferior to apples.”
2/2
Overcharged Boosters 2
Artifact — Equipment
Equipped creature gets +3/+0 and has trample.
At the beginning of your end step, destroy equipped creature.
Equip 2
”Trixie’s finest work! Wait, you’re using them to what!?”
—Trixie, to Lightning Dust
Washout Flight Suit 3
Artifact — Equipment
Equipped creature has “1, Sacrifice another creature: This creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn.”
Equip 0
”This isn’t what I meant by ‘fashion to die for.’”
—Rarity, Bearer of Generosity
Nightshade Abomination 7
Creature — Eldrazi Plant
Emerge 5G (You may cast this spell by sacrificing a creature and paying the emerge cost reduced by that creature’s converted mana cost.)
When you cast this spell, search your library for a basic land card and put it onto the battlefield tapped. Then shuffle your library.
4/3
Extreme Cupcakes BR
Enchantment — Cake
1BR, Sacrifice Extreme Cupcakes: All creatures get +3/-1 until end of turn.
”Of course I made enough for everypony. Why wouldn’t I?”
—Pinkie Pie, Bearer of Laughter
Reckless Endangerment BR
Instant
Target creature gets +2/-2 and gains first strike and haste until end of turn.
”If I can’t live on the edge, what’s the point of living?”
—Rolling Thunder, Washout stuntpony
Old Rivalry 1BR
Sorcery
Return a creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield, then target opponent returns a creature card from their graveyard to the battlefield. If two creatures are put onto the battlefield this way, those creatures fight each other.
No score can stay unsettled forever.
Harsh Experience 2(bg)
Instant
Undergrowth — If B was spent to cast this spell, up to one creature gets -X/-X until end of turn, and if G was spent to cast this spell, up to one target creature gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the number of creature cards in your graveyard. (Do both if BG was spent.)
Washout Squad 3BR
Creature — Pegasus Warrior
Flying
Unleash (You may have this creature enter the battlefield with a +1/+1 counter on it. It can’t block as long as it has a +1/+1 counter on it.)
When Washout Squad enters the battlefield, each player sacrifices a creature with power less than Washout Squad’s power.
3/3
I Don't Have To Save You (wb)
Instant
Prevent all damage target creature or planeswalker would take this turn. Damage another target creature or planeswalker takes can't be prevented this turn.
As Lightning Dust entered the stratosphere, her mood did not improve when it dawned on her she was literally being hoisted by her own petard.
Whoa! :O Good catch! I still don't like him. :B
I understood that reference. XD
>Surveil
And Dimir takes the mill bullet again.
Favorite out of this batch is Negative Role Model.
I really liked the idea that this episode introduced of a team for outcasts and misfits, and I'd love to see if the fandom will make anything of it, because I don't think the show was interested in exploring much of that angle. For me, the episode fell flat at the end by just straight-up making Lightning Dust the villain, when there's actually a lot that a team like this could offer.
Also I was very pleased to see Dash's parents at the end, because it's nice continuity and their Scootaffection is adorable. ^^
Or announcing school, maybe.
Since when is Cake an enchantment subtype?
This was a solid episode. I think I enjoyed it more than some people because I had zero expectations about Lightning Dust. I was honestly happy that she had no hard feelings toward Rainbow - at least initially - and that she had made her own career for herself. Of course, she took it too far when she put a child in danger, but I kind of expected that, too. This is the same pony who didn't care that her tornado almost killed a few civilians. Maybe the ending of this episode will finally teach her a lesson. My headcanon is that getting her leg tied to the rocket ended up putting her in a full body cast and forcing her to drink through a straw.
I saw some people in the episode thread questioning why Dash and Twilight would permit Scoots to ride on a giant missile, but my guess is that they didn't think they had the authority to stop her, since they're not her legal guardians or even her technical family.
Part of me is satisfied that the show even addressed the issue again, but yeah, it still hurts. Has anyone even tried asking the Pillar of Healing if she can do anything to help Scoots? Or hell, even Cattail.
4933761
I'm tempted to nitpick this—for one, red's the one who gets unpreventable damage—but I have to appreciate the flavor text. Shame on me for not making that reference myself.
4933769
To be honest, the only reason I made that catch was by browsing Short Fuse's character tag on Derpibooru.
4933797
First one I made. Mentor really brought together the flavor of a bad influence who your creatures can outgrow... if they survive.
And surveil definitely has its uses. The graveyard's much more accessible than the bottom of your library. Even in Limited, tossing jump-start cards into your graveyard is basically the same as drawing them.
4933814
Agreed. Lack of canonical depth does present a thick silver lining. Heck, I actually have an idea that's worth at least a few hundred words.
4933841
Since Seven-Layer Titan in FiCG: Friendship Games (a.k.a. the giant cake monster who covered all the cakes in the world with cake.) I made an entire Cake cycle in the card blog that covered the Celestia/Pinkie Friends Forever comic.
4933846
Meadowbrook helping Scoots does sound like an awesome idea. And at the very least, Lightning's hind leg got pulled out of its socket during the launch.
4933857
Ah. I don't follow the comics, so I skipped that one.
I've witnessed some threads on Derpibooru where people argue Rainbow's friends had it coming when they illegally entered military airspace, and that regret should not factor into if a character experiences redemptions or not—the show "owes" it to Lightning Dust to redeem her, preferably by not having her show an ounce of guilt at anything she's done.
I don't get some people.
I kinda want Full Body Cast to hit planeswalkers, but an indestructible planeswalker can't take infinite damage like a creature can, so it wouldn't be much help. Also, more spoilers have come out, and a Full-Body Cast-ed Niv-Mizzet, Parun would be great.
Touch the Sky is looking better than some of the actual cards with Jumpstart I've seen thus far (Looking at you, Direct Current. 1RR for 2 damage is unforgivable).
Meeting Adjourned has EDH written all over it.
Patent pending is nice, but way too slow to see tournament play.
Stunt Planning is a Surveil Read the Bones, but that's really "Draw four cards, Lose 2 life" to some decks.
Washout Coordinator is another EDH staple in the making.
Rebellious Youth basically reads "When your opponent kills this creature without combat damage, this deals 2 damage to them", but it's a 2/2 for 2, so still playable.
Anger Issues would be nuts with 2 of them on the field on indestructible creatures. I think it makes it a draw unless you can break the loop.
Crushing Jaws feels like it's edging towards white's color pie, but not enough that I think it breaks anything.
Negative Role Model is brilliant flavor and I love it.
Washout Recruitment feels more of a limited card, but I can see the appeal.
Storm Roller: I was around during Tempest. I recognize Rolling Thunder when I see it.
Apple Family Inquisitor is basically an inverted Titania's Chosen.
Overcharge Boosters is amazing on a regenerating/Indestructible 'til end of turn/indestructible creature, but that's to be expected.
Old Rivalry is nuts if you can get a big creature in your graveyard on turn 1 or 2, especially if you make sure not to kill any of their stuff.
Harsh Experience really ought to have (Do both if you paid BG) reminder text.
Still need to see the actual episode, but given all the spoilers... so, this is the one, huh? This is the one where they diagnose it and make it final? I've said before it's one of the few things that'd get me off the show entirely just on principle, but I can't help but think I'm going to see it and get nothing but pussyfooting around the issue as per usual.
If nothing else, they still have the option of sending Spike to Flight Camp with Scoots and Rumble. I doubt they'd pass that up so lightly.
Also, minor spoiler alert: I'm putting Starlight Glimmer on that Scootacapped subject in an upcoming fic. But in a roundabout way, I think you'll appreciate it.
4934829
The exact words from Scootaloo are "I can't fly." Not "I'll never fly," "I won't fly," or any other declaration of permanent, incurable disability... though in all honesty, it is implied somewhat in context. Personally, I'm not ruling it out for good just yet. It's not like we get any professional medical opinion.
4934835
Yeah, I've seen that clip (I thought there'd be more, though, was that all?) and... it's not definitive, I agree. Just annoying they keep doing it like that, is all, especially with the response it gets in the fandom. Again, it's the principle of the thing.
Still, StarLoo, coming to a fic near you. And maybe next Season, even, who knows.
Uhm... I can't help but wonder where in the episode an eldrazi burst out of anything.
So, what inspired that card?
4982019
When Short Fuse called a tomato sandwich "that abomination!" I will happily latch onto the slightest excuse for an interesting card concept.
(And remember, tomato plants are a nightshade.)
4982021
Ah. Lost in translation. Got it.