Friendship is Card Games: d20 Pony, Ch. 9, Pt. 1 · 11:39am April 14th
Goodness, it’s been almost two years since I last checked in on Trailblazer’s adventures. IDW putting out comics almost as quickly as I could review them will do that, especially given all of the G5 video media coming out concurrently.
As a quick reminder, d20 Pony is a comment-driven pixel art “quest” webcomic in the vein of Problem Sleuth and the earlier chapters of Homestuck (before a meteor hit the suggestion box.) Here there's a good deal of TTRPG influence to go with the text-based adventure interface and JRPG aesthetic, hence the name. Readers have guided Trailblazer, an earth pony with a talent for exploration, through finding love, a new home, a seed of the world-tree Yggdrassil, and more (in no particular order.) And when last we left her, she’d helped a reclusive society of bat ponies living in the caverns of the Everfree with a grootslang problem, reinforced by the militia of her new home. Also, Moonflower, her bat pony marefriend, is an oracle now and destined to bring her people back into larger Equestrian society lest doom befall all of equinity. It’s a whole thing.
And as part of that thing, the local town of Hoofington wants to invite the residents of Starfalls Town to the annual autumn festival… especially given the quake that wrecked Starfalls itself. This leads to a good old-fashioned fetch quest to get ingredients to cure the festival caterer’s feather flu, including a critical failure on an attempt to seduce Diamond Dogs that led to a beautiful “task failed successfully” moment and Trailblazer questioning her capabilities as a mare among mares. (Hey, when the comments keep suggesting "persuasion," some emergent character development is going to take place.) There's also some decent Zecora dialogue—I’ve certainly seen worse—and a cockatrice has an existential crisis.
That evening, Moonflower’s village accepts her as the new Oracle, and Luna herself comes to visit, participate in the oracular ritual as she did in times of old, and reveal that the magic of the night ponies is returning. Once all bat ponies could access dreams, as Moonflower can. Luna takes her on as her apprentice, and much will presumably develop from there.
Next time, the festival begins in earnest—and there's the matter of sourcing enough sunglasses and/or parasols for the bat ponies to enjoy the daytime festivities without getting blinded—but I try to take this comic one in-story day at a time. Given that, let’s see what I can make of this one:
Sun Bee Swarm W
Creature — Insect
Flying, lifelink
2R: Sun Bee Swarm gets +2/+0 until end of turn.
Some say the hives are the feral results of Celestia’s attempts to keep bees, citing the similar magics of both. The princess herself remains silent on the matter.
1/1
Covenant of the Hive 1W
Instant
Bargain (You may sacrifice an artifact, enchantment, or token as you cast this spell.)
You gain 6 life. If this spell was bargained, you can’t lose life this turn. (Damage causes loss of life.)
Celestia isn’t the only monarch to whom ponies owe their respect.
Everfree Dreamguard 2W
Creature — Bat Pegasus Cleric
Flying, ward 1, hexproof from black
Spells and abilities your opponents control can’t cause you to discard cards.
If a spell or ability an opponent controls causes you to discard Everfree Dreamguard, put it onto the battlefield instead of putting it into your graveyard.
2/2
Ridge Roc 6W
Creature — Bird
Flash
This spell costs 1 less to cast for each crime committed against you this turn. (Your opponents targeting you, anything you control, and/or cards in your graveyard is a crime against you.)
Flying
4/4
Bearer’s Bond 1U
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has ward 2.
Bearer’s Bond and other permanents attached to enchanted creature have hexproof.
Attuning to an ancient relic of awesome power comes with a few perks.
Quest for Components 1U
Enchantment
When Quest for Components enters the battlefield, reveal the top two cards of your library, note their names, then shuffle.
Whenever you play a card with one of the noted names, put a quest counter on Quest for Components.
Remove two quest counters from Quest for Components and sacrifice it: Draw four cards.
Unexpected Outcome 1U
Instant
The owner of target spell with mana value 1 or greater puts it on the bottom of their library, then discovers X, where X is its mana value. (They exile cards from the top of their library until they exile a nonland card with that mana value or less. They cast it without paying its mana cost or put it into their hand. They put the rest on the bottom in a random order.)
Dive into Dreams 3U
Instant
Draw a card.
Brainstorm (When you cast this spell, copy it for each card players have drawn this turn.)
“The collective unconscious is its own nightscape, with every star a dreamer.”
—Princess Luna
Luna’s Arrival 2B
Sorcery
Creatures you control get +X/+0 and gain menace until end of turn, where X is the number of creatures in your herd. (Your herd consists of up to one each of Bat, Pony, Pegasus, and Unicorn.)
“Beloved subjects. Despised adversaries. Well met, ye both.”
Zecora’s Insight 2B
Sorcery
Bargain
Target player loses 2 life. If this spell was bargained, you draw two cards. Otherwise, that player draws two cards.
Acrid fumes and frightening decor are small prices to pay for quality alchemy.
Starfalls Ancestor 3B
Creature — Bat Pegasus Spirit
Flying, menace
Channel — 1B, Discard Starfalls Ancestor: Put a menace counter on target creature you control. That creature gains flying until end of turn.
Many generations watch over the town, some less open-minded than others.
3/1
Communal Rebuilding 5BB
Sorcery
Assist (Another player may pay up to 5 of this spell’s cost.)
Return up to three target creature cards in graveyards to their owners’ hands.
Starfalls Town as the bat ponies knew it was gone, but Hoofington was happy to help them make something better.
Gem-Tipped Spear 1R
Artifact — Equipment
As long as it’s your turn, equipped creature gets +1/+0 and has first strike.
Whenever a creature dealt damage by equipped creature this turn dies, create a Treasure token. (It’s an artifact with “T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.”)
Equip 1
Hoofington Smith 1R
Creature — Pony Citizen
1, T, Exile an artifact card from your graveyard: Create a Treasure token.
“It’s a rough job without a horn, but it’s not so bad once your lips get callouses.”
2/2
Harassing Warren-Guard 2R
Creature — Dog Warrior
Whenever Harassing Warren-Guard or another Dog enters the battlefield under your control, target creature can’t block this turn.
A good deal of the Diamond Dog defensive strategy is being so obnoxious that nothing wants to get near their home.
3/2
Rambling Rock Salesdog 2R
Creature — Dog Rogue
T, Discard a card: Draw a card.
T, Sacrifice an artifact: Draw a card.
Diamond Dogs embraced trade once they realized ponies were serious about giving them gems in exchange for not-gems.
1/1
Confound the Cockatrice G
Instant
Spree (Choose one or more additional costs.)
+1 — Target creature gains indestructible until end of turn.
+1 — Target creature gains deathtouch until end of turn.
+2 — Target creature you control fights targets creature you don’t control.
Spot the Shortcut 1G
Sorcery
Target creature explores. That creature gains nonbasic landwalk until end of turn. (Reveal the top card of your library. Put that card into your hand if it’s a land. Otherwise, put a +1/+1 counter on that creature, then put the card back or put it into your graveyard. That creature can’t be blocked this turn as long as defending player controls a nonbasic land.)
Everfree Alchemist 2G
Creature — Zebra Warlock
When Everfree Alchemist enters the battlefield, you gain life equal to the greatest power among creatures you control.
Plot 1G (You may pay 1G and exile this card from your hand. Cast it as a sorcery on a later turn without paying its mana cost. Plot only as a sorcery.)
3/2
Festival Preparations 3G
Enchantment
At the beginning of combat on your turn, put a +1/+1 counter on target creature you control.
Coven — Whenever you attack, if you control three or more creature with different powers, untap all attacking creatures you control.
Lemon Bath Bomb 1
Artifact
W, Sacrifice Lemon Bath Bomb: Destroy target enchantment.
1, Sacrifice Lemon Bath Bomb: Draw a card.
“Sweeten that which was never sour.”
—Bath bomb inscription
Submerged Runestone 2
Artifact
1, T: Each player mills two cards.
2, T, Sacrifice Submerged Runestone: Return target noncreature, nonland card from your graveyard to your hand.
Unearth U (U: Return this card from your graveyard to the battlefield. Exile it at the beginning of the next end step or if it would leave the battlefield. Unearth only as a sorcery.)
Out of Stock UB
Instant
As an additional cost to cast this spell, sacrifice a nonland permanent.
Counter target spell that shares a card type with the sacrificed permanent.
Draw a card.
Not all supply shortages are accidents.
The Building of Asgard 1RW
Enchantment — Saga
(As this Saga enters and after your draw step, add a lore counter. Sacrifice after III.)
I — Create a 0/6 colorless Wall artifact creature token with defender.
II — Gain control of target creature until end of turn. Untap that creature. It gains haste until end of turn.
III — Create Sleipnir, a 3/3 legendary white Horse creature token with double strike.
World-Tree Emporium 3GU
Sorcery
Domain — Look at the top X cards of your library, where X is the number of lands you control. Put up to Y of them into your hand and the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order, where Y is the number of basic land types among those lands.
Interplanar bazaars live up to the name.
Asgard, Hall of Lords
Legendary Land
T: Add C.
T: Add one mana of any color. Spend this mana only to cast legendary spells. If that mana is spent to cast a God spell, that spell can’t be countered.
T: Put a +1/+1 counter on target legendary creature that entered the battlefield this turn.
Crumbling Cenote
Land
Crumbling Cenote enters the battlefield tapped with two depletion counters on it.
T, Remove a depletion counter from Crumbling Cenote: Add UB. If there are no depletion counters on Crumbling Cenote, sacrifice it.
Beautiful, yes. Habitable, not for long.
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: You should probably wait until the turn player draws for their turn to Dive Into Dreams. That counts, but the effect of the initial cast doesn't because it hasn't resolved yet.
Protection From Editors Alert: Spot the Shortcut's reminder text forgot to end its italics. The next card also had reminder text, so that doesn't cause as many problems as it could have.
Inside Baseball Alert: The Diamond Dog defensive strategy mentioned in Harassing Warren-Guard is very interesting given that their only focus episode in canon involved them being beaten by this exact method.
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: Yes, Confound the Cockatrice is 4G for "destroy target creature you don't control".
Inside Baseball Alert: Apparently Equestria uses spellbombs as bath bombs. Canterlot is a silly place.
I can't say I know much about the Magic side of things, but I'm always glad to see this underappreciated quest be recognized.
Towards the end of this in-game day is when I joined as a commenter/command-submitter, and began influencing the story. I also started writing some commentary for each update that I could think of commentary for. I don't want to spoil anything about what happens on subsequent days, but I hope you keep reading, 'cause it has been a ride. 