I had a dream... a bad dream... · 5:44pm Jun 19th, 2016
I had a dream last night. A bad one. I know you all probably don't want to hear it, but I need to get it out of my system. I can't go to work today with a cloud hanging over my head.
On FIMFiction, I talk to a lot of people. There's a choice group of people. One of which, I talk to all the time. She's always there, and will always try to comfort me no matter what. But... this dream made me question if what I was doing was okay or not.
I was messaging this user about some problems I was having. Depression problems. Feeling unwanted, sad, and invisible. The usual whining. Usually, this person gives me endless sympathy. No matter what, she'll always try to help me. I went to her about another problem I had and it was a big one. I just felt so angry and sad about something, I just can't remember what though. I sent the message, waiting for some words of comfort. But I got no response. For hours. This was unusual. She usually gets back to me pretty quickly. Being dumb, and thinking she didn't get the messages, I send her more messages to try and get her attention. These messages just include more crying and whining about my problems. 
A few hours later, I finally get a reply. Only it's not typed by her. It's typed by her mother.
Her mother says that I've been telling her daughter too much. Her daughter's been crying all day because of the messages I sent her. I triggered her anxiety, and she doesn't know how to respond to me. Her mother says I don't have any right to put such a burden on such a young soul. Especially not about some petty, selfish problems. She says she understands I have depression, but I failed to consider her daughter's feelings as well, and now I've hurt her. Depression or not, she has her own problems to deal with, and shouldn't have to worry about someone else, especially when they act so selfish.
She formally requests that I stop messaging her, period. And to ensure this, she informs me that she'll be asking her daughter to block me. That way, I can't hurt her or burden her any longer. So I can't make her cry any longer. It's healthier for her if I just leave her alone, and never talk to her again.
Before I knew it, I couldn't see any more messages from her. I couldn't even find her page anymore. All her stories are gone. She's gone. 
A few minutes of crying pass before I get another message. It's from her sister. She says that I can message her, and she'll pass anything along, but I decline. My reason? So I don't pull her into this mess too. I've already alienated one friend, and I can't bear the thought of burdening her too. Her mom is right. I shouldn't have been so selfish. Now I can't even see her anymore, and I can do nothing about it. It's just best if I leave them all alone, and keep my problems to myself. I should never have given that information out.
Then I woke up. 2:00 in the morning. And I cried for about fifteen minutes before I fell back asleep 
. I checked my phone within that time to see if what happened really happened. Thank goodness, no it didn't. But... then I thought about it. It could happen. I could mess up one day, and pay the price by losing a dear friend. I already have revealed a lot to this person, and got scolded once. And even though it was just a dream, I know it's wrong to burden other people with my problems. My problems are mine, and they have their own issues to deal with. I shouldn't be so selfish as to burden other people. I shouldn't share my problems with them.
Maybe I should just stop. Keep to myself. Don't burden other people. If I want to keep my friends...
So... this is referring to a user on here, and they've probably figured out that it's them by now. I mean, it's pretty obvious. I hold no grudges whatsoever. This was just a dream. And either way, this blog post has probably scared them off. I wouldn't be surprised at all. I've made them worry about me, and I'm honestly not worth worrying about.
Sorry for another whining post about my problems. If you're worrying about me... don't. My problems aren't worth anyone's concern. They're petty, just like in my dream. So don't worry about me. It's just not worth it.
But if you made it to the end... thanks for reading.
Don't worry, it's going to be all right. We're all here for you
Oh, no, no, no
It came back, didn't it. Jake, I'm so sorry about your dream.
But trust me, that won't happen. It was just a really bad dream. I will do everything to my ability to help you. My mom... gosh, I hope she would never do that.
*hugs*
Please, don't be afraid to PM me. I won't leave. I don't care if you're upset and want to talk. Don't worry about that.
I don't ever think you have to worry about bothering anyone here, my friend. So many of us, though we have the same problems and concerns, are more than willing and ready to help and be here for you. You are not a bother. Your troubles and depression are very real concerns, to yourself and your friends. You are not a waster of time for myself or anyone else. You have found someone to turn to and that is a good thing, as I'm sure they can turn to you as well. As I'm sure you've noticed, talking about things does help, whether with friends or a professional, or both. Just remember that you have worth to everyone, including yourself. You are talented thoughtful and caring. You are a good person.
If it makes you better, don't be shy to message me. Your not alone Jake, and www will be there for you
4033910 Totally agreed.
Hey, I know you don't know me, but message me and I will always try to cheer you up! No matter what! I may not get to your messages right away, but I will always reply. That is a Pinkie Promise.
A Rainbow promise,
A Twilight promise,
An Applejack promise,
A Fluttershy promise,
And a Rarity promise,
P.S. Because you make me happy with your stories, and I believe I should do the same.
If you ever want to talk about something, just let me know. I'm always at your side.
Nord, I don't want to see you suffer. I'm here for you.
this was a vision you should take caution in your what you say and how you say it. honestly man i donno if i feel luckier or not in your shoes, you got emotional problems but you have friends to talk to, me on the other hand im completely healthy both physically and psychologically, but, i have no one i know id consider a friend anymore.
Don't be sorry, there are people that care the comments below this one prove that.
A dream is just that a dream, don't let one dream bring you down and if it does we're here for you.
Now to cheer you up I have a picture of Fluffe Puff. I hope you have a great day! (I also hope that this helps) img11.deviantart.net/b827/i/2013/058/7/c/fluffle_puff_face_wallpaper_by_imagicialotv-d5vxuq0.png
I'm afraid I can't help much; since I can't dream it's hard for me to have bad dreams.
But, in this sense, I think that you need to talk to insert username here and ask her on whether if you venting to her affects her or not. Just sitting down and worrying only will just add to your stress.
Or, maybe you should try and diversify, if you feel too worried. Maybe try venting to other people you trust, or try and trust some new people (which is significantly harder).
Dude honestly. I've had those types of dreams before, and the freaking suck. So I've been there before, for almost my whole life really. And it is just honestly better to talk about these things with friends.
Either your real ones or your online ones. We'll always be here for you.
PM me if you want to talk about your problems, you'll feel better. I Pinkie Promise
*hugs* It's alright, if you need to talk about what's got you down feel free to seek out help from anyone you trust. If you're worried you're dragging someone else down, just remember we are all willing to listen and help as best we can.
You aren't bothering anyone with this. The reason I'm sure this person talks to you, the reason that anyone comments on these posts, is because we care about you. Don't ever be afraid just to talk to the people who care about you. :hugs:
I'm sorry. I know it hurts to lose contact with people you care about. If you need to talk, I'm here.