• Member Since 11th Jun, 2012
  • offline last seen Oct 17th, 2018

Esle Ynopemos


Was that me? Or was it... somepony else?

More Blog Posts47

  • 465 weeks
    How suck/not-suck is this cover art?

    Hey folks. Next story is coming along, despite the kinks Season 5 is throwing in its path (Seriously, Babs Seed got her cutie mark? Off screen? For hairdressing? There's no way I could've planned for that). Chapter 1 is close, and I'll post it once I have Chapter 2 ready for editing so there hopefully won't be too long a break between updates.

    Read More

    12 comments · 990 views
  • 470 weeks
    Table for a guest, plus call for editors

    Have you heard about Kitsune Risu's new project? No? Have you heard of Kitsune Risu? You should. He's one of the most underrated authors on this site. Roughly one third of my library of Criminally Underrated Stories were penned by this guy.

    Read More

    3 comments · 501 views
  • 474 weeks
    Bitter Harvest mini-prequel of sorts

    Some of you already know, but I have been hosting weekly writing prompts over at Thirty Minute Ponies. Each prompt is always posted with a mini-fic alongside it, sort of as an example, but mostly to keep myself writing alongside the participants.

    Read More

    13 comments · 940 views
  • 482 weeks
    Contest results, and an apology

    This is embarrassingly and inexcusably late, and still half-assed and incomplete, but...

    The It's My Birthday and I'll Ship Ponies If I Want To contest is over! Like, more than a month ago! Timing!

    I am really sorry about this. You folks who put effort forward to make something nice deserve better than this.

    Read More

    2 comments · 545 views
  • 495 weeks
    It's my birthday. Gimme stuff.


    I get to re-use something I've already drawn!

    Read More

    13 comments · 775 views
Jun
3rd
2014

Writer's Block Party, Part One · 9:02am Jun 3rd, 2014

Howdy hey, readers, readerettes, and all other shades thereof/undecided! I bet you're all wondering what has become of your favorite author on the site, huh?

Not sure why you would expect me to know, though; Cold in Gardez is that-a-way.

Har, har. No, seriously, if Gardez isn't your favorite author here, you need to read more of his stuff until he is. Dude is like a superhero. A writing superhero, who... like, writes really good... Shut up.

If you haven't already guessed from the blog title, I am feeling much less like a writing superhero myself. Unless that superhero has been exposed to prodigious quantities of kryptonite. I have had a few weeks months to come down off the wave of attention Bitter Harvest garnered, and have found myself in the doldrums ever since. Stories have remained unwritten and left to wither away, forgotten, while I burn through my Netflix queue of all the Scrubs, ever. I don't even like Scrubs all that much.

So I have decided to start writing these blogs. It is my intention that I will find them so irritating that I will be forced to write a story to completion just so that I have an excuse to declare my writer's block over and can stop blogging about it. Failing that, it will annoy you folks so much that when I eventually succumb to a stroke caused by people who put the toilet paper roll on backwards, nobody will be disappointed that I never got around to writing that one story I promised once.

In that spirit, I will now wildly and recklessly announce a handful of stories that may someday exist, if you're extra good and wish really hard and say you believe in Santa Claus.

Color Code:

Green: What do these colors even mean?
Blue: I don't even know.
Purple: I think I just use them to pretend I have a plan.

-

And Then Applejack Was a Vampire - You've seen this one in my blogs before. Applejack wakes up one morning with fangs and finds that she is not very good at being a creature of the night. I've been hung up on one stupid little detail for this fic for so long now, and it isn't even really that important. I could have had the first chapter of this up for editing ages ago if I could just make a decision on it one way or the other and move on.

Expect to see it this Schmebrutember.

Twilight and Applejack Steal a Train - This has been in the imaginary queue that I don't really adhere to at all for even longer. Twilight still had yet to be bested by an evil door back when I wrote the beginning of this. Still, the pun 'Twijacking' retains its ability to make me giggle, so I have hope for this story yet.

I'll work on getting a draft ready next Froogsday.

Z-Clop, Chapter Four - I've gotten a few stanzas into the next chapter of rhyming pony porn. I have an inkling of what will go on in it, and who knows, a burst of inspiration might sweep through and write the rest of the chapter in one or two sittings for me. I wouldn't hold my breath, though. Progress on Z-Clop is erratic, even when I'm on a roll with it.

I'll definitely have something up by the 31st of February, if you want to mark it in your calendars.

Applejack of All Trades - Celestia, I like the premise I have for this one so much. If I could just make myself sit down and write it, I think it could be actually decent. The idea is that Applejack is stuck in Manehattan with the ability to copy the special talent of anypony she comes in contact with. Like The Pretender, except with best pony, so way better than The Pretender.

This story will release just prior to J'rgohhor consuming the sun and casting all life in blackness.

All in the Book - This is a working title, one that I'm not satisfied with and would like to change before it goes up, if it ever does. You may know it better as Daring Do and the Princess of Magic, if you read my TMP collections. If you don't, the premise is that Twilight has to step into the worlds contained in the books her friends are reading, in order to save them. The thirty minute one-shot was just a scene in Rainbow's book, hence the title, but I would have a chapter for each pony in this expansion of it.

This story will be written upon the wings of fairies, and carried across the sea by an old, dying bird that wants to see the sun rise one last time over the nesting ground of its youth. I will not spring for mailer's insurance on it.

Crying Out Loud in a Mug - Another story from the TMP pot. Bon Bon and Lyra are having relationship troubles, and Bon Bon puts in for a dating service. When Princess Luna arrives to sweep her marefriend away, a heartbroken and inebriated Lyra entangles a quite unwilling Rainbow Dash in an ill-advised plan to get Bon Bon back.

A timely release of this story is unlikely, but at least it is more likely than me declaring to the world that FlashLight is the One True Pairing and is good and right and true.

Spitballed - Comedic clop. A clopedy, if you will. Spitfire hits on Rarity. When Rarity takes the Wonderbolt captain up on her offer, she gets more - and less - than she bargained for.

I will wait to post this story until there is peace and understanding between all the peoples of the world, when there is no more fear, nor hunger, nor tears apart from those shed for joy.

-

Oh, and I guess as a minor aside, I just graduated. Anyone know of any job openings for a freshly-minted anthropologist?

Report Esle Ynopemos · 601 views ·
Comments ( 13 )

Ah yes. Imaginary story ques. I've been working on mine for a few years now.

Either way, I hope you find a way to get out of the writer's block(some of these stories sound quite fun~)

I guess my best advice would be to talk to people.
These blogs should be a great start.

Hmm... that whole 'consuming the sun's bit sounds a tad rude. You should release the story the day of, so we have something entertaining to read while we await the inevitable. Ah'k?

Whenever I get a block, I write down anything. Parts of scenes, half-baked ideas, character studies, headcanons, anything that will make me put words on a page. Sometimes, you look at what you've written and think that someone ought to take away your author's license and sometimes, your stories will run away with you and turn into something decent enough to post, with four or five reviews and a dash of crippling self-doubt. What do you mean that's not normal?

One of my most highly rated stories started off as a character study, while two or three of the big multi-chapter world spanning adventures can't seem to get out of the gate, so always remember that stories have minds of their own. Just roll with it and see where they take you - you might be surprised.

As for that anthropology thing, Lyra might want a word with you.

Wait, what? When did Twilight get "bested by an evil door"?

These are all interesting, but "Applejack of All Trades" is the one I really want to see. I don't think I've seen "Cutie Mark Duplicator" as a premise before.

The point of college was to get a job afterwards?

Why didn't anyone tell meeeee?! :raritydespair:

2170909 Season 3 premiere. Everyone made fun of the fact that the door at the bottom of the Crystal Palace - the one that gives Twilight nightmares of failure - was a more active and intimidating villain than Sombra.

I really hope I can get AJoAT up eventually. Between AJ the doctor, AJ the lawyer, and AJ the stunt-flier, it's bound to be a good time.

2170437 Discrete units of time mean nothing in the keening shadow of J'rgohhor. There is only the cold of void and the wails of lost souls.

2170762 That process is how most of the stories on this list got there. I've got no problem starting new stories, it's just finishing them before some issue or another comes along and freezes my progress on them.

As for Lyra, if she can pay me a decent wage I'm listening.

2171263 It came as a shock to me, too. :applejackconfused:

Let me give you three pieces of advice that have pushed me through very tall walls.

1. If you can't finish a scene, leave it as is and continue to the next one.
2. If you can't start a scene, try starting it from another pony's perspective.
3. If you're unsure what choice to make at a crossroad. write both and see which one works.

Those three tricks have helped me out sooooooooooo many times.

Good luck and hope to see more from you soon! :pinkiehappy:

I don't even like Scrubs all that much.

Wat.

But besides that, and how you should burn for that horrible heretic statement, Spitballed sounds the most interesting to me at this point. Hm. Whenever Gostober runs around, let me know.

Also, congratulations on your graduation. I just wanted to say that. S'cool. Except that you don't like scrubs that much and I can never respect you regardless.

But yeah. congrats. :rainbowdetermined2:

2175849 JD is, all told, kinda an asshat. It was easier for me to sympathize with him when it was once a week and missing half of the things that went on, but now that I'm marathoning it, it's a lot clearer that he really is a prick.

But thanks. It took longer than it should have, and I'm going to be in debt until the very concept of money has faded from memory, but I finally have a piece of paper to show for it... which says that the actual piece of paper will be mailed at a later date. :applejackunsure:

Ooh, did you just graduate from your first or second cycle? In any case, congratulations! :pinkiesmile: Have fun job-searching!

2201319 Cycle? First, I think, unless I mistake your meaning of the term. A "four year degree," though it took me a lot longer than that because I only took one or two classes per semester.

2201408
Ah, I see. Yes, first cycle = bachelor's degree. I was wondering since you'd seem to be further along in life than a typical bachelor's student.

Login or register to comment