Welcome to the Herd · 2:05pm Sep 22nd, 2023
Had a random thought a bit ago, and I finally figured out how to finish it. So, with apologies to Bo Burnham...
Welcome to Equestria
Come and meet your friends
Pay no heed to flimsy structures on which the whole world depends
We’ve got heroes and villains
Some harmless, some worse
If you haven’t brushed with death this week, you’d be the first.
Welcome to Equestria
Please don’t mind the way
We must manually operate the wheel of night and day
We make weather in fac’tries
Plants need help to grow
If any of it goes wrong then you’re first to know
Welcome to Equestria
Time to go and play
Prince Rutherford just declared war
Because yaks were bored today
We have parties, and pastries, and magical spells
And a dedicated Hell-prison
To contain the countless horrors that tried to kill us all
Welcome to Equestria!
Don’t adjust your set
Yes, the god of chaos has tea every Tuesday with your vet
Sure he tortured, betrayed us
Gatekept and gaslit
But he said he’s sorry so don’t throw a fit.
Try the local fashions
Buy tomatoes, pay a toll
See a mare go supersonic
Get your every thought controlled
Read the paper, tip your baker
Do not breathe that evil vapor
Watch the latest Bearer caper
Just take in the whole landscape or
Here’s a party invitation
Sombra’s back again
Sheep can speak the pony language
But they still are kept in pens
Casinos are like arcades
Come and have a ball
A swarm of dragons could just come incinerate us all.
Chorus (x2):
Sitting on the edge of death
All of the time
A tiny little chance of death
All of the time
Laughs and love and friends and cake
And harmony sublime
A minor risk of omnicide
All of the time
You know, it wasn’t always like this.
Awfully long ago
Many years before
After deregulation, circa ’84
There were Bushwoolies
Apple trees
A castle or two
They sold their toys and brought some joy
Building
To you, you, precarious you
Lauren wrote the G4 bible
Hasbro saw it through
And it did all the things
None expected it to
Now look at you, oh
Look at you, you, you
Improbable, memeable
Your mark is made
Your tale we say
Sunny and her crew
And if the ride keeps going
Who knows what they’ll do
There was never a plan
So now the world’s in your hand…
(Chorus x2)
A minor risk of omnicide
A tiny chance we all will die
With Twilight’s fall and Sunny’s rise
All of the time.
This reads frightfully like a description of real life except the villains use magic instead of computers.
That aside, brilliantly well done.
😈🤣😈🤣😈🤣😈🤣😈🤣😈
Now we need to do a "Welcome to the Bronies" version
This needs a PMV pronto.
Singing this to myself was the highlight of my week. Incredible job!
Wow, what a fantastic job matching all the different pacings in this song and having it still make sense. Great work, loved it!
Whooooaaaa Sweet Twi of miiiinnnneeee!
We are pleased.
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Wonderful.
Phenomenal! Gave me a good chuckle, thanks, I needed that today.
That was really cute, took me back to the height of the fandom with all the pony versions of songs
Reminds me of what Watchpony did last time...
That was incrdible~