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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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A nice 'clean' get away, love it.
Ohhh I'm liking this! Would have been interesting to have an insight look at what the princesses were saying/doing/thinking when they seen the killer and Twi making out right there. XD
That was interesting. I can't what Rainbow Dash's reaction will be to working with Rarity's and her own killer.
you made the wise choice with the killer working for twi
oh you did just what i would do! gods this is getting good.
Why did the killer kill rainbow if she only kills unicorn mares?
I think the princesses should let Twilight off the hook. They've heard what shes been up to and why she did what she did. They know her motives and understand that she still has high morals. I mean If you are wise you should understand that if the pony doing the dark art has full control of themselves and is willing to fight for the good of the country if unmolested then Why continue chasing them. Also I See the princesses being willing to understand and accept Twilight's position on things.
also I like how your killer was a complete OC, now who killed Midnight Breezes brother?
“I’ll take it to my grave.” Such a good choice of words. Twillight basically promised nothing.
What confuse me though is the complete "you are my enemy" attitude of Celestia. I mean , I would expect her to contact Twillight to try to reason with her or something (Given the fact that she is the benevolent and caring kind of pony even if she is incompetent.) . It's like she completely erased their relationship for her mind. Plus , Twillight did nothing wrong...well , ressurecting her friends doesn't count because they were willing.
Also , I love this song , such a masterpiece...
What a plot twist; pun intended.
Now where do I begin with both chapter updates? Oh yes, know I remember.
Chapter 10 pretty much served it's purpose by trying to get Scootaloo to realize the dangers of being an experiment. Thankfully, I'm just relieved no pony got tentacle raped.
Now with the 11th Chapter. From what I was reading, I'm starting to think you may be building up to something climatic in your story. And I am quite satisfied knowing that Midnight Breeze has finally made her debut.
Overall, both chapters were good and well thought out. Can't wait for the next update.
But know for something... completely different
I like this whole idea as long as twilight has total control and doesn't get one uped by the murderer.
morals aside,why recruit a gryphon army instead of an undead one?necromancy zombies don't stop fighting until their bodies are incapable of any form of moment at all,unless you kill the necromancer,were as with gryphons they will stop if wounded or they they die(plus you need to feed gryphons and keep their morale up,but with zombies you don't)
2456396
fc07.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2011/289/9/1/why_not__by_rober_raik-d4czhw0.png
2456396 To grab Twilimancer's attention, perhaps?
2456536
Well, she ripped out blueblood's tongue, but I guess nopony in Canterlot really minded that. Yeah, I'm not sure why Celestia isn't trying to reason with her first, or why she'd be treated as more hostile than a mass murderer (It's not like she killed anyone, she only unkilled a few). Though I can see why she'd be considered a larger threat, just from hear massive magical ability.
Now that you highlight Twilight's motive decay, when she supposedly transitioned from being pissed at Celestia not being a god (and I guess trying to fill the perceived power vacuum herself?) to trying to catch the killer, I'm not really sure how her research was at all contributing to that goal. We never really see her doing anything to find the killer. If necromancy was to play into it, I'd think she'd be sneaking into graveyards to temporarily resurrect victims and question them about the killer Pushing Up Daisies style. But instead of any kind of detective work, it's a bunch of experimentation, sex, and planting sleeper agents everywhere. It seems like all along she's just been doing necromancy because fuck it, sex and power. I'm kinda wondering how they got Fluttershy onboard, or if she just accepted helping to cover for Twilight -> killer gets caught.
Also kind of hoping Twilight has a plan to backstab the killer and hasn't forgotten that she killed Dash and Rarity, which is the entire reason Fluttershy and Scootaloo joined them. Otherwise, I'll have to say that the worst side effect of necromancy is extreme motive decay.
That moment when you hit the end of the chapter and is all like nooooooo!!! But then you realise. ITS NOT THE END
Hehehehe, how devilish of Twilight. Teaming up wit hthe mare who killed her friends, nice.
Shexy~
Good job!