A thing or two about changelings and their habits saga

by Young discord

CHAPTER 2 (AKA: My name's Pinkie Pie, what's yours?)

"And then I said OATMEAL, ARE YOU CRAZY!"

"SHHHH! I think he's waking up"

"You mean SHE'S waking up"

"Quiet everypony! get ready, we don't know what he- I mean she... whatever it is, is up to..."
Mark opened his eyes to discover that he's in some sort of room (probably a cottage no doubt) and he was surrounded by ponies of many hues.
Silence fell as quickly as it does when you discover that a beloved family member has died, and the atmosphere tasted horrible, it tasted like... tension, with a pinch of fear (personally, Mark's least favourite flavour of emotion) and it was all directed at him.
Suddenly the Pink pony hopped on the bed he just noticed he was in, shoved her nozzle-like snout threateningly close to his and said:

"Hi! my name's Pinkie Pie, what's yours?"
Silence fell for a second time, like a thin fog in the room, except this time the silence was spiked with awkwardness.
Once Mark figured out that it was his turn to retort, he decided to no longer delay the inevitable.

"Mark"

"Mark?- said pinkie in a tone of disbelief -That's a funny name"

"Says the one named after a finger and a pastry"
Pinkie moved even closer to Mark's face and slowly squinted her eyes.

"Touche..."spoke out Pinkie with squinty eyes and a smile as she slowly removed herself from the bed whilst still maintaining eye contact with the newcomer.

"Hi, my name is Twilight Sparkle, we found you unconscious on the road and my friend Fluttershy here" she pointed at the yellow pony with a pink mane "nursed you back to health... she says she will take care of you until you can take care of yourself but as soon as you are back on your hooves, you need to go away from here"
Mark didn't feel like he had the possibility of saying no, so he just nodded instead.

"Fluttershy, we will be taking turns to keep an eye on him, and the rest of us will be coming to visit you everyday to make sure everything is fine"

"If you say so..." whispered Fluttershy, or did she just say that? it was hard to tell for Mark, the pony had such a gentle voice that it sounded like she was constantly whispering... when he tried to taste her emotions (to try to figure out the pony's character), he could make out kindness, a dash of embarrassment, (seasoned with doubt) and a side-dish of lots and lots of shyness which was dipped in compassion and then deep-fried in friendship.
Once all the ponies apart from Fluttershy (and Pinkie Pie as it was her turn to stay with Fluttershy) left, Pinkie started to quiz Mark about everything (Mark almost threw up from all that curiosity that he was eating from Pinkie, but he was weak and he needed lots of positive emotions aimed at him to get better, so he couldn't afford to be picky)

"How old are you?"

"19"

"Are you a boy or a girl?"

"I'm a bo- wait, seriously? can't you tell???"

"I don't know... how can you tell?"

"OUR WINGS!" snapped back Mark while holding one of his wings with one hoof and pointing at it with the other

"Your wings?"

"Yes!, us males have "chartreuse" coloured wings and females have "harlequin" coloured wings"

"Really? why are there holes in your hooves?"

"you're a piece of work, you know that?"

"Thank you!, why are there holes in your hooves?"

"We just evolved that way I guess... it gives us more speed when we fly because they're lighter and more aerodynamic than just regular hooves and they're handy when you want to hold a few things at once, see?" said Mark as he reached out one of his hooves towards her "and the holes are of different sizes because sometimes we need to hold things that HAVE different sizes, look" Mark pointed at the smallest hole "that one is called a-"

"Where are you from?"

"Sorry?"

"Where are you from?"

"Wait, don't you want to know about the little hole?" asked Mark but the taste of boredom emanating from Pinkie already answered that question for him

"Booooring! I want to know where you're from"

"Ok then, have a guess" said Mark trying to reignite that curiosity inside of Pinkie.
Pinkie began to trot back and forth across the room with one hoof on her snout

"Hmmm... well your accent sounds Coltic so i'm going... to go... wiiiith... ISTALLION!"
Something would have snapped inside of mark right about now if he weren't so surprised by the lack of Pinkie's logic in the first place

"ISTALLION? WHAT THE- HOW- JUST- I'M FROM SCOLTLAND! Scoltland! just which part of coltic spells Istally for you?"
Pinkie made a sour face and rolled out her tongue at him

"You're no fun!"

"So, you like fun, huh?"
He should not have said that... Pinkie, as if being stabbed in the rump by an invisible white hot poker began to hop all over the place (much like a cork does when it is finally freed from the oppressive regime of the champaign bottle)

"OH YES, FUN FUN FUN FUN FUN!!!!"
Mark couldn't take it, the flavour of pinkie's fun was so strong that soon enough the entire bed was dyed with various bodily fluids coming from the changeling's mouth

"Eeeeewwwwwww!"
Fluttershy flew in to see what the commotion was all about

"Oh dear! you poor thing, what's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing, just a little too much fun for me"
Pinkie gasped in horror

"YOU TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW!"

"No! you don't understand, us changelings feed on emotional energy, right? well we don't have to feed off love, we can feed off any positive emotional energy as far as it is directed at us, for instance the only reason why I still exist is because Fluttershy's compassion towards me was enough to keep me alive... and I just tasted Pinkie's fun"
Pinkie shrugged

"Makes no sense to me"

"What about emotions that aren't directed at you? can you feed of them as well? I mean you don't have to answer if you don't want to, if that's a personal question, I understand..." asked Fluttershy while looking down as she drew invisible circles on the floor with her left hoof

"No, but we can taste them, that's why I just vomited because the taste of Pinkie's excitement was too strong for me, sorry Pinkie..."

"That's OK, I stopped listening some time ago anyway"

"Wait, what? what are you talking about?"

"What are YOU talking about?"
Mark sighed, trying to continue this conversation with Pinkie would be the same as trying to smash a supporting wall with his head.

"Never mind... by the way i'm sorry about the bedsheets, i'll clean them right now"

"That's OK, i'll do it, you're sick and you should rest until you feel better"
Mark really wanted to get out of Pinkie's quiz trap

"I insist, doing something would do me a world of good right about now"

"O... OK... i'm going to go now to feed my chickens if that's OK with you..."

"Sure, no problem"
Fluttershy proceeded to the chicken coop outside whilst Mark got up and looked at his artwork on the bedsheets

"Yuck..." mumbled mark to himself, as he took the bedsheets in his hooves, strung them through his holes in order to hold them all at once and proceeded to the bathroom to cleanse them from the horrible stuff.

"Hey, Mark?"
Mark turned around to look at the (still) excited mare

"Yeah?"

"I was thinking, maybe when you get better we could make you a farewell party, I could show you my party cannon!" Pinkie revealed her party cannon out of nowhere.
Mark was surprised once again, every time he thought he just about saw everything, Pinkie happens

"HOW DID YOU DO THAT? did you just take that out of your rump?!?"

"No silly! I just took it out, see? like this!" Pinkie hid the cannon behind her and then took it out again

"You just hid it behind your body..."

"No I didn't, see?" Pinkie moved the cannon behind her once again and then moved aside to show that what was supposed to be there wasn't there anymore

"OK... this is interesting... maybe it's some form of magic"
Mark was now overflown with curiosity, he let go of the bedsheets at once, walked up to pinkie and began to trot around her in a circle carefully examining her

"Hmmmm... you're an earth pony, am I right?"

"Uhhhhh... duh! you don't see any wings or any horn on me, do you?"

"Yeah,you're right, but this makes no sense it has to be some sort of magic... tell me, were any of your ancestors unicorns?"
Pinkie thought hard with her little head

"well... my great-great-great grandfather was a unicorn I think..."

"hmmm... well in that case maybe you've inherited the gene responsible for unicorn magic that has been dormant in your family for generations and it suddenly became active... that would be the most reasonable explanation..."

"But I haven't got a horn, so how can I do magic?"

"Who said you need a horn to use magic? Pegasi don't have horns but they still have enough magic in them to be able to walk on clouds and be able to touch them... a horn only works as an amplifier to your magic, making it easier to control... i'm guessing that you can't completely control all these funny things that happen to you"

"Now that you mention it, I do have my combos"

"Combos? what are those?"

"Combos, they're these things that happen to my body whenever something is about to happen and it's never wrong!"

"You mean like predicting the future?"

"Yeah, something like that"

"well that makes sense... maybe you have an active gene responsible for magic but you have no horn to be able to freely control it, which explains all this random stuff you're able to do... well, back to the bedsheets"

"OH NO!" Pinkie shouted as her tail started twitching, she then zipped under Mark's bed

"What are you doing?"

"It's the twicha-twitch in my tail! this means something is about to fall from the sky!"
Mark decided to be better safe and slightly silly than sorry so he dived under the sofa.
There was a tinkling sound coming from Alicorn knows where, a white flash and a purple baby dragon just appeared in the middle of the air and fell down to the floor with a thud.

"Hi Spike!"

"Ow, ow, ow, ow.... hey Pinkie..." replied the plushy thing

"You know him?"

"Sure, he's Twilight's helper,he helps her out with things, how's the magic going, spike?"
Spike got up with a moan

"Twilight was just trying the teleportation spell, she wanted to check if she could teleport somepony else... as you can see it worked... except that she didn't tell me I would have to walk back..."

"Hi, my name is Mark"
Spike just noticed the changeling hiding under the sofa like a cat

"Hey!, you're that evil changeling Twilight told me about!"

"Is that so..."
A devious idea slithered into mark's mind...

"You, know... us changelings don't just live off emotional energy... we also eat meat... do you know what our favourite meat is?" began Mark as he came out from under the sofa and began to gently proceed towards the now troubled Spike.

"N-no, I d-don't..."
Spike began to slowly retreat towards the door

"Oooohh... but I think you do..."

"I d-d-do???" squealed spike as his back hit the door, which unfortunately for him, had to be opened towards the inside of the cottage... he was now trapped like that one X mark you put in the corner, in tic-tac-toe

"Oh yes... we just loooooove the taste of"

"Please"

"Baby"

"NO"

"DRAGONSSSSSSSSS!" Hissed Mark, with his tongue lashing out at the terrified little thing.
Spike lost it

"PLEASE HAVE MERCYYYYYYY!!!!!" Screamed Spike as he frantically opened the door and ran outside gashing with tears
Mark couldn't hold it in anymore, he fell to the floor laughing his flank off

"HEY, THAT WAS MEAN! YOU MEANIE!"

"OK, OK, i'm sorry, i'll say sorry to him when I see him the next time, but you must admit that was funny..."

"Yeeeeahhhh... OK, it was kinda funny but you took it too far, you need to be careful when you prank somepony, I would know, i'm the number 1 prankster in Ponyville!" stated proudly Pinkie
Mark smiled
Maybe this isn't going to be as bad as he thought it would be.

Comments

[Perteks]

Ok that is for sure not what i though it will be. But still it's good stuff

[Delete account]

Mark smiled

Maybe this isn't going to be as bad as he thought it would be.

[anyone675]

< See that? That's 100% pure hate comeing for you.

[Young discord]

Well, i tried to colour the text to make it more clear who is talking rather than making th estory more pretty, if anything if i would actually try to make the story more "pretty" i'd add pictures all over the place.
your chritique is very appreciated though, if you guys find the coloured text annoying, let me know and i won't do it again

[Razzy]

Pfft, never too much mental trauma for Spike.