A thing or two about changelings and their habits saga

by Young discord

CHAPTER 9 (AKA: The Doctor is in)

The brown stallion shoved past Sails into the restaurant

“I’m sorry-“began Sails

“Don’t be”
The doctor withdrew what seemed to be some sort of metal wand with some kind of light orb at the end which he then proceeded to point in random directions.
The wand buzzed and zizzed in various tones as if it were reacting to something
Sails once again, confused at what the hell is going on decided to ask once again

“I’m sorry, but… well, how should I put it… what the heck are you doing coming into my house at this time of night and doing… THAT”
Sails pointed at the metal wand

“Oh don’t mind that, it’s just my screwdriver”

“Screwdriver? Look never mind that, my name is Sails, now if you were to be so kind as to give me yours and tell me what you are doing here”

“I’m the doctor and I’m here to help”

“Help?”

“Yes, help”

“I don’t need help”

“Yes you do, you just don’t know it yet”

“I don’t need help!”
The Doctor approached the changeling in pony form

“Look, don’t play games with me, I’m the Doctor and I can help you if you tell me everything”

“Do you approach any random pony and tell them that?”
The doctor smiled

“More often than you’d think”

“You’re crazy, you know that?”
The Doctor sighed and inhaled a large amount of air

“You’re not a Pegasus unicorn or a regular earth pony for that matter if you were then you’d look like one but you don’t how do I know that? I know that because a perception filter is fine and dandy unless you encounter anypony with basic psychic training but that’s not the real question the real question here is WHY why use a perception filter to look like anypony else especially a different kind and the answer is simple: you’re hiding but this makes no sense if you’d want to hide you would do anything to keep the attention away from you so why? Why open something like this restaurant if you know this is going to catch everypony’s attention?”
The doctor inhaled the life-giving oxygen back into his lung as if having just come out of a long dive underwater.
Sails was speechless; this stallion was spot-on with everything

“Are… are you a changeling too?”

“No, I’m a Timelo- wait that isn’t right, the ponies here seem to add equine nomenclature to names of all sorts… well in that case I guess I’d be a… Timehorse? Timepony? No… that sounds just weird”

“Timecolt?”

“YES, that’s it! Timecolt! Sounds just right!”

“Hmmm… a Timecolt, never heard of a kind like that… the more you know I guess, well in any case my real name is Mark and I’m a changeling”

“Ello Mark, I’m the doctor”

“You’re called the doctor?”

“Yep”

“Just the doctor?”

“Why does everypony say that as if it were a weird thing?”

“Oh, no no no… there’s nothing wrong with that, I’m sure your parents loved you in their own way”
The doctor fell on the floor laughing which took a solid few minutes for him to calm down

“You’re funny! Funny as in ha-ha funny not oh-oh funny”

“I beg your pardon?”

“I like ha-ha funny”
Mark felt like this was an enormous waste of time

“Look maybe we can talk this through; I’ll boil the water and get the tea and coffee ready”
Once the chessboard of manners was set with tea, coffee and a few leftover cookies from earlier today, Mark began to unfold his tale of past present and even a possible future before the Doctor’s ears.

“So what you’re trying to tell me is that you think your kind is in danger from extinction unless you do something?” asked the Doctor

“Well you’re oversimplifying it but yeah, more or less…”

“NAH, they’ll be fine”

“How would you know that?”

“You know in my travels I’ve come across this one species… not much to look at, they aren’t strong, agile, they have no natural way of defending themselves from predators and although they do have their moments they’re usually rather thoughtless, but you know what? Wherever I go I always, ALWAYS find them, they’re everywhere! And no matter what happens to them, whether they’re enslaved, slaughtered, decimated, upgraded, or tortured they always pull through…”

“What are they called?”

“What they’re called isn’t important, what’s important is not to give up, I’m sure that in a few hundred years your kind will look back at this moment and they’ll laugh at it”

“No they won’t”

“Wanna bet?”

“Yeah, sure, let’s just travel a few hundred years into the future and check” Replied Mark in the most sarcastic possible way

“Why not? I’ve parked my TARDIS just outside, let’s go”
Mark was caught off-guard, He expected the doctor to be surprised at Mark’s reply but he wasn’t.

“So… what you’re trying to tell me is that we’re going to travel a few hundred years in the future?”

“Sure, how do 504 years sound to you?”
Mark was too off-track to reply

“Marvellous! 504 years it is!”
Mark was still trying to get his head around his current situation

“Well what are you waiting for? Let’s go!”
Mark jumped back from the inside of his jumbled thoughts and back into the even more jumbled situation.
The 2 ponies (of course by ponies I mean our two characters even though technically neither of them are of pony kind) quietly exited the comfortable quarters and approached what seemed to be some sort of rather large blue outdoor toilet with fogged up glass windows And a big clear sign at the top saying PONY BOX with a weird lamp stuck at the top of the whole bizarre construction.
“Why would a toilet have windows?” thought Mark
Whatever it was, Mark knew it wasn’t pony kind that built it, or in fact anything sentient that ever existed in this universe.

“I know, I know, it looks like a regular police telephone booth but-”

“Actually I was going to say outdoor toilet… what’s a Telephone booth?”

“Oh, right, I forgot, you ponies don’t have telephones”

“What’s a telephone?”

“Never mind what it is, I’ll tell you some other time… and yeah, I guess you could Mistake it for a toilet… I think from now on I should start locking the doors when I leave it just in case… you know… ponies that have business to attend to”
The colt opened one side of the double doors and entered.
Mark hesitated; it didn’t look like there’s a lot of room inside, maybe he should wait until the Doctor comes out to make some room

“Are you coming or not” replied an unexpectedly quiet echo from within
It was clear that the doctor was shouting and yet Mark heard his voice rather faintly…
A preposterous idea came into Mark’s head as his hooves dared to slowly close up on the open door.

“Wait a minute… nooo… it couldn’t be…”
Mark’s body trespassed the realm of Equestria and entered the realm of Timecolts
The inside of the seemingly wooden box was completely different… in many ways it looked like what one would imagine the inside of a pokéball would look like for a Pokémon residing inside it yet it was indescribingly out of place… the best way to describe it would be to call it… well… Timecolt…-ish

“Ok, NOW I have seen everything”

“I’ll be quoting you on that in a few minutes, now hold on to something” began the Doctor as he began to do random things around in the room with a certain level of certainty as if in all this discordial dancing there was some sort of pattern and sense to it that only the Doctor could make out.

“Aaaaaaand here we go!”
The doctor flipped a lever and all of the sudden the door to the outside world closed, the whole structure began to shake out of control and creak.
A gradual sound began to emanate from all around as if time itself began to breathe in and out.

“Doctor! I think something’s wrong! I don’t think it should shake like this!”

“Oh don’t worry, we’ll be fine… I think”

“You think? YOU THINK???”

“It’s just the transdimensional bridges acting up again”

“Are you absolutely SURE that this is safe?”

“Well, that all depends on how well you’re holding onto that rail, don’t you think?”

“OH, YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!”
The shaking and the breathing slowed down to a halt which was followed briefly by a deep thump… the kind of thump you’d expect to hear when something is forcibly shoved into time and existence all of a sudden.

“Molto bene! Let’s have a look then, shall we?”
Mark pried his shaking hooves from the rail
The doctor peeked through the door and after a second or two he popped the head back in, looked at Mark with a smile and said:

“Well earth’s still there and the air is breathable, I’d say we’re in for a good start”

“Am I to assume that outside of that door we’re in the same place but 504 years in the future and not in the present?”

“Well… yeah, what did you think, we just stayed in one place all of the time? You must be crazy!”

“You know, you’re starting to remind me a certain pink pony I know… I think you two would get along well”

“Oh, you mean Pinkie Pie?”

“How did you know who was I talking about?”

“How many pink ponies have you seen around?”

“Point taken…”

“Now, let’s go or we’ll miss the parade!”

“Parade?”

“Go have a look”
Mark mustered the courage to face the impossible head-on and peeked outside only to be pushed rather harshly by the doctor’s rump into the outside brave new world that shouldn’t exist for at least the next 504 years.
It was amazing, the whole place was like some sort of… well amusement park is the best thing Mark could think of but to be honest, calling it an amusement park would be a clear understatement, in fact calling that an understatement would be an understatement itself.
Everything the Doctor said was pretty much spot on, Ponies, Ponies everywhere but not on their own, no, they were just walking around casually completely unaware of the dragons, gryphons and even the changelings who didn’t seem to have bothered with disguising themselves.
The doctor stopped a random trespasser pony

“I’m sorry to disturb you but I’ve got a question- oh wait a minute… hey Mark!”

“Yeah?”

“We forgot to agree on what we are betting on”

“Oh, I don’t know, let’s say a day’s worth of meals”

“You’re on”
The trespasser butted in and pointed ad Mark

“Your name is Mark?”

“Uh, yeah, why?”

“Oh, nothing, I’m sure your parents meant well… or they didn’t know”

“Know what?”
The Doctor interrupted

“Sorry, I was just wandering, what would you say if I’d tell you that 504 years ago there was a changeling that opened up a successful restaurant in Equestria?”
The trespasser burst out laughing

“You’re having a laugh ain’t ya mate? Mark? Changelings running a successful restaurant 504 years ago? You should watch out what you say around here, not everyone has a sense of humour like I do”

“Thanks, that’s all I needed to know”
The Trespasser pony resumed his routine and walked away

“Told you, you owe me a day’s worth of meals”

“Hey! That’s not what I meant!”

“Sour grapes… so; let’s meet up here in 30 minutes shall we? there are a few rides that look interesting… see you!” finished the doctor with a growing tone as he quickly grew smaller in a crowd of all sorts of sentient kind and finally dissolved into the background.
Mark wandered in amazement for a few minutes and after a few queries to the masses and a couple weirded out glances at him, he managed to make heads and a bit of tails out the current time and place he’s in and he finally had the time to actually look around and see for himself what this place actually was and the best way he could describe it was... a hot mental mess.
Everything was off from the sky clouds forming a giant 500 in the cloud sky to the soap roads, this place was basically the living embodiment of dad jokes

“Let me get this straight… this place is called Discord’s realm, it’s a theme park of some sort where changelings live and work, and where ponies pay to go to, to have fun??? I can easily say that I did not see this coming, not in a million years, let alone five hundred and four, this is incredible!”
This was great news for Mark, so great that he was nearly in tears; His kind is going to be fine! Ha! What an understatement! They’re going to be more than fine! They’re going to be living in prefect harmony with not only their mortal enemies, ponies but also with gryphons, dragons and even with Discord himself! He heard rumours about Discord being reformed but he had no idea that it was going to be something like this!
Mark was so overwhelmed that he didn’t even notice the moment he got lost and wandered deeper into the candy centre of this entire melting pot of emotional delight that this realm was.
Before he knew it, he was in some sort of museum of history…

“I wander what the Doctor would have to say about museums of history”
A numerous group of young children of all sorts sitting on benches and eating caught Mark’s eye… one filly in specific, It was a small changeling filly, Mark wasn’t sure what it was but he felt like he’s known her from somewhere…
Something in the outmost back part of Mark’s mind told him that he should talk to her… or investigate this whole thing… or something, anything.
Mark began to trot inconspicuously towards her, whistling a generic tune which naturally made him all that more conspicuous.
The tune caught the filly’s ears… and she turned around curious of the tune unaware what was about to happen.
The two met
Mark at once knew that he has always loved her… not as a soul mate or a lover but a different kind of love… as a daughter? No, that’s not right… whatever it was they both knew at once, that their fates have always been intertwined from the dawn of time itself.

“Pacifica”

“Pacifica”

“PACIFICA!”
Third time’s the charm, Sugar’s voice finally reached Pacifica’s consciousness

“Yeah?”

“We’re going now”
Pacifica nodded quietly, grabbed Mark’s hoof and looked at him.
Mark understood instantly that he should just trust her and go with her

“Who’s that?” asked Knuckles

“Friend” replied Pacifica

“Cool, do you work here, sir?”
Mark glanced at Pacifica looking for any signs suggesting what his answer should be and at once he knew what to say

“Yes, yes I do”
The changeling leading the group stopped in front of some sort of painting depicting a mish-mash of interspecies violence happening in a familiar town
Pacifica harshly tugged his hoof, now is the right time to secretly go there, wherever there was supposed to be.
The two sneaked out of the museum, crossed the bridge of trust, stumbled through the house of the living, crept across the complex web of clean soap roads, endured the ice cream snowstorm and finally reached Discord’s shack.

“That’s not a shack” began Mark as he looked up at the towering castle with a giant crooked signs saying DISCORD'S SHACK

“…”

“Oh, right, yeah, I know, Discord, chaos and all that, got it”
As they entered through the main gate, which from the inside happened to be the back exit from the kitchen, Mark was greeted with the pure essence of chaos… everything was in the state of flux, the only thing that remained still in this whirpool of matter was the ever longing taste of joy and fun.
Pacifica initiated a specific dance, Mark knew that recreating every single of her steps was necessary to cross the kitchen, onto the next room.
Pacifica approached a boiling pot full of steaming food, opened it and entered.
Mark did the same.
They came out from under a sofa in a room where some sort of large blue bird was playing a video game with a raccoon.
The two animals looked at the unexpected visitors who emerged from the sofa they were sitting on a few moments ago.
Pacifica just ignored this whole situation completely unsurprised which couldn’t be said about the bird and the raccoon who paused the game looking at the changelings in puzzlement.
Pacifica once again grabbed Mark and walked out onto the park outside.
As they were walking away from the house Mark couldn’t help but to look back and see through the window what seemed to be a red gumball machine shouting

“Go set up the chairs, now! OR YOU’RE FIRED!“
Words could not even begin to describe how weird that scene was, it’s as if they walked out from their universe and ended up in some sort of obscure afternoon cartoon for children that featured adult humour from a different dimension.
A few cameos and video game references later they finally reached their destination, It was the bedroom of none other than Discord himself.

“What now?” blurted out Mark

“…”

“So when is he going to come then?”

“…”

“So we do have a few minutes to spare… tell me, who are you?”

“…”

“You’re right; maybe we should wait for Discord with this… why are we waiting for Discord with this again?”

“…”

“Right, I suppose he does…”
Mark ruffled Pacifica’s hair with his hoof
Pacifica smiled and nearly gave out a girlish giggle... almost.
The oddly not so odd couple awaited the arrival of the one that would clear this whole mess up.

Author's Note:

Oh boy, I began to reread my work as I am going to get back to continuing the saga only to realize just how unedited this chapter was, I apologize everybody, I have fixed all the little errors and spelling mistakes, I still don't know how this could have happened.