• Published 23rd Jan 2013
  • 2,002 Views, 192 Comments

Doing Science - dashie76



You're not safe In this place All of us warned you of the big white face

  • ...
5
 192
 2,002

Chapter 3

May 25th, 2010

Great news, everypony! I finally get to do something interesting!

It turns out that having the Doctor as a friend paid off in the long run. He knew that I've been sad with nothing to do really, (and kind of homesick as well, )so since he's higher in rank than me, he managed to pull a few strings and get me a job working with him on the test chambers.

It's actually a lot different than I expected it to be. I figured that I'd just be totally out of place, surrounded by all of these super smart scientists and all, but they turned out to be pretty cool guys. They all treat me like an equal, just like the Doctor does.

Oh, except for Frosty. He's just kind of a pervert.

Anyways, remember that rumor of a big breakthrough in the test chamber production line I was telling you guys about last time? Well, it turns out those rumors were true. The scientists decided to add a new element to the test chambers they're building.

Oh! Oh! Almost forgot! Part of the intro to this new job is that I got to see a test subject go through a few test chambers.

It.

Blew.

My.

Friggin.

Mind.

Seriously, just imagine it for a minute - what if you had a gun that could rip through the fabric of space-time itself? What if you could make portals in this way? What if you could traverse great distances, solve puzzles, and a ton of other stuff using them? Sounds like science fiction, right?

Not anymore, it's not.

And mind you, I've got no clue how the thing works. But I do know this - all of the walls (well panels, actually) of the test chambers aren't just normal walls. They're made from special materials that conduct portals well, prime among them being lunar rocks. Weird, right? I mean, how much dough did Aperture have to pay to get their hands on so many space rocks? Mountains and mountains of dough, I bet.

Anyways, inside of these test chambers are a number of different things called "elements." With a lowercase "e" so that they don't get confused with the Elements of Harmony. Anyways, these elements include laser beams, which can be potentially fatal, laser catchers, which activate something when a laser goes into them, weighted buttons, which can be activated by a weighted cube or sphere, and deadly goo, which is always fatal once touched. Come to think of it, almost every element is fatal in one way or another. Pretty sure that Aperture is breaking one or two laws with all of that stuff...

Oh yeah, so the job that the Doctor put me on is involved with making new elements for testing. They recently got an idea as to what they should add next - a tractor beam. Totally badass, right? We could fly around in a spaceship, abducting cows and other stuff. That would be so cool...

So all of the scientists were brainstorming how they would go about creating this sort of thing. And this is where I come in - they need someone who can manipulate clouds. Specifically, the clouds' precipitation. You see, they figured out that if they group together the correct amount of hot and cold clouds in the core of the machine, they can create an endless spiral of rain, creating a miniature hurricane. They would also create cloud generators from water condensers and whatnot, so they wouldn't ever run out of hurricanes. I don't see how that sort of thing could possibly work, but they're scientists, so they've got to know what they're doing...

Plus, they have the Doctor on the team. He's better than all of them combined...

...<sigh>...

...Uhh...what? N-Nevermind.

So they need me to gather up some clouds and make them a hurricane in one of the more secluded test chambers. Then they want my opinion on whether or not some of the technology they're implementing would work with the precipitation rate and all of that other science-y stuff. I'll do my best to help them.

So...that's basically what I've been doing for the past week or so. Wake up. Shower and eat. Make some storms with the Doctor. Go to the underground bar. Drink. Eat. Sleep. Repeat. It's actually a pretty busy schedule, so it was hard to find some time to make this video log. I made time, though.

But I still miss Ponyville...Despite everypony at Aperture being welcoming and kind (almost everypony, Cave) I still miss all of my old friends. Pinkie would find the portals totally amusing...Twilight would talk science with the Doctor for hours on end...as much as I hated Aperture in the beginning, there's at least one thing about it for each of my friends that they would like. And Pinkie still sends me a ton of letters. I reply to them, of course. Just told them about the Doctor today. We'll see what their opinion of him is pretty soon -

>knock knock<

Oh...crap. That's probably Cave. Hold on, I gotta take this...

Hello? Come in.

>clack< Oh! Evening, Rainbow.

Oh! Um...Hello, Doctor. What...what are you doing down here this late?

Well, I was going through some files and realized that the power in this room was on. I couldn't tell if it was a glitch or what, so I was just coming down here to check. Why did you say you were here at this time of night?

Um...I had to do my video log...

Ah, yes. Always a bother, that.

Wait...Oh, I'm interrupting, aren't I? It's okay, I can just leave you to finish...

Oh, no, it's cool. Actually, come here for a second...

Hey, guys! Look who decided to drop in!

Um...evening? Afternoon? Rainbow, what time are they watching this at?

I...never really though of that. Hm.

I know! We should make a program that could tell the time of day that the recording is being watched at and generate an appropriate greeting for the viewer!

I don't think that's worth the effort for a greeting, Doctor...

Rule number 32: The most important part of any conversation is the greeting.

More rules, huh...I though you were done after "the Doctor is always right..." and it's not even a conversation...

Hey! It's a conversation! It's just...one sided, is all!

...Okay, that was clever. I'll give you that.

Thanks. But...it really is kind of late, so I should probably get back to my dorm.

Okay...um...let me just stop the recording.

Huh? Why?

We can walk back up together.