N E I R E
Written by RainConsiva
Inspired by SEASON 3, EPISODE 3 of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
As the two remaining Pinkie Pies continued to stare at the wall, Twilight and her friends could feel sweat falling down their cheeks since they were so eager to get their old friend back, the usual jumpy pink colorful pony that spread joy through all of Ponyville and who was the comedian of the group, in a way, Twilight felt like without her the mane six wouldn’t be as close as they are without Pinkie; it simply wouldn’t work without that balance of fun and laughter anymore. Just as the paint was actually beginning to dry, one of the two Pinkie’s seemed to flick her attention onto Twilight, giving her a pleading look as if saying ‘let me stay’, but just as quickly as the clone turned her gaze onto Twilight, she was gone with a zap from Twilight’s horn, floating out the open window of the building and back into the Everfree Forest where she belonged.
The five friends began to cheer, trotting over to Pinkie and giving her hugs, to have Pinkie hug them back and exclaim ‘Yippee!’ in glee from her victory.
Meanwhile, little did the reunited friends knew, they had made..a very large mistake within their test. A single pink pony that they had sent back only a few moments ago was struggling and trying to break through what seemed like the glass side of the underwater world she had been transported in.
“G-guys?” Shouted the usual happy pink pony, but it seemed like her voice was taken over by some kind of dark and sorrowful tone. She slowly felt her frizzy hair begin to fall flat against her shoulder blades, her eyes swelling with tears as she cried out again.
“TWILIGHT?..” The mare shouted, perking her ears up and awaiting a reply but to her dismay, Twilight’s voice did not grace her ear lobes at all. Slowly, just as quickly as her hair became straight, the color of her coat seemed to be slowly draining from her body as well.
“DASHIE?“ The depressed and rather angry pony shouted for one last final attempt at getting contact with her friends, but there was no reply just like she had expected. She ‘swam’ around in the pond, but it wasn’t really a pond since the mare could breath and trot around like normal but there were quite a few fish in the water that seemed to be giving her rather odd looks. As she explored her new ‘home’ she came across a rock that was covered in moss. She ‘sat down’ in front of it and stroked the soft, almost fur like moss. It reminded her of her bed, the bed that this ‘new’ Pinkie Pie would be sleeping in tonight.. She shut her blue eyes as she tried to imagine being in Sugarcube Corner with what she considered her family; Mr. and Mrs. Cake and not to forget the two baby ponies that were introduced into her life just a few months ago.
She slowly allowed her head to fall against what was her new ‘pillow’ and began to rest, dreaming of a better place then such a hell hole like she was in now, a happy place like on a picnic with her friends, and maybe even sitting around on a rainy day and playing with Gummy or the two baby ponies. Without even knowing herself, Pinkie drifted off into a deep sleep.
Meanwhile back in Ponyvile, the ‘other’ Pinkie Pie was making herself at home in Pinkie Pie’s bedroom, going through her closet and checking for anything that was interesting or FUN to her. Surely her ‘sister’ must have something of use that would entertain her. She had only managed to find a slimy ball that was seemingly beginning to run out of air since the mare could easily make it feel squishy between her hooves.
Hearing the noises of the ball, Gummy seemed to run up to Pinkie Pie’s room in a flash and swished his long scaly tail back and forth in excitement of play time but to his dismay it seemed Pinkie was confused by the baby reptiles pressence in Sugarcube Corner. She raised a brow and curiously threw the ball towards Gummy’s direction, only to have it bounce off his head and smack into the wall. The reptile went after it, despite his head hurting and brought it back to Pinkie like a loyal dog. But instead of throwing it again, the pony squished it totally in her hooves until it was flat, then picked up Gummy and let out a giggle before she began to sing.
“The itsy-bitsy spider
Climbed up the water spout
Down came the rain
And washed the spider out
Out came the sun
And dried up all the rain
And the itsy-bitsy spider
Climbed up the spout again”
As the pink pony continued her singing, she had wrapped the squishy ball around Gummy’s neck, giggling rather insanely as the reptile tried to move away from what he called his owner, but this was surely not HIS owner. There was no possible way his master would do this. As the ball became tighter around Gummy’s neck, he only ended up passing out to ‘Pinkie’s dismay. But it was good..She could keep him from telling if she threatened to do this again to him if he would ever ‘tell’ her secret. The mare repeated the same lullaby as she pushed her pet under her bed.
“The itsy-bitsy spider
Climbed up the water spout
Down came the rain
And washed the spider out
Out came the sun
And dried up all the rain
And the itsy-bitsy spider
Climbed up the spout again”
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I'm sorry for such a short chapter but this is just the introduction guys, I promise that the next one is going to be much longer and explain more things. Thank you atleast reading. :)
Mmm I like, reminds me a lot of my story I feel this could shape into a very interesting fic!
1638457
Thank you! I'm glad someone actually enjoys insane Pinkie just as much as I do
"We need an idea for a story."
"Pinkie chokes Gummy until he passes out and/or dies."
".... Go on."
I enjoyed this, even though I shouldn't have.
There's some legitimate potential here.
Pinkamena?
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1638484
Yes.
1638463 Yes indeed! My fic was completely about insane Pinkie and your introduction intrigues my interest greatly! I await impatiently for the next chapter.
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1638488
I plan on making the next chapter soon, or just depending on if this gets popular and people actually enjoy it. So you won't have to wait too long, dear.
Uh, not sure how to react to the sadistic Pinkie clone... Either way it seems to be a pretty neat story. I say keep writing it and I'll be sure to watch it!
1638496
I'm not really sure about the crazy Pinkie either..
But you know, I didn't just want a really depressing story about how the real Pinkie looses her sanity, I wanted the readers to be interested on seeing more of the 'evil' Pie and seeing how she 'blooms' in the story.
It would just seem too boring without it but thanks for the comment
I can imagine insane Pinkie singing that. It gives me the shivers.
1638509
Thank you! I got inspired on how creepy that song was from American Horror House
Hey, no problem. I like the window into the conscience of the 'FUN' seeking Pinkie. Though it does make me a little scared. As the first comment I've ever posted I think that the immediate response is perfect!
1638526
Oh you're welcome, I'm going to try and respond to most of the comments I get. ^^''
And exactly, the 'FUN' seeking Pinkie is Pinkamena. I really just thought of that once I remembered how they were all about 'FUN'.
Also, I promise Gummy isn't dead. Pinkie has plans for him
DON'T WORRY, REGIDAR IS HERE!
I must say, not a huge fan of Pinkamena, but this story's got some potential.
1638588
Don't worry, I'm not really going to ..'over do it' like Cupcakes did with Pinkamena.
But anyways, thank you for reading and commenting
Pies, not Pie's. Apostrophes are used to show possession. Ponyville is misspelled, and the F should not be capitalized in Everfree. Also, this entire paragraph is two sentences, both of which run on and include too many thoughts. Suggest breaking them up.
Out of place periods in the middle of the first sentence. Undercurrent would also be the wrong word to use here, as such a pond has no current.
Ear lobes is... a very odd choice of words there. Plus, "happen to" is out of place.
is not a scary song. If you are trying to capture the creepy sing-song voice trope that horror movies take advantage of, literature is really the wrong medium for it. And the fact that it is used twice really gives the impression it's just there to pad out the story.
Not enough happens in this chapter to judge it for its story content; so far it only uses a couple of recycled tropes and does not have an identity of its own. It asks the question that everybody has already asked, but does not begin to answer it.
1638609
Mmmhmm.
I should have really gotten better proof readers ^^''
And as the chapter states, its an introduction. I didn't want for the chapter to suddenly jump into something truly sad or terrifying. I wanted it to be simple and just give a slight thought on how the rest of the story would go. Anyways, thanks for pointing out the mistakes. I'll be fixing them in a minute.
This fic has been done before, dude, and I really hate repetitive ideas. It was good, but you could have thought up a better plot than "Pinkie was sent to the lake and pinkanema goes around all crazy like forever"
not ready to like this yet, but ill definitely watch it.
1638681
Really? I didn't notice.
And I didn't have much of a better plot, I was trying to base it off what happened in the show to the other Pinkie's.
And I'm hoping to improve myself on the next chapter I'm writing now.
Thanks for the comment and read
I wasnt expectiong this so soon but let's give it a checkup
God oh gawd I HATE THIS
WAAAAAH
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*like*
Actually there have been over a hundred recorded comics and two hundred fanfictions based off this episode and/or concept.
1638798
GUMMY IS ALIVE.
shh...
No tears..Only dreams now..
1638810
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How often will this be updated?
Poor Gummy, I can't stand seeing animals get hurt. I hope this story will be scary but I also hope the poor animals won't get hurt.
1639016
I'm working on the next chapter right now. (:
1639123
Don't worry, I was hesitant to write that up ^^'
This shows why Twilight's "Test" was flawed, the real Pinkie Pie would find it just as hard to watch paint dry as the clones, they should have thought of a better idea.
You hear me Twilight ya darn goofed!
Well, that's a tad morbid. Creepy pie, I don't condone animal abuse do if you ever do something like hat again I'm going to have to cut your eyes out.