Meet the Spy
She ran. She ran as fast as her legs could take her, but it wasn't enough. The dark, ominous figure trailing her matched her pace easily. She tried to push herself further, beyond her limit, but try as she might her body refused to obey her commands. Her pursuer, however, charged forward with an inequine speed, beyond anything she had ever known and ever would.
If she didn't know who it was, she wouldn't be half as afraid.
Out of the blue - or the all-consuming darkness, in this case - a wall loomed before her, bringing her desperate escape to a grinding halt. She spun around, meeting her hunter's gaze of hatred and vengeance with her own. She leapt back against the wall, reaching into her saddlebags - she hadn't realized she had them before, she noted - and pulled out the first thing her hooves came into contact with. The reassuring feel of cold, hard metal against her skin calmed her somewhat, and with a calculated swing she directed the sharp end of the axe towards her enemy's throat, hoping to catch it off guard.
No such luck. Her target dodged the attack with ease, dropping to the ground and pulling out a distinctly unique gun. She flinched away from the flames that licked at the edges of her face, retaliating with a strike to the side of the flamethrower with her axe. Both weapons flew away, clattering to the ground a few meters away from them both, and her attacker jumped onto her bare-hoofed, a predatory grin just visible below the cowl of its hood.
She fought back with all the strength she could muster, reaching into the depths of her skill for the power she needed to save herself. Her movements were quick and precise, matching her opponent blow for blow. The aggressor, however, countered her speed with strength, turning her forelegs to jelly every time a blow was deflected. She bit her lip in an effort to drive the pain out of her mind. But, as she continued to take a beating, it became too much to bear, and she let out a scream of agony as the sound of bone snapping echoed through the air. A second later, she was struck behind her head, forcing her to the ground. She lay there, whimpering in pain, wanting it to stop, and ultimately resigning herself to her fate as the figure trotted over to where their weapons had fallen, retrieved both, and with an almighty heave, brought the blade of the axe down onto her neck.
It cut through the flesh and bone, but not all the way through. Her time, however, was almost up. Her vision began to gray at the edges. With great effort, she gave her executor one last glance, burning the sight of her last moment forever into her mind.
The ice-blue eyes of Pinkie Pie stared back as the flames of Tartarus greedily swallowed her soul.
"Her mask! Where's her mask?!" A voice cried out, and mere moments after Diana's eyes snapped open she realized it was hers.
She sat up, panting heavily. Her hooves subconsciously pulled the blanket towards her neck as her mind desperately grasped for any kind of shield against the terrors of the dark. The sheet of cloth, despite its obvious ineffectiveness in defending against pretty much anything except cold, gave Diana's pounding heart the feeling of safety it so desperately needed to calm down.
As her heavy breathing began to subside, Diana took a look around her, noticing the familiar bedside table, the digital clock - it was three in the morning, she noted - the floor lamp, the messy stack of papers threatening to topple over at any moment, and her ever-present saddlebags leaning against the door, ready to be picked up whenever she had to leave.
Just as she thought she had finally gotten over it, her mind decided to summon the image of the Pyro looming over her, poised to strike the killing blow, and she sighed in exasperation. No way am I getting any more sleep tonight.
She swung her hind legs off the edge of the bed and hopped onto the ground. A walk helped me to clear my mind last time. Maybe it'll work again.
She grabbed the straps of her saddlebags with her teeth and slung it over her back as she pushed the door open, taking a deep breath of air saturated with the smell of disinfectant. Ah, my favourite.
She looked around, examining the corridors. Seeing no sign of life - hardly surprising at this time of night - she trotted out of the room, turned right, and headed down an entire string of similarly deserted corridors before reaching the door that stood between her and the cold of the night.
A moment before her hoof met the doorknob, Diana paused. She hadn't left the base very much, since the only thing that demanded her attention outside were her interviews. She began to wonder if she might be better off going back to bed.
What am I thinking?! Diana suddenly realized. It's not like I'm scared to go out... am I?
Shaking her head, she pushed the door open and was immediately struck by a very strong sense of déjà vu.
It was dark. Very much so. It was the kind of darkness relegated to the realm of dreams and nightmares. It was all-encompassing, wrapping Diana in its cold embrace, as if welcoming her into the night.
She shivered. She had learned a long time ago to fear the night, along with its executioner of its will. Where RED team had their Sniper, BLU had their Pyro.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw something to her right shift slightly. Reaching into her saddlebags, she slowly drew out the fire axe, positioning it defensively as she edged closer towards the safety of the base.
Again, she noticed a flicker of movement from the same spot as earlier. Finally, deciding the time to reveal itself had come, a cloaked figure leapt out from the shadows and dashed towards Diana. Instinctively, she raised her axe, preparing for the seemingly inevitable attack, but to her utter surprise the unknown equine - if it even was equine - sped past her and into the base. Diana almost chased after it for a moment, but decided not to be hasty. Moving cautiously, she re-entered the structure. In her search for the missing intruder, she nearly slipped on the cloak that lay spread out on the ground.
Diana bent down and examined the cloak. It seemed fairly standard, being of Equestrian origin and coloured a plain black. What troubled her, however, was a lock of hair stuck in the fabric of the hood.
It was a purple curl of hair. Spy...
"I apologize for having to contact you at this late hour, Diana, but I had no choice. Only six hours remain before your interview with me, and I have to make a request."
Diana spun around quickly, nearly smacking the BLU Spy behind her in the cheek. "Sorry." She grimaced. "It's a habit to react violently when Spies appear behind me."
"Understandable." The Spy nodded. "Now, I came to ask if you could interview my counterpart on RED instead of me."
Diana frowned. "Why?"
"Those... are BLU team secrets. But I can assure you they are acceptable."
"And I can trust you because?"
"Don't worry, the Administrator already approved of them." A piece of paper, enveloped in a translucent blue aura, floated its way over to Diana. "Signed and stamped."
"What?!" Diana snatched the paper out of the air, scanning it intensely. "How?! When?!"
"Yesterday. He told me to come look for you at this time, for some reason that I didn't know, but it turns out that he was right." The Spy stared concernedly at Diana's troubled expression. "Is something the matter?"
"No... nothing." How did he know I would be here at this time of night? "Nothing of consequence, anyway."
"Alright then. That's all you need to know, so I suppose I'll be leaving now."
"Goodbye." Time to hunt down an intruder.
Then again, if the Administrator managed to predict my location at three in the morning, there's no way he wouldn't be able to deal with a simple problem like this.
"Hold on. I just remembered that I have one more thing I needed to ask you." The Spy said.
"What?" Diana asked.
"It's... Could you do me a favour?"
"What exactly does this 'favour' entail?" Whatever it is, I doubt it's going to be simple.
"Well... maybe we should talk somewhere else."
Diana raised an eyebrow. "Why?"
"Just a few precautions to make sure RED team won't hear us."
This is going to be a long night.
A few hours later
"...and this is our control room." The RED Spy's voice, having been reduced by her preoccupied mind to an irritating buzzing, hovered in Diana's ear for a brief moment before dissipating into nothingness, as had all the other noises before it.
"Interesting." Diana responded automatically. "These headquarters are quite technologically advanced. The last time I visited BLU's main base even the lights refused to work."
"Well, what did you expect of them?" A brief smile and a disdainful shake of the head accompanied her words. "It is inconceivable that a mere second-rate princess would be able to equip her forces as well as ours."
"Rarity - you don't mind if I call you that, do you?"
"Of course not."
"Alright then. Rarity, may I ask you a question?"
"I don't see why not. This is my interview, after all."
"Yes... So, why do believe so strongly in RED team? How is it different from BLU to you?"
"Hm..." Rarity thought over the question. "You've heard Twilight's reasons already, haven't you?"
"Yes, I have. Are yours similar to hers?"
"... Somewhat. I'm willing to admit, though, that the pay is half the reason."
Diana shrugged. "I can't blame you. I've seen that paycheck."
"The other half... let's just say that I don't take kindly to traitors."
"Traitors?" Diana asked curiously.
"Surely you know the story. When Equestria was divided into north and south, Republic and Empire?"
"Oh. That story."
"It's a component of our history class in school." Rarity said. "The Empire is very harsh on those who betray it, and I guess that some of that rubbed off on me."
"Some might say that extreme measures are necessary to bring about freedom."
"I am not one of them." Rarity stated. "As for the 'freedom' part of it... To be honest, I agree with Twilight's point of view for this one. It seems far too inefficient to be practical."
"Different ponies see things differently." Diana nodded. "So this is your reason, then?"
"Correct." Rarity smiled an insincere smile, the kind of smile one used to change the topic of conversation. "We've been talking too long, I think; it's already midday and we're not even half done with your tour of the base."
"Really?" Diana asked, surprised. "I didn't even notice."
"Time flies when you're preoccupied, does it not?" Rarity gave another one of those conversation-rerouting smiles as she trotted away, Diana close behind her. "Come, our next stop is the central communications room."
"You mean you don't usually communicate from this control room?"
"We do, but the central communications room is where we hold our meetings with the Princess herself, to update her on the battlefield situation." Rarity explained. "She likes to be informed on the latest developments as soon as possible."
"Ah, now I understand."
"That's good." Rarity drew to a halt as her leisured pace brought her to a three-way corridor. "Almost all routes from the entrance to our base go through the atrium - that's the room to the right, by the way - so that's where the Engineer's set up her sentry."
"Alone?" Diana asked. "Won't it be dangerous if she's killed before she alerts anypony of the danger?"
"Usually the Pyro would be with her, but the Administrator summoned her for some reason. It's only for today anyway, I doubt BLU will be able to take advantage of this before it's over."
"Shall I mention a possibility?" Diana asked.
"Why not? Go ahead."
"Thank you. Now, suppose that the Administrator never summoned the Pyro."
"What? That's impossible. Pinkie even got the note from him."
"Say, somepony forged his handwriting."
"But... but that's..."
"Not all that impossible, really. And think about it. What reason would the Administrator have to remove the Pyro from her normal duties in this base?"
Rarity's eyes narrowed. "You seem to know a lot more than you should."
"I've been hanging around the Administrator a lot; I know what orders he gives and what orders he doesn't." Diana shrugged. "Besides, haven't you noticed that there's absolutely no noise coming from the right?"
"Wouldn't that be normal?"
"Maybe... if there weren't supposed to be a sentry there."
Rarity glanced to her right, threw an incredulous look in Diana's direction, and sped off down the corridor, Diana hot on her heels.
"My room as as safe as it gets. Now what favour was it that you wanted?"
"I have a plan. A plan to give the REDs a whole lot of trouble."
"I can't agree to that. Not without the Administrator's permission."
"I've already seen to that. He's agreed to help me in any way he can."
"Those ways being..."
"A written order to RED team's Pyro, temporarily disabling their respawn points, and a personal command for you to assist me in my operations."
"... Do you have any proof?"
"Here. It's signed, too."
"..."
"Well? Are you going to disobey him?"
"..."
"Is that a yes?"
"..."
"..."
"... Fine, I'll go along with your plan. What do I have to do?"
"Here's the first part. You're going to need to keep the RED Spy occupied for a while. Anything to make sure she doesn't go into the atrium until it's too late..."
Rarity entered the room first, allowing Diana a brief glimpse of the scene beyond before the doors once again swung shut. Moments later, her own hooves reached out to push said doors open, and the gruesome corpse of RED's Engineer, surrounded by the remains of her contraptions, greeted her gaze. It took her a second to notice Rarity kneeling near the body.
"The wires aren't charged anymore." The unicorn murmured. "Her face is cold... blood's almost all gone..." Her gaze turned towards the pool of crimson fluid near the wound in the victim's back. "She's been dead for a while." She turned to Diana. "She should have respawned by now. Why is her body still here?"
"Who's to say BLU hasn't sabotaged it? They've obviously planned this in advance."
"Grr..." Rarity's horn flashed, and a small microphone appeared by her side. "Attention, RED team." Her voice boomed through the public announcement system, startling an unprepared Diana. "Intruder alert! A BLU Spy is in the base!" She paused to take a breath. "All mercenaries available will commence a thorough search of the base. Leave no stone unturned."
"In addition," another voice came through the P.A. system, "you are to ensure that your intelligence remains in your team's control. At all costs."
"Is that... the Administrator?" Rarity asked disbelievingly.
"Yes." Diana confirmed. I thought this might happen. The BLU Spy was a fool for believing that the Administrator would be wholly on her side. He'll stir up chaos wherever and whenever he can.
"How did he know about this?"
"You forget that he can he can hear and see everything that happens in both teams' bases." Diana reminded her. "He's aware of all the latest developments."
"Rarity!" The RED Soldier's voice behind her was unexpected, but Diana had been surprised too many times already to have any more shock to show.
"Yes?" The Spy asked wearily.
"Come on, we have to go find the BLU Spy! There's no telling what she's already done to sabotage us!" His eyes drifted over to the mess. "Other than, well, this."
Rarity sighed. "You're right. Let's go, Diana."
"Alright. Where to?"
"The intelligence room. Where else?"
"Is that the most important thing in this whole base?"
"Undoubtedly." Rarity nodded. "She could damage the electrical equipment, sure, but that can all be repaired with little effort. But if she gets the intelligence briefcase..." The unicorn shuddered. "... She'll know all our plans for the next year. We'll have to change everything; battle plans, targeted installations, fortifications... everything. RED team will be fighting with poorly thought out tactics and long-term strategy since the best we can do is to try to make things up as we go along. It'll be a complete disaster if their Spy gets out of here with that briefcase."
"I see." Diana indicated her understanding with a slight nod. "Shall we get going, then?"
"Let's go."
"The Engineer isn't their only line of defense, you know."
"I know. I'm going to have to backstab my way to success."
"Why don't you have your team's backup?"
"They're busy packing up and moving base. Canterlot Valley's no longer a good place to be."
"But you still think you can do this? Alone?"
"If I didn't, I wouldn't be here now."
"But that's madness. How can you take on the whole of RED team by yourself?"
"All at once? I don't stand a chance. What about one by one, from behind?"
"That's going to require top-notch hiding, manoeuvering and backstabbing. And, now that I think about it, top-notch is a gross understatement."
"Just trust me, darling. If I didn't think I could do it, I wouldn't be here."
"Then the very fact that you are here says something about your estimation of your own abilities."
"You know, you don't need to worry for me. Making sure things go as planned is my problem. All you need to do is stick to the plan and BLU team will be indebted to you."
"Why should I care? I work for the Administrator; I don't need BLU's gratitude."
"Because the Administrator already assigned you to this, and now you have to care whether you like it or not."
"... Fine. What is your final objective, at any rate?"
"Let's just say that BLU needs some intelligence to win this war."
The Soldier had long since charged ahead of the other two, Rarity moving slower so as to give herself more time to conceive of a counter-plan that would allow her to eliminate the BLU Spy. Diana, being her interviewer, couldn't just leave her alone, and so had stuck by her side, taking mental notes of whatever her interviewee subconsciously murmured under her breath.
"... Tribalmare's Shiv... Jarate... Southern Hospitality... Three-Rune Blade... Mad Milk... What else have we got?" She muttered. "We should have invested in anti-Spy security systems in the base..."
Diana coughed. "Sorry to interrupt, but it seems that we have arrived."
"Hm?" Rarity looked up, immediately noticing the large INTELLIGENCE sign hanging over the open door. "Ah. Thank you."
"No problem." Diana peered in and caught sight of a Scout, Soldier and Heavy in the midst of a conversation. The intelligence briefcase sat on the table in the centre of the three, apparently untouched.
Apparently, of course, being the key word.
"Ahem." Rarity instantly caught their attention. "I see the briefcase is safe?"
"Safe and sound." The Soldier said, and the Scout and Heavy nodded their assent.
"Okay. Tell me: DId anypony happen to kill a BLU Spy on the way here?"
The Scout looked over at the other two, who both shook their heads in unison, before shrugging herself.
"Unfortunate." Rarity looked around. "Then we still have a problem."
"But there's no way anypony's gonna be able to take the intel with us here!" The Scout pointed out.
"She's got a point." The Heavy agreed. "We can always wait this one out."
"I don't suppose either of you have considered the possibility that the BLU Spy has allied backup?" Rarity retorted.
"... Well, that's possible, I guess." The Scout conceded.
Rarity facehooved. "Thankfully Twilight's in charge of tactics and not you, Rainbow."
"Hey, I'm not that dumb."
Unpleasant memories of ill-timed arguments between allies flashed through Diana's head. "Perhaps this is not the best time to debate Rainbow's intelligence."
"True." Rarity turned to the table, the briefcase still sitting safely upon its beige surface. "Speaking of intelligence, is the lock on that still unbroken?"
"It's not broken." Rainbow assured her. "But we don't know if somepony already hacked it and took the papers out."
"Then what are you waiting for? Open that thing already and check!"
"Alright, alright, geez. No need to be so huffy about it."
"Just give me that." Rarity's horn flared, and the briefcase floated its way over to her. Numbers, aided by her telekinetic touch, lined up - 026 was the combination, Diana noted - and with a soft click, the two halves swung open on their hinges, exposing the untouched intelligence papers.
"Thank goodness." Rarity sighed. "They're still here."
"So... what do we do now?" The Heavy asked.
"We brainstorm. The Spy can't get the intelligence if we're all guarding it, so we may as well think of a few ways to purge that rat from our base while we wait for the Pyro to get back."
Rainbow groaned. "Really? That's totally boring!"
"I suppose you have a better plan then." Rarity retorted.
"Yeah! I can go around splashing Milk everywhere!"
"...Alright, a few things. Firstly, since I've never figured out how you managed to have a seemingly endless supply of Mad Milk, let me just say that this base is really big, and I don't think we have enough time or milk to clear everything."
"The Administrator said it's chaos magic. Every time I throw a bottle I magically get a new one after about twenty seconds. Neat, huh?"
"...Yeah, alright. Secondly, the Spy will probably see you coming from a mile away and move around to avoid you. She could even move back into the areas you checked earlier since you're only clearing the base once."
"Well, there's that, but otherwise it's a good plan, right?"
"And thirdly, keep in mind that there's probably a whole team behind that Spy, and running around the base alone isn't the best idea in these circumstances."
"So what? We stay here and let them kill us when they finally come?"
"The defenders often have an edge." Rarity noted. "We have the preparation time we need, and Zecora should soon be here to set up our stickybomb defenses."
"... Hmph." Rainbow trotted over the corner of the room to sulk.
"Ignore her." Rarity said. "I don't think she'll be of much use for the planning phase anyway."
Diana heard a nearly inaudible grumble, but otherwise Rainbow gave no indication that she had heard anything.
"Alright, let's begin. Anypony got any idea?"
"We could always fill the briefcase with fake intel papers." The Soldier suggested.
"Smart idea, but for that we'd need a computer, a printer, and enough time to think of plausible but false data. It's not possible as of now."
"What about if we just lock it and leave it here but take out the papers first?" The Heavy asked.
"There are a lot of papers in that thing. The Spy's bound to notice the difference."
"How do you know that it's going to be the Spy who picks it up?" Diana asked. "They just might have their whole team here, remember?"
"... While you are right," Rarity began, "what difference will it make?"
"Well, all a Spy carries is a revolver, a knife, and a cigarette case, so they don't tend to be very strong." She looked at Rarity. "No offense."
"None taken. Continue."
"Right. So, a difference in weight is more noticeable for Spies. But if, say, a Heavy picks it up, he may not be able to tell the difference between a really light object and a really really light object."
"But that depends a little too much on luck, don't you think?" Rarity replied.
"In the absence of any better ideas..."
"We'll have to rely on that. There aren't many places to hide things around here, so it's going to be tough to conceal these papers."
"Uh, ah don't mean to interrupt," The Heavy said, "but how long has it been since ya sent out the announcement, Rarity?"
"Quite a while. Why?"
"... Ah guess it's worth mentioning that the rest of our team should be here by now."
Rarity looked around, noting the stark absence of a Sniper, Medic and Demomare. "Oh horseapples."
"... Let me get this straight. You're trying to get the RED intel... alone."
"That sounds about right, yes."
"Hasn't it occurred to your team that there may be more important things than packing up the base?"
"Believe me, if I could bring them along I would. But the Administrator refused to help unless I went in alone."
"To equalize the odds, no doubt."
"Probably."
"Not, of course, that the odds are in any way fair."
"..."
"So, since the Administrator offered my assistance without my consent, what is my role in this crazy scheme of yours?"
"... All you need to do is interview the RED Spy and keep her attention away from me."
"You'll be disguised, then?"
"Undoubtedly."
"As who?"
"... One last thing I need to confirm with you, Diana."
"What?"
"Just after your first interview, the Administrator gave you instructions to kill somepony, did he not?"
"That's none of your business."
"Did he?"
"What part of 'none of your business' didn't you understand?"
"Forget it then. I just want to know if that pony is dead."
"Which pony?"
"You know who I'm talking about."
"..."
"Well?"
"..."
"The Administrator won't be happy if you refuse to comply."
"... Yes."
"Yes?"
"That pony is dead. Completely dead. Is that what you wanted? Are you happy now?"
"Very. I'll see you tomorrow, then."
"Screw off. I don't want to see your face."
"That's just as well. It won't be my face you'll see later."
"..."
"Goodnight. I shall take my leave now."
"..."
*creak* *click*
"... Forgive me, my friend..."
"So we have no reinforcements." Rarity groaned and buried her face in her hooves. "Great, just great."
"Now is not the time to give up." Diana reminded her gently. "Now is the time to plan. What can we do?"
"I don't think we have a choice any more. We need to move out now and fight our way past whatever we have to. We know this base better than they do; we can use that to our advantage." She gazed over at the corner where the Scout still sat, watching the wall. "Rainbow, you're following us too. Don't forget that."
"We finally going to fight now?"
Rarity very nearly smashed her head against the wall in frustration. "Yes, we are."
Rainbow instantly leapt up in excitement. "Yes! Finally!" She whipped her scattergun out from the satchel slung over her back. "Let's go!"
"Don't go too fast." Rarity cautioned. "We need to stick together, and we can't be sure that you won't get killed out there if you're alone."
"But- but- what if-"
"No." Rarity said flatly.
"... Fine, fine, whatever."
"Alright, let's move." Rarity gestured to the briefcase. "Who's going to carry it?"
"Ah will." The Heavy volunteered. "Ah'm the strongest here anyway."
A brief flash of suspicion appeared in Rarity's eyes before they returned to their original state. "Good. We're all set, it seems."
"Apparently." Diana nodded. "We'd better get a move on before BLU team cuts off all our escape routes - if they haven't already."
"Agreed. Shall we?"
"Right away." The Soldier, rocket launcher in hand, led the team out of the intelligence room.
"Wait!" Rainbow shouted. Everypony turned to face her. "If I can't run ahead, then can I at least stay in front?"
"If anything," Diana told her, "the Heavy should stay in front because he's the toughest of us all."
"But he's carrying the intel!" Rainbow countered.
"Good point." Rarity said quickly. "Big Mac, give the briefcase to Diana."
He tried to object. "But... but ah'm-"
"Give it to her." Rarity snapped. "Now."
Slowly and wordlessly, he handed the intelligence to Diana, who accepted it politely and slung it on her back. She cast a glance over at the Heavy, whose disappointment was clear on his face. I'm guessing that Rarity suspects that he's the Spy. Unsurprising, really.
"We don't have all day." The Soldier marched forward. "We need to leave this place now."
"Let's go let's go!" Rainbow said.
"Okay, seems like we're all armed." Diana let the handle of the fire axe jut out from inside the saddlebags for easy retrieval. "If we're going to have to fight our way through we'd better try to blitz them and catch them unawares."
"Good thinking. Also, wait here a second, please." With a soft "shh" and a hoof on her lips Rarity faded into nothingness, vanishing behind the invisible screen of her cloak.
She's going to scout ahead, I bet. Wonder what that's going to turn out...
She waited. And waited. And waited some more. Seconds stretched into minutes, and a good while later Rarity still hadn't returned.
"Uh..." Big Mac looked around. "Do ya think she's... ya know... dead?"
"I don't know." Diana said cautiously. "We probably should have thought a little more before letting her go like that."
"But she seemed so... confident." Rainbow frowned. "And besides, who could kill her while she was cloaked?"
"Their Pyro, for one." Diana pointed out.
"How would she know when to start spitting flames at an invisible Spy?"
"It's likely that BLU brought along some extra supplies for such a massive raid." Diana explained. "Extra ammunition, gas tanks, possibly more weapons than they know what to do with..." She shrugged. "If they'd had the time they might even have decided to bring the fight to your base with their own makeshift respawn point."
"That... does not sound good." The Soldier muttered. "At all."
"If Rarity's gone, our only hope is to storm the respawn point, if they have one, and destroy it as quickly as possible. That might just end the offensive. Either that, or we try to fix this base's respawn points and allow the rest of our team to respawn. Unfortunately..." Diana shook her head. "I don't think any of us are mechanically or magically well-versed enough to perform such a feat."
"Better ta die tryin' than with regrets." Big Mac wore a sad smile.
"Amen to that." The Soldier gestured forward with the muzzle of his rocket launcher. "Charge!"
"Wait. We need to move silently, otherwise we'll have the whole BLU team on our tails." Diana warned. "We don't know how Rarity died, but I'd rather not join her, and neither, I think, do you."
"I don't want to die either..." Rainbow shrugged. "Well, not without a respawn point at least."
"Quietly. Got it." The Soldier stepped forward and glanced around the corner. "Nothing yet. Let's move on."
"Carefully." Diana added.
"Yeah, that." He moved further forward, followed closely by Big Mac and somewhat less closely by Diana and Rainbow.
Complete and utter silence was their only companion - something which Diana knew would eventually arouse the suspicion of the REDs - as they traveled through the base. The next turn was a fork, and since this wasn't her base, after all, she trusted that The Soldier would know the way better than she would. His constant contemplation of which route to take, though, didn't help to boost her confidence.
He chose to go right, which, if Diana remembered correctly, was in the exact opposite direction of the atrium. And since the atrium was absolutely certain to connect to a route that would lead them out of the base, clearly escape was not on their guide's mind. She would have asked him what his destination was, but he seemed to have enough trouble deciding on which way to go and distracting him with questions probably wouldn't go too well.
He should know what he's doing... I hope...
A few turns later, the oppressive silence became painfully awkward. "Um... ah know we've been walking fer a while now, and, well... where's the enemy team?"
"I was just wondering that myself." Diana lied. "Anypony have any ideas?"
"They might be waiting outside to kill us when we finally come out." Rainbow guessed.
"What's the point of that? Their Spy's already come in and shut down their defenses. Why just stay outside?"
"Beats me. Maybe Pinkie's making up their strategy."
Diana's eye twitched once, and after that her face remained completely still.
"So... Spike, where exactly are you taking us?" Rainbow asked. "I think we've been through this corridor at least thrice."
"I'm going to our respawn points, but... I may be a little lost." He admitted. "I was hoping that one of us could fix it, or maybe the Engineer would have left the operational manual in the central respawn room somewhere after the latest maintenance."
Rainbow raised an eyebrow. "Why would she do that?"
"Because according to her, that's where she usually leaves it after she checks it every month, though she's never told me exactly where in that room she puts it." Spike explained.
"Look, maybe ah know the way better than ya do." Big Mac cut in. "Could ah lead fer a while?"
"Go ahead, it's not like I'm doing a good job of it."
"Thank ya kindly." He surveyed the area. "Now, if mah memory serves me correctly, we should be going... that way."
Diana followed the direction of his gaze. "That's back where we came from."
"Ah was going ta say somethin', but I thought Spike knew what he was doin'."
"Well maybe you should have checked first." Spike retorted.
"This is a bad time for an argument." Diana muttered. "Like, really bad."
"She's right you know." As earnest as Rainbow's attempt was, it really didn't seem to be working.
"Well maybe ya shoulda told us that ya'll were clueless!"
"Well maybe you should have said something before letting an idiot lead the way!"
"Well maybe ya'll could've-"
"You know," a new voice interrupted, "the two of you are incredibly noisy. If there were a BLU team here they probably would've found and killed you all by now."
It took all of one second for Diana's hoof to snap upwards, travel across a one-hundred-and-eighty-degree arc and smack the pony behind her in the cheek. Hard.
"... Um, my apologies." Diana grimaced. "I have this instinct, see... with Spies appearing behind me without warning..."
"No, no, I understand. It wasn't the best idea to sneak up on you all unnoticed." Diana finally turned to face her victim, and she instantly froze.
The ice-blue eyes of Pinkie Pie, cold as the night, stared back into hers.
Diana let out a scream of terror and leapt back, snatching her axe out of her saddlebag and very nearly throwing it at the pony she confronted before her rational thought processes took over and told her that it was nothing more than the RED Spy in disguise.
Probably.
She looked around and immediately noticed that all eyes were on her.
"Uh... about that..." There's no way I can tell them this is all because of a dream. "... I had a run in with her recently, and it wasn't pretty."
"Really now?" Pinkie-Spy cocked her head, and the sheer accuracy of what she assumed was a disguise - right down to the murderous gleam in her eyes - sent chills down her spine.
She slowly realized that she should probably respond. "... Yes."
"Hm, I haven't actually seen you lose a fight before." The Pyro - Spy? Pyro? Spyro? - chuckled. "Wonder what that was like."
"... Uh, bloody. And gory. And painful." Diana helpfully supplied.
"I guessed as much."
"...Yeah." Damn it, stop staring into those eyes! You're just going to be even more afraid! Just... look at the rest of her.
That didn't help as much as she thought it would. The moment she averted her attention from the ice-cold irises, she was immediately struck by how identical the rest of the disguise was compared to the real Pinkie. The cotton candy mane and tail, the cutie mark on her flank, even the posture of her body was exactly like the being she had come to fear. Involuntarily, she took a step back.
Thankfully, Pinkie didn't seem to be paying attention to her anymore. "I have good news, everypony. Firstly, there is no BLU team here. The only one here is their Spy."
"While that's a relief, why in Tartarus would they just send their Spy here and abandon her? On such an important mission at that?" Big Mac asked.
"I can't say I know why," She confessed, "but I do know what the circumstances are, and I can tell you with absolute certainty that there is no team supporting this Spy. If there was, I would have come across them by now. I've walked all over the base and outside too, and there are clearly no other enemies in the vicinity of this base."
"Well, if ya say so."
"Secondly, I know who the Spy is."
"What?!" Everypony, with the exception of a still-shaken Diana, exclaimed in unison.
"I did a little bit of thinking when I was wandering around, and more importantly I returned to the control room and checked the records. I know exactly who's entered and exited this base in the past week."
Out of the corner of Diana's eye, somepony stiffened.
"One of us is a disguised Spy. The same one who left the base past midnight this morning..."
Diana spared the masked BLU Spy a glance out of the corner of her eye. She's been through a lot. Too much. I suppose I should allow her the joy of triumph. For now.
"... That pony who came back at about half past four, sneaking into the base, hoping that no one would notice..."
But what can I do? I can't just stop Rarity from talking.
"... The pony who's, at this very moment, trying to think of a way to kill us all..."
I could always try to shut her up by force, but how can I justify attacking her?
"... The one who, like me, is hiding behind a mask, wondering how to lie her way out of this..."
Time's up. I have to act. It's now or never.
"... That pony, my friends, is-"
"SPY!" Diana screamed, and with an almighty swing the blade of her axe cleaved through the neck of a very shocked Pinkie with ease. The headless body swayed on its legs for all of two seconds before toppling to the ground, staining the floor of the base with crimson blood.
"Whoa whoa whoa!" Rainbow shouted, her sudden spike of adrenalin fueling her huge jump backwards. "What was that?!"
"It was obvious!" Diana protested. "She's the BLU Spy!"
"What?" Big Mac asked. "How do ya know?"
"The way she was accusing somepony else, trying to divert attention from herself... the real Rarity could've been backstabbed at any time and we wouldn't have known!"
"But-"
"Look! Just watch! She'll turn blue any second now!" Come on, now is the best time to kill them off, Spy...
"I don't know." Spike said doubtfully, staring intently at the body as the image of the Pyro faded to that of the RED Spy's. "I can't see-"
*shlck*
He stopped mid-sentence, his eyes rolling into the back of his head as he fell forward, limp.
"Spike!" Big Mac shouted.
*shlck*
Big Mac immediately followed suit, his scream dying in his throat as a blue telekinetic aura clamped his mouth shut.
Diana just stared at the two fallen mercenaries, her heart still beating wildly. I did it... I'm not sure if I should be relieved or infuriated.
"Thank you for help." The earth pony looked up, seeing the last vestiges of Rainbow's prismatic mane dissipate as the perfectly styled purple mane of the BLU Spy took its place. "Princess Luna will be very pleased to see this briefcase."
"Tell her to send her thanks elsewhere." Diana growled. "I neither need nor want her gratitude."
The Spy stared at her for a few seconds, examining her face with a dispassionate gaze before finally turning and heading back the way they had come.
Diana got up, took one last look at the retreating back of the unicorn, and trotted off in the opposite direction.
Luna is going to be a lot friendlier with the Administrator now, for trying to help if nothing else. Let's see what she says when she doesn't get to open that briefcase after all.
The BLU Spy and I both got what we wanted. How long she holds on to her prize... now that's a different story altogether.
By the time she'd reached the end of the corridor, she had already come up with the first half of the letter she was going to write to the Administrator, and she allowed herself a brief but satisfying smile.
Dear Rarity:
If you receive this early in the morning, do not find it odd; I am writing this just a half-hour after midnight. Sleep has eluded me for the past few hours, and I decided upon this course of action to alleviate the guilt that eats away at me.
I really, truly apologize for my actions yesterday. I had misjudged the situation terribly. It is my fault, and my fault alone, that you lost the intelligence to BLU. But I am writing to you now because I have the audacity to beg for your pardon.
Forgive me, please, for I am truly sorry for my actions. And to prove my sincerity... check the base's mailbox tomorrow. You'll find a package from me.
The code will be 026. That should be all you need to know.
Signed,
Diana
Administrator:
Enclosed are my report on the intelligence theft and the RED Spy's interview. However, before you read it, there are two things I need you to know.
Firstly, the interview has not revealed very much about Rarity's potential as an Element of Harmony. However, based on previous, unrecorded meetings, I am confident in asserting that she embodies the spirit of Generosity, and is thus somepony to be wary of. I'll send you the details of these meetings in short order, but that will be for a later message.
Secondly, I think enough chaos has been caused around here. You've succeeded in stirring up more feelings of animosity between RED and BLU... again... but if you want this war to continue then it is imperative that neither side gains a prolonged upper hand.
The BLU Spy is currently en route to the temporary headquarters - the whole team is moving in with us at the main base for a while, I'm given to understand - with the RED intel. Luna will already appreciate your assistance with the appropriation of the intel, so were the Spy to, say, die from what she assumes is an enemy ambush, it would be attributed to her incompetence and nothing else. Certainly nothing to do with you.
She has been traveling for a few hours already. She will be tired. She will be firmly in your grasp.
I trust you know what to do.
Signed,
Diana
Dear Diana:
I must admit, when I received your message yesterday I was very sceptical. However, it is admittedly difficult to argue with results. Everypony on RED team is immensely grateful for your assistance. From what the Administrator told me, the BLU Spy was intercepted on the way to her base, and as such there was no opportunity for her to make copies of these documents. I assume that the Administrator's quick work with shutting down that thief was your doing, otherwise such an immediate response would have been impossible.
You must know, however, that had you failed to retrieved the intelligence I would have forgiven you anyway. This world is cruel, my friend, and we stand more to gain by making allies than enemies. Your intentions were good, and it was only the conspiracy theories conjured from the depths of your mind that led you to the wrong conclusion. I am most pleased, therefore, to add you to my circle of close friends.
'Forgive and Forget' is what many ponies - the idealists, at least - tend to say. I, personally, am incapable of forgetting, but I am always forgiving. Always. It's in my nature, truth be told.
Until we meet again.
Rarity
Dear Diary:
It's my interview tomorrow.
I'm scared.
Pinkie Pie
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What are you? President of her fan club? *Chuckles*
No. That would be your father.
What the?! *Random Gibberish*
Indeed. And now's she here to f*ck us! So listen up girl. Or pornography staring your father will be the second worst thing that happens to you today.
3270292 So much dat O.O
Cannot waaaait to hear the truuuuuth of everything in the last chaaaapteeeer... MOAR!
3270292
I follow you for that comment alone.
3276194 Well someone had to do it.
Also:
She could be in this very ROOM. It could be you. It could be ME. It could even be *Head Shot*
Wow, wow, wow!
What? It was obvious! She's the BLU Spy! Watch she'll turn BLU any second now. Any second now.
3276245
It seems we still hava Problem....
3276340 (Meant to put Spike for Soldier).
Big Problem. *Sigh* alright who's ready to go "find" this spy?
Right behind you.
Raven: RED Rarity's mistake was talking too much like that. Get the kill done, then elaborate and gloat. I admit she earned the right to gloat and enjoy her triumph, but a true professional wouldn't waste any time.
Dr. X: Indeed. The Spy is the one who truly appears to be the most competent of the nine mercenaries, with the Sniper being right after him. Regarding the Pyro, however........ That is an entirely different case.
Raven: True. Now, I just got one last thing to say.............. Pinkamena's scared??? Of what?? Of the mask getting taken off??? Well, anyways, I just want one thing in the next chapter......... ~Do you believe in maaagic? In a young mare's heart! How the music can free her, whenever it starts! Then it's maaagiiic!~
3295734
Ha ha... ha... yeah... the next chapter... um... yeah... it might not be Meet the Pyro. Or at least not the whole thing.
Because, you know, Medic was 20,000 words long. That wasn't even the epic finale. Pyro, however, is, and that means that it probably maybe perhaps possibly might be longer. And in different parts. And also not very soon. Sorry about that.
3298807
Raven: ....... Oh, no. No no no. No need to be sorry. I understand. Yup. I do. I totally do. No hard feelings........... Who am I kidding? SLENDY!!!
3298858
AAAAHHHHH... Wait, I can just delete your comment and then I'll be safe! I just need to press that button right there, and you'll be GONE! FOREVER! *Insert evil laugh here*
Any last words before I kill you, comment #156?
3299426
Raven: Yeah. The only fault in your plan is that I can comment again and again and again and again to the very end of time itself. I can also message you the same amount of times too. Either way, it's too late for you to do anything. Slendy's watching you right now. One wrong muscle twitch, one suspicious blink, one inhale or exhale that smells of your misplaced schemes and thoughts.......... and KABLOWEE! Just kiddin'. You'll wish you just went kablowee.
3299569
NOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo...
I'll get you next time. Just you wait. When you post a story sometime I'm going to comment on it to the end of time! Nothing will stop me! NOTHING!
3299911
Raven: I don't mind, so long it's not one of those stupid hating comments or anything of the sort.
3300046
... I've lost my will to spam comments on your as of yet nonexistent stories. Damn it.
3304252
Raven: Good. Now, get back to working on that chapter, 'cause you're being watched.
3304319
Watched? Uh oh. Looks like I'm in danger. I'd better get runni- Oh wait. You probably meant the people who are following my story.
Uh... forget I said anything.
Anyway, sorry (again) in advance because I'm really going to have to bury my head in revision next week for the last leg of my exams and I've got a camp over the weekend, which sucks because I was looking forward to getting a chance to rest. Oh well.
On the plus side, after that I'm free for a while with no exams to worry about, so I can really get writing.
3308566
Raven: ........ Oh, sure. It's alright. No hard feelings. Nothin' to worry about.......... Who am I kiddin'? I'm getting the guy I assigned to watch you to kill you. SLENDY!!!
3308629
Something tells me we're going around in circles...
...
...
...
... Nah, it's just me.
3308706
Raven: Just get back to the chapter ASAP, or else Slendy will kill you. Ya hear me?
3309336
*gulps*
... Yes Doctor.
3313089
Dr. X: I am the doctor. He is my-
Raven: Accomplice, not assistant.
Dr. X: ....... Yes, he is my accomplice.
Raven: Most of the time.
3313710
Most of the time, eh? What about the rest of the time?
3318504
Raven: Do you want me to get Slendy to kill you off early? No? Then, hush up, and get to work. Now.
3270292
3318776
:See what she's done to our colleagues.
3319297
3319468 Already did that.
3319862
(OoC: Not with me, actually)
3321320 Except they're concerned about a BLU spy.
3321517
(OoC: Facepalms........ You could've pointed it out when I said "This RED Spy has already breached our defences". Redo)
Ow, my brain again.
Are there clones, or they just happen to have similar hairstyles? and there aren't two Applejacks and Two Macs and Two RD's....