Fuck me. That'll teach me to upload a chapter using GoogleDocs. Shit. Sorry the formatting is so terrible. I will fix that when I wake up tomorrow. I'm so sorry! ScatMan
Well my insomnia is withdrawing and it's only 2:48! Oh I have an fimfiction update....I hate you *Edit: Very nice chapter, after all the other chapters and the intro to this one I was fearing this fic would run itself in circles. This was just the thing to re-energize the story and I can't wait to see what happens next. Like will the elements fight in the war too? I mean they do everything else for Equestria, but a war might be a little drastic. And another thing why does he think that Celestia dumped him, I mean sure he had a 'feeling' that it was over, but I mean there is really nothing to suggest they actually broke up.
Ok, that's some major drama, can't wait to see what will come of this.
Celestia being overprotective of her lover is a very nice touch, however i don't know if i can consider her behavior to be in character or not, but i do know that i REALLY like it.
I do believe its hear. Now on the chapter: great as usual, i really hope Celestia understands his point of view and doesnt break up with him but I also see her point that she doesnt want to lose him so I hope for the best. Also if you find yourself in the need of a proofreader(of low quality) im always here
Ooh now I can't wait for the next update good show moving from long mental journeys and everyday musings to a scene of actual danger. By the by when can we expect an update?
but on a serious note :D i think you missed 2 words and missed a letter on 1, other than that it was fine and intense and honestly it's left me feeling worried for the characters
Why did you have to go and strike me in the feels? I can relate to Celestia mainly because I've never really been in a relationship. I shall wait for the next installment.
Great chapter. That fight between them two will definitely liven things up a bit as well as a war brewing up in Equestria. I wonder when he will ask her about the nightmares as she seems to dodge the question too much like she doesn't want him to get close. This a great story. There were a couple of errors here and there but they were hardly noticeable. Keep up the good work!
Now hold on, I know how the next part of the story is gonna play out.
He's gonna go into battle and then it's all gonna go downhill and he's gonna be seriously hurt and just as him or his squad face their deaths, Celestia is gonna go ballistic and disable every bad guy and she's gonna find his body and take him to the hospital and reaffirm their love and possible propose.
Je I like the reference of 50 shades of gray, and was very touchy the fight, I suppose Celestia as new in relationship doesn't know how to deal with the separation, I really hope you two solve things up.
Just a question. When this is all over (I hoped I don't end with a horrible scar or a lost limp) you have a place to stay now that Celestia just kick you out of the castle, right?
Men the first fight…it is always the toughest of all, is always the test of fire…to see if a relationship can truly can sustain…that is the true Test for Celestia…You now that you love her and always will…the question is…did she love you enough to let you go?
For the sake of progression it's good to see all this crap happening but.. I was really enjoying the slice of life stuff. I guess now it's all gonna be war, sads, death, and feels. You should totally do a little day to day life of the human and Celestia side series. Wink wink..
Holy cow, pal. This is what I've been waiting for in this fic: some hard drama. And boy did you deliver! I will say, even though it was hinted at earlier (which you explained), this invasion did feel a smidge fast. It didn't bug me, hell, it made me love the chapter even more with it being the cliffhanger for this chapter. So many emotions ran through me here, which is always fantastic. During some of the key intense moments, I found myself jotting my head up in confusion and light frustration along with the character (or "me" I suppose), which doesn't happen often for me and second person fics, so BIG kudos there, man.
I really didn't want this one to end so soon, especially given how damn good it became towards the middle. I dreaded seeing my page scroll bar nearing the bottom of the window!
Can't wait to see how this all turns out! Funnily enough, the ending of this chapter is slowly reminding me of a previous idea I had for a fic, let's just say, it didn't turn out well for the main character. Hopefully, yours follows suit. (I do love me a good tragedy)
Eh, Luna can just invade their dreams all Magyeko Sharingan-like and give them horrible nightmares until they don't know what real;ity is anymore. And Cadence can mind-control them to love manticores and hydras. And Twilight can go all crazy on them with the Want It, Need It spell and make them obsess over a rock until they all kill themselves, or turn them into oranges and squeeze their juice/blood out.
(Moral: Almost any magic can be used as a weapon when you think creatively.)
I got punched right in my feels during the "breakup" scene. I really hope that the relationship isn't over. That would make me really sad. You actually made me feel like I was there in the room arguing with Celestia.
Wow, there first real fight and they leave each other on that note. And he's the only one of his kind, He's going to stick out like a sore thumb on the battle field. Wonder if they'll try to kidnap him.
Hmmmmm... well to some degree I liked it. Personally... I felt like the dialogue during the "break up" was rather rough, however the emotion still conveyed and over all it was good.
Also, I'm glad that Celestia's overprotectiveness side has come out here... and now I'm looking forward to seeing how it unfolds. I figure that a large part of it comes from some of her past that she's been keeping from "me" and I look forward to seeing what you do next... and I look forward to seeing where you go with this war.
I can definitely relate to this guy here. If Shelby just dismissed me with her back turned, I don't know what I'd do. I'd probably run to the bathroom, throw up, and start crying... Like I did when she walked away from me a couple weeks ago. But I still love her. And she loves me, too. Therefore, I doubt Celestia will stay angry with him.
So will there be blood? Battle? Glory and death? Will my banners fly high in the sky on the corpse of my enemy? Will I fight for my love and my country? WILL I DIE WELL?
legit question: will you be putting combat scenes in this? Or skip over the war to its aftereffects?
Mr. 117, thank you for the comment. I love comments. To answer your question, "Yes." I do plan on including various action scenarios that will involve shooting (with crossbows, of course), stabbing, slashing, and bleeding. And even more than that, if you can believe it. There will be blood. I will put a warning up before the action scenes though, in case you or your fellow readers are not fans of gore. So there will be blood, but hopefully I won't overdo it. There will be gore AND the aftereffects! Double the fun! Thanks for reading! ScatMan
Mr. 117, unfortunately, no promises can be made. Every time I promise something I somehow fuck it up. I know how patient everyone has been, and I am grateful. Another chapter will be out soon. I just don't know exactly when.
You know, I have to say it's about damn time you brought the mortality issue up again. I also think it's funny that everyone thinks they broke up. Please, it was just a simple lovers quarrel. Nothing less nothing more. Anyways, good work as usual Scatman, I was very pleased with this chapter and you're still doing very good work. I especially like how you make the character ramble around with his thoughts; which, in reality is exactly what us humans do and I feel a lot of 2nd person fic righters are afraid to do streams of conciousness because it can seem like filler. Except when you do it. Then it's good. As usual. Anyways, love the fic (and you) so keep up the good work.
Fuck me.
That'll teach me to upload a chapter using GoogleDocs.
Shit.
Sorry the formatting is so terrible. I will fix that when I wake up tomorrow. I'm so sorry!
ScatMan
Well my insomnia is withdrawing and it's only 2:48! Oh I have an fimfiction update....I hate you
*Edit: Very nice chapter, after all the other chapters and the intro to this one I was fearing this fic would run itself in circles. This was just the thing to re-energize the story and I can't wait to see what happens next. Like will the elements fight in the war too? I mean they do everything else for Equestria, but a war might be a little drastic. And another thing why does he think that Celestia dumped him, I mean sure he had a 'feeling' that it was over, but I mean there is really nothing to suggest they actually broke up.
Great chapter as usual.
This chapter twisted all of my emotions together. Having said that, it was really good and can't wait for the next.
Commence nail biting.
Ok, that's some major drama, can't wait to see what will come of this.
Celestia being overprotective of her lover is a very nice touch, however i don't know if i can consider her behavior to be in character or not, but i do know that i REALLY like it.
well that escalated quickly
That. Was. Intense
I do believe its hear. Now on the chapter: great as usual, i really hope Celestia understands his point of view and doesnt break up with him but I also see her point that she doesnt want to lose him so I hope for the best.
Also if you find yourself in the need of a proofreader(of low quality) im always here
Ooh now I can't wait for the next update good show moving from long mental journeys and everyday musings to a scene of actual danger. By the by when can we expect an update?
Love it!
2165562 maybe later
but on a serious note :D i think you missed 2 words and missed a letter on 1, other than that it was fine and intense and honestly it's left me feeling worried for the characters
SHIT JUST GOT REAL!
Oh no!
Great chapter!
Why did you have to go and strike me in the feels? I can relate to Celestia mainly because I've never really been in a relationship. I shall wait for the next installment.
Great chapter. That fight between them two will definitely liven things up a bit as well as a war brewing up in Equestria. I wonder when he will ask her about the nightmares as she seems to dodge the question too much like she doesn't want him to get close. This a great story. There were a couple of errors here and there but they were hardly noticeable. Keep up the good work!
Now hold on, I know how the next part of the story is gonna play out.
He's gonna go into battle and then it's all gonna go downhill and he's gonna be seriously hurt and just as him or his squad face their deaths, Celestia is gonna go ballistic and disable every bad guy and she's gonna find his body and take him to the hospital and reaffirm their love and possible propose.
Why not both?
Je I like the reference of 50 shades of gray, and was very touchy the fight, I suppose Celestia as new in relationship doesn't know how to deal with the separation, I really hope you two solve things up.
Just a question. When this is all over (I hoped I don't end with a horrible scar or a lost limp) you have a place to stay now that Celestia just kick you out of the castle, right?
Men the first fight…it is always the toughest of all, is always the test of fire…to see if a relationship can truly can sustain…that is the true Test for Celestia…You now that you love her and always will…the question is…did she love you enough to let you go?
Men I can't wait until to tomorrow to find out
For the sake of progression it's good to see all this crap happening but.. I was really enjoying the slice of life stuff. I guess now it's all gonna be war, sads, death, and feels. You should totally do a little day to day life of the human and Celestia side series. Wink wink..
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/503/723/7d1.gif
HiE, eh. Don't know, I usually try to avoid those expect for Through the Eyes of Another Pony. I'll give this try though
That was the most intense chapter so far.
Oh... Why must they argue... Screw the invaders!
Holy cow, pal. This is what I've been waiting for in this fic: some hard drama. And boy did you deliver! I will say, even though it was hinted at earlier (which you explained), this invasion did feel a smidge fast. It didn't bug me, hell, it made me love the chapter even more with it being the cliffhanger for this chapter. So many emotions ran through me here, which is always fantastic. During some of the key intense moments, I found myself jotting my head up in confusion and light frustration along with the character (or "me" I suppose), which doesn't happen often for me and second person fics, so BIG kudos there, man.
I really didn't want this one to end so soon, especially given how damn good it became towards the middle. I dreaded seeing my page scroll bar nearing the bottom of the window!
Can't wait to see how this all turns out! Funnily enough, the ending of this chapter is slowly reminding me of a previous idea I had for a fic, let's just say, it didn't turn out well for the main character. Hopefully, yours follows suit. (I do love me a good tragedy)
This is the first fanfic I've ever read and I can't stop reading . This is truly amazing.
Moar pleaze. /)
you know this fic made me start to like celestia and then you do this. the feels man they hurt
Why has there been no flying avocados?
When I checked my favs box for any chapter updates, I saw this and was overjoyed it was 15K words this certainly has made my day<3
Eh, Luna can just invade their dreams all Magyeko Sharingan-like and give them horrible nightmares until they don't know what real;ity is anymore. And Cadence can mind-control them to love manticores and hydras. And Twilight can go all crazy on them with the Want It, Need It spell and make them obsess over a rock until they all kill themselves, or turn them into oranges and squeeze their juice/blood out.
(Moral: Almost any magic can be used as a weapon when you think creatively.)
I actually wish I could give you something for this
I got punched right in my feels during the "breakup" scene.
I really hope that the relationship isn't over. That would make me really sad.
You actually made me feel like I was there in the room arguing with Celestia.
Man I feel really hate myself arguing with Celestia.
Wrap me in a bolt of lightning,
Send me on my way still smiling.
Maybe that's the way I should go,
Straight into the mouth of the unknown...
This is somewhat relevant
Great chapter! I really like this story thus far!
I was a little confused in the start of the story, as it kind of started in the middle of it all.
I'll look forward to future chapters! Liked, faved and followed.
War is coming...
925rebellion.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/03.jpg
In all it's glory...
And all it's horror...
Wow, there first real fight and they leave each other on that note. And he's the only one of his kind, He's going to stick out like a sore thumb on the battle field. Wonder if they'll try to kidnap him.
Hmmmmm... well to some degree I liked it. Personally... I felt like the dialogue during the "break up" was rather rough, however the emotion still conveyed and over all it was good.
Also, I'm glad that Celestia's overprotectiveness side has come out here... and now I'm looking forward to seeing how it unfolds. I figure that a large part of it comes from some of her past that she's been keeping from "me" and I look forward to seeing what you do next... and I look forward to seeing where you go with this war.
you better not make this sad
just please dont make this sad fc07.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2011/355/1/f/sad_celestia_by_qingfey-d4js3y0.png
Oh. Fuck.
I can definitely relate to this guy here. If Shelby just dismissed me with her back turned, I don't know what I'd do. I'd probably run to the bathroom, throw up, and start crying... Like I did when she walked away from me a couple weeks ago.
But I still love her. And she loves me, too. Therefore, I doubt Celestia will stay angry with him.
Rock on, ScatMan!! This story is awesome!!
Man, this is awesome. Waiting for moar.
So will there be blood? Battle? Glory and death? Will my banners fly high in the sky on the corpse of my enemy? Will I fight for my love and my country? WILL I DIE WELL?
legit question: will you be putting combat scenes in this? Or skip over the war to its aftereffects?
2402673
Mr. 117,
thank you for the comment. I love comments.
To answer your question, "Yes."
I do plan on including various action scenarios that will involve shooting (with crossbows, of course), stabbing, slashing, and bleeding. And even more than that, if you can believe it.
There will be blood.
I will put a warning up before the action scenes though, in case you or your fellow readers are not fans of gore.
So there will be blood, but hopefully I won't overdo it.
There will be gore AND the aftereffects! Double the fun!
Thanks for reading!
ScatMan
2408386 I can't wait for it then! I have enjoyed this story a lot, and can't wait for the next chapter. Any update on when that might be?.....
2410779
Mr. 117,
unfortunately, no promises can be made. Every time I promise something I somehow fuck it up.
I know how patient everyone has been, and I am grateful. Another chapter will be out soon. I just don't know exactly when.
2411891 Good to hear! I dont mean to rush, just take your time. I know it will be good.
You know, I have to say it's about damn time you brought the mortality issue up again. I also think it's funny that everyone thinks they broke up. Please, it was just a simple lovers quarrel. Nothing less nothing more.
Anyways, good work as usual Scatman, I was very pleased with this chapter and you're still doing very good work. I especially like how you make the character ramble around with his thoughts; which, in reality is exactly what us humans do and I feel a lot of 2nd person fic righters are afraid to do streams of conciousness because it can seem like filler. Except when you do it. Then it's good. As usual.
Anyways, love the fic (and you) so keep up the good work.
~Tidbit
i will await an update if it takes me years god dammit<3
best story ever