Twilight Abuses the Cutie Map

by Cxcd

Twilight's Type - (02) Rejected!

This was it.

Twilight would never describe herself as a cocky person. Hay, she wouldn’t even go as far as describing herself as confident. Because today was different. Today was a new day, a new Twilight. Right now, as she approached the Sweet Apple Acres barn, she felt like she was on cloud-layer-nine.

She had a spring in her step. She had a bounce to her hips. She was ready. Which, all things social-interaction, was surprising. She even surprised herself. She usually was never ready nor willing to talk to a pony, unless said pony was a friend. And even then! Sometimes, she just needed a moment to herself.

Twilight watched as Applejack deposited a basket of apples onto the floor. A familiar twinge of doubt wiggled it’s way into Twilight’s mind, but she forced it down and out of the way. This was her day, and she was going to capture it to it’s fullest potential.

She and Applejack talked for a few minutes. Although she still felt a little tingly in her hooves, asking where Big-Mac was came naturally. Applejack even shot her a bit of a look. Thankfully, it seemed Twilight's impeccable improv skills seemed to pay off, as Applejack shrugged it off as she grabbed a new basket from the barn.

It was two tree rows down and to the left. Eventually, she peered her head around a tree.

There he was.

He looked majestic. Jeesh, had Twilight ever noticed Big-Mac before? He was even better than in her dreams. Twilight suddenly felt very put off, like some pony pulled the ‘confidence’ plug from her consciousness. She felt like he was a ten while she was a one.It occurred to Twilight how she might just be chasing some pony outside of her range. What really were the chances that Big-Mac would reject her? Oh, if only she stayed behind to do some reading in the library!

It was intimidating. His coat radiated a warmth that was unrepeatable. His red coat, his blonde mane, his actually GREEN eyes instead of that nasty violet he had in her dreams! The apple trees danced above him, creating a fluctuating shadow that danced beautifully across his back.

Twilight pulled her head back, leaning against the tree, somehow panting suddenly.

No. She couldn’t do it. She would return to Spike with her head held low, damn it! Low and proud! No pony would ever have to know she had this voyage into romance. It was stupid, anyways! Just a dumb fantasy. She hadn’t even stopped to think about it. She got a special some pony… then what? Show off Big-Mac to the world, or something? Relationships were hard! No pony had to know this was happening. She could- dunno- swear Spike to secrecy with a blood-binding oath contact or something.

“Miss Twilight?”

“AAH!”Twilight screamed, suddenly finding herself on the orchard floor. She spun around, laying on her side, staring up at the hunking stallion before her. Her mouth dropped as she witnessed Big-Mac leaning over her, a concerned glint in his eyes.

“Are ya’ll alright?” He asked in his deep voice. Twilight tried to fight down the blush- and lost.

“F-Fine..?” She said in a squeaky voice. Big-Mac held out his hoof, to which Twilight gladly accepted, pulling herself up. “J-Just a little startled. Hehe?” She tried to laugh. Big-Mac took a step back to give a healthy distance, raising his eyebrow.

“Good.” He nodded. Twilight scratched her fetlock, looking around at the orchard. Well- now she was here. Might as well go through with it, right?

“So- uhm.” She cleared her throat, looking down at Big-Mac’s chest. “H-Heyyy! I- I know you’re- um- a farmer, or-”

“Miss Twilight, my eyes are up here.” He said as politely as possible. Twilight slowly scrawled her eyes up, meeting the stallions. It was like they suddenly were intimidating! She began sweating, forcing herself to keep staring.

“R-Right. Sorry. What I was- um- saying, was- um-” She cleared her throat again, this time more violently. “I know- um- you’re an Earth-pony and I’m a Unicorn- or- wait, I don’t- sorry, that shouldn’t matter- um-” She darted her eyes towards the ground, almost beginning to count the blades of grass. Her scratching fetlock almost started to wear away the fur. Then, in the quietest audible voice she could muster, she popped the question. “Will you go on a date with me?”

…

“Enope.”

And just like that, the world ended. Equestria was unmade in a single moment. Equus split in half like a piece of timber. And everything, yes, everything seemed to focus around Twilight Sparkle. She stared blankly, suddenly finding herself fallen to her flank. Big-Mac’s lips kept moving, but she didn’t hear anything.

She was… rejected. Rejected hard with just a simple no. She went in knowing that she might’ve been rejected. It was simple math. A 66.5% chance of being told no. But- she didn’t know why it still stung so hard. It was just so… so… painful.

She was going to die alone. Die alone with no pony around her for comfort. No big stallion. No kids. No grand-kids. Was that even a factor going in? Apparently not, as these things suddenly started filling her mind now of all times.

“Twilight, you alright?” He asked, breaking Twilight out of her trance. Twilight looked up at Big-Mac. Then stood up, and walked away. It hurt too much. “Twilight!” He shouted. Twilight kept walking. It didn’t matter. She wasn’t going to go home with her head held low anymore. She was going to go home with her head held low in shame.

She was right, though. She didn’t do enough research. Maybe she should’ve asked Rarity for romance novels for her to study up on. What went wrong? Perhaps it was the asking in the first place. Maybe she just didn’t know Big-Mac well enough to ask something like that. Perhaps it was her mane. She showered yesterday!

Nothing she tried to rectify in her brain mattered because, in the end of the day, it was her who was wrong. She wasn’t right. Something Big-Mac saw in her wasn’t right, and she was rejected.

In her stupor, she didn’t even realize she had accidentally went further into the forest instead of out of it. Out of sight safely, Twilight collapsed against a nearby tree. Now what? Does the protagonist cry out of sadness of being rejected? She didn’t feel like crying. But she felt as is she should be crying. Dammit, she should’ve read romance novels!

Twilight instead just decided to lay in her own sorrow, resting her head on the ground.

It was a nice day outside. Really, it was.

Too bad the rest of the day was going to be ruined now.

…

That was until she heard an unnatural flapping sound.

A swooping shadow suddenly crossed the ground above her! She instinctively tried to get even lower to the ground than she already was. She suddenly got a strange feeling she was going to be eaten by a fruit-bat!

A sound like paper being flipped through the wind exploded across the sky. The figure smashed into the ground like a bat out of hell, kicking up dirt and making an extremely loud thump sound. Twilight yelped, covering her ears with her hooves. It hurt.

There was a few moments of tense silence. Then, a voice she wasn’t expecting to hear muffled through her ears.

“Twi?” It asked. Twilight let out an estranged sigh of relief, standing up to meet the slightly taller Pegasus.

“Rainbow Dash!” She yelled, getting into her face. “You scared me half to death!” She stomped, eyeing her up.

“Sorry!” She put a hoof up in self-defense, pushing Twilight back a step. “I wanted to make sure you’re okay. I saw what happened. I was napping a few trees down, and- woah.” Rainbow finally took in the mare standing in front of her. “Are you okay, Twi?” She asked concernedly.

“Fine.” She mumbled. “Just got a little scared, that’s all.”

As a matter of fact, ‘fine’ was the last thing she was. Her mane seemed to suddenly start to spring out at every angle, leaving the once-familiar rat’s nest returning to her mane. The hairs on the back of her neck was standing up, and Twilight seemed to be breathing a little bit faster and louder than normal, her hooves shaking slightly where she stood.

“A little scared?” Rainbow asked. “Twilight, are you sick or something?” She asked, her eyes coated in concern. “If you need me to go get help, I-”

“I. Am. Fine.” She growled. “Loud noise. Loud noise scared me.” She sighed. “I just got rejected by a stallion, Dash. I just need some alone time.”

“Yeah, I saw.” Rainbow said, still eyeing Twilight. “You gave him the hard cold-shoulder pretty badly. Looked like he was about to cry, too.”

“What?” Twilight asked, surprisingly. She could feel her breathing finally start to slow down as she sat back onto the grass. “He was?”

“Yeah.” Rainbow nodded. “Did you… not hear him?” She cocked her head. Twilight solemnly shook her head. “Yeah, he said something about- err- not seeing you as anything more than a friend, and- um- he didn’t want to be that creepy stallion that hit on his sister’s friends.” Rainbow shrugged. Then, she noticed Twilight again. “Are you okay-”

“Damn it!” She shouted, standing up and marching in a tight circle. The sudden outburst made Rainbow take a few steps back in shock. “All I do is ruin things! Why couldn’t I’ve just been born… normal? Why did Celestia damn me to this! All I do is- screw up ponies feelings!” Twilight almost began hyperventilating, turning around and marching back towards the crime scene. “I have to go back and- I dunno- apologize!”

“Woah, woah. Twi.” Rainbow flew in front of her, stopping Twilight in her tracks. Twilight tried to go around, but Rainbow only side-stepped her. “Calm down. What’s going on? I’ve never seen you this- frazzled before. And I’ve seen you pretty frazzled.”

“I gotta go see him!” She almost yelled, sidestepping again, which was almost effortlessly blocked by Rainbow.

“You’re freaking out, and as a friend, I’m concerned.” Rainbow finally put a hoof on Twilight’s chest stopping her sidestepping. “Tell me what’s wrong. Please.”

“I- Umph- fine.” Twilight sighed, lowering her head and sitting again. She started itching her fetlock as she recounted the past week. “I’ve been having… dreams. It started normally, but it kept reoccurring! I keep going on dates with stallions, and- I don’t know what I was thinking! I guess I let it get to me, and Spike suggested I actually try. Just got rejected pretty hard, I guess. Dunno, I wasn’t expecting it.”

“You… You, the Twilight Sparkle, want to go on a date?” Rainbow asked, completely baffled. “The protege to the Princess? The bookworm? You?”

“Yes.” Twilight sighed. “You cannot tell any of our friends. Ever.” She suddenly became stern, her expression solidifying. “You’re in this too, now. You, me, and Spike.”

“You’re trying to get laid?” Rainbow asked, a smile cracking over her face.

“Not… laid perse…” Twilight itched her fetlock harder. “I’m just- I guess I want to settle down. Have some strong pony hold me in their hooves as I fall aslee-” Twilight stopped talking, looking at Rainbow Dash, who’s jaw was currently hitting the floor. Twilight’s cheeks flushed as she realized she spoke too much. It was a moment of super-awkward and tense silence. Super-duper embarrassing, and most of all, it was-

“Bwahahahaha!”

Hilarious?

“Are you kidding me, Twi?” Rainbow shouted on the floor, rubbing her wings into the grass. Twilight wore an offended expression as Rainbow failed to resist. “You have fantasies?”

“N-Not fantasies-”

“The bookworm? Twilight, no offense, but you are hopeless! There’s no chance this is going to work!” Twilight’s face grimaced, standing up to start marching away.

“Gee, thank. I always knew I could count on-”

“Not without me.” Rainbow said, standing up faster than a lightning bolt. Twilight let out a small shriek as Rainbow started hovering a few inches off the ground, awesomeness radiating off of her in waves. Twilight could only stare as a non-existent crowd began cheering for her. “I will be your trainer! I will be your middle-mare! I will hook you up with the best stallion I can find!”

“What.”

“Me, the eighteen year old, single, virgin mare, will try my hardest! I will not eat! I will not sleep! Well- maybe a quick nap and a snack if I can’t find one in the next few hours… After that, nothing will stop me get Twilight Sparkle laid!” She practically screamed. Twilight winced at the volume, not quite being loud enough to start making her shiver again. Rainbow began moon-walking in the air, making weird DJ sounds with her mouth as the invisible crowd only grew louder. There was absolutely a song playing in her head.

“What the hay is going on back here?” A sudden new voice said. Twilight jumped slightly, turning around to see Applejack setting down a basket on the ground. Rainbow screeched to a halt, her wings involuntarily snapping shut.

“Nothing!” Twilight said with a huge, fake smile. Applejack studied her for a moment, then applying a cheeky smile that almost drained Twilight’s soul.

“Nothin’, huh? ‘nothin will stop me get Twilight Sparkle laid’ is nothin’, huh?” She rolled her eyes. “Man, did I pick the wrong time to walk in or summit?”

“Twilight!” Rainbow regained her senses, flying again. “Quick, teleport to the planning room! I’ll distract her!” Rainbow flew faster than a speeding bullet, grabbing Applejack’s stetson and pulling it over her eyes. Twilight stood in shock for a second, watching as Applejack wrestled with the hat and Rainbow disappear into the horizon.

Twilight charged her horn and teleported to the only place she could assume where the ‘planning room’ was. The library.

Applejack just got the stetson off her eyes at Twilight appeared to blink out of reality.

“Gosh darn it.” She sighed. “What a bunch of- wait.” Applejack shook her head. “’getting laid?’ She asked me about Big-Mac- Oh Celestia!” Applejack shook her head. “Twilight, ya’ll better not be hitting on my brother!” She yelled to the skies.

Comments

[Mystic Sunrise]

“Gosh darn it.” She sighed. “What a bunch of- wait.” Applejack shook her head. “’ getting laid?’ She asked me about Big-Mac- Oh Celestia!” Applejack shook her head. “Twilight, ya’ll better not be hitting on my brother!” She yelled to the skies.

Or you'll what?
...
: Thought so.