• Published 23rd Dec 2021
  • 7,449 Views, 400 Comments

Chaotic Visage - Orderly Disassembly



sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurrrrt meeee... A comforting lie. Isn't it?

  • ...
27
 400
 7,449

Ch 21 - Destination, Starfall

I felt warm.

Not the shallow heat of fire, nor the ethereal feeling of rage, but rather, a soul-deep warmth that reached my very core.

It was like my mind was submerged in molasses.

I watched as building after building passed me by in a blur as my body moved forward almost of its own accord.

Some were tall, some were squat, some were colorful, some were dull. At some point, they all began blurring together, forming a continuous mosaic of pony architecture.

The drone and chatter of the crowd almost drowned out the buzzing in my skull but failed to block Clover’s words.

“Typh—Plane Shift, how did you manage to get an audience with the Princess so quickly? We only just got here!”

Her worried voice made me feel joyful, ecstatic even, but why?

Eh, it doesn’t matter.

I managed to keep my words from slurring.

“I have my ways.”

Why must I be crisp and clear when all of these buildings could get away with just being big smudges?

Seems a bit unfair if you ask me.

Clover spoke up again.

“Are you alright? You seem… not entirely here.”

I snorted at that.

I was all the way here thank you very much! If I wasn’t, then you wouldn’t be talking to me, or maybe you would. I don’t judge.

I finally answered in a hushed tone, pitching it to barely reach Clover’s ears despite the crowd.

“I’m fine, stop asking.”

She frowned at me but let the subject drop.

Signs swung overhead as we continued, advertising silly names like The Golden Gala Gallery or Rosemary Rarities.

The frivolous gilded planks almost drew my attention away from the eyes.

Crowds didn’t form or disperse, waves of eyes didn’t turn on me all at once, but a passing earthpony would glare at me with thinly veiled hate, a pegasus would ruffle their wings as they brush past me, or a unicorn would look down their snout at me.

As if absolutely everyone thought that the entire world centered on them and that those around them should be grateful to be allowed anywhere near this world’s true protagonist.

It was sickening.

I am going to enjoy watching them run and scream.

How dare they treat each other like this, how dare they act like this at all?

It’s like I’m surrounded by overgrown children!

My smile faltered at the thought.

No, that would be insulting the children I knew.

Sunshine Smiles may have turned me away, but they did not hate, just feared. Right?

Why do I remember so much red when I think back? I didn’t hurt anyone there did–

My thoughts were cut off by a series of squawks coming from a nearby alley and I froze.

A knife, a flash, so much ugly red.

My head snapped to the noise and I spotted a trio of ponies ganging up on a smaller griffin. The poor catbird looked like a teenager judging by his size, definitely not enough to threaten the three adult ponies.

I glanced around, trying to see if anyone else noticed.

Not one stopped, they all seemed too engrossed with whatever was directly in front of them.

Out of sight, out of mind, right?

With a small twist of magic, the noise stopped, leaving a confused griffon devoid of the knowledge of his situation.

Just another few hunks of trash tossed out of this world.

“You alright Typhon? You’re looking distant again.”

I shook out of my stupor, zoned in, and continued walking.

“Yes, Clover, I’m fine.”

She gave me another sidelong glance but didn’t push the matter.

A sad truth struck me.

I had to let go of the warmth, it was too dangerous to rely on at the moment.

I couldn’t afford to give in to my impulses, not when I was so damned close.

With a sigh, I forced the warmth out with a wave of icy hate.

Hate for the filth that surrounded me, hate for the injustice that I had dealt with, and that so many others definitely suffered.

Those others couldn’t fight back, they simply lacked the strength.

I am different.

With a deep breath, my focus sharpened even further, making the colors of the world brighten and the edges sharpen.

A dull mind only sees dull edges and dull colors, blocking out the colder truths that surround it.

But in turn, it dulls logic as a price.

It was comfortable, blissful even, but a little bit of realism is worth suffering for my plan.

I was just too close to do otherwise.

My smile flattened as I kept my eyes ahead, trying to blend in with the crowd.

I checked on my connection to the false stars in the sky. It was stable.

Good, I can’t let them drop, not yet anyhow.

The shorter squatter buildings that surrounded us quickly gave way to multistoried wooden affairs, which themselves melted into towering marble behemoths.

By the time we’d reached the palace, nigh solid walls of white stone filled our vision.

Ponies absolutely filled the wide paved street, but no pegasi flew overhead.

A law against it, perhaps?

It wouldn’t surprise me if “Unicornia” would favor policies that put down the “feather heads” and “mud ponies” as I’ve heard the snobs call them.

Eventually, we came to a white gate, guarded by a pair of tall guardsponies clad in glittering golden armor.

Toy soldiers if I’d ever seen any. Even the enchantments I felt on them boiled down to making them all look the same.

Their spears were held ramrod straight, as if they served to protect those around them, as if they commanded true respect.

Clover and I passed them by without issue alongside a dozen other ponies.

A few waves of magic passed over me as I entered.

No doubt a few alarm spells or security scans to dismiss illusions and the like.

Good thing I twist reality instead of casting spells. Otherwise, their preparations might’ve actually mattered.

I could hear the hesitation in Clover’s hoof steps. The little jitter at the end of the clop gave it away.

I committed the red carpet, the elegant drapes, and the beautiful pillars to memory. I absorbed the fanciful patterns woven into fabrics and the elaborate mosaics carved into the stone walls.

Those carvings depicted dozens of different conflicts, ranging from pony infighting to battles against grand tyrants and monsters beyond horrible.

So much history drenched this brightly lit hall.

I wonder if they have backup histories.

Probably.

I hope they do anyway, for their sake.

The group of ponies we were in trotted through the winding passages that twisted and turned at seemingly random intervals.

Were we not escorted by a pair of unicorn guards, we would’ve doubtless been hopelessly lost in this maze of marble and velvet.

So much effort to keep the undesirables out.

Yet, they let me right in.

How wasteful.

We came to a stop before a pair of massive golden doors, engraved with the likeness of the two Princesses standing beneath their respective celestial bodies.

Though, I noticed a few nicks on Celestia’s face and…a broken ward?

Curious.

I shook my head before stepping forward.

“I do believe that I am first in the queue, good sirs.”

The guards stood aside and a mare with an inkwell cutiemark strolled out from an unseen door.

She looked at me and asked in a tired voice

“Are you Plane Shift of the Stargate tower?”

I nodded, and she responded by tapping the big doors.

They glided open soundlessly.

What kind of oil do they use on those monsters for them to be so—magic, stop being stupid, Typhon.

I smiled as I trotted forward with Clover in tow.

“I’m sorry ma’am but you’re not—“

Clover cut her off with a quick flash of the glowing medallion.

The secretary shut her mouth and about-faced with a worried expression.

Just how much pull did that hunk of metal have?

Bah, it doesn’t matter.

The carpet I walked on went all the way up to a small red circle right in front of the throne. Thick stone pillars dotted the sides, breaking up my vision of the room.

As I went, I spotted glass panes on the walls, depicting what appeared to be victories over great evils.

A large-looking ram, a red centaur faced by a gargoyle, and a dark-looking unicorn tyrant, all captured in colored glass in their moment of defeat.

I took it all in, letting the sights burn themselves into my very soul.

After all, I won’t be getting another chance to do so.

My calm stroll down this mini hall of history ended before the throne. I was probably too close given the glares from the guards and Celestia’s frown.

I felt cold, not the chill of water, nor the bite of brisk air. No, I felt the icy inferno of hate fogging my mind with its poison.

I heard Clover come to a stop a ways back.

Celestia cocked an eyebrow, waiting for my question.

I sighed, letting tension slide off of me.

I’ve waited enough for this, no need for games.

“I’ve come a long way, Celestia, a very long way to give you a chance.”

The guards stiffened and Celestia’s face scrunched in confusion.

“A chance for what, Subject? We have not spoken, have we?”

I smiled, letting the false form melt away like wax, and stood to my full, monstrous height.

She recoiled, and I saw new lines etch themselves into her eyes.

Good.

The guards charged me, but a quick snap had them elsewhere.

They were unharmed of course, I couldn’t blame them for doing their job.

That shook Celestia from her shock, and she had the gall to scowl at me.

“What did you do with my guards?”

I waved a paw, feeling several joints pop in the process.

“Oh, I just sent them somewhere safe. I’m not so ignorant as to be unable to see things from another’s perspective. It’s not like I’m an animal or anything, right?”

My smile hurt, hurt in ways I didn’t know were possible. The ache creeped its way to my core like a tangle of poisonous vines and just kept reaching deeper.

Celestia flinched at that.

“I—yes, no.”

She took a breath before continuing in a more calm tone.

“I apologize for what occurred at the time, and am truly sorry that–”

As if she felt remorse.

Please, like I’m that gullible anymore.

“Cut the crap, we both know that’s a lie.”

My smile fell into a sneer.

I wanted to say more, wanted to rant, wanted to make her understand.

Instead, I felt rage glue my mouth shut, and my fists clench.

Why, why did they not see?

How can they not know?

What is it that they want from me?!

I just wanted a home and all I got was this!

The edges of my vision trembled. My face was wet.

Why? It's not raining.

“T-Typhon, you said you’d give her a chance. She’s trying to apologize. Can’t you just let her?”

I turned to Clover.

Her legs were sturdy and her head was steady, but I could see the sparkle of fear in the corners of her eyes, could hear her heart seemingly vibrate in her chest.

In the storm of my mind, an icy spear rose and stabbed outwards in the form of calm words. A mere jab at her walls of justifications, meant to maneuver her guard.

“Clover, tell me, what exactly do you think she did?”

She stared for a moment, jaw flapping uselessly before she shook her head, and met my eyes with new courage flickering in place of fear.

“She ordered you imprisoned and failed to act when it looked like you got hurt. But she’s remorseful, can’t you see it?”

No, no I could not.

The only thing she’s sorry for is not making sure that I was dead the first time.

I opened my mouth to mount a verbal assault but Celestia cut me off before I could start.

“I, I know that you care not for apologies, so maybe the true reasons will be better.”

Excuses, all you can offer are useless excuses.

Celestia leveled a steady gaze at me, maintaining eye contact with me.

“Equestria was, is, and will be unstable for a long time. My sister and I have yet to truly consolidate our power, so other factions within our kingdom could still threaten our position. We feared that one group or another might try to manipulate, or even goad you into bouts of wanton destruction.”

Yes, because that makes it so much better.

She gulped before continuing.

“I know that we were wrong, I understand that we shouldn’t have gone through with the plan, but please, understand. We only did this so that our little ponies could live peacefully, without having to worry about an immensely powerful entity that they do not understand.”

Her eyes pleaded, begged even, for mercy. I opened my jaw, ready to dismiss it, but nothing came out.

She harmed me to protect her own, was that not my logic at Sunshine Smiles? That I would bury thousands for the ones I cared for?

Damn this cold hate, damn this reason, damn it, damn it, damn it all, this was meant to be justice, not a trial!

No, we’re not the same. I fought to protect, and she lashed out in fear.

My teeth ground as silence reigned for a moment, and I saw hope twinkle in Celestia’s eyes once more.

“No.”

One word. One simple, whispered word, brought a wave of sorrow across the Princess’ face.

And perhaps, a twinge of fear?

“I, I understand, Typhon, but if you cannot forgive us, then please go, before more of our ponies draw your ire.”

Her head dipped and she closed her eyes.

I snarled at the dismissal.

“Do you honestly think that you’re above consequences? Do you truly believe that–”

My words were cut off by the crash of heavy metal on stone, and a lance of pain the size of a mountain peak that jabbed my brain.

My connection to the false stars shuddered, and I worried that my grip would fail.

The time wasn’t right yet.

But I managed to grasp the fading wisps of the tether before it could die completely.

Barely.

I heard a bout of laughter and spun to see Luna striding through the golden doors.

“I told you, Sister! This beast is relentless.”

She strolled around the cage, ignoring my glare, and came to a stop beside Celestia. The arrogant moron turned to me with a smug grin.

“And now, it is caged, just as you wanted.”

You will regret that.

Celestia grimaced, making to speak, but Luna continued.

“I checked for that pesky clone spell, and scanned for several other possible tricks, but no, the foolish creature really came clad only in illusions! I–”

Because I found a better option.

“ENOUGH!”

Celestia’s voice thundered through the courtroom, starting an annoying ringing in my ears.

The ringing faded in a moment, and Luna turned her manic grin on Celestia.

“Oh, and why is that, dear Sister? Was this not your goal? Have I not accomplished what you failed to do?”

Her grin faded as she surged on with venom dripping from her words.

“Just as I did when Tauros fell?”

Her face bled into an angry sneer, lines tracing themselves across her muzzle.

“Just as I did when the Nightmare came?”

Luna faced me, still addressing her sister.

“How many times must I save you, Sister? How many times must the fate of this country be mine to carry before you finally accept it!”

Celestia held her ground, not even flinching at her sister’s rage, and asked in an even voice

“Accept what, Luna?”

“That I am your equal, that I deserve the same respect you have weaseled from our ponies, that my night has the right to shine as bright as your day!”

Celestia’s shoulders slumped and her eyes softened.

“Luna, I’ve always thought of you as an equal, but we can’t demand respect from our subjects. If we do, we would only ever get false loyalty, and I doubt you want that.”

Luna’s previous passion seemed gone now, evidenced by the ice in her words.

“Section seventeen of the New Crown Bill.”

“I—“

“Section twenty-two of the First Great Reform.”

“But—“

“The Twilight Court Laws.

I had enough.

And my whispered words rang with the weight of worlds.

“Be silent.”

Luna’s head snapped in my direction.

“You will be dealt with later, beast!”

I went to answer, but Luna turned on her sister and blasted Celestia through the wall.

“I will finally get what I deserve, sister! Do you hear me, I—“

The rest of her words were lost to me as she dove out through the hole she made.

I reached out with a trembling hand and gripped the bars of the cage.

Well, at least she tried to listen, at least she made the attempt.

If only her words meant something.

If only they weren’t lies.

If only hypocrisy didn’t rule them.

I hate hypocrites.

I tightened my grip on the bars, and looked back at Clover. She stood stock still, as if she was frozen in place by a powerful spell.

Nothing, she did nothing.

No one does anymore, nobody tries to act, to help others around them.

Why am I the only one trying anymore?

Why am I supposed to be the only one that cares?

At the Tower, I made my mistakes, but I cleaned up my mess as well. On the road, I may have frightened a few, but I wasn’t out for blood. At the town, I saved them, I staved off the rebels like a hunter would a pack of wolves.

And here, here I gave them a chance. I didn’t expect anything, I predicted nearly exactly what would happen, but yet I held onto the faint insane hope that they would learn.

I’m tired of caring, I’m so very tired of all of this.

Why should I be the only one to bear this weight?

Because I can’t see a single damned reason anymore.

So, I let go. I let go of the stress, I let go of the hate, let go of the anger, let go of the expectations, the worries, the stars above.

And smiled, I smiled as relief flooded me, leaving me in a violent bliss.

I felt warm.

30…

A pop sounded out from behind us and a familiar voice rasped.

“I knew it, I knew it, you were alive all along!”

29…

I looked over my shoulder and found Starswirl standing in the doorway, the hall behind him was empty. How peculiar.

I yawned.

“Hey, Starswirl.”

28…

I should be angry at him, I suppose, but I just let go of all my anger, and I don’t really feel up to going back to grab it again.

It’s not like I have enough time to do so anyway.

27…

Starswirl stared at me with bloodshot eyes and stalked forward in a decidedly un-equine manner. It was like he was more of a cat than a pony.

“I have been waiting for you, Enigma. Oh, how I waited, but the wait is over now, and it was worth it!”

26…

His smile widened even further, reaching past the normal limit.

“S-Starswirl, are you alright?”

Clover’s voice was laced with concern. Probably because of Starswirl’s disheveled look.

Or maybe it’s the slight curve to his horn?

Or are the glowing crystal orbs hanging from his saddlebags setting her off?

25…

Eh, it doesn’t really matter in the end, it’s too late already. Too late for all of them.

Clover stepped closer to the wizened mage, but Starswirl flung her back with a flick of his magic.

“Stay away from me you traitor. You led that walking disaster right here without trying to warn anypony!”

24…

“However, we are all fortunate enough that the Princess and I predicted such a possibility.”

Clover groaned as she got up, but managed to force out a question while doing so.

“How d-did you know?”

23…

Starswirl scoffed at Clover’s quivering voice.

“An army disappeared in a region you just so happened to be traveling towards after Celestia gave you that medallion?”

Can’t these two shut up? It’s not like there’s anything important left to say!

22…

“And before you ask, I’m the one who made the bloody thing. Of course I would know its purpose!”

Starswirl stepped closer, brandishing one of the orbs at me, and it crackled with energy.

One moment, the orbs were red and shrouded in mist. The next, it was a cloak of blue lightning, then a sheet of leaves, yellow flowers, orange fire…so many colors.

I feel fuzzy, is that normal? I, I don’t think so?

21…

“Do you see this, Enigma? Do you witness your bane, you overgrown mistake?”

He brought one of the orbs right up to the bars, and strange gridlike lightning began to arc all over the cage.

I could barely make out the strange sphere from the blurred background anymore.

20…

Who were these two again? I-I’m supposed to hate them right?

The younger one yelled at the bearded one.

She seems nice, better than that other guy.

19…

They’re yelling more now.

Why are they yelling? What does “solidified order” have to do with anything?

Can’t we just be friends?

It’s a lot easier than fighting and life is short, especially with those angels on the way.

18…

More yelling, and the young one just smacked the bearded one over the head with one of those sour circles.

17…

It’s quiet now, so very quiet.

16…

I feel faint, what were those things?

15…

14…

Ugly red trickled down the floor

13…

12…

Oh, thank you for kicking the orb away, younger unicorn person. It was quite the bother.

I think I smiled, right? Yeah, I got it right.

11…

10…

The unicorn, she—I think it’s a she—has been saying stuff, a bunch of stuff.

9…

I think she’s saying “sorry” now? I don’t know why though, she wasn’t the one who fogged up my eyes.

8…

Aww, she looks sad. Don’t worry little one, I’ll take you along if you want.

7…

Yep, just gotta let those angels break me out first.

6…

There’s the whistling! They’re getting close!

5…

4…

Oh, stop panicking, I’ll get us out before the music gets too loud.

3…

I wound up what little power I had left, locking onto the place I wanted to go.

2…

Next, I grasped her and myself in my magic. I could only barely touch her though.

I wonder why.

1…

Thunder clapped, stone shattered, and steel groaned.

And my world.

Went.

White.

Author's Note:

we're nearing the end guys, I hope you enjoy this, feel free to leave a comment below. I always love seeing your thoughts.

also, feel free to join my discord if you want to ask me more direct questions
https://discord.gg/kSdwbw5fb4