Chapter 6
“Well,” Cozy began, taking a metered breath, “what are your options?”
“Good question…” Discord hummed, resting on his tail as though it were a chair. “Considering your little ruckus so rudely caught my attention, I’m sorely tempted to turn you over to Twilight.”
She gave him a moment to finish, before quietly speaking up. “But…?”
“But,” he tiredly continued, gradually lowering her to the floor, “I’m a bit torn. Frankly, it’s been a while since I’ve had any interest in visiting, but the commotion of an alicorn, a human, and a centuries old evil pegasus wasn’t something I could easily ignore - especially after what you did to the place…” His gaze swept across the aged yet restored room, before he glowered down at her.
“We weren’t going to stay and we definitely weren’t intending to have a fight here, it’s just…” she fell silent, as the sound of galloping drew her attention towards the door.
Flurry burst into the room, her horn wreathed in golden light. Scowling, she quickly scanned the chamber, spotted the draconequus and pegasus, and knit her brow. Were it not for the tenuous situation, her gobsmacked expression would have been priceless. Her mouth flapped noiselessly, looking between the two, before she found her voice.
“Discord?!” she blurted.
“Flurry,” Cozy sighed, relieved to see the Princess unharmed.
“Cozy?!” Flurry coughed, as if finally realizing that the guards and their lap dogs were suspiciously vacant.
Discord smiled and waved at the alicorn, as cheerful and carefree as Cozy could ever remember seeing the chimeric demigod. “Goodnight!” he guffawed, waggling his fingers at the Princess. Flurry fell to the floor, in the blink of an eye, but not before a pillow appeared beneath her and a sleeping cap materialized on her head. Snoring loudly, Flurry landed with a soft Thud.
“You were saying?” Discord noted, nonchalantly peering down at the pegasus, as if the intrusion hadn’t even happened.
“We didn’t have anywhere else to go. I don’t know why all this is happening, but I know we don’t have many options. They’re after me, they’re after Anon, and apparently they think I brainwashed a Princess. I just needed some time to plan our next move,” Cozy confessed, in a rare admission of uncertainty.
“This is just too rich,” he joylessly laughed, snapping his fingers. Winking himself and the miniscule pony into a pair of chairs, with a hovering chessboard between them, he condescendingly grinned over at her. “The strategist doesn’t have a plan, how poetic.”
“It’s not a lack of a plan, it’s an absence of pieces,” she flatly stated, extending a wing. “King - yourself. Major pieces - information. Minor pieces - your allies. Pawns -”
“The cannon fodder,” Discord commented, coolly inspecting one of the small figures.
His statement, while seemingly harmless, held a sharp edge. He knew she had used and discarded others throughout her schemes, viewing them as disposable, so she’d have to proceed with caution. Inhaling deeply, she closed her eyes and steeled herself.
“Only if they have to be. Everything and everyone has a use, even if it might not appear like it,” she clarified, reaching out and moving a piece atop the board. “Knight to C six.”
“And what if their use is to be sacrificed?” he asked, sliding a pawn forward.
“Only an idiot would hope to sacrifice a pawn. You adapt to the game, think ahead, and weave a web - after all, a pawn is the only one that can become a Queen,” she smugly rebuked. “Pawn to E five.”
“I didn’t say hope, I said use,” he coldly muttered, moving a bishop through the opening he’d created.
“If it’s unavoidable, yes, it can happen,” she sighed, giving him what he wanted. “Pawn to B six.”
“I’m sure the pawns would be thrilled,” Discord murmured, his eyes glued to the board. After hoping one of his knights over to H four, in an illegal and possibly ignorant move, he retracted his hand.
“Speaking from personal experience, it’s not great...” Cozy dispassionately declared, sending her Queen down the board to claim his knight.
Seizing his piece in her wing, she glared over at him. There were a great many things she wanted to say to him, but it was neither the time nor the place to do so. She was at his mercy, in all but one sense - her intellect. Given his nigh omnipotence, her mind was the only weapon in her arsenal which held even the slightest chance of defeating him.
“Considering you outsmarted me and robbed me of my power, I’d say we were even,” he hissed. Snapping his fingers, changing one of his pawns into a rook, he moved the transmuted piece and reaped revenge against Cozy’s Queen.
“Huh,” she chirped, biting back her vitriol, “so imprisoning Chrysalis, Tirek, and myself was part of some plan? Maybe you figured the Elements would release us eventually so we could make amends or even use our abilities for good?” Ignoring him, fixating on the board, she moved her knight to C five.
“If it had been meant to happen, it would have happened. It’s not like my eventual release was part of some grand design,” Discord laughed, capturing her knight.
“Well, I guess you’re lucky Twilight and her friends took pity upon you - twice…” she chided. Moving her pawn, she claimed his fraudulent Queen.
Scrunching his snout, Discord rolled his eyes. “I can do this all day, you know,” he sighed, metamorphosing all of his pieces into Queens. “You can’t win.”
“But that doesn’t mean I’ll give up. You didn’t give up against us, after we’d captured everyone. Against insurmountable odds you distracted us, freed your friends, and even found the time to tell them to keep Fluttershy -”
“Don’t…” he growled, cutting her off.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to touch a nerve. It’s just that, well, you were really lucky. If it weren’t for their sympathy, you’d probably still be in the Canterlot garden acting as a nesting spot for birds,” she continued, forcing herself not to look at him. “I just wish I had friends who were kind enough to forgive me…”
“Don’t you dare bring her into this!” he roared, flipping the table and sending pieces scattering across the room. “You didn’t deserve any forgiveness!”
“And you did? You were a scourge on Equestria! Again and again, you’d cause messes, intentionally or not, and leave everyone else to clean up after you! Do you have any idea what being imprisoned in a statue is like for a mortal?” she barked, loosening the reins of her seething anger.
It was a gamble, possibly the biggest one she’d ever made, but there was no backing down. If he was so blissfully unaware of his actions and their repercussions, she’d force him to understand. Her survival instinct pleaded for her to flee, to fly away as fast as her wings could carry her, but it would be futile - he could catch her with a thought.
“Your little scheme took everything from me - everything!” she screeched, tossing his Queen at him. “Now you’re threatening to have me subjected to it again!”
“Give me one reason I shouldn’t,” Discord snarled.
“Because,” she gulped, her mouth suddenly dry, “I was hoping she would have left you with some compassion.”
Though he went rigid, there was some subtle shift within him. The change was almost imperceptible, the slightest twitch on his face, but she spotted it nonetheless. She couldn’t relent, couldn’t back down, so she pressed her attack before he could reply.
“You tricked us into working for you, all in some harebrained plot to give Twilight confidence! Sombra is gone, Tirek and Chrysalis are still imprisoned somewhere, and I’m being hunted down for crimes I didn’t commit! I don’t know if this is all some sick joke to you but I know Fluttershy would be very disappointed,” she added, taking a wounded, disapproving tone.
“You woke me up! You charged in here, destroyed her house, and then have the audacity to speak about her like you knew her!” he shouted.
“I’m sorry for disturbing your beauty rest, alright! I didn’t ask for any of this to happen - heck, I don’t even understand what’s going on! Now, if we’re done here, either let me and my friends go or bring me to Twilight and be done with it!” she demanded.
Discord sat mute, his shoulders went slack, and his gaze fell to the floor. The chairs, game board, and chess pieces disappeared, as he turned away from her. She glided to the floor, giving him space. There was no need to continue, having dealt him such a blow.
“I do know what it’s like, you know,” he muttered.
“What what’s like?” she asked, holding her ground.
“Watching something slip through your grasp. Losing something you…” he sniffed, keeping his back turned. “It’s why I slept…”
Cozy kept quiet, allowing the scene to unfold. As unthinkable as it was, Discord looked smaller than he ever had. Even with all of his titanic might, in that moment, he’d been brought low. She was many things, but a sadist was not one of them. The contempt she felt for him waned, replaced by something she’d never expect to feel for the creature.
“I would have given anything - anything to stay with her,” he whimpered, his frame shuddering, “but she didn’t want me to…”
“Why not?” she softly pressed.
“She said that the world needed me - me, the one who time and again almost ruined everything,” he callously laughed, peering over his shoulder at her.
“I’m sure you could still help everyone. You rescued the Elements from Chrysalis,” Cozy asserted, taking a step forward.
“And that was it - even then, I was doing it for her. After Twilight took the throne, everything just became so much more tranquil; everyone got along, crises were averted before they began, and I was actually happy…” he exhaled. “Once she was gone, I tried - stars above I tried to find that happiness again, but I couldn’t. You talk about losing everything, like you’re the only one who knows how it feels. Well, you’re not,” he spat, turning to face her.
It was worse than she could have ever anticipated. Discord wasn’t weakened - he was broken. Fluttershy had given him something he likely never had and, with her passing, taken it away. The age old axiom ‘tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all’ had been his undoing.
“The only place I still have her is my dreams,” he whispered. “It’s why I abandoned everything and everyone; they didn’t need me anyways.”
“But I need you - we need you,” she argued, waving to Anon and Flurry. “Something is wrong. Twilight would never set me free just to recapture and imprison me again; you have to see that.”
“It’s not my concern,” he mumbled.
Discord’s woe ebbed into vacant disinterest, as he looked over to the incapacitated human and alicorn. Though she may have managed to disarm him, she could tell he had next to no interest in helping her, Anon, or Flurry in any capacity. With few other alternatives left, she tempted fate a second time.
“Fluttershy wouldn’t have said that,” she scoffed.
He clenched his fists, sudden fury bleeding from his every extradimensional pore, as he set his jaw. Reality itself seemed to warp around him, distorting in a dizzying array of ripples. The shift in his temperament was jarring, to say the least. To see him sorrow transition into outright rage was easily amongst the most terrifying things she’d ever seen. She could feel it, the raw, unfettered intensity of his barely checked wrath, yet she didn’t shy away.
“What do you want,” he rumbled.
“A chance - just time to piece this all together and try to make things right,” she boldly requested, staring at what was a face of inconceivable malice.
Without looking away from her, he raised his hand, pressed two digits together and snapped. In a brilliant flash, Flurry and Anon disappeared from the room. Before Cozy could ask what happened to them, she found herself floating a hair’s breadth in front of his snout.
“I’ll do you one better - since you need help so badly, I’ll give you just that,” he jeered, a wicked grin splitting his features. “But,” he added, raising a finger, “you had better pray you never see me again - if you do, there won’t be any talk…”
His low, sinister laugh cut through the air, as Cozy’s world winked out of existence. There was a pop of displaced air, a blinding light, then nothingness. It was like flipping a switch; one second, she was floating before an incensed cosmic being - the next, she fell unconscious.
She had no way to tell how long she’d been out, or where on Equestria she’d been whisked away to, but she eventually awoke. Something bright crossed over her face, causing her to stir. As soon as her higher functions returned, she leapt to her hooves and looked around in a panic.
Worn wooden walls surrounded her, packed earth rested beneath her, and the sun shone through the smudged glass of a window. There was a doorway, yet only the open air separated her from leaving the small structure. Though she couldn’t say exactly where she was, it appeared as though she’d found herself in a shed of some sort.
Cautiously, silently, she peeked her head outside and surveyed the area. The structure she’d awoken in rested on a small hillock, surrounded by grassy marshland. There was only one other building visible, a small dwelling some distance away, yet it seemed to be as run down as the shack she’d woken up in. So far as she could tell, there wasn’t another soul around - save for the frogs croaking somewhere off in the distance.
As for Flurry or Anon, there was no trace. She’d gotten what she wanted, escape, but it had cost her dearly. Wherever she was, it was extraordinarily remote and she hoped she’d have some time to recuperate and rest before anyone showed up looking for her. As the excitement and dismay of her confrontation with Discord bled away, the aches and pains of the earlier scuffle grew stronger and stronger.
There was some discomfort whenever she took a deep breath, she was disoriented from the abrupt teleportation, and the fact that she’d stared down a very angry demigod left her beyond exhausted. Regardless of what she chose to do, a respite from the maddening pace of the last day was needed. Trotting out, she made her way towards what she assumed to be an abandoned house.
Crossing to the larger building, her ears swiveled towards the slightest sounds. Even if she thought she may be alone, she wouldn’t put it past the chaotic deity to fling her into some sort of trap. Avoiding the door, she proceeded to one of the structure’s windows, laboriously flew to the sill, and peered inside. There, lying on a shabby rug, was Flurry.
Cozy didn’t move, too wary to immediately see herself inside. If it was some sort of trap, she’d much prefer the open sky be above her. Hopping to the ground, she snatched up a small rock. Alerting anyone who may be present wasn’t ideal under any circumstance, but at least she’d have more freedom of movement outside. Drifting back to the window, she kept her eyes on the doors leading out of the room.
“Flurry,” she called, keeping her voice low. Nothing - the alicorn didn’t stir. Taking aim, she flung the pebble at the mare. The small stone impacted the Princess’ flank, eliciting a light groan from the limp pony. “Flurry,” she repeated, a bit louder this time.
The second quiet cry, paired with the rock, did the trick. Flurry’s eyes fluttered open and she lifted her head. Dazed and confused, her eyes adjusted to the low light of the room, scanning its contents, before coming to rest on the window. “Cozy?” she dully asked, rubbing her face.
“Ssssssssh,” Cozy hissed, flitting through the window and to the Princess’ side. “Keep quiet, I don’t know where we are or if we’re alone.”
“Where are Anon and Discord?” Flurry asked.
“I’m not sure,” Cozy responded, “but I don’t think we’ll be seeing Discord again - at least, I hope we won’t.”
She suppressed a shiver, reminiscing on his haunting final words. She’d really rather not have another run-in with him, considering she’d managed to royally tick him off, to the point where speaking his name gave her chills. It was an all too real possibility that he was listening in on them, perhaps as some twisted form of entertainment, so she wasn’t going to risk summoning the eldritch creature.
“If you are here, Anon might not be far away; we should have a look around for him and anything of use,” she explained, stepping back to let the Princess stand.
“Where are we, anyways?” Flurry inquired, scanning the room.
“I’m not sure, but it looks remote. Maybe after we check the house and go outside, you’ll have some idea,” Cozy stated, leading to one of the doorways leading out of the chamber.
Creeping through the building and taking care to check any cupboards or drawers they came across, it became evident that the building was derelict. With only one floor, the two made short work of the reconnaissance. There was a kitchen, restroom, the living room where Flurry had been found, and a small bedroom. The only two places left to explore were a pair of closed doors.
Cozy had to admit, having the alicorn along with her was an immense relief. Slinking through an abandoned home wasn’t what she’d consider a fun adventure, so having someone beside her was a definite comfort. Moving to one of the two mysterious doorways, with the Princess at her side, she flitted to the knob.
“Ready?” she asked, looking over to her companion. Flurry nodded, standing to one side of the archway.
Turning the knob, Cozy gave the door a shove and retreated. If something was in there, being intruded upon should get some sort of reaction. The ponies waited, listening intently for a moment, before craning their necks to glance inside. To her surprise, she found Anon sprawled out on the floor.
“Anon!” Flurry bleated, heedlessly rushing in to the man. Grabbing his shoulder, she shook and jostled the man. “Anon, are you ok?!”
Cozy bit back a reprimand, as she glided to the alicorn’s side. Even with the element of stealth abandoned, due to Flurry’s somewhat excited reaction, she couldn’t help but smile. She’d managed to find both of her compatriots, albeit under less than optimal conditions.
“W...wha…” Anon moaned, gazing up at the two. “What happened?”
“The short version is I may have upset an insanely powerful being, but at least we’re out of harm’s way,” Cozy sighed. She could fill them in on the details later, if they insisted - for now, she hoped her explanation would suffice. “Before you ask, no, I don’t know where we are. Nothing has changed, we recover our strength, find a way to gather information, then we’ll plan our next step.”
Anon pushed himself up, barely getting to his feet before stumbling down to one knee. “Why is everything spinning?”
“Probably because we got teleported. It has that effect sometimes,” Flurry cooed, stroking the man’s back.
“I...I didn’t think I could be teleported,” he croaked, squeezing his eyes shut.
“If anyone could do it, it would probably be Discord,” Cozy sighed, keenly aware that she’d mentioned him for a second time. “He’s more powerful than an alicorn - heck, alicorns.”
“Remind me not to do that again anytime soon or ever,” Anon groused, unsteadily rising.
“Are you going to be ok? There’s just one more area of the house we have to check, then we can rest for a bit. Flurry and I can get it, if you’re not feeling well,” Cozy asserted.
“No...No, I’ll be alright,” he grumbled, stumbling to the doorway.
Cozy nodded, appreciative of his resolve. She could remember the first time she’d been teleported, ages ago, and it had been a strikingly unpleasant experience. Trotting out of the room and giving him plenty of time to slowly follow, she led the way towards the remaining unexplored area of the home.
The final door rested at the back of the kitchen and, if she had to guess, it was probably just a closet or a pantry - still, she’d rather be safe than sorry. With her companions just behind her, the diminutive pegasus stepped to the threshold, turned the knob, and swung the door outward. A set of rickety stairs led downward, into the cold gloom of a basement.
“I got this,” Flurry proclaimed, igniting her horn and forging ahead into the darkness.
Trotting behind her, with Anon taking the rear, Cozy kept close to the Princess. The trio made their way down, only pausing once they reached the bottom of the stairs. It appeared as though the cellar was almost entirely composed of one cavernous room. Besides a set of shelves, resting along one cobblestone wall, there was only one other archway in the back.
“Are those…” Flurry muttered, moving towards a row of cylinders on one rack. “Guys, they are! Pickles!”
Piquing a brow, Flurry sailed over to the suspect goods. Grabbing one jar and moving it towards the alicorn’s glowing horn, she closely inspected the glass container. To her amazement, it seemed fine. While there was the slightest bit of rust on the ringed rim, the top was still vacuum sealed. Quickly examining the other canisters, she found they were all in decent condition - furthermore, there was quite a selection.
Pickled beets, carrots, and cucumbers occupied two of the shelves - while a hooffull of jams and jellies rested below. There weren’t nearly as many of the sweets available, but that was irrelevant. If they rationed it carefully, there was enough food there to last them two or maybe three days, and that wasn’t taking into account anything they could forage from outside.
Honestly, the provisions were quite the unexpected blessing. Though the upstairs was nearly empty, they had discovered a few linens and a somewhat questionable pillow in a closet. It may not have seemed like much, but it would let them get by in relative comfort for a time.
“Guys,” Anon called, drawing her attention.
She and Flurry looked over at the man, as he stood just outside the lone doorway leading to the unknown. He stepped back, his eyes locked on something out of sight, and motioned for them to join him. Leaving the preserved goods, the two ponies made their way to his side.
“I think there’s something in there…” he whispered, pointing to the shadows.
Pouring more magic into her horn, Flurry moved forward. As the light of her magic fought back the darkness, the small room came into view. Hardly bigger than a broom closet, the area was walled by the same cobblestone as the rest of the basement. The table in the middle of the floor wasn’t what held their attention - no, it was what lay curled on the piece of furniture that held their eyes.
Motionless, save for its slow, steady breathing, a figure rested on the surface. Colored jet black, with hints of a deep cerulean here or there, its details were next to impossible to make out. Inching closer, Cozy squinted up at the thing. There was something familiar about it, almost…
It shifted, its limbs seemingly pulling in to hug itself. A single bony protrusion appeared, from amidst a swath of flattened hair. Long and jagged, pockmarked with holes and divots, the wicked looking appendage left little room for doubt. There was only one creature that Cozy had ever seen with something of the sort.
Staring at the slumbering beast, Cozy felt a curious mixture of emotions; relief and joy struggled with the fact that they had yet another complicating factor on their hooves. It seemed as though Discord’s favor included more than just their freedom and a reprieve from being hunted down - still, given whom they’d happened upon, it was a mixed blessing.
“I...is that…” Flurry trailed off, taking several steps back.
“If it’s not,” Cozy breathed, “it’s either the bravest or stupidest changeling I’ve ever seen…”
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it's Chrysisy
10385262
Or is it?!?
But really, it is...
Discord being able to use his magic on a character that's otherwise immune to magic is honestly kinda terrifying. Much like Discord himself. Absolute props to you for nailing his characterization and how easily and casually he warps reality around him.
10385353
Not outright immune, but highly resistant.
10385359
Near immune, my bad.
10385360
To be fair though, we're talking about a being that can effortlessly re-write the laws of physics and distort the fabric of reality itself. As you said, Discord is, was, and always will be one of the most terrifying powers in all of Equestria - that is, if he really wanted to be.
10385367
It's why Discord is so much fun. He can be anything from a jovial trickster to a near Lovecraftian horror depending on his mood and whoever he's dealing with. Or a jovial trickster who's getting his kicks by warping reality in near brain breaking ways for no other reason than he can. Equestria is lucky that when Fluttershy passed, he holed himself up instead of giving into grief and going on a rampage again.
And here I was hoping he would just teleport them to Twilight's throne room and be done with it.
I noticed the new tags, clever the story will not be releasing any spoilers for the foreseeable future, so anything can happen...
Discord btw is absolutely terrifying the last thing you want to do is make eye contact with him for now, unless you have a death wish.
Thankfully for Cozy and Co. they have a place to set up as their HQ thanks to Discord, it also looks like we will have another 'good, old friend from the past' let's hope introductions are easy to sort out without any voilent outburst and hope that she isn't suffering any.. side effects from being stoned for a few centuries...
We can thank Discord again for that, he does have compassion, see.....?
I thinkMeanwhile we got the unfortunate truth that something tragic happened with the Princess of Love sadly.
________________________________________________________________________________________________
The truth of Princess Flurry Hearts friend list is also revealed... Her total number of friends are in the single digits
Something is horrifically wrong with Twilight Sparkle the probably not anymore Princess of Friendship to allow a travesty to happen to her Niece her NIECE, her Brother's Daughter and her former Foal sitters Daughter, she should've have made some proper friends by now, or made political allies by now but from seeing this quote..
It's points to Flurry Heart being still hopelessly Navtive of the world around her and not expecting that a situation like the one she is trapped in now could ever happen.
This suddenly poped into my head but did Twilight ever tell/teach Flurry of the the sunshine, sunshine lady birds awake song and dance she did with her mother?
I also noticed that she did recognise some guard's name, so it points to Flurry seeming to attempt to socialize with her follow ponies and make friends. Just not permanent ones sadly, maybe her last batch of friends died a hundred years ago and this has frightened her to make new ones?
Still forgetting to get political allies to back you is a serious mistake for the Rules of Rulers
You should watch this video, it is very insightful in the rules that nation leaders are usually forced to follow.
https://youtu.be/rStL7niR7gs
Heck does Flurry even rule the Crystal Empire at all, we never got a answer and even if she did govern the
puppetstate Twilight would still more than likely have control of the keys of the Crystal Empire to power, with the exception of the Crystal Heart itself and the Crystal ponies.Well that's as much as I will question for today but still we have the anomaly of Spike the Dragon still missing for at least 100 years now.
The Royal Sisters unaccounted for and the state of the rest of the world, getting a newspaper is a up most priority, thankfully Cozy and .Co do happen to know a master of disguises nearby.
So Discord as a concept terrifies me.
And good God that line
The closest thing this universe has to a god is quoted as being broken.
This isn't your average everyday broken
This is,
Advanced Broken
Great chapters and I look forward to more.
Yay!
I love Chrysalis!
This is gonna be good!
discord's broken, twilight's insane(or there's corruption in the guard/ruling system), and the gang is in the middle of bumfuck nowhere
it's really kicking off, eh
Changelings who hate Chrysalis and want to keep her in stone or dead are framing Cozy because they think she’ll lead to Chrysalis being released?
10385966
That's quite the possibility.
Well now I'm wondering where tf Tirek might be...
Freaking loving this story, keep it up my dude!
Please have cozy be able to apologize to discord in some form of letter that he'll get at the very least I mean he doesn't want to ever see her again I know that but if she can write a letter to him it would be a nice gesture
If this is sticking to the canon where all changelings are reformed I think we might have gone back in time
10384499
Well, so far I'm seeing shades of Princess Twilight going off to sulk, sending Sci Twi back in her stead, and I'm pretty sure the Tree of Harmony has decided to set Cozy free because something has gone horribly non-harmonious.
That, or this is all a Simulation.
I mean, hundreds of years have gone by, yet somehow Ponyville still has locations like Sugarcube Corner? Either that's the most robust bakery in existence, or it's just the historical HQ for the Sugarcube Corporate Conglomerate.
And that's not even accounting for other small inconsistencies that pop up in relation to the supposed amount of time passed.
Either way, we'll see in a few days.
10385869
I've been to Bumfuck, Nowhere.
Their diners are nice. Plus they have a charming gift shop.
Cozy recognized she cannnot plan around anything until she identifies all the pieces in the board. Time to ask the details of the present era, including hard topics like the fates of Cadence, Spike, Tia and Lulu, etc..
Loving this story so far. My theory is that Flurry ran away from home, possibly away from her mother which is why she was reported missing. This makes sense since she sours at the mention of her mom and her sheltered childhood would make her want to get out more. Especially because she heard Cozy was getting out she'd be interested in meeting this hundreds year old villain.
I think it would be the right time for Cozy to ask Flurry and Anon some questions about the current state of things. Especially with Chrysalis in the mix now, Cozy needs to get her major pieces (information) into play.
10386336
10386395
There'll be some answers this afternoon
10386432
I hope so! Your writing style is really engaging, I really hope you decide to write more stories like this. Only comparable fic I've seen on here is Fallout Equestria. Your action scenes are very reminiscent of Kkat's style. The lack of information is a good writing technique since it keeps the reader interested and builds up the mystery. I only have a few small gripes about characterization in some instances.
First, I think that really Cozy would have asked Flurry and Anon the important questions when they got to Fluttershy's sanctuary since there was a fairly long break in action at that point. Also, the way you wrote her in chapter 1 and 2 feels more true to her character, but in later chapters you write her as though she cares about what happens to others when her whole personality is that she's manipulative and selfish. Cozy wouldn't be willing to sacrifice herself to keep Anon and Flurry safe since they're merely minor pieces on the board. Idk maybe you have a more charitable interpretation of her character, but it would have been better to see some incentive for her to start caring before she's willing to be so selfless.
I also don't think Discord would simply go to sleep when Fluttershy passed away, he likes interfering and causing chaos too much, not to mention his outlook is generally positive and he doesn't hang onto the past much. In fact, while Starlight is very sensitive about her misdeeds, Discord casually mentions terrorizing Equestria like its just Tuesday for him. I can see him going into hibernation if he felt that everyone didn't want him around anyway, but that's not the impression we get at the end of the series.
10386491
About that
When faced with the guards, she viewed their potential freedom as a possible out. If Anon and Flurry were left free, they'd likely try to liberate her
In regards to Discord, with nothing left to lose, the same principal applies - to a lesser extent, sure, but she'd still consider them as potential allies
Alright, I'm sold. This will be epic.
10386153
Huh. Didn't know that. Okay then
I will be honest about the whole Cozy Glow thing, they should of NEVER made her. Here's why...
-She was introduced into the franchise two seasons towards the end of it, which I felt was WAY too late to make her a supervillian.
-She had a lack of a backstory, heck SOMBRA had a better backstory than her.
-And just straight up, she was a kid.
Honest it never sat right with me seeing another full Equestrian villian being created into the franchise. What made it worse was the fact that they introduced Grogar as well. And with him being a legendary villian, I felt like HE was the appropriate villian for the alliance and the finale, not Cozy Glow.
10386616
My english is a bit antiquated, due to devouring scads of older literature.
10386653
She got the short end of the stick, that's for damn sure. No real development or proper conclusion, just a megalomaniacal filly with dreams of world domination.
That being said, she's a damn treat to write.
10386659
couldn't of said it better myself
im enjoying the story so far my only complaint is cozy feels off there no villainous to her it like she not even a villain, she should still think selfishly she not know flurry or anon enough yet to really care and have genuine friendship with them, she should have thoughts of abandoning them for her safety only siding with them because it increases her own survival,
10386699
I beg to differ.
She's a villain of renown. If she did abandon Anon and Flurry, she'd have nowhere to go and nobody to run to. She's marked and, if Twilight's order is/was made public, she'd be wanted throughout the land.
10386653
Sometimes we don't need that, it's just fun watching evil.
I never understood why some people interpreted the finale as saying that the Legion are still sentient and aware of time passing. That would be like solitary confinement, and would rapidly degrade their mental health. Just very out of character for the Princesses. Sure, Discord said he could hear Celestia that one time, but any rules of physiology don't really work for that guy. Assuming that the spell cast by the Princesses and Discord at the end would have worked exactly the same as what the Elements would do to Discord. Still, since the show didn't explicitly state otherwise, its fine for someone to write that interpretation.
Okay, this I can't believe, and it sounds like you're writing for a totally different character. When the it comes to Cozy, the most generous assessment you can give her is that she enjoys the humiliation and pain of only her enemies. Which Discord definitely ranks among. If the idea was that she was undergoing a change (either from her imprisonment or Anon's influence) I could buy that. But this just feels like a false statement, to say she didn't exhibit that kind of cruelty.
Bye, Douchecanoe!
Yay, best bughorse!
AGH, you jerk, I'm at work and now I crave pickles!
10386653
starlight is the lasted mlp villain that's retained level of disturbing and intimidation.
seasons after that basically knocked down all established lore and characters down couple of pegs. even the literal hell 'tartarus' got turned into typical dungeon prison.