Equestria's Ray of Hope

by The_Darker_Fonts

Unmasked

“Pelios, how’s it going,” Ray hollered as he walked up to the water’s edge. The general was maybe six feet into the ocean, where the water swelled to just above his abdomen. The beach was crowded, of course, with possibly thousands of soldiers down at the shore to relax and stay cool even as the sun began to set. The stallion glanced away from the group of Fallen he was chatting with and smiled brightly as he spotted the human nearby.

“Excellent, Ray,” he shouted back over the din, quickly gesturing for the human to join them. Not needing any further invitation, he stepped into the waves, sand tickling his feet as it sifted between his toes. The ocean was by no means cold, the warm water a relief that would only be noticed given just how hot the day was. Still, as he closed in on the group, it only came halfway up his shins, leaving him virtually untouched by the water. Reaching up a hoof for an informal shake, Pelios gleefully asked, “You got time for a game or two before you hafta get to Equestria?”

“No, unfortunately I don’t, but that’s why I’m here, actually,” Ray replied regretfully. “You see, Pelios, I’d like you to escort me to the wayport, if you have the time, of course.”

“For you, sir, always,” the stallion replied without his smile fading in the slightest. Turning to his pack of friends, he told them, “Guess this evens out the teams anyways. I’ll be back as soon as I wanna be, just make sure you don’t lose the stones again!”

“You got it,” one of them, a greenish stallion replied before filling in the gap left by Pelios as he joined Ray.

“Sorry to pull you away from that,” Ray apologized as he stepped out of the ocean, Pelios close behind him.

“Oh, it’s no problem, lordling,” the general faithfully assured him. “Whaddya need?”

“Well general, it’s come to my attention that some of your actions have gone unnoticed, and frankly I must address them properly,” Ray determined grimly, not turning to face him as he walked up the slope and towards the camp. “You see, I usually monitor and direct my army with precision, confronting anything that may pop up with the utmost clarity. However, it seems that I may have overlooked some vital occurrences concerning you, Pelios.”

“Sir,” the stallion questioned, his voice betraying a twinge of nervousness.

“If you’d follow me to our tent,” Ray directed, striding through the camp swiftly. He didn’t have that much time if he wanted to be on schedule for his visit to Equestria. After only a few long moments, though, they had made it to the generals’ tent, Ray pushing the flap aside and stepping inside. Pelios nervously followed, clearly confused as to this sudden tonal shift.

Leaning against a stack of crates near the table with a half-drawn map on it, Ray took a deep breath in before telling him, “Pelios, I’ve been talking with our peers. It seems we’ve all come to a conclusion about you and your actions as of late.”

“Ray, I assure you that I only meant to help, whatever they may be,” the general stated, before glancing away. “Though I will face punishment for any shortcomings that may have occurred from my commandment of my soldiers.”

“That’s the thing, general,” Ray said, before cracking a slight smile at the stallion. “You’ve been an invaluable commander and incredible general, both when it comes to leading your soldiers on the field, planning and executing an operation, or simply caring for your soldiers off-duty. Your plan for the Second Battle of the Big Face was immaculate and worked wonders against the minotaurs, and while it was the archers who shone in combat, without your unique ploy, the minotaurs would’ve been in no such position. There is no doubt in my mind that you single-handedly prevented the deaths of hundreds of Fallen by presenting such a bold and unconventional plan to I and the others.

“However, there seems to have been nothing to show for it on your part, general. You see, after the First Battle of Big Face, the soldiers celebrated my aggressive plan that secured us the victory. I noticed no such celebration for your cunning scheme to bait the minotaurs to their deaths. It seems like a shame, especially because it saved many more lives than my own battle. Now, while I can’t try to force a celebration out of my soldiers, especially considering how far past the battle it is now, I can and will personally thank you. Thank you for your work, Pelios. Because of it, you’ve won us an incredible victory and allowed many hundreds of soldiers to continue fighting this war.”

Pelios was clearly taken aback, sitting stunned and silent as he stared at the human with wide eyes. Seeing he was wordless, the human crouched down to eye-level with the stallion and reached out, resting a hand on his shoulders. With a sincere smile, Ray summarized, “You’re an incredible general, great friend, and everybody should recognize that.”

“The Matriarch told you to say that, right,” he squeaked emotionally, in denial of the praise he was receiving.

“She said nothing of what to tell you,” the human replied softly. “She just informed me of how you were feeling and reminded me of a problem that I need to address. No general of mine will go unacknowledged for their contributions to our victory.” Pulling the stallion into a hug, Ray added, “And no friend of mine will begin doubting themselves just because I’ve been too blind to realize they need some encouragement. You were there for me when I had my moments of grief. I’ll be here for you if and when you have yours.”

“Thank you, lordling,” Pelios whispered hoarsely, wrapping a hoof around the human as well.

“It’s my pleasure,” he assured the stallion. Pulling away and standing up, he gave the stallion a nod and said, “I have to leave here shortly, but tomorrow, I’d like to meet this Inda I’ve heard about so much and seen so little.”

The stallion blushed clearly as his milky eyes flitted away, though he still replied, “O-o-of course, Ray. She’d like to finally meet you… I think…”

“Good, I’m looking forward to it,” the human cheerfully encouraged. Pushing through the tent flap, he stepped out into the camp and made his way swiftly towards the cliffside once again. The sun was rapidly descending, and given he wanted to spend as much time as he could with his family across the sea tonight, he couldn’t afford to be late. Picking up his pace, he began rapidly ascending the hill to the edge of the cliff, only taking a few minutes before he was once again out of the tents and nearing the edge of the cliff.

The Matriarch loomed near the southern cliffs, directly opposite of the wayport, and though it was clear she was communicating with someone in the bay, he felt her eyes on him. Smiling slightly, he gave no mind to her observant nature and continued on his way. There was a consistent dry wind blowing right now, rustling his hair and giving the night an early coolness, perfect for his visit. He arrived at the cliff top right as the sun finished its descent, the horizon glowing orange yet the moon and darkness dominating the sky. With an appreciative glance up at the celestial body, he quickly pulled out the medallion to activate the wayport.

Looking around briefly, he realized that this was, in fact, the first time he would not be accompanied with his departure, Skalos and everybody else doing something else. It wasn’t a sad thought, though, just a strange one. He would be leaving and returning perhaps without anybody even noticing his absence. Honestly, it was probably the preferable way to do it, his soldiers trusting in his timely return and Skalos not needing to nag Ray about being late. With a smile, he lifted up the medallion to the moon and caught a beam of its light, instantly becoming enveloped in soothing warmth.

Whether it was familiarity or tranquility, the moment of warmth passed quickly, and Ray gained his bearings in a matter of seconds, just in time to catch sight of Twilight sitting down in her chair.

“Oh, you’re promptly on time again,” she stated softly, looking pleased more than surprised. “I was hoping it wouldn’t be a one-time thing.”

“I plan on being more consistent,” he told her with a slight smile. “As much as I can control that factor, that is. This month, I just happened to be free and eager to return to Equestria. I miss the others.”

“Thought you might,” Twilight muttered with a nod, losing the pleased look. “We’ll be as fast as possible if we can. Have you…”

“We attempted to use the resupply to boost ourselves into a long offensive, but the weather has turned against us,” Ray explained quickly. “The heat reached over fifty degrees and when we moved to march out, several Fallen died of exhaustion and heat stroke. Had we attempted to push through the scorching weather, we would’ve suffered dozens, if not hundreds of dead and wounded from the venture. Any battle under those conditions would have also exacerbated our losses and left the army in disrepair for longer than usual. Given the heat is so intense, we remained at camp ever since we returned, with only a small number of spiderlings sent to scout out the north leaving since. Honestly, it’s probably for the best. The Fallen are having a vacation from the war, knowing the minotaurs can’t possibly reach us if we can’t attack them.”

“How sure are you of that fact,” Twilight questioned, brows furrowing slightly in concern.

“A hundred percent,” the human replied with confidence. “Minotaurs are built to withstand the sun, but not the heat. Their fur probably protects them from sunburns like yours does and keeps them warm in what are, presumably, cold winters. Much like your fur, though, it can entrap heat and give them a greater risk of strokes than our Fallen suffer from. Besides, fighting them from our current camp would be easy with the positioning of the Matriarch’s spiderlings and the three valleys they would have to strike from. Warfare in the Golden Wastes is predictable thanks to the dust an army kicks up while marching. We’d have ample time to recognize and react to any threat that approaches.”

The answer seemed to satisfy Twilight, who let out a soft sigh and stood up, relaxed. She stepped close to him and reached up, a silent invitation for embrace that Ray took gratefully. The alicorn was a strange friend, but one that Ray found comfort in now after so long of simply having a strictly professional relationship with. She was evidently correct about bringing him to defend Equestria, regardless of ethics, and that had been made clear in the past couple months. And, much like her, he was now a leader making choices that changed the course of tens of thousands of lives, bearing the weight of such responsibility he had never imagined. They were alike in that way, like he was with the Matriarch, only bound mortally.

“Are you ready to go then,” Twilight questioned, pulling from the embrace with a smile.

“More than ready,” Ray replied with an equal smile.

There wasn’t even a moment’s hesitation from Twilight as suddenly the world became a muddle of purple and sparkly magic. In an instant, though, it was all gone and the coolness of a winter night overtook him. He shook off the initial shock of the cold, having barely been in the palace long enough to register its diminished heat, his bare arms and legs now having grown used almost exclusively to heat. Still, there was a familiarity with the chill from last winter.

“Geez, last winter in Equestria,” he muttered looking over his surroundings. They were on the hill his home was built on, facing over a bright town that hadn’t quite gone to sleep yet in spite of the risen moon. His own home was alight and the windows open to let the yellow light flood the snow-spotted grass. He couldn’t actually see into the house from this slightly downhill angle, but he could certainly guess who all was in the house. It felt a bit strange, staring at the place he had lived for over a year after four months or so without seeing it. On Earth, he’d only known one home and one city, with the very rare travel to suburbs a few miles away for… bad tasks.

Dismissing those thoughts instantly, he turned to face the house- his house- on the hill and began walking up the frosty path to it. In spite of himself, he had let his guard slip at the unexpected and distracting thoughts of his life on Earth, and now Twilight was staring at him indiscreetly to his side. She already knew everything, maybe not quite understanding, but knew thanks to her prying into his life when she scouted him out. Still, she didn’t know what he was thinking now and based on who they were about to reunite with, he didn’t want her to get any of the wrong ideas.

“Just had a thought about Earth,” he explained quietly, slowing to almost a stop to look her in the eye. “Regrettable thoughts. Not… Pittsburgh in December, but… times when I helped bad things happen to people. It’s still strange my life ended up this way, but you know what the weirdest part is?”

“What,” Twilight eagerly indulged, eyes widening slightly.

“I no longer ask myself ‘How did I get here?’ These days, I find myself asking, ‘Who was that kid?’,” he admitted. There was a long moment of silence, Twilight clearly not knowing how to respond to such a statement. Finally, Ray took a breath before softly inquiring, “Twi, how did you know to pick me?”

“You were an incredibly talented, yet determined boy with so many perfections that would make you-”

“Not my characteristics, Twi, everyone’s told me enough about those,” he said with a sigh, noting how his breath puffed white in the air. “How, out of seven billion humans, did you find me?”

“I… I don’t know, exactly, I was just… drawn to something,” she explained quietly. “I kept searching through the humans that made sense, generals, leaders, idealists… and each wasn’t what I thought they were. Finally, I listened to that… well, it wasn’t exactly an audible hum, but a vibration I felt in my horn and heart, guiding me to… you. And when I saw everything, I wanted to turn away and reject the idea, but I kept watching, kept learning, and saw… saw the person you could be, the one Equestria would shape you to be. Somehow, I found you… an imperfect creature with the right constitution to become a leader. A hero.”

“It helped that I wouldn’t have any effect on Earth with my leaving,” he lightly added.

“And yet your life has irreversibly altered Equestria to be better,” Twilight countered brightly. “Your name is known in every land as well as my own or Celestia’s. I worried that I had been wrong, that I should have let you be and tried a different way, and yet-”

“Life has never been better for me, nor was it ever,” he concluded with a grateful smile. Looking up at the night sky, bright stars more abundant than on Earth occasionally interrupted by a puffy white cloud, illuminated by the blue moonlight, he thought out loud, “Maybe I was never meant for Earth.”

“I… maybe,” Twilight mumbled, conflicted. “If you think that’s the fate that you were meant to have.”

“The Matriarch always speaks of me like I’m a prophesied being, come for some sacred fate,” Ray shrugged. “I don’t believe I’m going to be a king or anything like that, maybe not even a hero, like you say, but I do think I was fated to be here. I have more purpose here than I ever dreamed of having. Perhaps it’s because I never dreamed on Earth. There was only a waking nightmare.”

Pausing silently, he finally added, “I do miss my family. Occasionally.”

“I’m sorry,” Twilight once again mumbled, guilt in her voice.

“I don’t regret this though,” he added before she could waste her breath on further apology. Kneeling down to be level to her, he stated clearly, “You gave me a new life, a better one, and I don’t care if the universe decrees that right or wrong. In my eyes, I’ve learned it was a good thing. You’re not a bad pony.”

“I-”

Twilight’s words failed her as Ray simply pulled her into another hug, this one not to ease her worry like before. Now, it was to show her clearly that he respected, admired, and was grateful for her. She had made the difficult decision of villainizing herself to cause a greater amount of good to be done, not just by Ray but by everyone else as well. A decisive, truly necessary evil that had brought to Equestria a chance to continue unyielding in its peaceful path.

After several long moments, he parted from her, giving her an embarrassed smile at her confused look and quickly explaining, “Sorry, but I can feel frost forming on my shoulders.”

“Oh, yeah, sometimes I forget you aren’t immune to the elements,” she laughed softly.

“They’re my one weakness,” Ray agreed jokingly, standing up and making his way up the path in step with Twilight. Before he even reached the door, however, it was yanked open and a pink flurry of motion shot out, completely enveloping his neck and shoulders with a loud squeal.

“Hi Pinkie-” was all he managed to say before the rest of the ponies within swarmed him, hugging him from wherever they could, the pegasi of the group wrapping themselves around his shoulder. He even felt Discord’s chicken claw somewhere on his back, though his vision was too obscured by fur to tell where the draconequus was. Laughing wholeheartedly, Ray did his best to reciprocate his affection with his arms while careful not to fall onto the ponies hugging his legs. Even Otolo managed to squeeze her way onto his shoulder, nibbling fiercely at his ear.

One by one, the ponies embracing him let go while he and Twilight continued to laugh - him in absolute relief and joy at seeing them all and her probably due to how enveloped he had become. He scanned the room as Ohs settled on his shoulder, all but one pony letting go of him. Looking down at his right leg, he found Apple Bloom latched on still, softly crying into his bare leg. His smile disappearing into a frown, he wanted to crouch down to her level and ask what was wrong but was at the same time prevented by her presence down there.

“Don’t make a scene now, Apple Bloom,” AJ chastised, though it was a half-hearted attempt at best. Apparently, she had some clue that this might happen, and glancing at a few of the ponies who hung around the back of the room, he found their faces equally… upset.

“And why can’t she make a point,” Rarity tightly questioned. She was seated near the entrance of the kitchen, her eyes slightly narrowed at the human. Instantly, a heat began to rise on the back of Ray’s neck, shame and regret for not visiting for at least a moment coming back to bite him now. “We had no clue as to whether we would see him tonight, nor do we know the next time we’ll see him again after dawn.”

Pursing his lips, Ray glanced around and mentally took note of each of the ponies who seemed most upset at him. Rarity, obviously, but also Big Mac, Sugar Belle, and Fluttershy. Interestingly, though he didn’t intend to notice, he saw Tender Taps just a few inches from Big Mac’s side. Now why would the Apples bring him into this?

“Eeyup,” Big Mac agreed shortly, his voice hard and his frown deep.

“You coulda at least said hello, showed us you were all right,” Sugar Belle stated, though of the four she seemed less angry and instead tired.

“Could I have, maybe, but I don’t think it would’ve been too reassuring had you seen me last month,” Ray replied, trying not to sound defensive. They were in the right here, but at the same time how could he explain to them the maelstrom of emotion that had clouded his judgment last time? “What did Twilight tell you?”

“Only that you were alive,” the alicorn informed him, taking a step out from behind him. Her expression was passive, expecting him to explain himself to them without her assistance. It was probably for the better, but he hated that she had left him out to dry on this alone. Then again, she had warned him, so he shouldn’t have been too surprised by this.

“We fought two battles,” he began with a sigh, looking down at the filly still hugging his leg. Carefully, he bent his left leg and kneeled so he was more on level with Apple Bloom. Reaching out and slowly running a hand through her soft mane, he continued to explain, “Last month, we moved out like we had planned to, and we found the enemy on day one. We fought them late into the night and won, but… we lost a good many soldiers. Then, for another almost two weeks we maneuvered around a second army that was present until we manipulated them into engaging us, and finally wiped out the enemy. From there, we retreated back to camp, with over three hundred less than we left with. One of them was a very close friend of mine, and a good stallion.”

“But wouldn’t seeing us help with that,” Sweetie Belle asked, earning a quick hush from her older sister for her outburst.

Looking up from Apple Bloom, he gave the other filly a sad smile and explained, “I wasn’t in the right mindset to see you. After everything that happened, I just couldn’t stop thinking about it all. My head was a mess of battle plans, fighting, and… death. You wouldn’t have been pleased to see me then, because I wasn’t the Ray you knew. I still wish I had gone to see you, but it would have only been more alarming for you to see me in that state, I think.”

“I still don’t get how makin’ us worry ‘bout ya even more by not showin’ up is any better,” Apple Bloom barked, finally speaking up bitterly.

“It wasn’t… isn’t, Apple Bloom,” he admitted softly. “I was being selfish at the time, thinking about myself, worrying what I might do to make you think things. Maybe Sweetie was right and seeing you would have alleviated the pain and confusion, but I still don’t think that’s the case. If you had known the things I had seen during that month or understood what choices I was forced to make-”

“If we knew, we would understand, but ya don’t tell us those things,” the filly snapped, looking up with furious, teary eyes. “How’re we ever s’posed ta know what yer thinkin’ if we never know you, huh? You’re just gonna leave us whenever ya want an’ expect us ta never question it?”

Shocked both by her anger and questions, Ray glanced at Applejack briefly. At first the mare seemed confused, though after a moment, she came to understand. With a slow nod, she told him, “Maybe it’s best if ya do explain yerself.”

From across the room, Ray caught slightest movement in the corner of his eye, and though he didn’t turn to look at it, he knew it was Fluttershy perking up. Instead, looking back down at Apple Bloom, he once again began petting her as he softly stated, “The Fallen aren’t so different from other ponies. In fact, they really are just glowing ponies with a knack for warfare. That makes them some of the best ponies in Equestria, and why I love them all dearly. I’ve made dozens of friends of all ranks and walks of life in the Fallen, and they’re all spectacular individuals with the potential for a whole new life when this is all over. It makes me hopeful, knowing that so many of these great people will one day get to live in a free, happy Equestria.

“Then, we go into battle and dozens of those lives are snuffed out in minutes, leaving their dreams and the dreams of those who loved them… dim.” Ray paused painfully. Three hundred fifty-eight lives and countless dreams gone after three battles and seven months of war. “See, a lot of the Fallen are married as well. You all probably already know about Skalos and Zecora, but there are at least a couple thousand married Fallen in the army. Not only that, but they’ve also had over fifteen hundred years to befriend one another and learn each other’s names, lives, and personalities. The death of even one Fallen is felt across the majority of the camp, and I am responsible for each Fallen death.”

“That’s not true though-” Scootaloo began to protest, before abruptly being silenced by Rainbow with a stern look. Glancing once again around the room, he found the ponies were no longer angry, but enthralled in his every word, horrified but wanting to know more.

“Every command I issue, every battle I engage, every choice I make to fight the minotaurs kills those beautiful ponies that willingly fight for me,” he punctuated. “It’s inevitable that there will be death on the battlefield, but my movements with the army and how I plan each battle is what decides who will be fighting where and when. That first battle we lost two hundred and twenty-four Fallen, five times more than we lost in the invasion, and while we killed tens of thousands of minotaurs, it did not feel like the astounding victory it was. I also lost one of my best friends in that battle, Garish, and informed his wife of the tragedy myself, another friend of mine. I… did not have the constitution to face you after that, even with weeks and another battle between that time.”

After a brief pause for contemplation, he continued. “The worst thing about fighting in the front lines with my soldiers is seeing them die. I’ve watched dozens of Fallen die in nameless ways, not even knowing who they were as they were speared or halved. I didn’t see Garish die, but he was cleaved through by a minotaur’s axe. All we could do was burn his body, as with those of all our Fallen, and release his ashes on the wind. The Fallen and ponies are not so different that, in my mind, I can’t unimagine the same happening to any one of you. I’ve seen the ruthlessness of minotaurs, and even those that can and do fight back against them can falter and be slain horrifically by them. Unarmed and incapable of resistance… Well, after two battles of killing and witnessing death, I only had the ability to explain what happened to Twilight and make sure that everything was set correctly for the resupply.”

The room was gloomy now, and in spite of the warm lights that staved off any shadows, Ray knew his words had left a darkness on the ponies around him. Most didn’t look at him anymore, staring at a fixed point in the floor or eyes closed and mouths pressed tight at his description of his struggles. Resolved, knowing they understood, he restated, “I really do regret not being with you all last month, and genuinely hope that we can have a wonderful rest of our night, but I need you to understand. Some nights will be like this, when things have calmed down and I look forward to visiting you, and others you’ll have to forgive me for showing up dour and unable to smile. I promise that- from now on- I won’t miss a single visit, but if I’m being silent, or if I’m barely able to force a smile, know it’s because I’ve most likely had to release more of my wonderful Fallens’ ashes to the wind.”

“Okay,” Apple Bloom agreed, her voice so quiet Ray didn’t know if anyone but him had heard it. Looking up at him, she managed a little smile and reached a hoof up to his face, wiping aside a few tears that had begun to slide down his cheek. The filly looked as if she’d had her share of crying for the day, and was set out to look as strong as possible for him. Smiling at the sentiment, Ray gave her one last pat on the cheek before standing up again and allowing Tender Taps to take her hoof comfortingly. In spite of himself, Ray’s eyes flitted to the older Apple siblings, finding AJ… stone-faced and Big Mac simply nodding. Well, at least one of them approved.

“There are raspberry pies in the kitchen,” Sugar Belle suddenly proclaimed, giving Ray a nervous smile. He could tell his words had left the ponies shaken, and rightfully so. They weren’t designed for the kinds of things he had described, hence his being here, but if they were going to push and prod, he would draw back the curtain on his dark life out on the Golden Plains. Maybe then they would at least recognize his turmoil and leave him be for their own sakes. In spite of victory after victory thus far, there was always the dark potential of him not returning one night.

“That’s great, because I forgot to have dinner,” Ray stated, smiling warmly and pushing away thoughts of the world across the sea. “I was busy getting caught up in the ocean, y’know? There are these massive cliffs all along the coast save for the few miles stretch we landed on. They give you the most spectacular view of the ocean from so high up.”

“Wow, really,” Scootaloo asked, her attention instantly piqued. Sweetie and Pinkie also seemed enthralled by his description of the distant land, so he continued on. “There are many incredible scenes out there, on the Tauran plains. The hills are endless and covered in a thin layer of grass burnt golden by the sun. This month it hit fifty-five degrees outside at noon, or at least that’s what Kraven is guessing since our thermometers only go up to fifty. There’s one particularly big hill that has its north side completely sheared off, leaving a hundreds-foot long cliff. Kraven named it the Big Face. There’s also a valley out to our south that Kraven aptly named the Deep Crevice with a massive waterfall and lake, the only freshwater source we’ve seen in all our time there.”

“No lakes or rivers,” Scootaloo questioned, befuddled.

“Not even a creek,” the human confirmed, stepping into the kitchen and smiling wide at the raspberry pies stacked onto the table. Otolo swooped from his shoulder and landed next to the most prominent of the bunch, taking a large peck out of it. Grabbing the slice the bird had taken a nibble out of, he called over his shoulder, “These look delicious, Sugar Belle. Anything new to ‘em?”

“Not intentionally,” she replied.

“Well, they certainly look delicious,” he determined before taking a bite out of it.

“Yo, leave some for us,” Rainbow jokingly protested, flapping over to land on the other side of the table. With a smirk, Ray gestured at the remaining slices and other pies on the table, mouth too full to say anything.

Ohs let out a little chirp of approval as she swallowed down her bite, and as soon as the human managed to force the massive chomp down, he told the cook, “That was really good, thanks.”

“No biggie,” she waved off with a shrug, hoof intertwined with Big Mac’s.

“You should check out my new scarlett velvet strawberry cupcakes,” Pinkie exclaimed, bouncing to Rainbow’s side and revealing a tray of deep red pastries. Eyeing the miniature cupcakes with mock caution, he reached out and grabbed one before popping it into his mouth. Giggling a little, the pink pony rubbed her head as she stated, “Guess I forgot to make ‘em human-sized, eh sport?”

“What,” Ray sputtered with a confused smile, not quite sure where the crazy mare’s new slang was coming from.

“Well, I’m Momma Pinkie now, so I gotta begin practicing my momma talk with everypony,” she surmised with a proud grin. “I really wanted to bring the twins, but Cheesy pointed out that they would not be happy campers at this party. So, he’s staying home with them while I’m here with you all!” Sobering up slightly, she softly muttered, “It’s actually been a while since everypony was here…”

“It sure has felt like it, that’s fer sure,” Applejack joined in, scooting up next to Rainbow’s side and taking their hoof. In spite of himself, it made Ray smile a little harder. The two deserved each other, for certain.

“Sometimes I forget how many of ‘us’ there are,” Discord commented, slithering through the air to nab a cupcake from Pinkie’s tray. “There’s almost not enough room for us all in a house built for a giant! Isn’t that a conundrum?”

Even though he had grabbed the cupcake, the draconequus simply turned it into solid silver before lazily stuffing it straight into his stomach, causing Scootaloo to roll her eyes at the demonstration. Swallowing her bite of pie, she grumbled, “It’d be a little cramped if we weren’t all crowded in the same room.”

“And that, my dear filly, is where you’re wrong,” Discord disproved the pegasus, his arms detaching from his body. “You all and you’re surrogate older siblings are in here, while Fluttershy and Rarity are-”

While the draconequus’ claw continued to point out each pony present, his paw smacked over his mouth to silence him. At first, Discord gave the rogue appendage a confused glare, reattaching his other appendage and peeling away the paw. Thoroughly annoyed, he loudly inquired, “Now what was that fo… Oh!”

His eyes went wide and he realized something so abruptly that, for a moment, he forgot to uphold himself. Flopping out of the air, he landed smack dab in the middle of the table, splattering pastries everywhere. Otolo fluttered off Ray’s shoulder, twittering furiously at the clumsy draconequus while the others let out little shouts of surprise or dismay at the sudden shower of fruity goos.

“Aw, c’mon now,” Scootaloo angrily exclaimed, looking down at the raspberry splattered all over her.

“Sorry, sorry,” Discord quickly apologized, snapping his fingers while sweating an unnecessary amount considering it was still relatively chilly inside. In an instant, a menagerie of cleaning utensils appeared and wiped away the mess, leaving everyone sputtering and shoving the intrusive cleanup crew away. With an embarrassed little bow, the draconequus assured them, “I’m sure I can pull a few cakes and pies from… somewhere. Just give me a sec!”

With that, Discord popped out of existence, leaving Ray stunned and slightly confused. Staring at the spot where he had been, the human slowly took a bite of his remaining slice of pie, Ohs settling back down on his shoulder, disheartened.

“Yeah, Discord’s been a bit weird ever since he moved in with Fluttershy,” Sweetie Belle nonchalantly mumbled through her own bite of pie.

“Wha-” Ray began to exclaim before choking on his bite of pie, devolving into a coughing fit. Turning around and stumbling to the kitchen sink, he coughed out the pie into the sink before wiping his face down and turning back to the wide-eyed filly. “What?”

“Discord and Fluttershy are sharing a home now,” Sugar Belle quickly explained.

“And we don’t know if they’re sharing anything else,” Rainbow added with a smirk, earning a light punch from AJ.

“It ain’t like that,” the earth pony clarified, rolling her eyes. “Fluttershy’s jus’ given him a place to stay now. He doesn’t gotta make his home wherever now.”

“Okay,” Ray nodded, wrapping himself around the new information. He was glad for them… at least, he thought he was. It was hard to tell. The news was broken in such an unorthodox fashion that he still found it a bit difficult to set aside his surprise from his actual emotions, but he hoped he was happy for them. Glancing into the living room from where he stood, he saw there was nobody within, meaning the only places the three missing mares could be was upstairs, undoubtedly in his room. So they had something to talk about…

“Hey, I think Rarity and Fluttershy need to talk to me, so I’m gonna see what they want,” he informed the group bluntly. No reason to try and hide the obvious from them, especially because he was trying to prove he was being open with them.

“Yeah yeah, go do your adult things,” Scootaloo drawled. “Just don’t let it take too long.”

“Of course,” he assured them. He opened his mouth to tell them he was going to back in only a few minutes, when suddenly Discord popped back into reality with a whole new set of cakes and pies.

“Tada,” he exclaimed, proudly presenting the new assortment of pastries, setting them neatly across the table.

Smiling at the draconequus, whose back was to Ray, the human slipped through the entrance of the kitchen back into the living room and made his way up the stairs. Discord was such a distraction that he doubted they would notice until after the Lord of Chaos had settled down a little. Making his way down the short hall, he found the door to his bedroom cracked open expectantly. Hovering by the door for just a minute, he listened in.

“I think the hemline was just a bit too revealing on my last piece,” Rarity was saying.

“Well, most times I wouldn’t wear a dress anyway, so it’s only revealing what everypony’s already seen,” Twilight thoughtfully reminded the mare.

Small talk. Maybe a good sign that he wasn’t walking into a verbal minefield? He couldn't be certain, but there was no use in delaying regardless. Breathing slowly, he pushed the door open and walked in without missing a beat.

Instantly their conversation died, all three mares turning to look at him as he entered. Rarity and Fluttershy were sitting on his bed and wore impartial expressions, though thankfully Twilight gave him a warm smile to ease some of his tension. Giving Rarity and Fluttershy a wary look, he softly stated, “Figured you wanted to talk with me.”

“Indeed we do,” Rarity agreed, nodding… politely? She didn’t seem expressly upset now, not like she had before his explanation, but clearly there were still some reservations. After a long moment of silence, the unicorn turned to Fluttershy expectantly, but the mare simply shrank back more.

“I don’t want to say it… now that I know why,” Fluttershy meekly mumbled, refusing to meet any of their prying eyes.

“You were upset,” Ray carefully prodded.

The mare flinched at his question, glancing over at Twilight before slowly nodding once. “I… after not having heard from you in a month and upon hearing I wouldn’t for at least another one, I honestly didn’t know if I’d ever see you again. None of us did. Discord was the only one who had hope that you would return tonight, and it was only because of him I made it to today. Even then… I did end up taking a train to Canterlot two weeks ago to demand a better answer from Twilight than just ‘He’s alive and he might tell you next month’. Rarity came along because she was having the same problem.

“We’re the only two that knew ahead of time that you had fought in two battles, and while that gave us some clarity, Twilight would only tell us that much. She kept saying…”

“You had the right to tell us whatever you needed to, but Fluttershy, Rarity, and everypony else has the right to at least know,” Twilight finished somberly. Ray turned to face her, confused slightly, but also ready for an explanation. “Ray, I wanted you to choose how much the rest knew about the war and your struggles out there. It’s not my place to tell everypony else what you don’t have the strength to say, either. Whatever you think we can handle, you tell us, and what you may wish to keep private, do so at your own discretion.”

“We knew you were at least alive and unharmed, but we… didn’t know about your friend,” Fluttershy muttered, her eyes once again refusing to meet his. There were tears slipping down the fur of her face now, causing Ray’s heart to twist in his chest.

“Fluttershy, you were right to be worried, and I was wrong to have not at least showed up, like I said,” Ray restated, rushing to his bed to comfort the crying pony. “You have every right to feel mad at me for being negligent. It was my choice to leave you in the dark and let things sort themselves later, and now it’s time to sort them out. You don’t need to feel guilty just because you learned the reason why I decided to stay away.”

“You warned us about this though, before the war even started and you had to go,” the pegasus protested, breaking down completely. “You told us what you might go through, and we disregarded them as just words, hazards that were real and pains you would suffer. For some reason… for some reason I never thought you’d ever lose somepony so close to you. I didn’t even think that many Fallen would die! B-b-but… I just- I know I’ve been ignorant. We’ve ignored those things, a-a-and now you are suffering and we’re only worried about yourselves.”

“You mean you’re so worried about me it’s made you sick,” Ray corrected gently, resting a hand on Fluttershy’s back as he settled on the bed. “It isn’t selfish to be worried about me, or to demand that I assure you I’m alright. Sure, knowing is for your wellbeing, but you’re only demanding such because you love me. Just knowing that once a month I can take a small break from the war to spend time with you all gets me through these rough months. Now you know that I’m safe and dealing with the loss of Garish… better. It stings still, it’s a fresh wound, but I’m not leaving it open. In time, it’ll be a scar, a memory of an immortalized friend. Knowing that I’m alright- with everything- would you please forgive yourself?”

“I… suppose when you… phrase it like that,” Fluttershy sniffled, finally looking up at the human with mournful eyes. Smiling sadly at the mare’s misery, he pulled her into a half hug, shooting a glance at Twilight as he did so. The Princess was staring grimly at a spot in the floor, obviously in deep contemplation, but at the very least she seemed satisfied with Ray’s handling of… whatever this was.

“Hey,” the human inquired, earning Fluttershy’s tearless gaze. Smirking, he told her, “I heard Discord moved in with you.”

The singular statement caused the mare’s face to go from cream to red in seconds as her eyes widened and she shrank away slightly. Looking away, she mumbled something so inaudible, Ray only knew she was talking thanks to the slight movement of her mouth. Withholding a chuckle, he slyly asked, “What was that? You don’t talk loud enough when you’re all flustered like that.”

“Meanie,” Fluttershy spat, though there was a notable lack of bite to her bark. In fact, looking closer, he realized she was smiling through her embarrassment, turning his wry grin into a gentle one.

“Well, I’m glad for you two, really,” he told her encouragingly. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Rarity sitting patiently at the edge of the bed, waiting for him to be finished with Fluttershy. More to come then, he mused to himself before giving the pegasus a quick squeeze. “Discord’s doing what Discord does downstairs. He’s already managed to accidentally destroy Sugar Belle’s pies. Would you mind making sure he doesn’t intentionally destroy anything?”

“Okay,” Fluttershy agreed hesitantly, only momentarily shooting a look Rarity’s way. “Thank you for this, Ray. And thank you for being so honest too.”

“Twilight, would you please help Fluttershy,” Rarity asked suddenly.

“Oh,” Twilight lightly exclaimed, unable to hide her surprise at the unicorn’s request.

“I need a moment alone with Ray,” the white mare clarified bluntly, and even though there was undoubtedly something concerning about the request, the human couldn’t stop himself from smirking at Twilight’s befuddled expression.

“Of course, if you wish,” the Princess replied, clearly confused. However, she followed Fluttershy out of the room with one last uncertain look over her shoulder before shutting the door behind her.

“So… what did you-” began to ask before finding himself once again interrupted by the tight embrace of a pony. Rarity’s hug squeezed him around his stomach as she leaned face first into his side, letting out a shaky sigh as Ray slowly returned the motion.

“I’m sorry, I just really needed to feel that you were actually here,” she shuddered, relaxing her grip slightly. “For this past month all I’ve done is think I should’ve given you a tighter hug last time. I was confident that you were okay, even when everypony else was certain some terrible fate had befallen you. As soon as Twilight told us that you were alright but couldn’t see us, though, I knew something else was wrong. Even though Fluttershy was certain you were hurt or had something worse happen, she was upset that you hadn’t proven you were alive and recovering. Personally… I was stricken that you wouldn’t confront us with your problems. It was only after we forced your confession from you earlier today that I realized we were no match for the problems you were facing.”

“You knew I was alright but still upset,” Ray questioned, confused a little by the mare’s mantra.

“I knew no harm had befallen you, or at least, I thought that, even though it seems the truth is otherwise,” Rarity confirmed.

“Wait, but I wasn’t injured at all,” the human replied, confused.

“Don’t play the fool with me, dear, I saw that little scar across your back and know it’s new,” the unicorn scolded unhappily.

“No, I swear I don’t- Oh wait, I do remember,” Ray exclaimed before chuckling to himself.

“What’s so funny about it,” Rarity inquired curiously.

“I didn’t sustain that injury from a minotaur,” the human revealed with another snort. “My first injury of the war came from a Fallen who ran a bit too close to me with their spear. I honestly forgot that even happened. Did it really leave a scar?”

“Yes,” the white unicorn confirmed, her gaze going from his face to his shoulder. Reaching up a foreleg, she rested the cool chitin of her hoof on his scar there, the one left by Cohin’s spear. Ray watched as it slowly drifted its way down to his prominent stomach scar where it hesitantly hovered right over the patchy skin there. Finally, though Rarity pressed her hoof against it, shuddering slightly.

“So many scars, and so young,” she wondered out loud. “You walk around baring them without a second thought, and so often we look over them without a care as well. Yet they represent how close you’ve come to death already, before this war even began. You’ve always been on the front lines of some conflict, yet you survive nonetheless. I think that’s why I’m so confident in you, Ray. No matter what, you’ll win the day for us and your Fallen.

“These scars… they’re your Cutie Marks, the definition of you as an individual. We should stop concerning ourselves for your wellbeing as we have. This lifestyle is your domain, and those distant wars are what you are best at doing in life. Maybe if we paid more attention to the fact that you have yet to fail, we’ll have the confidence to stop prying at you for more than what you need to give. We’ve already taken so much from you… it’s time to stop being vultures and instead try to be doves. We know you’ll be alright because you’re Ray, an unstoppable, loving force of nature that would do anything just because it protects us. I think that’s our mistake, forgetting exactly who we’re talking to and worrying about.

“That being said… while you’re able to handle war better than us ponies, we can still teach you a thing or two about your emotions, namely your self-worth,” the mare concluded with a caring grin. “You still seem hung up on the idea that, when this war is over, everything will be right in this world if you simply didn’t return. I’m going to change that.”

“I’m sure you will, Rarity,” Ray agreed, smiling slowly. Standing up and walking towards the door of his room, he opened the door, quietly telling her, “You almost already have.”

Author's Note:

Sorry this took so long to get out. Questions, comments, and concerns welcome and wanted.

Comments

[BlazenWolf2019]

Good work, bud! Keep it up!