Also will he become batman like vigilante? That would be cool if he will use his abilities in effective way Maybe also use technology for invisibility, magic invisibility is probably expected and searched for
Good chapter, can't wait for next one, and o really love this fic, the concept (of what I read and know besides portal) has Never been done and I REALLY love this, oh and don't rush that's how you kill your fic, have a good one and thanks for making this
9761735 Yeah, well I like what you did also we got a non-kill-all skynet, Terminator cyborg with a brain that's also technically a Prince and in someworlds the king or co-runer of pony kingdom
Well played *claps* well played Can't wait to see miss mad-scientist princess Twi, does next
9762943 Now that I think about it I really want him to create group of hackivists like Dedsec from Watch Dogs 2 or anonymous He could: 1. create a group and be known inside as creator, boss of it and all or be a member of high council and almost no one knows he is creator of it or noone does 2. Create a group that public will think have members but really will not and be used as a mask run by himself
In all of these scenarios he should also create a secret identity and maybe even be a vigilante that would be know as member of these groups or not
9785145 I wanted to have a sense of that Bender was kind of like Jotaro and Johnathan, with a cold outer exterior, but loving and a gentleman when with friends. He's also very smart, and has good deductive reasoning that can help in many situation. I would provide examples but most of them haven't been written yet
I can see that, it's fitting if I am honest. Though I have a feeling that him quitting the Force is gonna have larger repercussions, more so seeing as Twilight will stick her nose into it.
I can also see him pulling off Alucard, sadistic-good with a hint of massacre when needed.
Thank you for understanding my stance on the matter, but if it helps any make less use of transitions and focus on fleshing out a scene you've already written. The main problem this story suffers is that one moment, something happens and once it's finished another thing abruptly happens without establishing a clear flow that can ease the readers into the changing transitions which then leads to an incredibly jarring experience.
Looking at the time between chapters, it seems like you want to set up a consistent schedule of updates which is either 1-2 days or you subconsciously do it, and both are bad since you're not giving yourself time to think and review your own story and see if it's truly up to your satisfaction.
My suggestion is rather than trying to update your story in the least time possible, take at least a week of writing, this will allow you to have time to see where you can improve a chapter while also lessening a burnout. Readers can be incredibly patient, I've seen a story in quotev that took a year-long break and once it updated it still kept consistent popularity, think about that.
Good story so far, I found the interrogation to be a little lacking... However, he is only a Human/Robot/Pony thing... So I understand him making mistakes....
Good going on the story keep it up I'll read more when it comes out.
Wow what a wimp. First sign of trouble and he turns tail and runs. He can perform stunning acts of heroism and lawyering, but when it comes to being discovered it's all the sudden too hard to avoid detection. Everyone's head should be spinning from the whiplash of disloyalty be shoved at them.
9845239 It more that he doesn't think that the risk of being arrested or being discovered is not worth the benefits of the police records, since he would arguably have better access and resources on his own.
9845500 Access to police records isn't the only benefit though. 🙃 besides, he has a super-duper hack device, there's no barrier in that regard anyways! Losing human resources and the right arm of the law would have much harsher consequences than "being discovered", especially since as a Gary Stu he should find hoodwinking his way out of the truth rather trivial. Think about it: he has the ability to alter the operation of any computerized equipment, and magic to boot. Rewriting the scanners to not detect him as anything other than a typical anthro unicorn would be easy, and there are assuredly counter spells to subvert magical scans performed by any normal pony. The only thing he can't control is eyewitness accounts of his bulletproof-ness, and that's countered by discrediting the witness.
i really that when bender gets found out about being a sentient machine that they will let him live.
more please
He should have left a virus so he could monitor all police action
Also will he become batman like vigilante?
That would be cool if he will use his abilities in effective way
Maybe also use technology for invisibility, magic invisibility is probably expected and searched for
*SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIUUUUUUUUUUGGGGHHHHHH* I hate bad guys.
9760506
Well, he is technically a cyborg now. Even has a fleshy brain.
9760798
true but will everyone else see it as that
9760974
Well, there is only one way to find out.
Good chapter, can't wait for next one, and o really love this fic, the concept (of what I read and know besides portal) has Never been done and I REALLY love this, oh and don't rush that's how you kill your fic, have a good one and thanks for making this
A VERY fine choice of a villains music!
9761418
Thank you.
9761299
It's really no problem. You know, I just got the idea randomly while reading another fic, and it just kind of took off from there.
9761735
Yeah, well I like what you did also we got a non-kill-all skynet, Terminator cyborg with a brain that's also technically a Prince and in someworlds the king or co-runer of pony kingdom
Well played *claps* well played
Can't wait to see miss mad-scientist princess Twi, does next
9760614
Who says he didn't?
For all we know he could have.
9762943
Now that I think about it I really want him to create group of hackivists like Dedsec from Watch Dogs 2 or anonymous
He could:
1.
create a group and be known inside as creator, boss of it and all or be a member of high council and almost no one knows he is creator of it or noone does
2.
Create a group that public will think have members but really will not and be used as a mask run by himself
In all of these scenarios he should also create a secret identity and maybe even be a vigilante that would be know as member of these groups or not
9763025
I like the idea, but we will just have to wait and see what our little author does.
9763667
Who ya callin little
9763837
Not my fault you're bite size~.
9763969
Byte size
9764525
9764525
But I can't eat that kind of byte...
Or can I?
Time to do some... tests~
9764898
… this got weird
9765142
That was my intention.
9764595
9764595
Fuc- Finley
9766586
update??
Looking forward to more AWESOME chapters!
9776523
I finally decided to come over and read this, now I am kinda sad I didn't sooner
Also why does Bender give me this JoJo feeling?
9785145
I wanted to have a sense of that Bender was kind of like Jotaro and Johnathan, with a cold outer exterior, but loving and a gentleman when with friends. He's also very smart, and has good deductive reasoning that can help in many situation. I would provide examples but most of them haven't been written yet
9785212
I can see that, it's fitting if I am honest. Though I have a feeling that him quitting the Force is gonna have larger repercussions, more so seeing as Twilight will stick her nose into it.
I can also see him pulling off Alucard, sadistic-good with a hint of massacre when needed.
Edit: also getting that sudden Batman feel.
I wonder if Bender will become like Batman beating the Sh*t out of Jokerz 🤔.
Update?
9803096
Not yet
Mi Gusta. :)
NICE
9804021
Any update ? You don't have to upload an chapter right now just asking if things are alright
Great story you have here, I hope to see more at some point in the future
9829806
Hmmmm.
9843735
Thank you for understanding my stance on the matter, but if it helps any make less use of transitions and focus on fleshing out a scene you've already written. The main problem this story suffers is that one moment, something happens and once it's finished another thing abruptly happens without establishing a clear flow that can ease the readers into the changing transitions which then leads to an incredibly jarring experience.
Looking at the time between chapters, it seems like you want to set up a consistent schedule of updates which is either 1-2 days or you subconsciously do it, and both are bad since you're not giving yourself time to think and review your own story and see if it's truly up to your satisfaction.
My suggestion is rather than trying to update your story in the least time possible, take at least a week of writing, this will allow you to have time to see where you can improve a chapter while also lessening a burnout. Readers can be incredibly patient, I've seen a story in quotev that took a year-long break and once it updated it still kept consistent popularity, think about that.
9843994
yeah, I get that. That's exactly why I stopped writing my first story, and my second has been on such a long hiatus.
9844169
That's good, always better to keep one's health in mind after all, especially as a writer.
Good story so far, I found the interrogation to be a little lacking... However, he is only a Human/Robot/Pony thing... So I understand him making mistakes....
Good going on the story keep it up I'll read more when it comes out.
Wow what a wimp. First sign of trouble and he turns tail and runs. He can perform stunning acts of heroism and lawyering, but when it comes to being discovered it's all the sudden too hard to avoid detection.
Everyone's head should be spinning from the whiplash of disloyalty be shoved at them.
9845239
It more that he doesn't think that the risk of being arrested or being discovered is not worth the benefits of the police records, since he would arguably have better access and resources on his own.
9845500
Access to police records isn't the only benefit though. 🙃 besides, he has a super-duper hack device, there's no barrier in that regard anyways!
Losing human resources and the right arm of the law would have much harsher consequences than "being discovered", especially since as a Gary Stu he should find hoodwinking his way out of the truth rather trivial.
Think about it: he has the ability to alter the operation of any computerized equipment, and magic to boot. Rewriting the scanners to not detect him as anything other than a typical anthro unicorn would be easy, and there are assuredly counter spells to subvert magical scans performed by any normal pony. The only thing he can't control is eyewitness accounts of his bulletproof-ness, and that's countered by discrediting the witness.
9846316
yes, but what about medical examinations, surly a doctor would notice something strange.
9846383
Why would there be medical examinations? He's never harmed or injured, there would be no need.