Chrysalis places an ad in a local paper looking for victims to lay eggs inside of and kill. She gets a reply from the one pony she never would have expected, and then breeds an army to take over Canterlot
The best part about this story is simply chapters 1 and 5, and only then the conversion\brain death parts. Everything about this is simply too gross for me to really want to read. You may want to re-evaluate your audience a smidge, since people who are into body-horror Cronenberg scenarios generally aren't into willing conversion into brainless broodmares, and vice versa. Plus the violence is consistently overdone and over-focused on, making it seem more edgy than anything else, for the sake of being edgey.
If you enjoy writing this, then more power to you, but I personally would recommend deciding conclusively whether you want to write Austin Powers or The Thing. Switching between them like this just makes people lose interest, even in the parts they do like. And I'd give all five chapters another editing passthrough when you find time, they're a bit of a mess.
9135572 I am writing what the commissioner asked for and building up for a really epic final scene. I am sorry the editing is a mess, this chapter was pushed out on a mobile device and will be edited once I have time. I would go back and edit everything, but with my current pricing I have to push out the writing quickly with only a short editing process. The only time I have to edit is on my one day off, which I normally spend sleeping.
I do really like this story however, and I am planning to go over it once it is finished.
Edit: Also, I love mixing humor in with horrific horror. Austin Powers and The Thing sound amazing, although yes, The Thing did inspire this.
The best part about this story is simply chapters 1 and 5, and only then the conversion\brain death parts. Everything about this is simply too gross for me to really want to read. You may want to re-evaluate your audience a smidge, since people who are into body-horror Cronenberg scenarios generally aren't into willing conversion into brainless broodmares, and vice versa. Plus the violence is consistently overdone and over-focused on, making it seem more edgy than anything else, for the sake of being edgey.
If you enjoy writing this, then more power to you, but I personally would recommend deciding conclusively whether you want to write Austin Powers or The Thing. Switching between them like this just makes people lose interest, even in the parts they do like. And I'd give all five chapters another editing passthrough when you find time, they're a bit of a mess.
9135572
I am writing what the commissioner asked for and building up for a really epic final scene. I am sorry the editing is a mess, this chapter was pushed out on a mobile device and will be edited once I have time. I would go back and edit everything, but with my current pricing I have to push out the writing quickly with only a short editing process. The only time I have to edit is on my one day off, which I normally spend sleeping.
I do really like this story however, and I am planning to go over it once it is finished.
Edit: Also, I love mixing humor in with horrific horror. Austin Powers and The Thing sound amazing, although yes, The Thing did inspire this.