Space Ponies
Twilight Sparkle hummed softly to herself as she trotted along the dirt path through the meadows on the outskirts of Ponyville. Celestia's sun shone down on her and a chorus of birds accompanied the clip clop of her hooves. She smiled and glanced up as a flock of sparrows dipped low over her head and then sped off towards the Whitetail woods. Following them with her eyes, the purple unicorn paused as she caught a glimpse of a familiar pink and yellow shape.
Curiosity taking over, Twilight walked to the top of a small grass-covered hill, which was currently playing host to a couple of rabbits and one pegasus pony. The pony was standing stock still, wings pulled tight against her sides, facing the forests beyond the meadowlands. Even as Twilight approached, the pony remained entirely still and quiet, only her mane and tail waving gently in the breeze.
"Hi Fluttershy! What's up in this-"
"AAAAAAIIIIIEEEEEE!!!"
"AUGH!"
Twilight fell on her rump, gasping for breath as her heart thundered in her chest. A slowly descending cloud of dust and flower petals was all that remained of Fluttershy until a few moments later when the timid pegasus peeked back up over the crest of the hill, blue eyes wide as saucers.
"...Twilight? Is that you?"
"Yes it's me," said Twilight, trying and failing to keep the annoyance out of her tone, "and you scared the manure out of me! What the hay Fluttershy?"
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you, but you scared me, and I was so scared I guess it scared you too. Oh dear."
Twilight rolled her eyes as she pulled herself back up onto her hooves. Fluttershy crept back to the top of the hill, looking fearfully about as if expecting additional unicorns to appear out of nowhere. Twilight tilted her head to one side.
"Uh... you're acting even more nervous than usual. Is something wrong?"
Fluttershy nodded frantically.
"Ooohhh yes Twilight, something is wrong. Something is very very wrong!"
They stared at each other for nearly a full minute before Twilight's ears laid back in irritation.
"You want to tell me what it is?"
"Oh! Oh my, yes. Well, you see, I'm being chased by a monster."
The unicorn's eyes widened and she quickly turned around, scanning the surrounding environs for any unsavory-looking creatures. When she'd completed her search and found nothing any more intimidating than a rabbit, she turned back to Fluttershy with a small frown.
"You are?"
"Oh yes!" Fluttershy nodded vigorously, "I saw it just this morning, over by the forest! Oh it was just horrible Twilight, a great tall thin monster, like a tree! Its coat was all mismatched colors and it walked on two legs-" she got up on her own hind hooves and took a few wobbly steps to demonstrate "-and its forelegs ended in these terrible fleshy claws! Oh, and its face, Twilight, it was all punched in and mean looking, and covered in bushy hair, and it was wearing glasses!"
She paused as she noticed the unicorn's expression, which consisted of a raised eyebrow and an open-mouthed grimace. Fluttershy lowered her own head until her mane fell forward and partially hid her face from view.
"I... I have never heard of... anything... like that," said Twilight at last. "Glasses you say?"
Fluttershy nodded.
"... are you sure that was a monster, Fluttershy? Is it possible that it was... I don't know... anything else?"
"Pinkie Pie said it was a space pony," the butter colored pegasus supplied.
"Pinkie said... why does that not surprise me," groaned Twilight, wiping a hoof down the front of her face. "Did Pinkie Pie have anything else to say on this subject?"
Fluttershy nodded. "Yes, she said I had to be very careful that the space pony didn't see me, because if it did then it would probably want to touch my butt."
Twilight gaped. Fluttershy pawed the ground in front of herself nervously.
"So, so I've been standing up on top of this hill, so I can see everywhere around me and so, so if the space pony shows up again, I'll see it coming and I can run away."
"...but... Fluttershy, I snuck up on you without even trying."
"...I'm not very good at it."
Twilight sighed and took a few steps forward, putting a foreleg around Fluttershy's withers.
"Okay, listen to me. There is no such thing as space ponies."
"But, but Pinkie said..."
"Yes, I know Pinkie said. But Fluttershy, please tell me that you know that there are instances, and many of them, where Pinkie Pie is not an entirely reliable source of information."
Fluttershy averted her gaze and nodded.
"Well, I would submit that this is one such instance. I don't know what it is that you saw, but I very much doubt that it came from space, and I really don't think it wants to do anything to your butt. So why don't you just go home to be with your animals, okay?"
Fluttershy nodded.
"I... I think I'd like that... I was starting to get kind of hungry."
"Well there you go! Go home, have a nice lunch, and forget all about it. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go have a long and serious talk with Pinkie Pie about when it is and is not appropriate to make very bad jokes."
* * *
Fluttershy sighed with relief as she walked into her cottage, nudging the door shut behind her. She felt very silly, now. Twilight was right, she did know better than to take Pinkie Pie at her word, especially when bizarre tales about extra Equestrian life forms was involved. She'd just seemed so convincing...
"You silly filly," she admonished herself as she walked across the living room and towards her kitchen, "you're going to give yourself a heart attack one of these days. Now get some lunch and stop worrying about the strange creature that's sitting on the couch."
She stopped mid-stride, eyes practically bugging out of her skull. Fluttershy slowly turned her head just enough to look behind herself out of the corner of one eye.
The space pony smiled.
Fluttershy let out a shriek that could have shattered glassware and fled as fast as her hooves could carry her. She managed a very impressive turn of speed for all of two seconds before she discovered that fleeing when your eyes are tightly closed in fear is not the wisest of decisions and plowed directly into the wall. Knocked silly by the impact, she wasted precious moments scrabbling bock onto her hooves and getting her bearings. By the time she knew what was going on again the space pony had already risen to its feet and was moving towards her with long, loping strides of those terrible legs.
Fluttershy's fight or flight instincts had kicked in long ago, and as per usual her first option was flight. But as the space pony approached her she quickly realized that retreat was no longer an option. With no other choices left, she went all out with the rarely used "fight" setting.
"Go away!" she wailed, flailing with her front hooves while she closed her eyes tightly and turned away so she didn't have to look, "Please, just go away! If you come any nearer I'll... I'll... I'll do something!"
The space pony took each of her hooves in one of its claws, easily stopping their frantic movement. Fluttershy took in a breath and prepared to scream again.
She paused when she felt herself pulled against another body, arms wrapping around her. Cringing, Fluttershy slowly opened one eye.
The space pony had knelt down beside Fluttershy and was holding her firmly against itself, face buried in her mane. Fluttershy whimpered, tensed and ready for whatever was going to happen next. The space pony's grip tightened ever so slightly for a moment, and then it let out a long, shuddering sigh.
Fluttershy blinked.
"... um... excuse me... Mister Space Pony? Um, are you... are you hugging me?"
The space pony said "Mph."
Glancing around, Fluttershy slowly extricated one of her arms from the embrace and gently patted the space pony's shoulder.
"Uhm... there there?"
The space pony let out another sigh, its grip loosening just slightly. Fluttershy nickered softly and put her arms around the space pony, hugging it as firmly as she dared. She could feel its glasses poking her as it pressed its face against the warm fur of her shoulder.
Then, just as suddenly as it had started, the space pony released her. Fluttershy sat down on her rump, staring up at the strange creature with wide eyes as it rose back to a standing position. The space pony smiled at her again, then reached down and patted her gently on the head. That done, it turned and walked over to the door, manipulating the knob with its bizarre appendage before going outside, closing the door behind it.
Fluttershy watched it go in stunned silence, and continued to stare at the door for several long moments after it had left.
"... what the buck was that!?"
Not sure what I just read, but I liked it
Hey, hey Fluttershy... Friendship.
Arrive.
Scare target.
Hug target.
Sniff mane.
??????
Friendship?
SPOILERS:
Best HiE fic EVER. Hands down. It took me until almost the very end until I figured it out, VERY CLEVER! And oh God Pinkie has read too much clopfic. I wish I could thumb up this story again, but I already did for one of the previous "chapters." Why can't I thumb up this set of stories more than once?
Although "Glancing around, Fluttershy slowly extricated one of her arms from the embrace..." Ponies don't have arms.
Also "When she'd completed her search and found nothing any more intimidating than a rabbit..." Rabbits are intimidating as hell. Especially Angel Bunny.
AHHH YOUNGSTERS FREAKING YOUNGSTERS EVERYWHERE. ENDLESS RATTATAS AND PIDGEYS.
*flashback*
1001882
Yes, but that's only because Angel's no ordinary rabbit! He has a viscous streak a mile wide! That thing's a killer! He has huge sharp... He can leap about... J-just look at the bones!!!
1001882
The upper portion of a horse's front leg is actually called the forearm, oddly enough.
1001909
Wasn't my intention to imply that they were going to do so. I'm not saying Fluttershy and Rarity have never made slow, gentle love to each other while under the influence of cannabis. Not saying they have either. I can neither confirm nor deny any rumors of pony lesbianism spurred on by the use of recreational mind-altering substances.
1001977
Angel awaits with big, nasty, pointy teeth.
All the stories are Fluttershy.
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, over.
1001861 Directions weren't clear enough, Fluttershy got caught in the ceiling fan.
1002469
Well here, have another apple and try it again.
For some reason, I just imagine the 'space pony' as the Tenth Doctor just after he killed the Racnoss, and just before he visits Martha.
Poor, sad Doctor. He really needed that hug.
I saw it just this morning, over by the forest! Oh it was just horrible Twilight, a great tall thin monster, like a tree!
cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/24217818.jpg
I saw it just this morning, over by the forest! Oh it was just horrible Twilight, a great tall thin monster, like a tree!
cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/24217818.jpg
Glorious.
lol face
But, sonic screwdrivers don't work on wood. =\
1001977
aye, ya gotta worry about them viscous streaks, they keep dripping everywhere.
sorry, couldn't resist
Seriously though, that IS one mean rabbit. If he's the standard for harmless, that hill could be crawling with bears!
THAT. WAS. BEAUTIFUL!
Humans are now space ponies, it is official
Space Ponies is a planetary resource and an achievement on Sins of a Solar Empire.
Their icon is an older generation pink earthpony wearing a fishbowl helmet.
Naturaly I always move my capital planet as near to the Space Ponies as possible.
I defend them with my Empire's life and have been stuck in hour long battles to keep them.
No one can have my Space Ponies.
By the will of the Advent...
They.
Are.
Mine.
1001977
I was totally thinking of that when that scene came up. Thanks for proving I'm not the only person that quotes that movie.
-SoI
Haha, very nice! I could totally see it as the Tenth Doctor, but then again I could also totally see it as just a random human.
i liked this....
Lack of butt-touching. Uncle, I am disappoint.
1104922
I considered doing a lot more with that, but I don't want this fic to be rated Mature...
1106819
Not like that you dirty beardo.
Just as a random nod to Pinkie's warning.
Like "space pony" suddenly runs back in and gooses 'Shy's cutie mark before leaving again, leading to Shy wearing her football helmet on her rump for the next 3 weeks.
1106944
... that's an incredibly adorable image. I'm going to have to use that somewhere now.
"Fluttershy, Why... are you wearing your football helmet on your butt?"
"Rainbow Dash told me what gingering is."
"I swear to Celestia's sun dappled haunches I am going to murder that filly."
"... why does it feel so cold in here all of a sudden?"
1109454
Gingering is the term for horses, but the purpose behind it is related to animal behavior. For sapient ponies, I would imagine they would be more familiar with figging, which is the same thing but with both the animal husbandry and BDSM implications.
890 million dollars U.S. one equestria destination portal generating device
Spending a week trying to find a small cottage
Getting "assaulted" by a hyper pink pony demon after tripping and putting a hand accidntly on her butt.
Finding the cute yellow one
Hugging the cute yellow one and getting a consensual if confused hug back: Worth all of going through hell for
*scratches head* Well that was... confusing. Some suggest the monster was Slenderman, but I don't remember him wearing glasses.
1279004
Honestly, I was sort of describing myself, though it was intentionally vague enough to apply to just about any bearded human with glasses. I always thought ponies would find us pretty terrifying in appearance just because there's nothing in their experience that would prepare them for something that looks like a human. That's why we have to give them hugs so they aren't afraid of us anymore.
1289181
Oohhh, that makes more sense.
Brony:
pinkie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw1369_4KiuK.png
Fluttershy:
pinkie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw607_130331842872.gif
THIS IS PONY LOGIC WERE USING. FLUTTERSHY COULD HAVE USED HER EYEBALLS LIKE A MACE!!!
1005506 HELLO this is RIVER-MOTHER FUCKING-SONG WERE TALKING ABOUT, DOORS ARE A GHOSTY TO GIGGLE AT.
1015355 I DID NO SUCH THI-wait *checks calender* nope, carry on.
ANDIAMO!!!