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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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You might wish to go over the chapter one last time. Overall a very interesting start, however there are still a number of minor typos to be found. Continuing onward.
10326884
Would you mind pointing out some of these typos?
Watch, not clock.
Pretty sure you meant to write swearing, not wearing.
There are others too. One of the big things is that the transition from rewritten chapters to only edited ones is very jarring because so much has changed. One last thing, in chapter 2 you keep writing 'he would' do this or that. It completely breaks the feel of the flow established from the first chapter.
I hope I do not come across like a jackass, but I want to see this story completed.
10326986
No, I appreciate the feedback. I will do my best to finish rewriting the story.
Huh, so his father only cares about keeping the legacy, which is always drooping the company from the father to the son. What a shallow creature. It's only legacy is the company and a son that hates him and would spit on his grave. A worthless legacy, since he himself hates his father and the company.