• Published 8th Jan 2017
  • 3,894 Views, 127 Comments

Pinkie Loves Bacon Bits - Fuzzyfurvert



In between impossible 4th wall transitions on the show, Pinkie Pie appears in Sunset Shimmer’s home and annoys her endlessly about her boobs.

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Panksy Pop

Pinkie Loves Bacon Bits

An absurd Derpibooru-inspired story.

Sunset gaped in disbelief at the screen on her phone. Her call had gone dead a second earlier and it automatically asked her if the number she’d dialed was a new contact.

“Certainly not with customer service like that! First they laugh at me, then they have the gall to suggest I contact an exterminator and a pet psychic?” Sunset hit the home button on the phone and tossed it over to the far end of her sofa. “The exterminator already threatened to call animal services on me about my ‘horse problem!’”

She sighed and slumped into the couch cushions. Sunset was tired. Irritable. The caffeine withdrawal from quitting the energy drinks and cupcakes was still draining her on a daily basis. The little sleep she’d gotten in the last several days was fitful, hardly counting as rest at all. She was so anxious, antsy even, that she could barely sit still for long in her own home. She needed to find a fix for the situation and soon.

Sunset gave her phone another glare. “Stupid exorcists...chargin’ too much…”

She groaned, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hands for a moment. She needed to get up and get back to her applications. Summer wasn’t going to last forever and she still hadn’t heard anything back from the ones she’d already put in. She needed to get up, fix some tea and really hit the job sites. Maybe make a sandwich too. She needed fuel if she was going to get done anytime soon.

Sunset yawned, her jaw popping loudly. “I’ll get…” The rest of her sentence ended in a mumbled collection of noises that didn’t resemble words so much as snores, Sunset’s eyes fluttering closed.

When she opened them again, her living room was dark, only dimly lit by silvery moonlight coming in through her windows. Sunset blinked, confusion running over her face at the seeming lost of time and consciousness. Her grimace twisted when she looked down at herself and noticed that while she was still on the couch, she’d somehow acquired a blanket and pillow. Judging from the slightly musty smell, they were the ones she kept in the closet for her occasional sleepover guests.

“When did I...why am I not...what?” Sunset sat up, pulling away the blanket. Her mouth made a silent ‘O’ when she did so, feeling skin slide over skin and weight shift dramatically under her shirt.

As if she suddenly lacked support she’d enjoyed earlier.

Sunset yanked up her shirt, confirming that her padded underwire was indeed missing. Instead of white cotton and polyester, she was greeted with tan skin and pink spots. The quiet of her home grew deafening to Sunset’s ears and she slowly lowered her shirt back in place before looking around carefully. She squinted at the darker shadows, searching for any hint of something out of place. Nothing moved or made a sound.

She swung her legs off the couch, vaguely relieved that her pants and underwear still seemed in place. Sunset threw the blanket to the floor and fished around on the far cushion until she found the hard plastic and glass of her phone. She brought it to life with a touch, it’s tiny on-board light shining like a torch. She pointed it into the darker recesses of her living room, banishing the darkness in small patches.

“Uh...pony?” Sunset swallowed hard, hoping that a flash of pink wouldn’t jump out at her. “God, I sound like a loon...if only I knew what you wanted? Or even your name?”

Nothing of any shade jumped out, let alone moved, as Sunset panned her phone’s light around. She took a deep breath and held it until her lungs started to ache. She let out the breath slowly, willing her heart beat to slow with it. The rub and slide of the cloth of her shirt was distracting, but Sunset forced herself through the whole exercise.

When she felt better, she climbed to her feet. “Maybe...I passed out, then woke up, got the blanket and took off my bra…and then went back to sleep? Which I don’t remember? Not every weird thing that happens is the fault of a pony that might not even be real.” She slapped her cheeks then she felt another yawn coming on, and then grabbed her phone once more. The battery was low, but she could still get some sleep in her actual bed and get it charged if she plugged it up now.

Sunset grunted and shuffled out of her living room area and around the corner to her small bedroom. She checked her dresser, but all the drawers were closed and she didn’t hear anything out of the ordinary coming from her unmentionables. She stood still in the doorway, letting the calming noises and smells of home wash away her anxiety over the random visitations.

A pony was appearing in her home. A pony pony, not some animal. Which was impossible. Even if she allowed herself to imagine that such a thing was possible without the portal at school, there was still the issues of the pony not being human and being the size of a large house cat. All those facts combined made her doubt her own mind at times.

Sunset shook her head, smiling ruefully as she flipped on her light. “I wonder if the pony is supposed to represent someone at school I know? I wouldn’t think going cold turkey on cupcakes and energy drinks could make my subconscious act up like this!”

She laughed to herself, stepping into her room and setting her phone on top of the nightstand by her bed. She bent down and fished out the thin white cable that transferred power into the small device, and plugged it in. The screen blinked happily at her before going dark again as it started to charge. Sunset moved to pull back the sheets on her bed when she caught a speck of color on her phone out of the corner of her eye. Just above the red and yellow smudge of her own reflection was something blue. Sunset raised an eyebrow and looked back over her shoulder and upwards.

Her bedroom ceiling was covered in bras.

Sunset’s breath caught in her throat and she felt cold. She slumped backwards onto her bed, mouth open as she made a series of choking noises. Dozens upon dozens of bras were pinned to her ceiling, their straps intertwined together and their hooks all snapped neatly to each other. There were black full cup bras. There were white lacy demi-cup bras. There were blue sports bras and pink underwires.

All together the bras formed a now familiar pink equine face with big blue eyes smiling down at her.

“W-w-wait…” Sunset worked her jaw silently for a moment, her eyes bouncing from one pair to the next, “I don’t...I don’t own this many bras…”

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